please help

sueps

Cathi Excellent rant...

Gosh Karen ... I am stunned...

And I am very angry .... hold on tight.... xxx I am thinking  

honeygirl

Dam it to hell!!!!!!!!!!! Another beautiful sister gone... Annie , I will miss you soooo much. I LOVED reading your funny , inspiring , intelligent posts. I was very shocked as were others. My heart goes out to her children. They lost their dad not to long ago. Please God , stop the madness and find a cure....

honeygirl

Bootface , you are a seeping sore on the rim of a sick dogs a$$! Stay away from my sisters!!!!! Go find a hole and drag your slimey , sick , flitheness into it! You are NOT welcome here EVER!!!

F'in boil in a bag...

1Cathi

Hey Karen I was just thinking is this your first mammo since rads, and is the change  they mention in that breast, my first one was a bit weird after rads "changes" had to do the whole bit US and MRI and it was still tissue change (swelliny ubscured the mammo) caused by the rads so they said,  and I do believe them as I never really had any more issues in all the other mammos with the bad side it was the good one that started acting up.

portiasproudmom

Hi Mel!!!!!!!!  So glad you're here.  I need to read your kind and gentle words right now.

Thanks for the rants, girls!  Well done!!  I feel better just knowing that bootface has been told off!

honeygirl

Oh Karen , I am sooo mad right along side of you. Please you and Lisa , ((((Lisa))))  remember AE. How many biopsies have you had AE? And she is fine. Just mader than mad each time they make her go through this. The docs are gonna check every little thing out from now on. That is the way it will be for all of us because of bootface. We are all here for you girls. Hang in there sisters. I love you. We are all here ready to rant with you...xxxx

honeygirl

I'm sorry Karen , not so nice , soothing words. But I needed to rant for you , Lisa , all of us.

Karen , you are one of my favorite people ever! I wish I could come pick you up on a flying monkey with a bottle of wine and wisk off to England , after the other flying monkeys got the other ladies here. And then we could all be together. Bootface would run for the hills!

livesstrong

Karen - WTF??????????????????????? This is getting ridiculous.  Mel is right, all the ones I have had came out just fine. I am sure you & Lisa have nothing to worry about. Please don't jump to conclusions.

OK, its my turn - 

BOTFACE - GET THE F&CK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE US ALONE. YOU KNOW GOOD PIECE OF FILTHY DISGUSTING ROTTING  &%*&%##.....................

I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!

AE 

sueps

HAHAHAHAHA AE .... NICE ONE

SO BOIL IN YOUR OWN STENCHY SEEPING PUSS ...YOU PRETENTIOUS DUMP OF CAMEL CRAP... WITH A BOOT FACE  FULL OF WARTS AND CRUSTY SCABBY CRATERS.. LEAKING STINKING RANCID DOG SICK ....

GET OUT OF HERE COS IF YOU STAY WILL BE BURNT TO A CRISP AND STAMPED ALL OVER TIL U ARE DUST THAT BLOWS AWAY ON YOUR ILL WIND!!!!!

NOB THE F CKK OFF !!!

GOD WE H A T E YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU !! 

honeygirl

Lisa , hi sweetie. Glad you are feeling good after you bx. I really have a good feeling about this. Karen too. I really feel they are just being cautious. Believe me , we would be very upset if they just said " oh , its probably nothing , lets just not worry about it"! Then we'd be saying Whatttttttttttt!?!  I wanted to share something with you ladies. I went for my pap test a couple of weeks ago. Now mind you , this is the same gyn who missed my bootface. Said it was cyclic pain. Even though my nipple was inverted... Anyway , The nurse said "just undo your bra , and leave your shirt on"!?! I thought , he is not gonna even look at my boob!? So , I thought OK , maybe its against his religion , (really trying to calm my self at that point), So guess what he does when its time for  a breast exam? Can you guys guess? Only those of you that guess NOTHING , is right!!! He said to me " how often do you see your doc? I said , well I see my onc every three months. He says "does he examine you"? I said yes. He said "well then I am not going to. WTF!!!! Maybe its just me. Maybe cause I had bootface. Maybe cause he didn't catch it. But I would think , he would do his all to make sure he didn't find anything wrong. So  , Lisa and Karen , and AE , I would be scared , but glad that my docs were so intuned to me. So I am looking for a new gyn. xxxx

portiasproudmom

Nice rant, Mel!  I'm impressed!!!!  Thank you.

