STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

Anonymous

Thank you jo6359 and DogMomRunner for encouragement.

DogMomRunner, I'm sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. Cancer really sucks! I'm glad to hear that her last days were peaceful and free from pain.

My husband died six years ago after being sick for 14 years. He fooled his doctors by living that long but he walked a few miles every day and ate right, which I really think were the keys to his longer life. In the end, he had in-home hospice care. They did a wonderful job of keeping him comfortable and let us know when death was imminent so our small family could be with him when he passed on to a place where the is no pain and suffering.

bcincolorado

DogMomRunner sorry about your loss. I know it is a loss for you too. I'm glad she was not in pain.

mara51506

Viewfinder, what a wonderful and compassionate thing to do. That kind of help is so much appreciated and takes so much stress off people. As stated above, a concrete way to help people and give back at the same time. Hopefully will help you out as well.

bcincolorado

viewfinder great idea for meals. When someone at church had a massive stroke and was in the hospital we took turns taking food to them so no one had to cook. Eating out is exensive too.

mysticalcity

ctmbsikia - If anyone in this house would have even dared breath a word about my hair coming out around the house or in their food (which it has BTW)--I think I would have dumped whatever they were eating on the ground and stomped on it and gone on strike as far as any meal preparation! I am on "nastyzole" you know. . . .you were far too kind. LOL.

Anonymous

My photography forum virtual friend lost her battle with cancer yesterday. It was announced in the forum. So very sad, even though we expect this. Rest in peace, Olga!

Micmel

viewfinder~I am so very very sorry for your loss!! More than words can ever express! I just lost my father so I amgrieving also!!! Hugs from across the miles.....

Yndorian

My condolences to those of you who have suffered painful losses in this time. I send you hugs with all my heart

runor

Viewfinder, I lost a friend too earlier this month, to pancreatic cancer. I planted a rose in her honour in my garden. Roses don't survive in my garden. They die. So do we. It's a staggering and BIG thing to think about and deal with. I haven't figured out how. I am sorry for your loss. These things strike close to the bone these days.

bcincolorado

I am so sorry for all of your losses. Cancer is terrible for everyone and those left behind.

Anonymous

Thank you everyone for your expressions of condolences and sympathy. I really appreciate it. I do expect my nearby friend do die within a few weeks, if she even lasts that long. She was put in hospice just a few days ago, but she's had a hellava ride getting there.

It's my turn to go over to her home this Monday morning so the husband can get a break and do a little food shopping. As sad as death is, it doesn't really scare me. I've observed several of my loved one die during the past several years. Not fun but an sad fact of life.

jo6359

runor, micmel and viewfinder- all of you have experienced such terrible losses over the past month or so. I wish I had comforting words for you but I find it usually takes time. I am very sorry for your loss.

Micmel

Thank you, to all of you wonderful ladies.

Yndorian

RIP EDITH GONZALEZ, great mexican actress and great woman. She was a warrior, cancer sucks!

jo6359

yndorian-Cancer does suck.

Micmel

OUTLOUD!!

DogMomRunner

Thank you viewfinder and bcincolorado. I am sorry that anyone has to go through the loss of family or friend to cancer. I know that death is an inevitable part of life but sometimes that's hard to take in. What helps is knowing that they are no longer in pain

mara51506

I total agree DogMomRunner, my mother died in January from lung cancer. Even while she was so sick, she not only dealt with her own suffering and pain, but she never stopped worrying if I was alright. She would go to bed in her hospital bed in the living room and I could hear her asking if I was alright in her sleep. I think my original cancer diagnosis back in 2015 and then the stage IV took a very bad toll on her health. When she died, she was no longer in pain and no longer had to worry about me. I take comfort in that if I start to feel sad about her.

Anonymous

mara51506, a loving mother always puts her children before herself, not matter what the ages. I'm sorry that your mother had to suffer so much. She is pain-free now and finally at rest. May God give you peace.

jo6359

mara- How beautiful. Through the very end your mother's main concern was you, her daughter. Through her own pain and suffering her main concern was that you are all right. Beautiful

mara51506

Thank you jo6359 and viewfinder. I agree, she really was a wonderful mother to me. I am glad she is no longer suffering like I said and when my time comes, I believe I will see her and my father again. That does make me feel better too.

DogMomRunner

Oh Mara, I am sorry that your mom went through all of that. Worrying about you while she was sick. I hope you get to see her again.

Yndorian

Mara sweetheart: hugs to you.💕

Anonymous

I'm grieving the loss of my virtual friend who died just a few days ago. Today I visited my other friend who has been in hospice since two days ago, who had a 10 year battle with cancer in all parts of her body. Their journeys are similar in so many ways but also dissimilar.

