please help

portiasproudmom

Hi ladies!  I'm sorry that so many of you are ill.  I had my flu shot last week (I procrastinated this year) and I'm feeling okay.  I hope all of you with the flu are feeling well again soon. 

Well, my dh finally went to the doctor yesterday after having burning pain and tenderness below his ribcage for about two weeks.  The doc has him a little freaked out.  We figured it was probably his gallbladder, but now the doc has mentioned bootface (among other things) and is sending him for bloodwork, an ultrasound, and a chest x-ray.  I'm praying there's nothing seriously wrong with him.  I don't know how much more stress our family can handle.

I'm off to put up my Christmas village.  Chase is unpacking the box--I'd better make sure he doesn't break anything.

Love and hugs to everyone,

Karen

EWB

I've seen this mentioned before--what is bootface?

lvtwoqlt

ewb - bootface is our nickname for breast cancer. Sue started it by saying that she didn't want to say cancer and came up with the name bootface.

geebung

Dear Karen, I'm praying that your dh is only suffering from heartburn or something easy to treat. It's sure to be something minor but understandable that you are worried.

Hugs,

Jane xxx 

dink

Hey ladies,

I made it to work witout any problems.  I keep forgetting about the drain and pulling it and boy does that smart.  I went with my DH to the Christmas parade to watch the grandchildren - their mom refused to take them.  My little grandaughter is a cheerleader (6 y/o) and my little grandson is a flag football player (5y/o) and this was their first year to ride in the parade.  They loved it.  It did make me feel better last night but tired.  Have any of you taken the flu mist instead of the flu shot?  I did the flu mist and I won't do that again - strange feeling to the nose - made me feel like I was drowning.  I don't make much money either but I'm roud of what I do make and I try to remeber to give to others in some way even if it's not always money.  I have a wonderful boss and he pays well especially with Christmas bonuses.  He takes care of his employees which I can't say for all employers.  You guys have a nice evening and I'll check in later.  Oh anyone have any suggestions on what to stuff with now?  I hate to go to meeting after having breasts and now having none.  I don't know if I can afford the prosthesis as I will be doing Santa for the five grandchildren as their mom can't afford anything and has no help but my husband and my self.

my3girls

dink....does your insurance covre a prothesis? I never got one, since I had reconsstruction 4 months later. I used a "fluffy". I got it at a place that sells the prothesis etc. It's just like cotton batting stuffed into a shape that fit's inside your proth. bra.  That was very sweet of you to take your grandchildren to the parade....and for being their Santa! God bless you.

(((((Karen))))))...hugs to you honey...you don't need these extra worries.  I pray that your dh pain, is nothing more than something very simple. Hugs to you honey!! have fun with Chase putting up your Christmas village.

I want to start getting my Christmas decorating going...I just don't feel like it...but I guess I have too..haha.

I found out last night that the problem with Oliver..and I can't remember if I told you all about his not able to walk correctly lately..and not acting right..well the vet said his knee caps are off. It can't be corrected except with surgery! Poor baby..he is going to have the surgery next Friday.  Bad thing..it's costing me $1200.00 that I DONT HAVE!!! I am feeling anxious about that too..right at Christmas time.  Oh Lord help me!!

I have to get going my day at work is over in 5 minutes.

I love you all!!

xoxox
Lisa

lvtwoqlt

Lisa, I know about needing to spend money you don't have. Last week my washer broke, it did the same thing a couple of years ago and cost about $75 to fix, the repair man is coming tomorrow to fix it, I didn't get paid til this week. Monday afternoon, I ran out of Kerosene for my heater at the house, to put 100 gal in will cost close to $400, so we are just putting in 5 gal at a time at $20 a can. Penelope has a fatty tumor growing at the base of her tail and the vet will have to do surgery to take it off. She had another one taken off 2.5 yrs ago when she was borded at the vet when I went on the road with Donald for a week and that bill was over $300 for the week and the surgery. I don't know where all the money is coming from to pay for everything.

Sheila

dink

Ladies I'm sorry about the hard times we are all having but it does make me take notice of the little things that I have forgotten about.  Isn't it weird how all that happens.  Lisa, what happened to your baby's knee caps?  He sure is luck he has you.  Sheila, I wish there was something I could do for you but you will be surprise where the money will come from.  Just look for your little miracles, they will be where you least expect them to be.  Ms. Karen,  I think your husband will be fine maybe it's his time to be down a little so he can realize and understand how guilty you feel at times for being sick and not being well enough to do some things.  Maybe he will once again remember that you didn't pick to be sick - it just happened.  I'm not putting him down but I think God uses the little things not to just remind us of what is important but the things around us.

