STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

Meow13

I lost my term life insurance when I retired. It was a company benefit 2.5 x my salary. My expenses will have to come out of my 401k.

WC3

I don't have life insurance. I keep getting the "You have been preapproved!" advertisments in the mail though. I should fill one out and send it in just so they stop contributing to my junk mail problem.

AliceBastable

I lost my life insurance at retirement, also. I did find out something interesting from the lawyer who handled my mom's small estate early in 2018. If there's not enough money in the estate to cover incoming bills, the medical bills come last and get written off if health insurance doesn't cover everything. This may vary by state and the amount of the estate and bills, of course. Mom was widowed, so I don't know how it would apply to married couples.

april1964

can you get life insurance if you have BC? I do not have life insurance and since my diagnosis I never bothered to look into because I figured I’d automatically be rejected...

7of9

I have $270k on me and crap, it will be due soon...it's up to $1000+ a year. Going to have to break it down to monthly auto with draw or something. Oh and RITA wants $600 from my husband and I since our community doesn't do reciprocity.

pingpong1953

7of9, I used to live in greater Cleveland and those RITA forms were the biggest pain. Thanks for the flashback!

Meow13

Colonial Penn has term policies for people under 85 no health questions asked.

Artista964

I wonder about colonial penn. Hard to believe anyone would have low premiums with a serious preexisting condition. There has to be catch somewhere, maybe after you pass.

Meow13

https://csn.cancer.org/node/232860

Answer specifically about colonial penn for people with cancer. The 5 year disease free is probably covered as well. All about statistics.

MelissaDallas

All of those “no questions” policies are comparitively expensiv per thousand dollars of coverage. They also tend to be only for low amounts of coverage and may only pay reduced face amounts if you die in the first few years of coverage.

bcincolorado

From the commercials we see here from Colonial Penn it sounds like very low premiums but not a ton of coverage either. May a couple thousand. If you want or need more I don't know if the "no questions" part applies or not. There is a ton of small print on the screen no one can read. Might be worth checking out for anyone not insured right now.

Meow13

Yes you are both right here is something to consider

https://www.bestlifequote.com/blog/life-insurance-...

runor

Molliefish, if you are over 50, with breast cancer and insured for $750,000, Canadian, for $3400 a year, KEEP THAT POLICY! Hub just had his 20 year term expire and they automatically rolled us over to new rates that went from $30 a month (for $200,000) to $260 a month for that same amount of insurance. Insane!

We view insurance as serving a purpose for a set amount of time. We carried extra term policies for the time we had minor children at home to raise. fter that, we let that policy lapse. If Hub gets bumped off at work I am going to be in dire straits as I have been a Domestic Engineer and while I do pretty much everything, I get paid for none of it. Marketable skills? Puhleeze! We do have a small policy we bought in our early 20s.

But as others have said I am not eligible to be insured until 5 years after my diagnosis and even then you can bet the premiums will be .. premium. So I say again, haivng recently looked around at what's out there, if you have $750,000 for $4000 or less in annual premiuims, hang on to it!

mara51506

Another disastrous visit from younger brother. He came for coffee. My mother is newly dx lung cancer stage IV. He spent a long time trying to convince that passing away is peaceful. (He and his wife took care of her mother when she passed from lung cancer so he thinks it is peaceful and nothing to be afraid of. My mother asked him on three separate occasions that she did not want to talk about death. His wife proceeded to tell her that my younger brother feels like he was always shoved in the corner and his opinions never matter and try to lay a guilt trip on a dying woman. He also picked up my tablet and I did not realize that he was looking back on all my grocery purchases from amazon etc and passing judgment on my finances. He got angry when I told him that was not his business. Needless to say, all devices are now set up with a pin but I am so upset with him. Almost don't want him coming by. He still tells me that I should get a job. Um, I have been dealing with brain mets and had massive radiation to my head, twice. I also have had chemo and been in active treatment for 3 years. He believes he understands me and that I am not terminal. I don't spend every day focusing on the dying, but it will be fact sooner than later most likely. He does not understand this dx for myself and the fact I am also looking after my mothers daily needs. Need a break from it all. Thank god for these boards and my social worker since I would have long since gone crazy. I know that if this happens again, I will kick him out.

His wife and him said if they want to come over, they do not want to talk small talk, eg TV shows, movies, even politics. They should actually respect my mothers and to a lesser degree mine since she is the one most compromised. He is a huge stressor, she is 80 and practically bedridden. The fact that they come into MY home which I co-own and disprespect and pass judgment on my previous financial decisions is disgusting. I would keep my opinion to myself if the shoe is on the other foot.

