Lets start another story, please? I'll start.

spar2

I can lay kippy down in the back seat, put the blow up doll in the front seat and drive up to delaware without anyone being the wiser.  When we reached the safehouse......

LUVmy2girlZ

I felt just that "safe" with Kippy and the blow up I was not alone!  I walked in and it smelled like..........

snowyday

burned electronics.  I must have dumped my latte on the blowup doll I wonder if anyone followed us to the safe site and if they have I will have too...

Anonymous

...she left a note saying that she too feared for her life. She went on to say...

LUVmy2girlZ

she felt like she was being watched all the time.  Even when she was in her own home she could hear.............

evilelf

someone talking or was it noises that sounded like voices or was it one of her dead husbands (notice I said husbands in the plural)coming back to life to......

LUVmy2girlZ

haunt her with their fat bellies, or balding heads or or their gas attacks!  She wasn't going to take this anymore so she had a say-ons ( sp ?)she lit candles everywhere and began chanting............

Harley44

...suddenly, a DEEP voice shouted:   "Why are you bothering me?  I thought I killed myself to get away from you, but now here you are badgering me again!" 

Just then...

spar2

the lights came on and there was my last ex saying he had been watching and following me because he was still in love with me.  He said this was the only way he could get my attention and make me listen.  So I ....

LUVmy2girlZ

quickly blew out my candles and threw the wax candles at him, only he smiled and said, oh I remember............

WellWater

when you would drip hot wax on me while we were making mad passionate love....I said you cheating bastard - that wasn't ME who dripped wax on you - I was the one who bonked you on the head when you came home smelling like candle wax.....he smacked his forehead and said..................

evilelf

Damn, I could have had a V-8 but instead I get...........

WellWater

V.D!!!!!  I grabbed Kippy and the blow up doll and we hightailed outta there.  On our way to...............

Calypso

the local psychic (whose name, ironically, was Kippy of the Kards) to have my palm read.  She took one look at my hand and turned pale and whispered...

Harley44

...I can't tell you your future, but... You have had breast cancer!

I said, "what gave it away... my bald head?  THIS IS A RIP OFF!  I want my money back!"   Then, I ...

WellWater

wrapped my bra (which I can no longer wear due to rads) around her neck and grabbed my five bucks, Kippy, the blow up doll and the psychic's dog name Dippy and we all headed for.............

kbugmom

Jerry Springer show to tell this story. Imagine my surprise when he said........................

WellWater

"your story is not weird enough - go find some moms who are sleeping with their daughters' boyfriends and maybe we can get a show going".....why the nerve of him - after we were escorted by security off the set we found..............

LUVmy2girlZ

( LOL...gosh I gotta get back in here...these are funny ! )

The Oprah show, so I brought Kippy, Dippy and the blow up doll, only no 'pets' were allowed so we headed for Martha Stewart's set,  Martha looked in the audience and said...................

WellWater

"hmmmmm, I see a blow up doll that I can turn into a pair of kitchen curtains and if I could find a dog, I'd show you how to make Diggy Doggy Stew"...Yikes, we were outta there in a flash.  We made it to the homeless shelter, I dropped off Kippy, Dippy and the blow up doll, made my exit, stole a Jaguar and was soon on my way to..........

Anonymous

California. Hollywood that is...to put my creative talents to good use. Once I get there I will immediately....

LUVmy2girlZ

take a picture of me and my "hot" car next to the Hollywood sign and look into getting another boob job!  They know what they are doing in California ...I thought my doll was "plastic" you can get anything you want here even......................

kbugmom

Even able to trade doll in for a newer one. this one is edible and will help when i have no food. so i need to find a place to live but where will it be.........

LUVmy2girlZ

LOL...funnny!

I could go towards the beach or the....gosh that doll does smell good...raspberry truffle!  I started to devour my edible doll in my jag when all of a sudden...................

kbugmom

A cop pulls up and gives me a ticket for the doll not wearing a seat belt. I begin to cry does not work so then i.............

spar2

began to flirt and offered him a bite of my raspberry truffle doll.  He immediately ordered me out of the car and told me to put a finger on my nose and walk a staight line.  I guess he......

WellWater

thought since my one boob was bigger than the other I'd tip over.  When I did he put me in the backseat and off to jail I went - got into central booking and who did I run into but.....................

LUVmy2girlZ

Martha Stewart !  She was just smiling saying " Now, THIS isn't a "good" thing."  I said I was framed, I had a "handicap" as my equilibrium is waaaaay of ( I can relate w/ the boob  ) and she smiled and said...................

Calypso

"not to worry, here is your onc come to bail us out, and he's brought a coconut cream pie with him!"  We all held hands and danced merrily out of the jailhouse, only to be stopped dead in our tracks when Martha realized in horror that...

LUVmy2girlZ

the coconut cream pie wasn't made with organic coconuts!  You should have seen the woman's face!  We left her behind as she starting sitting in a catatonic position rocking herself singing Kuum-ba-ya my Lord then.................