Lisa, thanks for your advise.  I will call a place here and see what they say.  I haven't checked with the insurance company.  I'm a little afraid to because I do eventually want the reconstruction again.

See you,

Leesa

geebung

Dink, the fluffies tend to ride up a bit because they are so light. When I was in hospital, the breast care nurse showed me how to anchor the bra to my panties with a piece of elastic like those ones that women used to wear to hold their stockings up before pantihose. I've also read that you can put round pebbles into your bra, rice, dried beans etc to give it some weight.

I wish reconstruction could be included in the cost of the mastectomy! (For the same cost - not extra). I know someone whose total cost for recon (she had a tram flap) was $30,000. I don't know how much she got back from her insurance but even if it was $15,000 -$20,000 it's still a huge amount. I got my hopes up the last few weeks, thinking I might be able to have a DIEP but it's just going to cost too much and there are so many other expenses just living day to day. I guess I will just have to learn to love my flat side! And you are right there are little miracles and joys each day. I need to hold on to that thought.

NancyD

Ladies, I haven't had recon and still just use the fluffy inserts. I've found that strapless bras have a band of elastic around the bottom edge to help them stay on...and it ALSO keeps it from riding UP! My strapless bras are my favorites now.

EWB

Shelia-  thanks for the bootface explanation.

Elaine 

livesstrong

Hi Ladies -

Can't help much about reconstruction - I had a lumpectomy.

Sue - WTH??? - Get to the bloomin doctor, missy!

Karen - OMG - I can so relate - Delbert, my bloodhound is having surgery on Monday to remove 2 fatty tumors and to have his teeth cleaned ( his gums are terribly inflamed over his canine teeth) to the tune of $1100.00!!!  Thankfully I get an unused sick check every year at this time but was hoping to pay some bills off and use some for Christmas - oh well - that's not going to happen.  It never ends, does it.

 Jane - good to see you back - we missed you!!

Mel - miss you!!

Judie - I just want to hug that little one!!

Shirlann - have a great time - wish I was going with you.

Karen - please keep us posted on your DH - praying its nothing serious.

Hugs to all,

I gotta get back to work,

AE

1Cathi

Karen I am so hoping your hubby JUST has a gallbladder issue - XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Leesa I would check with your insurance,  mine (BCBS) is actually paying 100% for 2 sets of prosthesis and 4 Bras. I have the bras and prosthesis for those, in about 4 months I can go back and get fit for the form fit ones. It never hurts to ask, I was shocked , but they are both dif CODE #'s and BCBS does it.  The other thing that has worked for me as I can't wear the prosthesis and bra alot yet because of my Left side and healing issues. I have a few of my regular bras that are lightly padded W/no underwires,  if I put those on they are quite comfy and fit flat enough to the chest to not be lumpy while still giving a bit of a "busty" look.  But it has to be the flat padded cup to work.

Well my cold/flu contiues to hold on,  UGH -I am over it!!!!!

The economy sure is ruff right now,  I guess the only good news for us right now is Ed's business is picking up, as he sells used cars, with the BIG 3 in trouble and people not being able to afford new car loans right now -  things are a little better but not great so like everyone else we watch our $$$$$$.  My company/agancy is kinda on the small side and I am lucky there as well, a Christams bonus has always been in the budget, of coarse I don't take any amount we have received in the past as a sure bet for this year -  a bonus is a bonus and what ever it is will be appreciated.

My COBRA ended on 11/30 so now I am on a private policy gosh it costs a fortune, and I thought COBRA was bad.

Well good day to all,  AE thinking about you and 12/11 -  wishing for a BIG FAT B9

Cathi 

dink

Karen - any word on your husband?  Is he ok?

Sue - are you feeling any better?  I'm worried about you head?  Any changes?

Thank all of you for your suggestions on the breast thing. I have really felt weird being at work this week without any stuffing or anything - scrubs can cover a lot.  I think it's just me thinking everyone is looking at my chest and they really aren't.  I haven't had any boobs since I was 9 years old - that's been a long time and lke Cathi - I loved my girls.

Cathi sorry you still aren't feeling any better.  Did the doctor give you a steriod shot to help with the cough and congestion?

Gotta work - oh I got a huge surprise my mom called this morning at 7:53 am and she is driving 9 - 10 hours to stay with me one week and help at home or in the office.  I have to myself for a week which I haven't gotten to do for a long time - that is a big picky-me-up.

Leesa

my3girls

Leesa...my little Oliver is not even 3yrs old. The vet said that his knee condition tends to happen in this breed. He is a little yorkie..4lbs! It also can be hereditary. The ligament over his knee which holds the knee cap in place is off...which pulled the cap off.  Poor little baby!

