please help

my3girls

 Sue...yeah...I think like you do sometimes...wonder why, or what did I do?? But I know things all happen to us for a reason. I think I know why God laid this on me...he has several reasons.

Anyhow..I have been sleeping on that side..so maybe that is why.  Who knows.  I just want to feel really good again!!

Well..just a quick update...because I am still at work, and it looks like I will be here for at least 2 1/2 more hours!!! GRRRRRRRRRRR...I hate flight delays!  I wanted to update you on the ex's..sentence today.  For Falsification charge..he got 3 days in jail, which he can serve w/in the next 80 days, and $150.00 fine, for the Theft charge..he got 30 days in jail, but only has to serve 7 of them. Also another $150.00 fine. If he should contact me in anyway..he has to serve the whole 30 days.  My friend gave me this info.  Some people do not think it's enough punishment...but I guess I am happy that he is being punished!!

Back to work!

xoxo

Lisa

1Cathi

Hi Sue,

I used to think I had done something wrong -what a horrible person I must have been (as I did make some major mistakes in my life) Now I choose to believe "I was Chosen"  because I can do something "GOOD" or Make   a "Difrence" SOME HOW OR SOMEWAY  for others.  Oh I still think it stinks sometimes  - but I think you, me and the rest of this wonderful bunch of gals - have not been cursed with this disease we have been blessed with strength, courage and foratude beyond anything we could have imagined.  We have grown friendships, and we are teaching our friends and family that no matter what junk is dumped in a persons lap -  YOU CAN GET THROUGHT IT - YOU CAN LIVE ON AND SURVIVE!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Anonymous

Hey, Jule, I hope you weren't feeling guilty or worried about my night in the car. I only mention it because it was such an adventure and made me feel like a kid again...way cool! However, I don't plan to do it again anytime soon.

I'm sorry about your phone and everything else. It would have been fun to see you again. My greatest disappointment, however, is not getting photos when we had the chance. I thought we could get them over the next couple of days. That means we have to do it again, doesn't it?

Good attitude, Cathi. I admire you. My attitude is that this is a load of crap I don't deserve and there is NOTHING good about it. Period. So which of us is happier and will live life to the fullest? I gotta get a grip.

That's all the energy I got tonight. Here's a photo of me sans Jule that Devin took:

 

my3girls

Judie...nice pic!  Devin is even talented as a photographer! I wish you and Jule had gotten some photos to share with us.  That does mean there HAS to be a next time!

Cathi...I really like your outlook. I have tried to feel the same way and look at this bootface just as you do. Sometimes it's hard, but for the most part, I do feel stronger, and like I can face absolutely ANYTHING from now on!  I know my girls look at me like I am stronger from all of it.

Well..the arm is feeling better today (but I have that darn headache). I do think it was from sleeping on it the other night. Slept on my back all night last nt.

ok...off to work...have a wonderful day sisters. I will be checking in later!

xoxo

Lisa

NancyD

Sue, The way I look at it is, many people have other trials and tribulations. We may very well be cured of Bootface and go on living a happy life...but people like my brother D will NEVER be cured of their pigheaded stupidity. He'll wake up every morning and still be a jerk. LOL.

Can you tell I'm down on him this morning? He causes my father such worry. He's 55 years old and I think he STILL thinks he's in his glory days of high school when he was a star athlete and everyone doted on him. He got away with a lot of stuff then, and he's still trying to get away with stuff now, over 35 years later. He's also the oldest male of the siblings (however one sister and I am older than he is) which he thinks gives him special privileges...unfortunately, I think my father does give him preferential treatment. And all that would be fine if he was a worthy, noble being...but he's just a jerk.

Ladies, I'm happy to say I'm down to my last five rad treatments. I thought I was going to be done around 10/6, but then was told my appointments went to 10/13. However, the techs told me yesterday that 10/6 would indeed be my last treatment. So it was a good Monday! I hope everyone's Tuesday goes well!

1Cathi

Hey Jule - love the picture.

