please help

LUVmy2girlZ

Hi Ulla ~

Unfortunately, yes that comes with the territory.  My friend w/ BC is loosing her fingernails now and my niece when she was at the age of 10  diagnosed w/ bone cancer lost all her nails from chemo.  Now six years NED she has the most beautiful nails !!! ( 16 yrs old )  I am so so sorry...the chemo can make one feel as though they are falling apart ...literally!  Perhaps there is someone along the way that can help...perhaps taking lots of vitamin E ???? ...I am not sure (gentle hugs to you Ulla)

Much LUV ~ Feb. Rad sister...

Shirlann

Hi Karen, he is holding an ordinary catfish.  I have a pix of a piranha, but they really look like a carp.  The 4 darling black kids were in Trinidad, the beach scene is St. Bart's, and most of the boaty looking ones are on the Amazon.  a few pix taken on board.  They took us out into the Amazon rain forest in little 10 person boats.  The river is 20 feet above flood right now.  It will get up to 30 feet at highest point.  The trees produce a waxy substance for their trunks and leaves during the flood, then, when it is all dried up, the sun burns off the wax, that is how the trees survive all that water.

The animal is a three toed sloth.  We didn't see many parrots, just little ones. 

The man in the boat was cutting reeds to build things.  The homes along the Amazon are either on stilts or they have pegs on the stilts and they just raise the floor or they have huge logs under them and they float. The buffet, of course, was on the ship.  That is why I look like a baby whale.  haha 

Dear Sue, so sick, and fooling around with my pic.  Thank you, honey, I hope you feel better quick.  It is that lovely English skin that does not like the chemicals.  Inside or out.

Love you all, Shirlann

Ulla

ty so much luv,,its just freaken me to still have SE after i thought am done with all treatments andSE..is that mean they will fall all ,,howlong they need to grow again??

am taking 800mgm of vit E daily..since about 40 days..can that help?

is there anything else i can do...

i am sick and tired of being either under treatment or suffering from nasty SE...is there an end for all this crap...cant stop my tears now,,i thought am done,,it seems am not

Wren

Shirlann! What amazing photos! What an amazing trip!!!

It's so beautiful there too.

You look so rested and relaxed. What happy memories.

I'm so happy for you both.

LUVmy2girlZ

Ulla ~

I am so sorry...I know it seems to add another path to this long journey.  It feels endless at times.  Keep up your nutrition, I know with my niece hers seemed to fall out but once they did they quickly started healing. They started getting a thin shell and afterwords and began getting thicker. 

I would continue your vitamin E that will help w/ the new nail growth.  Perhaps your med.onc. can prescribe some multi-vitamins to help boost your system.  Ulla, there will come a day that this will be all over with!  (((Gentle hugs Ulla)))  Get some exercise and LOTS of rest too!

Much LUV

livesstrong

Ulla, sweetie - sorry I can't help you - I didn't have that problem.  Did you have Taxol??  I know that is a s/e of that.  My nails are VERY thin and break easily.  Not the same since chemo.  Don't fret too much- its only temporary I'm sure.

AE 

Ulla

dear AE

i hade taxotere..i think it is similar,,i just didnt thought of having more SEnow i thought that it might happen during chemo,,not 3 months after chemo...its so scary to know that i may still have SEs from all the poisonning medicens till now..

i hope u all can understand wat i mean

much love

honeygirl

Ulla , I know what you mean , and am so sorry you are "still" going through this. I hate bootface!!!!! I'm wondering , our nails take awhile to grow out , that they were damaged with the chemo but are just know growing out the damaged part? Do you know what I mean? I haven't experienced this , but have read about others here who have lost their nails. Maybe if you post in the tx thread , more women can help you there. Thank God nails are like our hair and do grow back. But it still sucks and doesn't help at all right now. Hugs sweet sister.Melody

sueps

I just want to say I love you all...I am very tired...but am happy .... I have been thinking about my prognisis tonight...hmmmm ...but I wont go there ...I think I decided to live with it a long time ago...live live live love LOVE LOVE AND LAUGH ..... thats all I do these days HAHAHA....

Anyway ...I did come on for something else but I forgot...

