2005 ROCK-TOBER CHEMO GIRLS
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ok, i too lost an avatar while trying to change it!!
any insight anyone??
Edit: i worked it out!! so for anyone having trouble with avatars - Mary-Anne i know you did - you have to make sure it is max 80x80 pixels, it looks like it wouldnt accept any higher...
there are a few wibsites you can use, i like this one:
www.resize2mail.com -
have a good trip, paula. your hair looks awesome. i'm so jealous you got curls!!!
here's my blog address...i just finished it:
http://360.yahoo.com/amyebeid -
thanks Amy!
just checked out your blog... lovely pics.. you are gorgeous, girl, curls or not!! and your brother is a bit of an all right.. is he taken?? hubby not bad either! -
Amy..great blog!!! wonderful pictures!
Paula..so good to see you again here! My has your hair grown and curled!! You look beautiful!! Great pic of you and your friend, too.
Have a wonderful, wonderful trip. You deserve it!!!
Tracy..good luck today!!! Have you in my thoughts.
Laura..good luck tomorrow!! Will be thinking of you. -
I got up to the Mammography center this morning and they told me that I did not have an appointment. I burst into tears! I really had no idea that I was so anxious about the whole thing, but guess I was since I couldn't hold back the tears.
Next, I went down to the cancer center and they told me that I would also have to reschedule that appt becasue the oncologist is going to want my Mammo results. They were the ones who originally made these appts, they apologized and said that this has happened before and that they have talked to the Manager of the Mammography center and will do so again..
So now I am going Wednesday at 2:00 for both appointments.
The cancer center also told me that there will be no blood work with the 6 month post chemo check up. So, I am going to go ahead and schedule to have my port removed. If the Onc doesn't agree with that on Wed, then I can cancel the appointment.
I should have figured, having appointments on a Monday and all. Mondays are not my best days..... :-) -
Paula, you have so much hair!! Out of control is better than out of your head! Have a great time on your trip.
Tracy, it will be fine! Thinking of you today.
Amy, wow, I can't believe you blogged the whole time. I didn't have the energy or gumption to do it. -
Tracy in Seattle: I know just how you feel. Sometimes the frustration can send you to tears. I hope it goes well for you on Wednesday.
Hey Kelly, how's the belly? Your daughter looks adorable in her fairy costume!
Paula: Have fun in Russia. Who'd have thought that one day we'd say "Russia" and "fun" in the same sentence?
I went to the physiatrist today and he measured my arm. He said the LE is mild and he referred me for therapy. He had some interns doing rounds with him and again I ask, do you have to send pictures in with med school applications these days? These young doctors are all looking like models! -
OMG Tracy! I can't believe that!!! How awful! I hope all goes smoothly on Wed. Will be thinking about you.
Laura...Good luck tomorrow. Am thinking about you!
Ta-dah..you crack me up! But I gotta agree with you. When I had my second lumpectomy, the residents were so darn cute I told my dh to stay in the room with me when they did the breast exams cuz............. -
Hello to everyone! (I'm waving at you here . . .)
Okay, I got back from my CT appointment about an hour ago. I did not expect to have to swallow that barium drink and they did not tell me I should not have eaten lunch. Anyway, since chemo my gag reflex has been oversensitive so I was nervous that I would vomit the barium up, but I managed to get it down without a problem. It didn't taste bad, but I just didn't want to have to take it inside of me. Then they started an IV so they could give me contrast dye in my circulation system. These procedures were necessary to highlight my digestive and circulatory systems for the abdominal CT. The chest CT needs no special procedures. I guess most of you have had these tests. It's just all new to me. Anyway, there I was, thinking how exactly a year ago I was in a building just down the street, a few blocks away, getting the mammo, ultrasound, core biopsy and then the diagnosis. I told the nurse who started my IV about that and she said, "Well, congratulations to you. Here you are and you look good. How do you feel?" She was so nice and I was glad to have someone acknowledge me like that.
Paula: Bon voyage!! Hope you have a great trip! I think your hair looks lovely, although it may not be what you are used to.
Kelly: What a lovely princess you have living in your home. Hope you are feeling better today.
TaDah: Good luck with treatment for your arm. Hope it works quickly.
Tracy: Oh, that is awful about the mixed up appointments. I can relate to your feelings about these mammos. I was also unexpectedly anxious last month before my appointment. When it was over and the radiologist told me "everything looks fine" I had a good cry, tears of relief, in the dressing room. I would have been upset if I had the experience you had today. I am so sorry that you have the added worry.