I am so fortunate to have really, really good insurance.  I know like Jane said, my tram flap surgery was around 40,000.00!! I think I paid $10.00...if that! Very fortunate that my insurance is soooo good!  I pay about 200.00 a month for me and 2 of my daughters to be covered.  That includes dental and vison.  Leesa...my fluffy stayed put, because I bought special bra's from a shop that has an insert to put your prothesis or your fluffy.  I still have 2 of these bras.  My insurance paid for most of their cost as well. I forget how much they were..but it sure made life easy for those 4 months.

I know allot of women chose not to be reconstructed, and I believe it is a personal or financial choice.  I am blessed that I had the option (without cost) to do it.  I know for me...I could not feel right without being "whole" again.  I am so busty...it would have been very strange for me.

Val...you and I are in the same boat with our furbabies! We love them though.  I got a check that had left over money from my insurance company to put on a new roof...Thank God!! So I have the money to pay for the surgery...I just really wanted it for my retirement account! Oh well!

Cathi..hope you are feeling better. It seems so far that this has been a bad fall for colds!

Sue..get yourself check out dearie!

Sheila..just when we think we may be ahead..money wise...something ALWAYS comes up! Such is life.

Leesa..funny how you mentioned to look at the blessings and miracles we have...THAT IS SO TRUE! I was very upset about this newest problem...and then my Dennis said..honey..look at the positive in your life...don't dwell on any negative!! You have the money...some people don't..etc...he is so right! I know looking back at how things have worked out for me in my life for so many different situations..and you know the Lord is in charge!

xoxo

Lisa

1Cathi

Lisa your last paragraph just hit home for me - because I will admit, I have been very cranky and grumpy this past week doing alot of complaing about a cold/Flu.  It just really has me upset that for the past 2 years I have dealt with bootface as hard as I could, I have dealt with severe gastro issues and just when I think it is all behind me -  I get this - I know it will pass, but I am so sick of not feeling 100% - thats all I want , the DR has me on antiboitcs, and cough suppresent, my fever is gone, but I feel like crap, my head and sinus are causing constant headache, I just don't know why this has me so upset. 

Well I'm sorry for being a big baby,  and complaining over a cold,  I just want normal again.

my3girls

Normal is not a bad thing to want!! Don't feel bad Cathi...esp. about "complaining"..that's what we all do, and that's why we are here...to help each other.

You know your ill feelings will be a thing of the past soon...just hopefully very soon..right?! Luv ya!

sueps

((((( Cathi ))))))

Please know I feel so like you today!!! and have a heavy flu xxx Maybe we are drained and hacked off .... flu and colds are rotten !!!! Oh my .... lets both fight thru it xxx

Hey I just registered for the race for life nxt summer and I need to get fit n healthy HAHAHAHA as if!!

DOES ANYONE HAVE MAJOR PAIN/ACHE /STINGY/DULL IN THEIR SCAR AND UNDER ARM...WORSE IN WINTER OR AT EXERSION...14 MTHS AFTER,,,,,PLEASE HELP X

I LOVE YOU SISTERS VERY MUCH....

LIFE RIGHT NOW IS A STRUGGLE...

feeling lost ... need to get grip!!!

DO ONE BOOTFACE  

dink

Cathi, you have every right to feel miserable my goodness you are sick.  You are the one that always make us laugh so it worries me about the cold lingering.  If you're not better in another day or so you may want to get rechecked - please don't get worse.  Lisa, aren't the kids great.  They do and say things you never expect and it sems to occur at just the right time.  I think this season / winter is going to be a bad one so lady's / sister's please take care and don't ignore your symptoms.  We are all fighters and with this being the holiday season we don't want anyone to know just how we are feeling.  In other words don't be like me and ignore everything when there was really something going on (lost all my reconstructions).  Sue, I hurt from time to time but mainly where the lymph nodes were removed from the left axillary area.   Today has been a trial but funny.  My little 5 year old grandson was whiny this morning and he didn't want to wear a certain pair of jeans and instead of just changing he was whiny.  I told him to stop or I was going to get his hiney and he looked at me and said you can't catch me because you're sick so I started chasing him and ran right into the computer armoire right where the drain tube was and boy did that hurt.  I started crying and apologizing and I made myself laugh and told him I was just tricking him because he was so fast.  He turned his head after he was sure I was ok and then the tears started.  I looked like Porky Pig on the cartoons running into something and bouncing off.  LOL

Leesa

1Cathi

Hey Sue, we'll get through this stinky flu stuff.  But just like Leesa my underarm area does tend to ache on from time to time, I believe also that is fromm the lymph node removal 2 years ago,  I don't really have any discomfort from the mastectomy scars as far as pain goes,  R side is just perfect, healed and smooth, but the left is lumpy and bumpy and tends to drain still a bit. But no pain.