My working hours are ten fold what they were...but I have a beautiful shop and I love ma homies xxx

What the hell was I going to say ....hmmmm well I have a day off food shopping tomorra....ARGHHHHH

Sisters .......I L O V E  Y O U  M U C H L Y   X X X

honeygirl

Hi Sue! I'm sooo glad things are looking up for you at work. Its so good to work with people you like and get along with. It makes a big difference. And I'm sure they are glad to have you as their "boss homie"! Love ya , Mel

portiasproudmom

Hi ladies!  I haven't caught up on today's posts yet, but I wanted to share this link with you.  It made me bawl.  This lady is incredibly dedicated to her dog.  I don't know if I'd be able to do this if I were her.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zlhkMwppKw

bbl.

Hugs,

Karen

portiasproudmom

I love your pictures, Shirlann!  You and Walt are amazing to go on such an adventurous vacation.  I love the pic with you and the sloth and of course the one of the food is GREAT!  I'd love to go on a cruise just for the food!!!  Like I need it!

Ulla, my fingernails still look kind of bad with the black stripes.  They're growing out, but it's taking time.  My two big toe nails look like they have a fungus or something.  Really ugly with yellow edges where they have lifted from the nail beds.  With sandal season quickly approaching, I'm going to have to put a nice, dark polish on them.

Sue, bless your heart sweetie.  I'm glad you're feeling happy even though you're having nasty se's.  You are so amazing!  I hate it that they make you work on Sundays now.  Yuck!!  I'm glad you at least are happy with your new homies.

Love to everyone--Jane, Judie, Mel, Lisa, AE, Wren, Nancy, Sheila, Jule, Lucy (where the heck are you??)....I know I'm forgetting people, but I'm sleepy.  You know I love each and every one of you.

Hugs,

Karen

my3girls

Good morning my dear sisters!! I just wanted to stop by quickly.  I am heading off for an ultrasound.  My ob just wants to check things out, and make sure the small pains I am experiencing just above my pubic bone, are nothing. Shirlann, the pics are absolutely amazing!! Thank you so much for sharing them and their stories!! You and Walt look like you had a wonderful time!  You are so lucky to have experienced this! Sue...I hope today finds you feeling better.  Please try to slow down!  I thought you were off on Sunday's?? Don't overdo it!  Love to you sweetie! Ulla...I had Taxotere and losing nails is one of the s/e.  I was lucky...I had 4 tx of it, and did not lose any nails. Right now, my nails are normal.  But during and shortly after they would tear off very easily.  Please ask your oc what you can do.  I heard that tea oil helps. Maybe you can try that. Mel...my new hair do is great!!! I absolutely love it!! I thought it would take awhile doing every morning, but it doesn't.  I dry it with some de-frizz syrum in, with a round brush, just in the front part. Then I straighten it.  It really only takes about 5 min or so.  I have gotten soooo many compliments!! My co-workers say that I should keep it like this, but I really want to grow it back to at least shoulder length.  My hairdresser said, it will probably be there by Christmas, for as fast as it is growing.  I had all intentions to take a pic yesterday after I got home from work and put it on here...but I was so tired, then Olivia and I went to Dad's for dinner.  I will have Olivia do that very soon.  Again..g/f...we need to plan our Sunday!!! I can't wait to meet!!! I love all of you....and I will stop back in tonight!! Have a great Monday! xoxo Lisa

Ka-Loni

Hello Ladies, Oh my Goodness! Those pictures are just beautiful. Shirlann you are great. You live life to the fullest. And, Sue thank you so much for putting them up for us. I like that little Monkey Shirlann is holding. He is precious. And, the food looks great! I would love to go on a cruise. Maybe someday. And melody, hello sweetie.

I am so glad I came here.Your all great here. Talk to you soon.

God Bless,

Kaloni

Ulla

hi dear sisters,,

ust quick hello,,

welcome here kaloni..ladies here r wonderfull,,they r real sisters,,,

still feel bad about the nails thing,,

i am covering them with nice dark color,,but still feel that am not done with treatments and SEs..

love and hugs

NancyD

Hi ladies,

Birthday weekend is over, and not a moment too soon.  I felt like every time we had a party, I got another year older. It actually started with our night out for drinks on Thursday. Then there was a girls-only lunch on Saturday (lots of fun...we had the room at the restaurant to ourselves), and a dinner at one of my brother's on Saturday evening. Finally finished with a family dinner at home on Sunday (I cooked so I could be sure I got just what I wanted). Both my children were on hand...a rarity these days.

Shirlann...I am so envious of your trip. Those pictures are so intriguing...I'd love to know the story behind them, you, know, about the people and their lives.

