please help

Cathi, I don't know what to say. Did she take out a restraining order on him? After my 1st spouse did the same thing to me in addition to fracturing my sinus and jaw, I went to the magistrate to take out a restraining order and he told me to think about it for 24 hours before signing the order. I didn't go back to sign the order but should have. It would have changed the visitation on my divorce papers, showing that he was violent.

Sheila

Shelia she did not even call the police,  she loaded up the kids and came over here and told him he was to LEAVE - he did and is staying at his brothers, her neck is awful,  I wanted to take pictures, she would not let me, I can not even believe he did what he did, I am shocked too. Forgiveness, I don't know about that as far as I am concerned.  I sure did screw up my DD's.  #2 will be here soon with hers whom I know already I can not stand. AT ALL

Cathi: I have never been in the situation that your daughter has, so I don't know what she is going through or the thoughts that must be racing through her mind or your grandbabies.  Thank goodness, you are there for her.  Hopefully, she will let you take pictures, even if you won't use them right now. There may come a time she would need those pictures. 

Sheila, I am sorry you had to go through that, too.

 Debbie

Oh My!

Nettie- hugs and prayers that you are feeling better!

Barbe- gotta get that stone rollin'!!! I'm sure B52s will help w/stone AND energy levels . Really hope you feel better soon and doc is able to help tomorrow.

Lisa- ack what a weekend. I have been on Femara for 2 1/2 yrs--much of what you have described sounds like se's from the AI you're on. Hope you can get some relief (pm me if you want -- I would be happy to share some of what has helped me over the last few yrs- not perfect but better)

Cathi- I was shocked at the post. As a mom I understand the feeling of wanting to protect our children and live in a fairy tale. My prayers are w/dd and her children. I hope she is able to see what she needs to do w/ open eyes and a clear mind, and pray for the strength to do it. Hugs

Oh, Cathi! I am stunned. You have coped with so much and with an amazing attitude. But this! When does it end? I can imagine all kinds of scenarios that could cause the guy to flip out, but the way he did it is over the top. The good news is that he came to his senses, stopped, and left. I hope he gets some help. Your focus, of course, is your daughter and granddaughter. At the very time you need the most support, here you are being needed in a painful, intense way. No wonder you are fed up with life. Know that you are loved here and that no one needs anything from you right now and everyone is willing to listen. So little, but something. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Cathi)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Judie

Judie- that is a great idea!

Thanks for the welcome back, Ladies.

Cathi, I feel so awful for you, your daughter and your grandchildren.  I'm so glad he left and she did not get hurt worse than she did. (Which is horrible in the first place!)  You should try and take pictures encase you need the in the future.  He could come back or worse, she may want him back and forget what he did to her.  I will keep you all in my prayers.  When you find that fairy tale land, please let the rest if us know, we all want to be there with you.

Take care,

Linda

Cathi, so sorry to hear what happened to your daughter. Hang in ... things have to get better.

Oh, AE!!!! I am in tears. I have no words. You have my constant prayers.

Oh AE!  I'm so sorry that you have to cancel your trip.  I know how much you and UB (and Sue) were looking forward to it!  I will keep you both in my prayers.  I hope the anitibiotics work quickly for you.

HUGS!

Linda

Thanks ladies - keep your fingers crossed the drugs work.

I'll keep you posted.

AE

cathi, what can I say? Violence is never the answer. But counseling is a definite for everybody...anger management for Jacklyn's DH, and something soothing for Jacklyn and the kids. I hope things work out for the best.

AE...what a disappointment! I do hope UB is not terribly sick. Obviously, something is wrong, but I pray that's it's the most minimal it can be.

Off to work.

Oh goodness...So awful to hear about UB! but I am so glad it was discovered before the trip got started. Difficult to be ill some where else, away from all the familiar. Prayers for UB that the drugs work quickly and he is out of danger.

Cathi- thinking of you and dd all night. Hoping things are calmer this morning. Hugs

Hugs for Sue's dad.

My God. I havent logged on for a couple of days and so much bad news!



My cousin and his daughter left last night and there is a ringing silence in the house. It was stressful being upbeat because I am feeling at a low ebb just now, drained of energy and full of self pity, but I really miss them. I am seeing my consultant tomorrow to arrange for an echocardiograph and dates for rads and Herceptrin, then I think I will take a break in Blackpool, seeing family and friends and getting a bit of sea air before the next stage of treatment.



Cathi, I am at a loss for words. what a traumatic time for you, Jacklyn and the kids. On top of her diagnosis, she must be at her wits end. Thank god she has you. I am sure the stress of losing his job, a massive trauma, prompted his outburst. No excuse, I know, but money worries can drive someone insane. Is this an isolated incident? You had some regard for your SIL so I hope something can be salvaged if their marriage was a good one previously. But broken trust is hard, if not impossible, to regain. He had the decency to leave and might be hating himself just now, but Jacklyn has to put her and the kids safety first. What a mess! I wish there were some magic dust I could sprinkle (I keep getting that image in my head these days, about everything) to make things right It just ain't fair that you have all of this on your plate when you have your own demons to battle. I will have prayers said for you. My sister is very friendly with The White Friars, a Monestry. The monks are the kindest, most gentle people imaginable. There are quite a few of you in their prayers! I am 'the auld heathen' of my Irish Catholic family, but I feel better if I have done this. Hope you don't mind.