Leesa I am supposed to call my GP back Monday if not feeling better, gosh I don't wanna go back again.  I can just picture you with your grandson - funny -but yikes the pain. 

dink

Cathi - my little grandson was funny.  I'm glad you're going to be rechecked. 

OK, I have to confess - I thought all was well with me but I guess not.  I talked with the insurance compan and they will pay for the prosthesis due to failure of the reconstruction portion and they will cover the new reconstruction when we decie to do it.  The bad news is I have to wiat six weeks and the lady said "That's not that long to wait for"  I told her I appreciated her help but I needed to go.  I had to cry a minute as you say Hannah is every where.

My friend called to check in on me and she asked how my husband was handling my no boobs and I told her not well - he is definitely a boob man.  Then she made me feel unloved and unwanted because "He should love you no matter what and want to have sex even without boobs.  I told her I had to go.  She meant well but talk about being knocked down.  It's one thing for us to talk about it because we are all there but for her to state how my husband should feel kinda of paturbed me.

1Cathi

Oh Leesa sorry about all the "inconsiderate" things you have heard today -that plain and simple stinks.  The 6 week wait I guess is standard for prosthesis, thats what my surgeon told me as well, however she did push for me to go 1 week sooner as my insurance was changing, and Blue Cross did not fight her on it. 

Some men  are boob men, some are legs, some are A$$,  but I am sure no matter what he LOVES you, and just as it is an adjustment for you it is for him as well,   I say when you are alone (hope I don't offend anyone )  do something wild and crazy, take his focus from the chest to the booty or legs or something,  practice a little "sexy" dance or something, you know what I mean.  Open a bottle of wine have a glass (or two) . 

You know my hubby does not have a problem with it at all, and even though he has seen my flat chest many times -  we have been able to be intimate since the surgery I do not go topless for that, I know he would not mind, but I can't, but a cute little cami top works great for my peace of mind.  And you can find some really cute sets with the little shorts that show a bit of "cheek" YEAH!!!!! 

OK I NEED A COLD SHOWER -LOL

portiasproudmom

Hi everyone!  I won't be around for a few days--heading to Oregon for my dh's grandmother's 90th birthday celebration. 

Poor little Oliver!  Wow!!  What they charge for pet surgery is unreal, isn't it?  We paid about that much to have a rock removed from Buddy's intestine a few years ago.

My brother's dachshound has a fatty tumor on her left butt cheek.  They've opted not to have it removed since she's so old (13). 

Have a wonderful weekend, ladies!  Take care and be well (especially those of you with the flu).

Love and hugs,

Karen

lvtwoqlt

Well I have done my Christmas spirit duty at the office, I assembled the 7 ft tall tree for the lobby today because orders and the phone calls were slow. It only took me 2 hours to sort the branches and figure out which ones go where and I only ended up with 3 branches left over. I can't figure out where they go except back in the box. The other woman in my department said she will help decorate it next week. When I put the one up here, I don't feel like putting the one up at home, what's the use of putting up 2 trees? I did put the angel on the top before I got all the branches inserted.

We have decided that if we put 10 gal of k-1 in the tank every other week ($40), it may not be cheaper in the long run but not so much out of pocket at one time ($370 for 100 gal delivered).

About the intimacy dept, even though I had recon, right after surgery, I wore the cute silky cami's to hide the red scars, now, just over a year later, my scars are greatly diminished and I don't care. My hubby said he didn't care what I looked like, he was just grateful to have me with him.

Sheila

honeygirl

Hi all you wonderful ladies and UB! I am just popping in to say hi , and that I miss you all soooo much! I read some of the posts , but if I try to read all , I will not have time to write. Sorry to hear so many are sick. I guess it is that time of year. Get better soon. I had my colonoscopy today. The doc said everything looked good , he removed two very small polyps and will have them biopsied , said they didn't look cancerous to him. So hopefully , my bowels are fine! Boy , did I ever hate the "half-lightley" I had to drink. A glassful every 10mins. 2 liters in an hour and a half! Yuck  , I almost didn't make it. Yes , all you ladies who said that would be the worst part of it all were right.

Well ladies , I am doing OK. I still have my moments. I feel very homeless at times. But for the most part I am doing well. AE , did you have your biopsy yet? Hope all is well with you and UB.