Cathi, the mammo I had six months ago was the first after rads.  The technician did say that I have "busy" breasts (areas of very dense breast tissue). 

I swear, if this turns out to be something, I'm having a bilateral mastectomy.  I'm not joking!

Hugs,

Karen

honeygirl

Nice one AE! Sue , you are "Queen of the Rants"! lol Excellent!!

sueps

honeygirl

Karen , I agree with you totally. I think Lisa too said in hind sight , we would of had them both cut off. Knowing what I know now , I would have.

honeygirl

Love that pic Sue!

sueps

OK , Karen we are all gonna pray for you EVERY DAY .... I will be saying prayers for you @ work...but you will do good.... have you felt ill or rundown or anything.

We will put up our shields and whack our swords at its  ugly head... xxx 

honeygirl

Down with you ugly bootface!

portiasproudmom

You guys are GREAT!!!!  Sue, your rant had me laughing so hard!

I have to p/u Portia from school.  I'll bbl.

I love you all!!!

Karen

honeygirl

For all my sisters ,

geebung

((((((((((Karen)))))))))) - thinking of you and praying that this is just a very false alarm. They are soooo careful with every little spot and speck after we have had bootface once. It's sure to be just scar tissue - probably a side effect of rads. You might remember that I got a call back in November and, even though I got the final result (a new cyst) before I left, it was very scary.

(((((((((Lisa))))))))), I'm glad the bx went well and that you feel good about it. It's sure to be ok - once again, it's better for them to err on the side of caution than to be blasé. When will you get the result?

 ((((((((((Judie)))))))))) - so sorry to hear that you have an infection and I hope it clears up very quickly. 

Wow - there is so much extreme weather at the moment. England is freezing, ditto the US and the north of Australia (Queensland) has terrible floods - two thirds of Qld has been declared a disaster area. And it's even cold in Florida? Crazy weather!

Sheila - great idea re the map with the markers. Ooooh, I wish I could come to! But the thought of you all getting together is so wonderful - I hope you all post lots of pics so I can imagine being there.

Fumi? I hope you will come back here when you have had a break! 

Sue - I think maps should be clearer! I tend to get lost in big shopping malls because they all look the same. I also have difficulty relocating my car in multi level car parks. Mean taxi driver - he should have charged you half price! 

Mel - can you send a flying monkey down here, please?!! 

Love to you all and also to AE, UB, Shirlann, Ulla, Wren, Jule, Kaloni, AnnNYC, Nancy, Suebee, AnnW, Cathi, Cheryl, Leesa and everyone,

Jane xoxox

my3girls

Sisters!!!!

Thank you for all the good wishes, ranting and Mel...that beautiful prayer.

Karen...darn it!!! I too think it will all be ok. They are being very cautious. I really feel so much better today, then I did yesterday. I hope I am not having false feelings.

Fumi...COME BACK!!!!

Good to see you Mel!!! Don't you just love Karen's hair?  I think she looks like she is in her early 20's in that pic!! Rockin hot!

Can't post much tonight...it's cold as heck here...computer say's 9 degrees!!!! BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.  I have to get to bed now. I am picking up extra hours..so I will be working tomorrow at 4am until 5pm!! Long day. I have our lunches packed..Olivia's and mine..and I am heading off to bed.

Mel..did you see my post about Dennis?? Kinda sad. I miss talking to him. Who knows..maybe sometime next week I may call him. I said I didn't want to be friends, cause I didn't think I could be..but I don't know..maybe I can.

I get my results next Tues. I am off work all next week.  I will be busy scrapbooking Olivia's life!! haha..oh my way behind!

Love to you all! Night

xoxo

Lisa

1Cathi

OH yes Karen I recall that so many times "busy - complicated - dense - " breasts. 

You girls don't beat yourself up over not doing bilat  -  I went lumpectomy/rads at DX in 06, I didn't know any better then either,   sure the 6/mo  mammos are over and US (unless something pops up), and yes the worry and fear does ease, but honestly not 100% at least not for me, not yet anyway. The 'what if" something slipped passed  -undetected in a node or vascular,  espically when it was invasive and very agressive.  It sucks big time that we can really NEVERbe free of worry. 

You all did what was right for you at the time, and if in the future the need to do more arises you will make that decision then. 

LOVE, GOOD THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS FOR EVERYONE.

XOXOXOXOXOX -Cathi

portiasproudmom

G'night everyone!  You've all made me feel so much better!  I love you all!