Well let me clarify a bit because you are right BC "IS CRAP" but I was for a point letting all the bad I felt from it over take my entire life and every thought, 

its crap that at 46 and one month married I was told I had BC

crap that I had to enduce toxic drugs into my body

crap that I had to have 33 rads treatments,  crap that I have had 4 surgeries and 5 other biopsies and crap that in just a few weeks I  have had to make a decision to remove both my breasts  -  your right it is all total crap for all of us - those of you who have endured so much more than I. but I have to believe it is not just for "NOTHING"  I don't walk around all happy and say "yeah I got BC now I am a better person!" That would be crap -  I just have to believe that if nothing else my daughters like (Like Lisa said) are learnig what strong woman they can be in the face of "CRAP"

I have told my hubby if someday it is decided for me that BC will be the cause of my passing-  noone  had better ever say "I LOST MY BATTLE" in a eulogy  -  because I have won every battle with this stupid disease - 

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Anonymous

Judie

It was a long weekend, but everything (other than me missing more time with you and Devin) worked out ok. I finally had time to go to the cell company last night and get a new phone so will you please email me your number again so I can call you in the next couple of days? The water wasnt friendly to the sims card so lost all numbers too....

Thank you for the picture....I too thought we had all weekend to do pics, but there will be lots more visits to get them....I really want to come to visit Seattle and go to the theater and Pikes as I havent been there in years.....so look forward to it Judie....I actually think we should make it yearly....no matter whats going on you should come here for a few days and I will come there for a few days...Maybe at some point some of the washington ladies from the other thread could join when Im over there....

Cathi-I too love your attitude and I TOTALLY agree about the eulogy stuff!!!!! "IF" I die from breast cancer I dont want it anything to do with services referring to it.....it has taken enough from my life as it is....its hard for me to explain and I havent really spoken the words out loud to anyone but I have thought about it quite alot. Thank you for approaching the subject.

To everyone else that I havent spoken directly too....dont think Ive forgotten you....I have just been extremely busy but you are always in my thoughts.

Hugs

Jule

dreamwriter

Cathi has a point.  I have won battles against breast cancer.... why would I want people at my  funeral/memorial service say that I lost the battle.  I think I have done the amazing... lived past all of the so-called anniversaries and outlived the bell curve for survival.  According to my therapist I am in the "what not" category.

1Cathi

Jule,  I would think there are not to many of us or anyone in life who is hit with a diseas that has not thought about eventual death -it is a hard thing to think about of coarse  -it is the one subject that my husband truly does have a hard time discussing or even listening to, and I understand I sure do not want to think about him not being here with me. But things like BC  - slap us in the face with our mortality,  I do not think about it as much as  2yrs ago when first DX, but every time there is a test or something the thoughts and plans do cross my mind -  but I think in a positive way - if that makes sence.  I think it sad when you here or read

Jane Doe lost her battle with cancer today -  while I sure hope and pray I have a good many years left to become VERY OLD AND SENILE -  if the case were at hand - this is what I think

JANE DOE "A VICTORIOUS WINNER" in all of her battles with BC is at peace today.

Well anyway I hope I haven't offended anyone or made anyone sad,  just my thoughts and WE ARE ALL WINNERS!!!!

XOXOXOXOXO

Anonymous

Oh Cathi you didnt offend me at all.....I completely agree with what you and I think it is a very good topic to visit with here about since I think MOST people hesitate to speak about it very openly with their families or significant others even though it is something that is brought formost in our minds the very moment we hear the words "you have cancer"....

We are all in this together here and I have always appreciated the very fact that I CAN come here and speak my mind because I know everyone here will always understand....

I also wanted to welcome you to this group....Ive read some of your other post in the past and have always thought they were/are very informative, sensitive and just plan enjoyable for me to read....

Hugs

Jule

sueps

Cathi ....

Yes I love you!!!  BOOTFACE CRAP CRAP AND MORE CRAP ...lol HAHAHAHA...

 We are winners!!!

Period ladies ...it must have been P M FREAKING T !!!!

I love you all xxx

YES I DO!!!!

I often think it is far harder ...far far harder for the ones left behind to pick the pieces up...

OK I will shrrup now

BOOTFACE YOU STINK!!!!!  

1Cathi

Sue I know that you have sons - you might think what will they ever take away from this junk, but all that you have endured from this they will learn something, they will grow to choose strong and accomplished woman in their lifes -  BRAVE AND WONDERFUL WOMAN  just Like their MUM!

BOOTFACE BE DAMED  -  "VICTORIOUS WARRIORS" ARE EVERYWHERE!

sueps

YES !! 

 HEAR CATHI BOOTFACE??? 