Amy: as soon as I get this message sent successfully I'm gonna go look at your blog. I kept a blog for some of my experiences also, but at some point just felt overwhelmed and unable to keep it up. Good for you to stick with it.
MaryAnne: Hi, there!!
Laura: Good luck tomorrow. Hope we both get the results we want from these CT scans.
Ravdeb: have you settled back into you regular life yet or is there still a little vacation in you still?
If I missed someone, blame my "chemo-brain" - that's what my husband says when I can't remember things. I do hope all is well for everyone and that you are enjoying a very good day.
Mary -
Amy:
The blog is just great. I'm continually amazed by what a talented young woman you are. It is a priviledge to know you. It seems that we had our surgeries on the same day last year, September 15. I remember laying in the recovery bed thinking, "I wonder how many other women across the country are having breast cancer surgery today?" How amazing that I would meet one of you this way. We have another similarity as well. I have a desire to write about this experience, as well. I admire how you have persisted and kept up with a record of your experience. That is a very fine thing.
Mary -
Marymelodi, guess what? Count me in with you and Amy, my surgery was also September 15th. Good Luck with the results of your scan. I hope you are enjoying your vacation so far.
Amy, I also looked at your Blog and enjoyed reading it. I tried keeping a journal during chemo but never stuck with it.
Tracy, Awwww, that is terrible that they got your appointment all screwed up. I know what the anticipation is like waiting for the appointment's. Thank goodness they were able to get you in on Wednesday. I will be thinking of you.
Hi Laura, I will be thinking of you tomorrow when I am having my port flushed. I still haven't gotten the OK to have it out yet. Make's me wonder!
Kelly, How are you feeling? Once again Teryn is a doll, SO CUTE in her fairy costume.
Paula, Your hair is amazing. It must be all those vitamins you take. Have a GREAT trip...
Graycie -
graycie and mary...so crazy we were having that cancer taken out of us on the same day. we're almost to our one year of being NED
thanks for reading my blog, ladies i'm glad i can share it with you. hopefullly, i can get it published...there's really not anything for young women with breast cancer.
laura...i'm thinking of you for tomorrow. you'll be okay....i'll be sending you positive vibes all day.
tracy...i'm so sorry they got the appt. mixed up. you get worked up and then there it is. that happened to me once and i almost leaped across the desk to kill the receptionist. at least you get to have everything on wed.
paula...seriously...how did you get curls? mine is stick straight!
off to have dinner with my husband. ah, normalcy -
Laura! I will be there with you tomorrow too! Sure hope we all fit in the room! You can just imagine this big crowd of us all standing there to make sure you are treated right!
Paula - Love your hair!
Amy - my hair came back curly too! I keep trying to get it to spike and it won't quite do it right because it is too curly!
Isn't it nice to be back to doing normal things? I hope all of you are just being very normal today....
Love each of you!
tracy -
Paula: How did you get your hair so curly (and dark). Mine's really unmanageably curly, but I always had curls. I used to spend a lot of money straightening my hair. I couldn't stand my grey (hmm, I don't remember having any before chemo) so I used a no-ammonia hair color.
Amy, how do you keep your weight down and still eat out (or eat well) all the time? I was always less than 110 lbs. before the dx, then boom! Now it won't budge at 120!! And I'm only 5 feet even!! Great blog, btw.
Graycie: Worrying does not help. Keep your mind busy. These are words I should have been listening to while I used to worry.
Kelly and Tadah: Thanks for the LE info.
Mary: I have no blog, but I have journal(s) all over the place. Posting on the boards is another way of keeping track of what has happened to me. There are so many things I have forgotten. Going back to my posts helps me remember a whole lot.
Tracy: Sorry about your appointment mix-up. You must have been really anxious. Don't forget to breathe... -
Laura..thinking of you TODAY!
Kelly..how are you feeling?
Paula..hope you are having a blast on your trip!
Amy..I went into your blog, too and it's terrific! Hope it gets published.
I also have kept a journal but not on-line and not daily. tried to save most of it. Have some of it printed up and in a notebook of all my bc stuff (test results, path, etc)and some of it is still on my computer.
For those of you haven't done this, one of my e-mail friends told me to save my e-mails and just put them in my journal because I expressed my feelings about a lot of the stuff that I was going through. So..I still have the e-mails and just haven't gotten around to organizing them. Not sure I feel like rereading it quite yet.