Sue, kudos to you for your attitude. I wrote something on another thread that I think applies. Most of the data that they use for our prognosis is based on information gathered twenty years ago...well before the advent of much of the current meds. To put it into perspective, they were just starting to use tamoxifen, and it still was kind of experimental. My mother, who had bc then, was taking it, and I remember her onc saying they had great hopes for it.

Twenty years from now, they will be using the data gathered from our course of treatment to establish new prognoses and I'm sure we will push the percentages way up.

Lisa, thinking good thoughts for your US. 

Ulla, As everyone has said, the nail thing is an se of the Taxotere. I'm taking it now as part of my TAC (tx #3 coming up Thursday), so it's interesting (and a little disturbing) to hear that these things can come weeks after the tx has ended. But I guess, something like a nail, which grows so slowly, will be the last to show the effects. My nails have never been in good shape...they are brittle and tend to peel anyway. Turning black and falling off will likely be in my future, too, but I have a long way to go before this is over.

Karen, that video was just too moving. So poignant. And a sad reminder for those of us going through chemo that there is a double edge to this sword.

Ulla

dear nancy and all sisters..i know that the nail thing is one of taxotere SEs as my chemo nurse told me,,i just felt so disapponted wen see my nails detached one by one and look so ugly after i thought that i survived this SE,,i hope u understand my furtration,,its just the dissapointment feeling wen u think that u r done and finished everything then u discover that u r not finished yet,,,grrrrrrrrrr..

beside that it is so uncomfortable to walk and excersize with such nails...grrrrrrrrrr

sue i need u to scream at bootface with me,,i feel better wen hear u attacking it,,,help sister...

my arm and under arm swollowed again ,,may be becoz i didnt excersize or swimm in weekend??

well need to study some stupid swedish,,,i dont feel it as a language by itself,,its closer to be SWENGLISH,,,

I FEEL CONFUSED,,GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Ulla

dear nancy and all sisters..i know that the nail thing is one of taxotere SEs as my chemo nurse told me,,i just felt so disapponted wen see my nails detached one by one and look so ugly after i thought that i survived this SE,,i hope u understand my furtration,,its just the dissapointment feeling wen u think that u r done and finished everything then u discover that u r not finished yet,,,grrrrrrrrrr..

beside that it is so uncomfortable to walk and excersize with such nails...grrrrrrrrrr

sue i need u to scream at bootface with me,,i feel better wen hear u attacking it,,,help sister...

my arm and under arm swollowed again ,,may be becoz i didnt excersize or swimm in weekend??

well need to study some stupid swedish,,,i dont feel it as a language by itself,,its closer to be SWENGLISH,,,

I FEEL CONFUSED,,GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Ulla

REPEATED POST,,SORRY..

OH DEAR NANCY PLZ FORGIVE ME AS I JUST FORGOT TO WISH U A HAPPY BIRTHDAY HONEY..PLZ FORGIVE ME...

I AM REALLY SO CONFUSED..

I LOVE U SISTERS

Anonymous

How Cow Ladies!!!!!!!!! I didnt have the chance to read here over the weekend and you all were so chatty!!!!!! I cant read back right this mintue as Im at work, but wanted to tell Karen, CONGRADS on finishing rads..I know Im about a week late....

Sheila-wonderful about your calendar

Shirlann-looks like your vacation was a blast

Ulla-your story about 911 and all the things you went through were bone chillling for me, but they have made you the strong woman you are!!!!

Happy late b-day Nancy!!!!!

Crap, I cant remember any of the other things I read......I will be back later to try to catch up on reading....all you that I have not mentioned please forgive me, I havent forgotten you Im promise....

Love and Hugs

Jule

my3girls

Ulla...I know you are fustrated that you are experiencing these last s/e from the chemo.  I am sorry for that...and I would be upset too!  WE HATE YOU DARN NASTY BOOTFACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! First my good news.  I had a bone density test done last week.  My ob today said...my bones look great!! She said, very healthy...way above where the need to be! So, that was good! Then I had my vaginal ultrasound.  She wanted to see why I was having that pain in my right side, and how my uterus was looking.  Well, I have 2 small cysts on my left ovary. She was not worried about those, but she said, they could be causing the pain on my right side. (sometimes the way it's transmitted to the brain it works that way.)  Then she said the numbers for my, I think she said thickness of my uterus, was not where it should be, and she wanted to see if it was not endometrial Hyperplasia.  So she did a biopsy right there in her office.  It wasn't too bad.  But now I have to wait about 5 days for my results. GRRRRRRRRRRRR.  So here I wait.  I hope and pray that it is nothing.  I know being on tamox, can thicken the uterin wall.  Well, I am not going to worry.  I will wait to hear what the biopsy shows.  It's cold here!! BRRRRRRRRRRRRRR....just for a few days...then it should warm up. Welcome Kaloni. Ladies, I am going to go finish some cleaning.  Possibly head out for a run or hiking the big hill 10 times.  Can't decide..haha. xoxo Lisa

honeygirl

Oh Karen. I couldn't stop crying. After everything we go through. My heart is breaking for her. Man , this just sucks so bad. She looks so full of life. Like she could give this world a run for its money. And now she has three weeks to live , or is she already gone? So unfair.

