MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

marlegal

Whew....lots to catch up with! Loved reading a bunch of good test results. Belated welcome to a couple newbies, glad you found this thread. I'll try to post more, including big pics, to help get us to 1,000 pages! Using iPad now though so not today! Babysitting grandson...first overnight'er. DD and husband went to a nearby resort for their anniversary. I will be one tired and sore MomMom by noon tomorrow, but treasuring the time with Cole since we don't see him that often. The angel is napping at the moment, testing up so he'll have enough energy to run me ragged later! 

Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend 

Tomboy

i love catfight free zones! 

barbe1958

It wasn't on this thread that I got slammed!! It was probably on a thread talking about mastectomies or the surgical procedure - what to expect, something like that. I wish I'd known before my surgery how relatively pain-free the procedure was going to be! I'd had a horrid experience with my hysterectomy and a pain pump years earlier and was horrified to find out I wouldn't be getting a pain pump with my masts. Turns out that because there are no bones, muscles or organs involved in a mast without reconstruction that it's kind of just like a "really big paper cut" (as per my surgeon). I was pleased and wanted to reassure others that pain was not going to be an obstacle they needed to fear. I know we all feel pain differently, but I have Fibromyalgia which means pain is multiplied 10X and more!!- so to be comfortable enough to leave the hospital without pain meds was a HUGE relief to me.

Anonymous

Barbe, I am amazed by description and pain tolerance! For me, cutting thru the pecs was hardly a "really big paper cut" (3 times) but agreed, never needed the use of a pain pump. I know, I'm a whimp!

Notbuyingit

well, ladies - i will never ask "why me?" and I won't let BC take my life from me in any way without a fight, but i don't think i will ever feel like it was a "blessing". Surely a less drastic wake up call would have been appreciated  

my anger is not that  I have to go through this - but that, after all these years - at least my lifetime - after all the millions of dollars thrown at it -  they have not come up with a better "cure" than this - one that's leaves so many with lifetime scars and side effects. SO many unknowns to deal with - including why 1 out of 8 women are affected. Constantly told that "everyone is different" while undergoing treatment that is based on statistics of how many women reacted the same.

rollercoaster of emotion?? agreed - more tears shed than in my entire 57 years - you better believe it - received wonderful support from family, friends & caregivers? most of the time

but an experience I would have gladly lived without & would not wish on ANYONE

elimar86861

My son and I had an interesting talk the other day.   He reflected that when patients react differently than as expected, doctors are reluctant to see them as falsifying what the doctor has already learned and internalized but rather see the patient as the aberration.  It led to a whole discussion about the "standard of care" being based on statistical results coming up with a concept of "average" patient, but who actually fits the exact statistical mold of average patient?  Very few, if any.

Tomboy

mastectomy withut reconstruction is what i would do, if it ever comes back. because since lumpectomy, and 'tissue rearrangement' there is one rather large lump, way bigger than the cancer itself, under the scar. and the rest of the breast seems to feel really lumpy, too. and i did develop a seroma in the axilla, even before drain was removed, and one in the breast itself too. plus, i think that whatever happened to me, during surgery, all of my muscles were screaming at me. When they said i could go, i tearfully told surgeon that i didnt feel like i could go home in that shape, and she prescribed me pain killers. i did develop LE pretty quickly too. i was a mess. so i was just wondering if there is more pain involved, with a lumpy as opposed to mastectomy. But like Elimar says, who knows? and what is normal? that sounds like a very interesting conversation that you had with your son, i would have loved to be sitting there, too!

barbe, glad to hear that that didn't happen on this thread!

barbe1958

2nd time, why did they cut through your pecs!!! Did you get a TE installed? My comment did say "without reconstruction". There is NO reason to cut through pecs for a modified radical mastectomy.

I never asked "why me?" either. I figured I took one for the team - the team that had daughters and daughters in law in it!! If I didn't get the hit, then one of them might have. As for blessings...NOPE...not me either. Sorry, I appreciated life just like it was just fine thanks. I didn't need a reminder of my mortality to bring me closer to my God or my family!

As for "normal", we know that 85% of all medical data is based on a 40 year old male weighing 170 pounds or something like that. So of course they don't know what to do with us females who know how to describe what's going on in our bodies. I'm sure the medical industry was told that period cramps don't really hurt, either....

lovewins

I saw this on FB and thought of this thread.

I am sorry you had to go thru that Barbe.  One of the best things I like about this place is that it taught me no matter what i was or am feeling it is ok.  I really needed that.

Notbuyingit

barbe, love it! & i am stealing your quote!

good sleep for all!!

Valjean

Just popping in to say Hi as I haven't been here in a while.