Hugs,

Karen

Anonymous

Jule, stay put. Everyone else, remove me from your worryscope. Saw my PS today. Mind you, my pre-op info sheet and everything I was told, said 12-24 hours of moderately intense pain. So my expectations were quite different that what I got. So I say to my doc, "My bilateral mastectomy was a piece of cake compared to this." Her eyes get big and she has this totally horrific expresstion and says, "Oh, honey, a mastectomy is nothing. This surgery really hurts. After I had it done myself I wondered if I could ever recommend it to other women."  Uhhhh...thanks for the warning doc! If I'd known what to expect, I would have been better prepared to deal with it. There is no infection, healing is way ahead of schedule, all is well.

What's with the world falling apart right now? Lisa, I was totally thrown off by you and Dennis splitting. I know...it happens. But doggone it...your fairy tale lightened things up around here. Now crappy mammo and biopsy sh*t for both you and Karen. I am "being b-9" in every cell of my physical and spiritual being for you guys. Ugliness is spewing all over the place. We need to scrub it away and paint a few rainbows. Outta here, bootface. At least camel dung is useful as fuel for the cooking fire. Perhaps we can fire up some for a boil-in-a-bag bootface bonfire.

Sue, the vision of our chief bootface-blaster driving in circles all over the US trying to find her sisters is exquisitely funny. It simply must become a movie.

Jane, your posts are cuddles. I delight in them.

AE, your posts bring strength. My whole time here I have looked to you as a leader and source of grit.

Cathie, you are beginning to sound like yourself again. I was worried for a while. We need your carbonating effect.

Mel, it's so good to see you. The prayer is lovely. I miss you when you are gone. I am also missing Shirlann, Fumi, Ulla, and others who have been regulars and are posting less or not at all these days. It's quite normal, of course to always have people coming and going. I love the comings, but the goings are hard. Maybe I need to get a life????

Sheila, I've wondered if all this crazy weather makes truck drivers' lives difficult. Did you end up getting snow, too?

Cheryl, sounds like you have some challenges in your recovery, but an attitude that will get you through.

Leesa, your words about feeling part of a group here were very touching. I think we all have found that feeling here. I just wish we could make this a place filled with beauty and laughter untouched by tears. However, we have found this group where we feel accepted through our tears and must always be willing to shed them and allow them to be wiped away. In between there is much beauty and laughter to lift our spirits.

I ramble on. Doc said I was doing too much and this isn't helping. I better be good.

Judie

portiasproudmom

Thank goodness you don't have an infection, Judie.  Thanks for being here and for being you.  It means so much to have you here.  You are so very special!  Love you, Judie.

Now go rest!!!!!!!!

Love and hugs,

Karen

geebung

I second that Karen! So thrilled you don't have an infection Judie! Your doc's comments about the pain of recon - golly gosh! It doesn't make the whole idea very attractive...I think all you women who go through with it are wonderful. Please be gentle with yourself Judie, you sweet thing - take it easy!

geebung

I have been feeling unwell lately - nothing serious but my period has gone on for more than 2 weeks and I have a heavy cold. I probably caught it because I am run down. I feel light-headed, weak and generally off colour. I wish I could get through menopause and be done with it - the longer I have periods, the higher the risk for a second bootface to rear its ugly head. I wish we didn't menstruate for so long! I was just 11 when I started and still going at 52. I have read that, in some non-western countries where diets are relatively low in calories, girls often don't start their periods until 17 or 18, have their first baby soon afterwards, breastfeed for years (which suppresses ovulation and bleeding), then have successive pregnancies until they go through menopause in their 40s. Therefore, some of them only have few periods in their lifetimes! I also heard that some doctors think that apart from when pregnancy is desired, women should be on the pill to suppress periods throughout their child bearing years - that this would eliminate the risk some of the risk.

cloudhowe

Hi Guys, Scottish Nets here. Thanks for your welcome chappies.

Going to treat this like an adventure, just like a wee hobbit. I've decided.

Battling into the fray, and we Scots have never been defeated.  Just hasn't happened in history. The Romans didn't EVEN get into Scotland, they just built a bloody great big wall to keep us from giving them a hammering. It's called Hadrians Wall and still stands. Scotland alone in Europe and Asia was never part of the Roman Empire..Oh.  Remember Braveheart? The ENGLISH DIDN'T DEFEAT US EITHER. SO THERE!!

Bad news is that it looks like I have the 'bad cancer' - like there's a sparkley, cuddly type? My dx is thus: high grade, poorly diffenentiated, 4cm tumour attached to the skin, ER neg, PR neg, so I think I mus be triple neg. Just did my good stuff on the medical web sites and it looks grim. Any you guys, apart from sweer Sue had similar dx?