YOU ARE SURROUNDED BY THE STRONGEST OF STRONG AND OVERPOWERED.... SO STICK YA GRIMEY BULBOUS HANDS IN THE AIR AND HOBBLE AWAY AS FAST AS YA CAME...SHOOT!!!

....GO GO GO ....I AM CLAPPING YA AWAY..... NOW FREAK OFF YA LOW ROTTEN IMBECILE...!!!

WE ARE AS ONE .... ONE LOVE UNITED IN VICTORIOUS BATTLES...!!!

SO PEE OFF YA SCRATCHY BAG OF VERMIN!!!!!

 YEEE HAAAAA !!!!!

lol  

soz sisters just a little eruption xxx 

honeygirl

Sue , you crack me up! I swear , when you get on a "bootface tangent" I can actually see it playing out in my head!lol And that was a good one. Do you remember in the movie ET when the little girl , (drew barrymore) scared ET by her screaming when she saw him? And he when screaming and running with flaling arms in the air!?lol Thats how I see bootface running when you give him a good rant! Bravo!

sueps

HAHAH THATS MY FAVOURITE FILM lololololol

Awwwww ET come home I love you pickle xxx

Mel soooooooooooooo funny !!!!! 

sueps

Awwww I CRY AT THAT FILM....I cry with the funny parts too...lol.... he's real you know .... 

BEDTIME for me grrrrrrrr ...I hate getting up the crack of Dawn ...I mean I hate gettin up AT the crack of Dawn xxxx

SIGH .... big loud sigh....not an ahhhhhh but an URRGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! 

love love and more love to ma beautiful winners!!!! XxX 

sueps

The most adorable !!!

xXx 

sueps

GOOD NITE GIRLIES !!!!   KISSES XXX

honeygirl

Oh Sue , that is one of my all time favs too. I love when he touches the flower and brings it back to life. Good night Suzy-Q! love ya , Mel

honeygirl

Anonymous

Sorry the pic was so huge. I think I've fixed it.

Lisa, I challenged Devin to do some shots of me. He's strictly a nature photog and has such a good eye that I knew he would do great portraits. When Jule and I get together over there, expect some great photos!

Here's his favorite...the little doofus!

Nancy, I LOVE your analogy! I'm sorry you have to deal with such a brother, but he is a wonderful example, you know...of how lucky we are to have a curable disease! Congrats on being almost finished with rads and actually having a good Monday. Those tend to be rare even in the best of times!

Jule, you are welcome here any time. I will find a way to cross those mountains again, I swear. Put my phone number in your little black book, will you? Never rely on technology!

Cathi, my statement about crap refers to my poor attitude. I understood your post and am envious. You have a fighting spirit that is willing to discover something good in the midst of this dance with bootface. You are an inspiration and a winner.

Mel and Sue, love the ET stuff. I love that movie, too. It was excellent on so many levels.

Fumi, Ulla, you are loved. Tie a knot in the end of your ropes and hang on. Let us know if we can throw you a life preserver. 

AE...yes, we are a bunch of party animals, aren't we?! What can be next? I'm not sure I want to know.

May each of us have one more day...

Judie

Shirlann

Nancy, Oh, there is so much of life that is unfair, but one of the hardest things is when for whatever reason, a parent decides that one kid is "special" for no other reason than a silly one, and no matter what a jerk they turn out to be, that one kid is always the favorite.

Mel and Sue, I too, loved ET.  He was so sweet,a and he got to go home, just like Dorothy.

Fumi and Ulla, dear girls, all your hurts will be helped and all your grief will be better, just hang in there, hang on, better days are a comiing!

Jule you are always welcome as a cool drink of water on a hot day!

Judie, you are adorable int he pix!  It is cute as a button.

To any sisters in our wonderful group that I missed, tons of hugs and kisses,  Shirlann

1Cathi

Oh I know Judie what you meant and again you are so right BOOTFACE is CRAP and many a day I am right there with you -  I love the pic - I think Devin must be a real hoot.

Nancy congrats on completing the rads soon,  where I went they actually gave a little cupcake with a candle in it to celebrate, and I even think I was offered the mold for the boosters I don't think I took that.  Weird thing I actually cried my last day - not for joy of being done, but going for 6 weeks I got used to seeing and talking to a few folks.  WOW what this thing does.

You all have a great night,  One of my favorite shows "Biggest Looser" will soon be on.  I lost over 75 pounds about 7 years ago (when I dedided to finally dump the stinky EX and get smart) so the show just keeps me inspired.