HeatherBLocklear

Ulla, what is your native language? You talk about studying Swedish, yet your name is Swedish and you live in Sweden. I'm really curious!

Hugs,

Annie

PS: The nail thing is distressing -- can you use fake nails?

honeygirl

Hi Kaloni , hope you had a good day today. How long will you be laid up with your surgery? Hope it won't be to long.

Yeah Lucy , where are you? Is that young stud taking up all you're time?! You go girl!

Ulla , hang in there girl. I know this is hard. Feels like a "set back". But it isn't. Sorry its so uncomfortable. You are doing so wonderful getting back into the old you. Don't let this discourage you. Keep putting on the pretty polish , and soon , this to shall pass. Love you sister ,Mel

Hi Sue! Did you get your food shopping done? I know its one of your favorite things to do!lol Hope it wasn't to crowded. Also hope your SEs are letting up some. Sleep tight. xxxx Melody

Hi to Judie , Jane , Jule , Dawn , Wren , Karyll , Lisa , Valsul , AE , UB , Nancy , Shirlann , and anyone I didn't mention. Our list sure is getting long! Love you guys.xxxx

portiasproudmom

Hi everyone!  Hope you're all having a lovely Monday--personally, I HATE Mondays! 

Lisa, I'm so glad your bone density test went well.  I know that's always a major concern after chemo.  A friend of mine, who had Lymphoma, told me that her bones are much more weak and fragile now than they were before her treatments.  She's such a skinny little thing--she already looks like you could snap her arm without much effort.  Sorry that you have to play the waiting game yet again with the whole uterine thing.  I'll be praying that you get good results. 

Welcome, Kaloni!  Good to see you here.  You're always so sweet and supportive of the newbies on these threads. 

Nancy and Mel--I know!  That video was a total tear-jerker.  I don't know if she's passed away yet or not.  It's horrible that bootface takes such young, energetic women in the prime of their lives.  Very sad.

Well, I'm off.  My dh should be home any minute.  We're meeting his dad for dinner.  He's on his own tonight--my MIL is visiting her mother in Oregon.

Love and hugs to everyone.

Karen

geebung

Ulla - so sorry you have this latest s/e sneak up on you like this - just when you were feeling it was all over. It must be so frustrating for you. And I can imagine your toenails hurt when you walk - that's horrible too. I remember a few of the women in my support group last year had black toe/finger nails and expected to lose them.

Shirlann - loved your photos! What an experience - you are very adventurous. You will have great memories!

Karen - that video was so sad. What an amazing woman - so dedicated to her dog and really enjoying the moment. I don't know how she can run like that when she is so sick - she must have such a wonderful spirit. I wonder how she is right now...

Lisa - all my best thoughts and prayers for your u/s results. Another darned wait for results - you've had enough of that to last you a lifetime. It's sure to be nothing but the waiting is no fun. I'm so glad your hair is looking great - can't wait to see some pics!

Wow Nancy - you certainly had a birthday blast! Great to hear that you had a good time.

Hi Jule! How's your Libby? (I hope I haven't got mixed up here - you are the one with the new dog, aren't you?)! Would love to see some pics of her.

Hi Mel! Hope you are having a good sleep! 

Hi also to Annie and Kaloni - lovely to hear from you both.

Karen, how are you feeling a few days post rads? You will probably be tired for a while so don't push yourself too hard. You have fought stinking bootface so well and now your experience will help newbies here. You are wonderful! 

Sue - I hope you are getting some sleep! When is your next day off? I'm so glad you like your homies! Nice people make such a difference. I just hope your employers aren't working you beyond what you can stand.

Lucy - hope you are having a wonderful time with your guy - come back and say hi sometime!

Hi also to AE & UB, Valsul, Wren, Sheila (pin-up girl!), Mia, Dawn, Judie and everyone.

Love to you all.