I hope you don't mind me posting this. I just don't know what to do with myself.

Micmel

post all you need to post. I watched my father for seven months in hospice. It was a gift but horrible to witness. Life is wonderful, but no body ever prepares you for losing someone or losing our health. We all must grieve our own way. We are here, we are here! I understand...because I am going through my own grieving and it never gets any easier to understand. Cancer or any disease that takes someone we love, living life is a wonderful thing. But when we have to say goodbye to someone we love. It just isn’t able to be processed. Sending you hugs and support.

jo6359

viewfinder- post and vent all you want. You have been through so much lately. We can still be empathic and also a little scared. Micmel has been through her own personal struggles as well as dealing with her father who passed away recently. I can only speak for myself. I don't care what stage of cancer a person is in when we see or hear about someone we care about dying from cancer a thought always pops in my head "is this going to happen to me" maybe it's just me because it's only been 18 months since I've been diagnosed. But there are times I find it frightening as hell. And yeah, cancer does piss me off. Most of the time I don't think about my cancer but yeah when I have friends dying from cancer and hear about virtual friends dying from cancer it does make me think about my own longevity. I don't dwell on it but I'm not going to lie and say I don't occasionally think about it.

AliceBastable

Besides the one friend I recently lost who I had known for years, the woman who was a mutual friend and a mentor to me through this whole cancer adventure - at least the two most recent ones - has stage 4 ovarian cancer. The friend we lost died on her own birthday. When the mentor friend's birthday came up the next week, I had about an hour where I was frozen in terror before I could send her a birthday greeting, thinking I'd lose her, too. I know it's inevitable, because she's had to give up on many treatments lately, but NOT YET. Even if she's getting ready to go, I'm not ready to lose her.

And then I don't know what to do with my awkward, inadequate feelings, like when the friend who recently died and other friends posted on Facebook (which is how most of us stay in touch) how much cancer sucks, and how they hate cancer - but none of them have had it. I get so tempted to say something flippant like "No shit, Sherlock." Or "Duh, it sure does." What the hell's the etiquette for that situation? It's hard to put our own cancer on the back burner when losing a loved one brings our feelings right to the front. And although I haven't needed chemo for any of my cancers, and friends and relatives see me as cured and over it (partly my doing because I've encouraged that), deep down I know that one of the cancers I've had, or a new one, will probably bite me in the butt someday.

Vent over. For now.

ctmbsikia

My condolences to all of you with your recent loses. jo6359-like your post. I feel much the same way.

I am super annoyed with this whole process/protocols. June was my MRI and BS appt. month. I have a 1cm enhancement on MRI which is a seroma. Got it from exercising. Doing what I'm supposed to be doing! While I am glad it's nothing, it's annoying. It hurts like a pinch at times and I just don't like feeling like something is in there! I've been wearing a bra 24/7 which annoys me but it's more comfortable that way. BS said she did a lot work in there and to take some Advil after classes!! Then, since this BIRADS 3 score the recommendation is a 6 month follow up, so she wrote the orders for the MRI AND a mammo. Does this seem ridiculous? Overkill? WTF? Lastly, she sort of reprimanded me regarding a note she read from the MOs office. I simply asked them if I could come back in December when I can have another DEXA scan and they wrote it like I was not coming back. Jesus. When I got back to work yesterday I did call and make an appt. for Sept. with the MO. That's 6 months from last visit (Mar). They will call me if lab work is needed as I don't have an order for any. To make things more annoying I do have a lab work order from my primary who I will see in October. If MO and primary both order I will have some duplicate bloodwork done within 30 days of one another. How do you all cope with this?? Is it possible my insurance will deny a claim? Should I ask them to share?? To close this rant the only way I see this working between these Doctors is that any tests MO wants done (namely the DEXA) should be pushed 3 months into 2020 since I go back to the BS in Dec.

PS-Thank you for listening/reading. I worked as a coordinator in a previous life for years and when I can't figure out how things work to bring it all together it raises my stress level. At least I've recognized this as a trigger, well my daughter did.

edwards750

I’m betting insurance will deny coverage. They are sticklers for tests, etc being on the exact date you are entitled to and not one day sooner. These doctors frustrate me with scheduling superfluous appointments and meds because what the heck they don’t have to pay for them and if you decline either they are taken aback. After all their’s is the last word and gospel of course. Not.

Diane

bcincolorado

If you get problems you may be able lo get your doctor to appeal. Some docs will fight the insurance companies and some do not want to take the time to do it.