Mary..you are on vacation, right? Enjoy! Glad the CT is over. I hate having to drink that stuff. They made me do that when I was hospitalized and thank goodness they didn't make me finish the entire thing. They told me I was small enough and didn't need as much as others! WHEW! -
brenda,
i got a personal trainer to help jumpstart my exercising right after treatment. so, i got into weight lifting....nothing big....just simple legs, arms. then i got into walking on the treadmill and each month would increase the speed and the incline. then i asked my trainer to get me into runnning. now, i'm on my own working out and i run about 3-4 times a week...nothing serious....i do intervals...like i walk a quarter of a mile, then run, then walk, etc. until i go up to a mile and a half of running and a mile and a half of walking. each week, i increase my speed.
with running, i've noticed a huge huge difference. i eat pretty good during the week and when we go out, i eat fish, etc. on the weekends i eat like crap, but the exercising helps.
see about a personal trainer. i was ugh after chemo...no strength, no energy, no endurance...and 15 pounds overweight. now, i feel stronger in my body than ever! -
Mary..forgot to tell you that I will NEVER get back to my regular routine. Everything about me changed when I was diagnosed on Sept 5th, 2005. I stopped teaching, I concentrated on ME, I became stronger and less afraid (I figure that if I can have cancer, there is nothing left to fear!) and routine/regular is not in my vocabulary anymore!
I have new plans for a business..am working on this now.. and have learned to say no when I want to say no, do things when I want to do them, and just enjoy each day as much as I can!
So, I hope to keep a little bit of vacation in me... always! -
Everyone -
Thank you so much for all the good wishes! I really appreciate it! I just got back from having the Lung CT. I still try to read the faces of the technicians - to try to tell if they saw something questionable. But they were quite poker-faced...darn! They said my Dr. should have the report by Thursday - although I know he's in the office tomorrow - so it's possible he'll get it then. (My dh is home with me today - it's great to not be alone here.) While there I ran into a woman that I went through chemo with. She had breast cancer 5 years ago and was having chemo again for bone mets. When I saw her today she told me she now has mets to her liver as well. Please keep her in your prayers. God I hate this...
Kelly -
How are you feeling - post-oopherectomy? Hope everything's on track.
Brenda -
I'm so glad you got the shirt! No...money is not necessary. My treat! Hope school went well today.
Graycie -
I hope the "flush" went well! Hopefully - soon - they'll flush your port down the toilet! LOL Isn't there a city called Flushing, NY? LOL Did your Dr. tell you the reason he wants it left in? I'm just curious.
Tracy -
I am sorry about what happened yesterday. That really stinks - big time. Best to you tomorrow.
Paula -
OMG - your hair is gorgeous! I think out of all of us - you have the most, the thickest, the curliest! Hope your flights were uneventful.
marymelodi -
Glad your CT went smoothly. As soon as you hear something - please post.
Amy -
Can't wait to check out your blog.
Rosemarie -
Hope everything's going well. I bet you're busy getting the kids ready for back-to-school.
ravdeb, maryanne, debbie, TaDah, chumfry - hey there!
Laura -
Laura - glad the CT is over, it is so hard to wait for results! I have a friend who is pretty sure that her bc has returned--they did an MRI last week and she is STILL waiting for the results!
Here is this week's article about the ongoing Aquafest Saga. I sure hope I can do all of the things they say I am doing! It is scary to see it in print.... You can also see how long my hair is in the pic. I think I am going to go get it trimmed tonight--it doesn't spike very well anymore....
www.lakestevensjournal.com -
O.K Ladies
This weekend we are going to the coast ( Its a bank holiday and thats what The British do on bank holidays - sit in miles of traffic queues to go to a cold windy seaside!)
Back to the point. Being as we are virtual family now, it means i am a virtual aunty to all of the other kids. When aunties go to the seaside they bring back seaside rock ( sweets not stones!)
All i need is the names of the kids and i will mail them a stick of rock ( all kids love post, especially unexppected post!)
I PROMISE i will not send massive teeth rotting sticks!
(If any big kids out there want to join in thats fine by me too!)
Humour me, play along and send the names and the addresses that i dont already know.
