You know you're a cancer patient when....

kittycat

Awww... Lady Madonna!!!  You are a soul sister for sure!!!

When you and your BC sisters consider the idea of taking off your wigs in a nice restaurant, just to see the reaction of the other diners! 

kittycat

when you get a little worried when the wind starts blowing! 

gsg

when you've poo'd blue and peed red.....................and you're not a yankee doodle dandy.

Faith316

I love the new word ---- chemotardedness.  That's going into my personal vocabulary!

You know you're a cancer patient when you buy band-aids in bulk because of the hand/foot syndrome.

mumito

OMG when you walk into your patio screen door,which is what I just did.

lorrhaw

I love this thread and keeping coming back to it.  As somebody mentioned we should all get together and publish a book because some of these things are so funny.

Kittcat and Ladymadonna - did you guys really close down the restaurant the other night?  I am so jealous that I had to go home and pack.  And yes next time we are really going to take off our wigs in the restaurant, it will be so much fun!

Hope everybody has a great weekend.

weesa

When you search the whole house frantically looking for your purse because you are late to work and the entire time it's been hanging off your shoulder.

squidwitch42

weesa,

LOL, twice this week I have panicked looking for my "lost" phone, while on the phone.  I guess I'll tag that along with yours....

KittyDog

lol weesa....only because I do it all the time with my glasses and they are on my head.

lorrhaw

squidwitch42 - I am still laughing at your post about looking for your phone while you are talking on it.  I have done that a few times BEFORE I even had cancer.  Talk about feeling silly!

Susie123

When you know the Dr (PS) must think you're a big old perv.

Visit 1: When Dr enters the exam room you have a silicone implant in one hand and a saline implant in the other one. (Trying to decide by feel)

Visit 2: Dr enters, you have multiple silicone implants in your hands. ( different sizes )

Visit 3: Dr enters, you have multiple silicone implants under your shirt. ( See how those sizes look on your body)

After Exchange: Dr enters, you have a silicone implant in one hand while you're feeling your foob with the other to see if the feel turned out to be the same.

Susie123

And..when you've become so familiar with the Dr (PS) that you just laugh when...on the morning of my exchange surgery I heard the staff wondering where the Dr was. It was quite a while past my scheduled surgery time. She finally came flying in, threw her purse and keys on the table beside my bed, grabbed the marker and began drawing on my chest as she was apologizing for being late. She went on to say that she went to the wrong place, and as a matter of fact she does that alot. That they use to live north of the hospital and she still finds herself driving on north 400 and thinks, why am I going this way, we live south of the hospital now. Most people would have probably said never mind, if you can't find your way home I really don't want you operating on me. You know you're a cancer patient when that doesn't scare you away!

flopsy

You know you are a breast cancer patient when you are thankful to look like the guy from the movie "HELLRAISER" instead of more like UNCLE FESTER.  Yes, that would be me.

When you think the wind may blow your one last hair out of place.

When you talk about chemo being a freaking gift!!!

All your new favorite books were written by breast cancer survivors and oncologists.

You are getting dressed in the morning and put your new double prosthetic bra on backwards and then consider wearing it that way to onc appt and chemo tx.  Yes, I really did this.  I wonder if anyone would have really noticed.   May still try it.

When people ask how I can look like I still have more boobs than them and I had a double mast.

lauri

...when you look down and your foob is at waist level and all you do is think "good thing I wore a tucked-in shirt so it didn't fall out ... again"

Firni

I have nothing new to add here, but you all make me relax and laugh every day after a bad day at work.  This thread is almost as good as wine.  Except for the prosthesis stuff, I can relate to every single post.  At the time I never thought I'd laugh at this stuff.  Thank you.

Pamelajo

you know you are a cancer patient when you have a "lucky chair" in the infusion center

Claire82

haha

i made someones hubby get out of mine

jenn3

chemobrain in action again.....you know you're a cancer patient when you walk out of the door to head to the grocery to pick up eggs, ask DH what he needs, he asks for Poweraid.  Two things, that's all you need.  Drive to the grocery store and forget where you're going and don't remember until you pass the grocery, double back................then only manage to remember the eggs.

kittycat

when your family is getting used to your meltdowns (like maybe you should schedule it ahead of time)

When a friend sends you flowers because you text her and told her you were having a bad day! 

Lorraine - yeah, we were the last table to leave the restaurant!  LOL!

AussieSheila

......when you are feeding the cat and, after putting his dish down beside the fridge, you are hand-crawling back up to a standing position and the cat gets brained by your foob falling out of your old, soft bra.

Sheila.

AnacortesGirl

..... when you have the pharmacy phone number in your phone's address book.

..... when you can just start punching numbers for the pharmacy and onc's office without waiting for the voice prompts. You can't remember what you went to the store to pick up and you forget things when you get ready for work (mascara, foobs, earings, brushing your teeth) but the phone menu is burned into your memory.

.... when you have to move your tax files to a box to make more room for your cancer files in the file drawer.

.... when you find yourself thinking of new things to add to this thread while in the office "working"!

AnacortesGirl

I think I'm going to put some tape in the car with our other emergency stuff.  I don't car so much if the car breaks down but if my foob springs a leak I want to be ready.  That was a great tip about the emergency on the way to Sturgis.....

dutchgirl6

...when you have to have your blood pressure taken on your ankle because you don't have any "good arms"

Lady_Madonna

...when someone tells you they really like your hair and you can say "thanks, you can have it!" and take off your wig and hand it to them (I've heard the expression is priceless, although I haven't had the nerve to actually do this to anyone yet!) 

...when the entire pharmacy staff knows you by name as soon as they see you.

...when you finally had to explain to the sweet Starbucks guy serving your daily tea what was going on when he complimented you three days in a row for three completely different hair colors and "cuts."

...when you consider getting a medical alert bracelet but then scrap the idea because you can't figure out how to fit everything on there.

...when your new favorite jewelry has a little pink ribbon on it.

kittycat

Lady M- Yes, Amy's bracelet is sooo cute!  (and I had to stop and think of the word "bracelet" - chemo brain)!  LOL!  I like that you had to think of the word "ribs" - that was priceless!!!

kittycat

When you regret taking those Senokot S pills in the morning because forgot you had a birthday party to attend in the afternoon!  Yikes!!!  Maybe I'll just send my DH. 

hymil

AussieSheila, your foob braining the cat is just priceless!!

ruthbru

Just found this....tremendous! How about when your straight hair grows back curly, and you don't know how to answer when the clerk at a store says, "I love your haircut. Is your hair naturally curly?" 

ruthbru

Or how about when your hair comes back, you dye it PURPLE, just because you want to (I did!).

Faith316

Lady Madonna --- laughed hysterically about your giving people your hair comment.  Too funny!