CHIO -LOVE TO ALL

Wren

Judie, you look so cute in your photos! I just want to hug you!

Sue, you do the BEST job ever of "telling off" bootface! I swear I could just see what you were saying... and then to see the ET photos! I'm laughing my head off! Priceless! Never lose that spirit and spunk. I just love it!

Nancy, congrats on allllmost being done with treatments! Yay!

Ulla and Fumi, I'm thinking of you and sending warm wishes your way.

I think of you all daily--and hope that you have more sunny days than rainy days...

Hugs!!!

my3girls

Good morning sisters.  Thanks for the good wishes Wren...and I need a sunny day today. However it is raining outside...and the dreary day is already playing on my mind. I have been feeling somewhat down ever since my last surgery.  Could it be that the hysterectomy has messed with my head? I am still taking my effexor...but I just really don't feel like ME!! I don't have much get up and go or pep in my step. I sure hope it comes back soon.  Possibly the combination of change in the weather, shorter days and the surgery. I guess I need think more positive and wipe the slugish feelings, and the WORRIES...oops..did I say worries..out of my head!  I will try!

Nancy...so glad you are finished with rads!! You go girl! It seems like your journey went fast...of course not for you...but you did soooooooooooo well with everything!! You are amazing. Sorry about your brother. Siblings...some are just troublesome from the start..and they never change. I have 6 siblings..and luckily only one is like that...and she stays away!

Cathi..I agree...when I do pass, and I do think about it.  I want my eulogy to say the same...not that bc got me..but that I fought it...long and hard. It's hard not to think about the what if's...just as long as we don't dwell on it.

Judie...Devin is a hoot!! I love the pic...

Susie Q...I love your ranting too!! I too, picture your fiesty little body...ready with boxing gloves, and beating the CRAP out of BOOTFACE!!! You are so funny!! We have to get together...some how!!!!

I love ET!!! One of my favorite movies! It's been a long time since I saw it...going to have to rent it.

Well...just got back from my power hike in the rain...off to work.

I need to tell myself..positive thoughts...positive thoughts......

xoxo

Lisa

lvtwoqlt

Checking in this morning, I also love ET. and Sue I can see you ranting like a looney to scare away bootface.

Nancy congrats also on close to completing rads. My mom still huggs her rad oncologist when she sees him. He moved from the unit where mom had her rads to the new unit in Lenoir and he has been a speaker several times at the support group meetings and also runs at the local RFC.

Judi the picts are great. Sometimes we all get crazy photos that we don't like but others love.

I came in early this morning so I wouldn't have to use an extra hour of my vacation time to go to the funeral today. My mom is picking me up to drive the 20 miles to Hickory, we are in a serious gas shortage due to the hurricane that hit Texas a couple of weeks ago. The fuel pipeline from Galviston was shut down because of the hurricane and just started pumping at 100% but it takes 8-10 days for the fuel to get from TX to NC. Many stations are out of fuel and when they get any they are swamped. Does anybody remember the gas lines in the 70's? That is exactly what it is like in our area.

I need to get back to work.

Sheila

livesstrong

Mornin' Ladies,

Just a quick pop in for me - can you believe I NEVER saw ET!!!  Guess I missed a good one.

When I have more time I'll tell you my take on this whole bootface thing.

Until then - have a great day-

AE

1Cathi

Hey Lisa - I hope the sun comes out and shines all over you!!!!  That is the thing I hated the most when I lived in upstate NY,  I could tolerate the cold it was those endless days of gray in the fall/winter,  it does impact ones moods for sure.

I have a pretty big house with lots of sleeping room & on the beach if yeah ever need a change.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

portiasproudmom

Hi everyone!  I don't have a lot of time, but I just had to catch up on recent posts.

Judie, the pictures of you are adorable!  I love the goofy one!!

Sue, you just KILL me with your rants!  Thank so much for making me smile!

Did anyone catch Oprah yesterday?  I loved that she had Christina Applegate on, but our story would be even more heartwarming and inspirational.  Don't you think??

Love to you all.  Gotta run!

Hugs,

Karen

lvtwoqlt

Karen, I did not see it but my mom taped it for me and will bring me the tape tonight. I did read a synopsis of the show on her site and it sounded like it covered most of the ground about the problems women face going through chemo but stressed early detection.

Sheila