Sue glad you had a great holiday. Sorry you are sick. Hope you are better too.

Lisa , miss you! love you  , Jane , Shirlann , Nancy , Judie , Jule , Fumi , Karen , Sheila , Kaloni , Cathi , Kathi , Dink , Ulla , Love to you all , and anyone I missed. Take care , happy holidays.

Love , Melody 

NancyD

Sue, I'm only five months out from surgery, but I stilll have some pain...sometimes sharp, but mostly dull, burning sensation. But I'm not worried because I've had major surgery before and I know it's not unusual. It's the nerves trying to regenerate. If you feel it mostly around the scar where it's been numb since the surgery, that's most likely what it is.

The other possibility is that there are scar adhesions internally that are being pulled by exertion, or fluid changes (increases/decreases) that come and go.

And here's the strangest part. You might feel these things a little distance away from the actual place they are happening because the nerves aren't directly connected anymore so they run in a roundabout circuit. So feeling something in your upper arm may actual be from lower down the side of your body.

Cathi, flu...what a sucky thing to get over the holidays and so soon after surgery. I feel for you. But you sound like your recovered. If you can think about sex and need a cold shower, you're recovered,

Mel, so glad you can at least get online to read. I know that happens to me more than not...read and then run out of time on my breaks or if I'm using my laptop it heats up and stops--or I lose the connection.

Lisa, it sounds like you're doing great! I love to hear that. What schools are Olivia looking at for next year? Emily's decided to stay around and go to the community college. She's been in a special program doing her high school senior year there and will only need another year to get her Associate Degree. And I will be able to send her to some special summer programs at schools like Pratt or Parsons in NYC so she can get a taste of them. It should help her decide when she's ready to transfer, then.

Emily just got a job at the local mall at Hollisters (for those without teens, it's one of the overpriced clothing stores they love, like Abercrombie and Fitch or Aeropostale). She starts on Sunday as a floor model. Basically, stand around greeting people as they come in, straighten up clothing displays as people rifle through them, and direct people through the dark rooms to the area they want. I have to say, of all the teen clothing stores, this was always my favorite because they had big comfy chairs in the center of the store where I could just park myself while Em shopped and tried things on.

Love to all, I've got to jump off now before I lose my connection. The wireless antenna on my laptop is funky.

my3girls

Thanks Nancy...I am doing pretty good. Olivia is looking at a few local colleges..she wants to live on campus for a year, then she would like to move to NYC or California and go to school there.  She still wants to get into modeling and or acting.  We shall see.  I am just glad she has decided to apply to a college period!!  Emily was smart to do some classes during her senior year...it's FREE credits!! I tried talking my odler 2 into it, but they never did.  They both will have very large student loans to pay back. Esp. Danni...with Grad school and cost of living in Chicago!! Yikes!

I am at work today, just poped in to say hello.  Mel....SOOOOOOOOOO happy that you came back to say hello.  I know this is a hard transition time for you....know that I am thinking of you all the time..and wishing you the best! I love you Mel!! You are such a wonderful beautiful person!

I't snowing like crazy here...and the temp is about 19!! Very cold!  Should be a fun drive home at 5pm!

Dennis and I are planning on doing a fun party/hotel thing for New Years Eve.  I don't have the day's off, but I put in for a vacation day on New years day, and a sweet co-worker here offered new years eve off for me...she said she would work for me...because she is SO happy that I have Dennis!! How sweet of her!!

Ok..back to work...xoxox to all!

Lisa

hollyann

sueps...I still have the aches, pains and what not in my scar and under arm ares and it's been a yr and 10 months since my surgery...It is worse when the weather changes.......Hot showers help alot...Just let the water spray on the area like a massage...Hugs and good luck.....Lucy

Shirlann

Hi everyone, good for you Cathi, having a Colonoscopy, what a fun day that is!  However, I do have to say I would rather go there than to a dentist!  EEEHKKKKKK

Our Sue is just so run down.  She will get everything that comes in the Subway Shop.  Hopefully, by next winter, the immune system will right itself.

I know that I get pain in my arm and under my arm and my treatment was 10 years ago, doesn't feel right a lot of the time.  Funny, I have had 2 C-sections, no after-effects at all.

I sure wish we all were getting $10,000, instead of the car companies getting so much.  But I do feel sorry for the workers.

This may be my last post for awhile.

Take care of each other, hugs and kisses to all, Shirlann

EWB

Nancy- Is your daughter intersted in Art?  I noticrd Pratt and Parsons.  My son is in his 3rd yr at the Savannah College of Art & Design, in Savannah, Ga; he is studying illustration/concept art.