My mom died..

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Sleeping late and watching movies are my daughter's favourite pass time.

    Do you plan on watching the Olympics Kate? The opening ceremony is on tonight. I can't wait to watch it.

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  • AnnNYC
    AnnNYC Member Posts: 4,484
    edited February 2010

    hey Kate, so good to hear from you.  I'm glad you have a little time off from school -- sounds like you're taking good care of yourself by sleeping late, and staying up late with movies.  And homework, because that's who you are!  ( I can tell!)  Sending you lots of hugs and best wishes, hopes that this week off will be restful and restorative for you.

    Ann

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate,

    I hope you have a good break.  Try and keep busy.  Do you have any friends that you can do things with over your break?

    Enjoy your break.  Try and stay busy and do things that teenagers like to do...stay up late and sleep late!!

    Take care and please let us know how your vacation is going.

    XOXO

    Linda

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate,

    Enjoy your break!  Good that you have a plan to keep busy.

    Don't forget to squeeze a little sightseeing in while you are not so busy with classes.  The whole idea of studying in a foreign country is to get to know that country.  You might be surprised that some of your classmates may not have seen all the local sights, so asking them to go with you may give them a chance to see something new, or to share something that makes their locale special with you.  It's not just the big tourist areas, every little place has some local gems tucked away.  Finding those gems is one of the benefits of living in a place, not just visiting for a few days.

    Let us know what you find.

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  • MBJ
    MBJ Member Posts: 4,352
    edited February 2010

    Hello Kate,

    I saw your post and my heart went out to you.  It isn't easy being so young and away from those you love and to lose your mother at such a young age!  I lost my brother who was a year and a half younger than myself when I was 23 and I was devastated.  I ended up getting counseling because I couldn't eat or sleep for months after he died.  It is so important to reach out to others and you will be amazed, just as you have reached out to us on this site, at how others who feel your pain will gather around you to support you and help you with your loss.  Get counseling--I have had problems on and off for years and I am in counseling now and it really helps to find someone you can just talk to and get things off of your chest.

    Hang in there and be very gentle and good with your self.  Healing takes time and allowing yourself this time will make all the difference in feeling better.

    I am sending you a very big hug!

    Mary XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate, when I was a teen I would sleep until 11 or noon and then go to bed around 3 am so I can relate. 

    You might find it helpful also if you share with us what it is that you want.  Like how you would like to see all this play out or what you wish.  We can't bring your mom back but talking it out in words here might help you to focus on your next steps.

    Prayers and HUGS coming your way.

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  • Annie62
    Annie62 Member Posts: 1,081
    edited February 2010

    Kate,

    I just saw this post. A little late I know. I have an old friend from high school/college years (we are 47 now). Her mom died of bc when she was 15 before I met her. I met her a few years after that. I look back now and realize how unhappy she was. We spoke after my dx and she opened up to me. She was sooo down about her mothers long illnes and death. Her dad, whom she loved, was an alchoholic. Her sibs were much older and out of the house. Today she is a happy cool woman living her dream of being a radio producer. She has a long time partner and a beautiful little 10 yr old girl. She is happy. There is so much too look forward to in life. It didn't seem it that way 25+ years ago to her. 

     I hope her story helps you.  I'll be thinking of you.

    Best,

    annie

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Kate,

    How are you doing today?  I hope you are busy having fun.

    Linda

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate

    Just checking in to see how you're doing. Did you sleep in? Did you watch any good movies today?

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  • KateDa
    KateDa Member Posts: 34
    edited February 2010

    Hi everyone

     I was so bored yesterday. Had nothing to do that I ended up doing homework. A bit down lately too. Anyway today i'm going out to one of my senior's house.

    Patoo - all that you all are doing here is more than I can ask, but you know that the only thing I really want is my mom which cannot be taken back ever again..

     but thank you so much for everything

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Great to hear from you Kate.  Sorry that you had a boring day yesterday.  At least you got some homework done.

    Have fun today at the seniors house.  I hope you have a lot of fun.  Log on later and tell us about it.

    HUGS

    Linda

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate

    Hope today was a little less boring for you and that you had some fun.

    Just wondering what a 'senior' is? Is it an older student that acts like a mentor?

     Mich

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  • KateDa
    KateDa Member Posts: 34
    edited February 2010

    I had a good time, didn't want to come back to be alone. *sighsss*. We had some kind of Korean style Shabu, and ice cream.

    Mich- yep, senior is an older student.

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Glad you had fun!!  When can you do that again?  Did you make any friends while you were out, perhaps someone you can see while you are on vacation?

    Do they match the freshmen up with seniors?

    Thanks for checking in with us.

    Linda

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  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,335
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate....just chiming in here as this just kinda hit me when I was reading all the posts.  You said you and your mother used Skype......would you consider maybe using it to talk to one of us ladies?  Do you think that would help to just have a skype buddy?

    Just a thought that might help you......I hate the fact that you are feeling all alone.