Last week Wednesday I had my 6-mo ck-up & I'm happy to report everything is A-OK. I had a good discussion with my Onc & I have decided to remain on Aromasin, possibly for up to ten years. She told me she would have recommended it for a BC patient who is at high risk & even though I am at low risk, I have had few SE's & am tolerating it well. My CA 27.29 was at 13.1 & since I have been in the normal range for this past five years, she does not order that beyond 5 years. She did order an update on my Vitamin D, so I am curious to learn how I have fared the last 1 1/2 years, with Sept 2012 result being 85.4.

I hope this posts for me, after 3 times trying last night to post on another thread, I gave up.

Momine

2nd time, I am also confused about the pecs comment. 

Kathec, I think it varies wildly how you respond to surgery. I also think it depends to some extent on the skill of the surgeon. I had a C-section 20+ years ago, performed by a resident learning how to operate. My recovery was horrible, I developed a massive infection, crippling post-op pain, permanent disfigurement and chronic pain.

My cancer surgeries (surgical biopsy, BMX, hyster) were a breeze in comparison. The hyster surgeon even got rid of the pain and disfigurement from the C-section. My breast surgeon is a perfectionist control freak. It must be hell to be married to him, but I will take him for a surgeon any day. 

Anonymous

oops, have to admit I missed the "without reconstruction" part (that's what I get for posting when I just woke up from a nap!). I did do the recon route, that's what I made a mistake about. 

My first mx was not pain-free! Even though no recon then, it was back before SNB, when they removed all lymph nodes. That was just as painful as the mx (no separate incision, they took them somehow internally from the mx site), so glad they don't do that anymore. 

Sorry, I messed up.

barbe1958

2nd time, thanks for clarifying that. The pain of reconstruction is one of the reasons I didn't go for it. With Fibromyalgia I just can't mess around with anything that might add to my pain load. I have a VERY low tolerance for pain with FM so you can understand my fear, I hope.  As for the SNB, I agree that the node removal area was the most painful! My surgeon says they have to dig around to find the marked nodes, so maybe just getting them out like you did would have been even better!

Footballnut

Good morning all!!!!

This past weekend I went shopping at la vie en rose and bought boobs!!  Lol. My surgeon recommended that I go there to buy bras right now since the forms that come with the bras are very lightweight.  What a great product!  

I'm sitting in my car dealership now getting my car serviced and my boobs are hanging in the bathroom at home because I had to was them. So here I am bring me!!  Lol. Boob free!!

Except that my right boob that never was now is because the skin had stretched due to my years of having an implant. My hubby calls it my moob for mini boob. Lol. 

I seem to be healing well from the surgery. Still a bit of fluid hanging around. My surgeon told meant week if I swell up again to call him so that he can remove more. What I ament with now is not nearly as much as last week so I'm thinking that I should just wait it out 

I meet with a MO tomorrow for a consult. I am now 3 weeks since surgery and am okay. I do get tired if I plan what was a regular day for me - up at 6:30 and go go go

I now find that I am ready to go by 10 or so then still cannot do things as quickly as I had

So we are planning a trip to Montreal and NYC by train which will include some hockey games. Maybe a bus trip to Atlantic city. This should be nice and relaxing because we wont the driving and have no deadlines!!

Hopefully it won't result in delays for treatment. I'll chat with the MO about it. We really need a break!!

You are all wonderful and help to keep me upbeat. I did cry for 5 minutes yesterday. Other than that it's rock n roll!

I've for drafts for 2 songs about this journey which I hope to record at some point. If this ever happens I'll let you know

:-)

Have a great day!!!!!

elimar86861

Val,  We've got a rally going on with all the good results lately on blood tests.  Congrats!  That is a nice high number for the Vit. D.  Do you supplement?  Tanning bed?  Milkaholic?  Can't be because you are a field hand (because that still wouldn't work mid-Winter in MI.)  Tell us your secret.

I briefly ask "why me?"  But then I looked over the list of things that added to risk and hardly any applied to me; and I looked over the list of things to lower risk and I could check off quite a few.  I realized I would not be getting an answer to the question.  For me, I think just the usual being a woman, aging, and randomness were at the root of it.  One in eight.  I felt like I took "the bullet" for seven friends.  Now my best friend is Stage IV.  Between us, does that mean 14 friends are safe?  It sure doesn't seem like it.

Both my friend and I love to collect rocks.  She reminded me that, years ago, she brought back some lava from three different Hawaiian islands for herself and for me.  Supposedly the Hawaiian gods don't like that and you are cursed if you remove them from the islands.  Could that be it?  A Hawaiian lava curse? 

barbe1958

Football, you'll have to correct your DH; MOOBS are man-boobs! Small boobs are booblets. Go on your trip! You don't need the blessing of your MO!!!

e - you'd think the Hawaiian gods would be thrilled that their rocks were being taken as souvenirs...silly gods!