From the ultrasound, early indications are that the lymphs are free, but I am getting the sentinal node biopsy on the 12th which will confirm it.  But I now know that I cannot alllow even a 'good result' to lull me into a false sence of security. Because this is a scary thing I have.

I have never known anyone who has been through this, so you girls help will be of the most enormous help.  My only experience of cancer was my brother who really caught the big one - gullet.  He was the very picture of health and had, like me, almost no symptoms. A bout of bad vomiting, put initially down to a bug, in hosp because he was dehydrated, and was given 6 -18 months to live 2 days later while still in hosp. Survived 11 months, and I was there all the way. Still grieving. It was only 2 years ago. We have no history of familial cancer so this happening to both of us is a mystery ......

Anyway, going for a full CAT scan on Friday, echocariogram Wed and surgury Thur, Please pray for me that nodes are indeed clear.  Chemo is due to start early March, onc does not want to risk infection after the biopsy, but my BC nurse thinks they might bring it forward.  BRING IT ON I SAY. Scheduled for 4 sessions (apparently triple responds swiftly to chemo) and then a lumptectomy if it has shrunk.  Poss some more chemo, then def rads. All sounded blissfully cool till I copped on to the fact that there is every chance that the sneaky wee jobbie might ambush me again when my back is turned, poss even mets to the brain. This is the illness that just keeps giving ........

Any ammo you girls have out there for my armoury in this battle? Seems if you survive 3 years, the futures so bright you have to wear shades?

Getting fitted for my wig on Sat! and got my lesson in mad scarf tying this pm!. Bought 6 of them and my sis, 3 neices and my auntie had a wee scarf experiment party this evening! You have no idea how absurd were the fashions we fashioned!! Getting my hair cut pretty short tomorrow.  Did any of you guys lose your eyebrows/lashes or do they tend to stay?

I am lucky in so far as Mr Y - the onc is one of hte most experienced in the country - he even goes to Europe.  He has me on FEC regime? Does this ring any bells out there?

I am a pretty strong old bird, but the mets to the brain possibility took the legs from me.

Did my big cancer shopping spree.  Bit less of a spiritual experience that most retail therapy.  Having fun taking Blood pressure and using the thermomoter. Playing doctors with the kids.  My sis is a nurse and she just tut tutted at me - superrior cow!!! Bought half a metric ton of tissues, anticeptic lozengers, hand gels and sprays, tee tree everything (swear by the stuff) ginger everything, all the probiotics - drinks and yogurts - multivitamens - have I missed anything out??

My doc will supply the mouthwashes, eyedrops etc, and they are prescribed free. Got my filling done today, updated the will and upgraged the life insurance. Life has been a whirlwind. But I still think I have missed out so much.

Signing off now lassies. Look forward to your help, support and advice during this interesting time.  Did anybody else feel like John Hurt in 'The Alien' - an unwanted parasite eating away at you WITHOUT BEING INVITED - how bloody rude!  I's just a wee squatter and I'm  just determined to evict it. Again all advice warmly welcome ...

Godbless, goodnight and sleep well

 Nets xx

portiasproudmom

Nets, you are so funny.  Alien!!  That's great!  That's exactly how I felt--I just wanted that nasty parasite OUT!!!  I have a good feeling about you--you're going to be just fine!  Bootface doesn't stand a chance against you!

Sounds like you have a very busy schedule for the next week or so.  Once things get going, time will just fly by.

I think Sue and Shirlann are the only ladies here who are triple negative.  Shirlann is 8 or 9 years out!  Being triple negative isn't such a horrible thing!

Take care, Nets!

Karen

Wren

Karen, Lisa, and anyone else going through more stuff/biopsies... I'm rooting for you!

Ulla, and others who we haven't heard from in a while... please check in when you can.

Fumi, I hope you come back when you feel able. I love your words and photos.

Shirlann, hope you are OK.

Towhee--you under that hugahan is soooo cute. I'm hoping your pain subsides soon.

Sue, I am enamored with your Bootface Rants! I so think you should write a book of them. I would buy a copy! If you need help collecting them all... I'll volunteer... You know, you've about had a rant for every occasion. I refer to them when I need a good release.

I can't believe HeatherBLocklear is gone. I think I still have a PM from her saved. This just breaks my heart.

I'm doing OK, and I'll take OK over not good any day.

Hugs to you all!