    Hugs sweetie

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  • sweatyspice
    sweatyspice Member Posts: 922
    edited February 2010

    KateDa -

    I spoke to my friends in the UK, made some phone calls, and found some local resources for you.  I'll send you a PM with the details.

    And you'll always be welcome to talk with us here!

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  • Gabrielle
    Gabrielle Member Posts: 73
    edited February 2010

    Hi sweetheart,

    Just one more hug from anoher "mom" --  I wish you much comfort and peace. 

    Hugs,

    Gabrielle

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate

    Happy to read that "sweatyspice" has sent you some information about resources in the UK.....please reach out and grab hold of this support Kate. Also, just wondering if your "senior" is someone you can talk to?

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate,

    How are you?  Did you look into any of the info that sweatyspice sent you?

    How is your vacation going?  Have you done anything?  I hope you got to go out with your senior again, you seemed to enjoy that.

    Check in with us sometime.

    Linda

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Hey Kate...it's been a few days since we've heard from you. Hope that means you're keeping busy this week. Keep in touch.

    Mich

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  • lolla
    lolla Member Posts: 1
    edited February 2010

    dear kate,

    I know what is your feeling,because my mom died because breast cancer as well.It was 18yers ago...when I ws 7yrs old...For me,you are still lucky because you had spend time with yr mom,and you huge your mom for 18yrs....and only know my mom for 7yrs...but until now I still can remember her face..and smile.

    Girl..you need to be strong..God is just testing you...God want to see how strong you are...If someone ask you.."are yo ok?'...just answer...'im cool...' even in you heart is sad,

    Please...don't ever feel 'DOWN"...Every people will die one day..Our mom was so lucky because the God choose them to go to heaven earlyer then us..

    NOw..we are same...no mom beside us..but remember...they always keep looking us from heaven to see how strong we are...So..Kate..as I told you..Strong girl...Don't bother what people say...keep your smile...n study hard for yr mom..Cheerup...go for outing.n make yrself bz with your friend ya.....muaxxx!

    love;

    azu(sorry..i'm not very good in english..huhuhu)

    I

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  • KateDa
    KateDa Member Posts: 34
    edited February 2010

    Hi

     I went into London for two days and I couldn't use the internet.

    This week has been terrible actually

    and I feel like it is getting worse

    I just suddenly want to cry most of the time lately

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2010

    Vacations, as wonderful as they may be, can throw us for a loop.  Routines give us structure, and a form of emotional comfort.    When that structure is gone, we can flounder a bit.  That isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it can be unnerving, especially if we don't expect it to happen.

    You also lost your Internet connection for a couple of days, and with it, your support connections.  You're connected again. 

    What were some of the things that you saw while you were in London?

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  • Kyta
    Kyta Member Posts: 713
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate....I totally agree with PatMom's post about routine. It's not surprising to hear that this week has been difficult for you. Hang in there girl....Monday is right around the corner. I hope you have some interesting classes. I just spent the last 3 days in a course...the prof and material were beyond boring...hope your teachers are better :)

     I'm also interested to hear about London....tell us more.

    Mich

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  • spar2
    spar2 Member Posts: 6,827
    edited February 2010

    Kate, thinking of you and wishing I could talk to you in person and give you a big hug.  You know what you have now, you have a bunch of moms here.  We all care about you.  It will take time but it does get a little easier each year.  Keep your mom close in your heart.  You never know what turn your life will take around the next corner.  Your mom, all moms, want their child to be happy even if they aren't physically there anymore.  She will want the best for you, that is why she wanted you to take this scholarship.  Hang in there sweetie, one thing about life is it is always changing.  Good things will happen.  Know we are all here for you.  Sending you big hugs.  Sherry

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Thanks for that post Lolla.  I'm so sorry about your Mother too, but it sounds like you turned out to be a wonderful caring young lady.  I know Kate will too.

    I agree with the routine thing.  I hope you are feeling better next week when you are back in school keeping busy.

    How was London?  I went there once when I was about 16 and loved it.  I loved Harrods!  What did you do while you were ther?  WHo did you go with.

    Hang in there honey.  We are here for you.  Remember, like Lolla said, your MOm is looking down upon you, make her proud!

    XOXO
    Linda

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  • debbie6122
    debbie6122 Member Posts: 5,161
    edited February 2010

    Dear Kate- So glad to see you are back posting again , I was getting worried about you, It seems you have a bunch of "second Mother hens" watching over you, we love ya kate hang in there

    hugs, debbie

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  • KateDa
    KateDa Member Posts: 34
    edited February 2010

    Hi

    I went to London for a seminar the embassy arranged for students.

    I hate London actually, too crowded, people are always in hurry :)

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Sorry you don't like London.  At least it was something to do.  Were you with friends?  I hope there was some fun involved!

    We are having a 50 degree day here in Boston. It's beautiful!

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited February 2010

    Hi Kate!

    Are you back in school?  I hope things are going better for you.  I think about you alot.  Hang in there and check in every now and then.

    XOXO

    Linda

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