AE, I am so very sorry that UB has contracted pneumonia. Are the antibiotics oral? Will they delay the chemo? Especially now that it is working well? It seems that they have caught it early, thank god. Sorry you have had to postpone your trip. You must be so disappointed. Do you plan to came over later, once UB has the all clear?



My brother contracted it and it stopped his chemo. His cancer was different, he was terminal, so it was the chemo that was basically keeping him alive. He was very weak when he got it, so didn't stand a chance. That's one of the reasons I have been so sad, it was his 3rd anniversary on the 13th.



Sue, at least you know your dad is in good hands. That's an awful long time to wait for results though. Is there anyone to care for him at home? You might want to contact social services and the Occupational Therapy unit to see if he needs amendments to his house, laundry done, meals being delivered etc There is quite a lot of help out there, but you usually have to seek it out unless you have had a good social worker in the hospital. It's pants when your loved ones are miles away, isn't it? Even a journey of a few hours is too long. At least you'll be able to spend some time with him now you are on holiday. I am to have WTC ended on August 13th, you only get it for 28 weeks, so money will be awful tight. I'll have to find a relatively well paid job pretty damn quick as I have plundered all of my savings. I still have had no word on DLA, though I am assured that I will get it. They are inundated apparently. So many people applying. Think a lot of it is the stress of redundancies and the recession. I have a Welfare Right Officer pushing it for me, she is campaigning for cancer sufferers to be fast tracked. Anyway, additional stress. I have never been in this situation in my life, never had debts, never missed a credit card payment or a loan payment, always had enough to live on and a few grand in savings, so this is new to me. I am tired but can't sleep. Jeez - enough about me!!



Lisa, hope your results are sparkling! Your post always make me smile. Funny, I can't bear the thought of any of you suffering! Any more news on the dating front! 'Fess up!



Barbe, Mick Jagger!!!!!! I've told everyone about it. You should be on stage girl. What are they going to do about it. Don't they dissolve them with some kind of sonar?? My Dear Uncle Peter (He was the spitting image of Sean Connery!) passed 4 stones, 2 of them about 2 cm, and really quite beautiful! My auntie was going to have earrings made of them!! only kidding, but she still has them and they DO live in her jewellery box!! do know that he was in great pain and passing them, well, he claims he gave birth to them!



Och well, I am sorry for the tough times so many of us seem to be having, your kind words always help. I suppose I will just have to adapt to a different kind of "normal", physically, financially and emotionally. I so wish I had my old life back, just one bit of it. I wish I could motivate myself to go to Maggies Centre or the Haven where cancer patients, current and cured, and their families and friends can meet , do projects etc. Maybe I just can't accept that's the new "normal" Once bootface has infected you, it leaves it's mark doesn't it?



OK depressed you gals quite enough!



I will let you know the results of my meeting with Mr Yusef tomorrow, and remind myself - again - that I am lucky to be alive! . I spoke to the registrar before my op and asked him if I hadn't acted would the cancer have killed me and he said "Yes, and probably within a year!". I should be smelling flowers better, water should taste better and I should look at the world in a whole shiny new light. That's the impression I am giving everyone, but inside I am scared, I am still sore, had my bum fluff hair shaved when I got my new Irish Jig, so I'm baldy, my feet are still numb, I still don't have an appetite, though I havent lost wieght (nope, there are no good s/e of this girls bootface), I lack energy, am pessimistic. Not a good look!



Sorry again, so many of you are having a much harder time then me, but this is so cathatric letting this out. I know I am probably depressed, I was following the death of my dad so I know the signs. When I was dx, my doc prescribed an anti stress tab called Lofepramine, I don't know if they are any good, and I havent taken them religously. I will make an appointment to see her next week, need to get the swine flu jab and I'll discuss it with her



Sending massive hugs to you all, and especially to all of you who are toughing this out. My mantra is "this too shall pass".



Love from Scotland



Nettie xx

I haven't checked in for a while. Just scanned the last few pages...I was so sad to read of all the dilemmas and sad things that have happened to many of you.

(((((((((((((((Cathi & Jacklyn and kids))))))))))))))), (((((((((((((((UB&AE))))))))))))))),

(((((((((((((((Sue & your Dad))))))))))))))), (((((((((((((((Barbe))))))))))))))), (((((((((((((((Lisa))))))))))))))),

(((((((((((((((Nettie))))))))))))))) - I am praying for you all and sending my love to you and everyone else here.

Jane xoxoxxo