The posiitive to come from the visit is that my OLDER brother and his wife who are trying to help me get back on my feet will no longer have resistance. I do trust them and that all they want is to make sure I will be OK in a single household and not in so much debt. That is a blessing to have unloaded that stress and I can sit back and allow the help knowing that they will not stop me from deciding things.

Still can't believe people trying to guilt trip my mother and trying to tell me I am not sick. They even judged my need to wear wigs to feel emotionally better. It is nice not looking in the mirror and seeing my permanently bald head. Until they experience cancer themselves, they need to stop telling me or my mother how to deal with it. Assholes.

bcincolorado

If they are visiting they should do what the person they came to visit want to do if you ask me. Just my 2 cents.

Micmel

Mara~I have one of those families also. I'm sorry. Cluelessness. Just realize you're doing the best you can, you can take money with you. I've made bad financial decisions and I personally do not care. I'm dying. I just don't know how soon. A lot sooner than I ever thought. But I know I always have been a Good person, friend and child. Sibling... no one is perfect. Those people are just plain clueless and if they did ever get cancer. The world would have to stop for them. I'm very sorry ! Just one day at a time. And next time they want to. Visit. You're just too busy spending money. Hugs to you

mara51506

Micmel, thanks for the laugh. My mother and I had a good chuckle. I may just have to use that.

Micmel

Much love ladies

Lita57

Mara,

I have had to "unfriend" people and ban a couple of my brothers from having anything to do with my life.

They just 'don't get it.' There's nothing I can do to change their opinions, so they are no longer in my life frustrating and disappointing me. It's been a hard thing to do, but I'm much happier for it.

L

Meow13

What a bozo, does he look through your pocketbook too?

bcincolorado

. Hard to believe siblings raised in the same house some times.

Mominator

mara (((HUGS)))

I'm glad you now feel comfortable talking and working with older brother on finances. I hope he's able to help you.

No words for your younger brother and wife. Except, maybe not wear wigs in their presence. Would that help them see you as a person with cancer?? Sheeesh!

Madelyn

mara51506

Meow, I would not put it past him. I've added passwords for my devices.

Lita, I will ask him to leave next time. I can't get too stressed out since I am taking care of my mother.

Mominator, I think it would take a steep decline for him to believe my terminal DX. His wife and my brother believe I will go for years. I tell them while I hope for years, realistically, if the brain screws up, being NED from the neck down won't matter. The extra time I have had in relatively good health has been a gift. A lot of people are not so lucky. When I am gone, they will have to deal with it.

nanette7fl

Sorry to change the topic....My stepson called yesterday to talk to DH and me. He's a recovering codeine addict so it's all about him. I heard DH say she's doing ok just gets tired a lot easier lately. So he puts dear stepson on the phone...He asked me how I'm doing which was nice but when I said the weeks of treatment are getting better side effect wise but that I am increasingly more tired and I don't have the energy I used to have. He replies yeah I get tired a lot too. Work is just so hard sometimes. OMG I'd love to be 27 again and to have eternity ahead of me!! My stepchildren are so clueless. My stepdaughter called DH last week and inquired why I haven't called her to ask for help. DH told if she'd come by and offer to help would be better (I'm not the asking type ...) she had no comment. Again it's all about them. Sigh my 3 kids are different...Mom what do you need? Want me to come down and help? Sorry just needed to dump

mara51506

Vent all you need. Those without cancer don't know what we go through. Try to think of something your stepdaughter can do. People sometimes need something specific to do or need direction.

bcincolorado

I have one kid who thinks I need basically to be an invalid and the other kid who thinks both of us are just fine when he wants us to babysit the 4 grandkids. Otherwise he thinks we are to invalid to live in our 2 story house and need to move closer to them which we cannot afford to do at all and he is clueless.

mara51506

So my privacy was invaded in an even worse way. I posted earlier about my younger brother snooping into my tablet Changed my username and password because he logged into this site as me and read my posts. That is such a violation of my privacy. I never knew he hated me so much but he does. I will no longer engage or talk to him. This site is supposed to be safe to vent without hurting other peoples feelings. I will not close my account but at least he can't pretend to be me. And younger brother, if you read this, know that I will not see you again.

Meow13

Something is wrong with your brother upstairs. I think you are doing the best thing for yourself.

Mominator

"myboobs" if your bozo younger brother logged into this site and read your posts, he may also have read our posts to you. So maybe he learned something like he's being a JERK!!! 

I'm glad you didn't close your account, because we love you. 

Vent away.  

nanette7fl

OMG!!!! What an AWFUL thing to do to you!! May the fleas of a thousand camels reside in his nether regions!!!

Your right in every way and I hope he learns to respect other people in the very near future. Sending (((hugs))) to you