Tomboy

yeah the gods go traveling with their rocks, i think they like it when you take em. i love rocks too.

Anonymous

FBN, thanks for the chuckle and smile! Enjoy your trip!

Just to let you know: it's gorgeous here today so I decided to wash my car - the one my hubby drives (or, after this weekend, POS hubby = POSH). I thought it would be a piece of cake, after all, in 2 weeks it will be one year since TE exchange (with revision on one side in July). Shortly after starting, realized it was stoopid, stoopid i started. Still have T-Rex Syndrome arms, thankfully I have step stools to help, but still lots of pain now. Looks like a recliner day for me! And 10 lashes for being a doormat by doing something nice for him after all the crap I got from him this weekend

Barbe, thanks for the description, 16 years of half-chest (1 foob form)

elimar86861

2TA,  Washing a car?  We have chore boys to do that stuff.  Let me send one your way immediately!

lovewins,  What happened to those PUNS????  They have gone missing.  I love puns.

I'm getting a DEXA (bone density) scan on Weds. just for fun.  It might be interesting because the last one I had, I was menopausal for less than a year and on Tamoxifen.  This one is going to be all me, no additives, no preservatives.

Anonymous

E- laughed so hard I almost wet my pants!!! Thank a million! Next time, will call 1-800-RENTAHUNK! Will be worth every penny!

Also, love the new header

Anonymous

oh, can I share the wonderful photo on:

https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/102/topic...

That's a place to store things we don't want to forget.....

I posted this on another thread this morning:

luvmygoats

Eli - I get bone density next week and full of preservatives. Ought to be very interesting or not. Feeling the Fosamax or Boniva Rx coming my way. Not looking forward to it. I think GERD is a side effect and I have enough of that already.

2TA - hope the recliner day is helping and POSH is keeping his S to himself. I've kinda gotten to the point that I'll offer DH an opinion on something (not life/limb threatening) and when he rejects it I just OK it's your call you get the s**t that comes back from it. On the other hand I need to quit asking for his opinion on minor stuff, not like I'm buying a car or something.

Talk about laughing till they're peeing - Cat in the Hat immed. to my Word files. Thanks 2TA.

We went to out 2x/year camping to OK this weekend and it was just OK. I can only eat so much and don't drink that much. Do like to play games/cards and sit by campfire. Won a trophy (friends own trophy business) for "best story" which turns out I won for feeding hamburger buns to the semi-tame resident Canada goose - female. Not sticking my fingers near male's beak, besides he stood his distance.

elimar86861

luv,  I'll show you mine (results) if you show me yours (results.)  I can't exactly remember what my numbers were last time, and last time was the only other time I got the test so this is going to be the first one to look at any trend I might have going on.  Good Luck next week.

Geese are scary.  Just look at the evilness.

luvmygoats

Oh my yes geese are evil. I can't remember why but MIL had geese when they lived in CA. DH says her poodle learned to poop on the run and some pet (?cat) hid in the cactus, the only place they didn't get. I wouldn't have wanted to tangle with papa goose, I think he would have come up at least to my waist if not a little higher .

My bone density is the 3rd I've had at this place; at least 4th if not 5th I've had. Will get some good trends and the 1st since starting the evil Femara and stopping the Evista which seemed to be helping my numbers. Both my PCP and MO now have online test retrieval, pain in the patootie to set up but done and no longer have to call esp. the MO. I don't remember numbers well just know I was osteopenic but very little changed from the 2 years b4 that. I will wait for my gyn visit 1st of May and get his opinion too. Seems he dispenses bisphosphonates also. He's the one who ordered the other two.

lovewins

I remember going to my Grandpa and Grandma's house when I was a kid and the geese would run free in the yard and every time my Mom would warn me to stay away cause they could beat you to death with their necks!!!!  Not sure if this is true or not though...my thoughts on geese.  They must be evil. 

Footballnut

I can comment on the great Canadian geese. They own parking lots and parks and any streets that they might want to walk on...... Or sit on for that matter

They work better than traffic cops or street lights

Don't mess with the geese!!

They honk and if you get hit by their poop when they're flying you'll feel like ure under attack and run for cover!

Lol

elimar86861

They don't care.  Try walking a dog in their area.  They will boldy advance, hissing their heads off.  What?  Is the bread not stale enough?  Honk, honk, honk!!!  They are very particular about it, but you never bring enough no matter what!  Should your flesh get pinched by one of them...it's hematoma time.  Even one is a terror, but they are always with their gaggle.  Just run.

Tomboy

YaH!!! Meaner than heck! one punched me in the chest with that ugly mug-beak, when i wasnt even two feet tall, at my mom's friends house, and their doberman chased it, till it started chasing him!

Momine

Eli, lovely chore boy. One of my standard lines is that I need a pool, so I will have an excuse to acquire a pool boy.