Jane, xxxxx 

Ulla

ha ha ha ,,dear annie..

i know that i have a swedish name ,,(i didnt knew that be4 i came here to sweden since one year exactly,today is my 1st unniversery in sweden),,

my mother language is arabic,,i am from baghdad/iraq..and me and DH r permenantly residents here since 1 year,,,

i am studting swedish language as i must have svenska B before i can take the tests to qualify my BDS(bachelor ofdentistry and dental surgery)

i was banned of going to school or being under any more sterss ,,my onk.said i have been passing through so so so much and she cant let me go to school and take all these tests when i was having my chemo...

i love this country more and more day by day,,

i was so shocked when everyone was telling me that i have a very common swedish name ,,,i couldnt believe how the  stupid man who wrote my name with wrong spelling in my passport  change my name to be a swedish name,,smiles...

anyway thank god he wrote it wroung as if he did it in the right way as we used to spell it in iraq it would be a swedish name also ,,BUT JUST A NAME FOR MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!(OLA)ha ha ha...

in both ways it seems i cant be anything else but SWEDISH lol lol

dear sisters,,,

i love u so much...

dear lisa,,i hope ur results come back normal..i know that tamoxifin cause thickenning in the utrine walls,,so i feel evrything is going to be ok..

god karen,,u broke my heart with that movie,,i felt like its me who is going to die withen 3 weeks,,its so hard,,,

sweety sue,,honey,,wer r u ..i hope u feel better..

to all my dear sisters...hugs with much love 

Ulla

oy,,dear annie i forgot to answer ur q,,no i dont like faked nails,,they cant be helpfull in my feet with the trainning shoes and everything else ,,i still have my hand nails but they look really ugly,,booohoooo

r u in sweden??how did u knew my name is swedish??

am curiose tooo....lol lol lol

Shirlann

Hi my dear sisters, that monkey is a sloth!  haha,  But they look alike, hairy and long arms and legs.

The people we met along the river were fine.  They even had a school.  There are plenty of fish and fruit, so they seemed to be doing well.

In Manuas, which has 2 million people and is 1300 miles up the Amazon, the people work in over 400 foreign factories, they make electronic parts mostly (according to our guide), but also Harley-Davidson parts and get this, one factory turns out 3000 Honda motorcycles A DAY!  This area seemed pretty good.

But I just finished a book called "The Modern Slavery Trade" and they had a chapter on southern Brazil and it went like this.  People come in big trucks to the small villages, which, according to this author are practically starving and offer jobs to the men.  Many of them accept.  They then drive them to a restaurant and they can eat as much as they want.  Then, they drive them many, many miles into the middle of the rain forest.  Here they are worked like slaves, far from home, they don't even know where they are, making charcoal from the trees.  Which is a dangerous, hard job, especially since there is so much rain.  Then the men find out they OWE this company huge sums for the trip, the food they ate at the restaurant, the tools they must use, the huts they live in, and at the wages they pay them, there is no hope of paying off the "debt" they owe the managers.  AND they can't run away, they don't even know where they are and the jungle, you could not survive.  Pretty glum and depressing.  I kinda thought that South America was doing better than this.  But along the Amazon, the people were educated, friendly, well fed and appeared to like us. (Unlike most of the world)  The last time we were in Amsterdam, my son and I, we went into a restaurant and they never came to serve us.  Europe, I gathered, blames us for the subway attacks in Spain and in England, because we invaded Iraq.  A lot of American tourists in Europe tell the locals they are Canadien.  Sheesh.

So that is about all I know, it was truly a wonderful trip.

Sue?  Are you okay?  I think this is your bad days.  Karen, I couldn't open the post, darn it, I know this computer is just waiting for me to get my addy book all back and then it will crash again.  Grrr.

Hugs to all you dear loves, Shirlann   

portiasproudmom

Hello all my dear friends!  I hope you're all doing well today.  I'm feeling really well.  I'm already feeling much more energetic than I did while doing rads.  The only lingering reminder is this burn under my arm, where I had my boosts.  It's right on my SNB scar, and it's actually turned from red to PURPLE--that's how severe the burn is.  Ouchieeeee!  It hurts like a bugger!  I was naive enough to think I'd be able to wear my regular bras again after finishing rads.  Nope!  I'm still in the sport-type bras.  Sigh......I hate those stupid things!  They squish my poor little boobs to where they look even flatter than normal.  I need my padding and underwire back!

Well, I'll try to bbl.  I have some grocery shopping to do today and Chase's t-ball practice this evening.

Hugs,

Karen