DEbbie -
Ravedeb:
I totally relate to being changed in some really good aspects. I feel less willing to settle for the same old life I had. So, today I did something, by myself, that I never would have done . . . I attended the Buffalo Bills Training Camp. That's American football. I have always like football from back in my high school and college days. I like watching many sports and playing some. Anyway, since I moved to the Rochester, NY area I've become more and more interested in the Bills. They have been a losing team in all these 9 years, but I still like to follow the game and some of the players. So, they hold the pre-season training camp at a college that is a very quick 5 minute drive down the road. In the old days I would never have gone to a "male" place like a football camp, but really it is full of families, kids, old folks, etc. So, I took my lunch, water, binoculars, and a good hat and sat on the bleachers watching them practice and run through plays. I enjoyed myself and I don't care what anyone thinks about a middle-aged, matronly woman who likes the NFL. I know the NFL likes me because I have money to spend. Tadah - I know you'll agree with me! Maybe next year I take somebody with me or maybe I'll go on my own again. So, that's what I did today.
Hope everyone is well and enjoying life today,
Mary -
What is NED? Not Earning Dimes? No Earrings Dangling? Nearly Enchanting Dames?
I don't know all the lingo, I fear.
Mary -
I have heard about "bank holidays" previously and still do not know what makes a bank holiday. Please educate me. I wonder if the candy you are offering is anything like the salt water taffy that many people bring home from their vacations on the beach? At my office we just polished off a box from Rehoboth Beach (I think) in New Jersey or Delaware.
I love knowing you and following your vacations, er--holidays, I mean. It's almost more fun than a vacation for myself.
Mary -
Mary! LOL!
NED = No Evidence of Disease! Something we love to hear!
Good for you on going to Football camp! I am also an AVID Football fan, but my team is the Denver Broncos!!! I love the Broncos and when I lived in Denver I used to paint my face orange and blue and wear my orange cowgirl hat to the games!!!!
Do we have any other Football fans out there??? That time of year is coming! -
Oh, man . . . I should have known that! I do like this one however, "Naturally Enchanting Dames"!!!
I've been poking around on some other threads and came across this poem which I really liked and now wish to share with you. I grew up in the West (Salt Lake City) and have always had a "thing" for cowboys. (Which makes it strange that I married a very urban, Long Island, hates the outdoors kind of man.)
Courage is easy when a tame horse you ride
When rivers are low and no clouds fill the skies,
But thats not the test that must really apply
And there wont always be tame horses to ride.
When the wind is from the northwest, its teeth filled with snow,
And the temperature is dropping with each hour of the blow,
And youre twenty miles from a warm bunkhouse fire,
You freeze where you stop if homes not your desire.
When the water is rising with no way around
And a bunch of stray steers spread over the ground,
Youll have to hold up there till the water goes down
Or force a fording where some may drown.
When the nights are so lonely that there is no familiar sound
And where you are at isnt close to home ground,
Then it is what you are made of, what youve seen and learned
That keeps you up and not getting burned.
You can be sure of yourself, the person youve become
When the world drops its load out where you come from.
You wont whine or cry or make an excuse
But face that problem and not let it loose.
The days that will test you are always on the way
And you dont run and hide to avoid the fray.
You grab on the problems and just tan their hide,
You made your own courage and tamed the horses to ride!
--------------------
Friends are kisses blown to us by angels
Oh, I like that poem . . . especially "you made your own courage. . ." How empowering is that??
Bye for now,
Mary -
Well, today, I went for my mammogram and it was an awful experience.
As you know, I had the ooph and am still on pain meds. I went to there and they smashed my remaining boob, as I am standing there, I started to feel faint. Don't know if it was a heat flash coming on or the pain of the squish. As soon as she unsmashed me, I thought I would throw up!!! So, then I started hyperventilating and the whole cancer thing came rushing back at me.
It was just awful. I am not sure if I can ever go to that again alone??? Thank God my mom was there. I was sobbing and crying and the tech left to get me water but she came back all red eyed, you could tell she had been crying.
Anyway, back to my heatwave here in Corona ..... ugh -
kelly,
i'm sorry you had such a traumatic experience. I'm glad you weren't by yourself. These tests, scans, etc. are enough to make me go psychotic. I can get through this whole battle with having breast cancer and learn to put it behind me, but if I go through anything that resembles what I went through, I'm nuts. I still get choked up when I go to Georgetown for my appt. and they find my name in their system at the LOmbardi Cancer Center...I keep thinking....that is not supposed to be there!!!
Laura...please let us know as soon as you hear about the results, ok?
Love,
Amy -
Oh Kelly, I'm sorry that you had a little meltdown. It must be the anniversary thing that's giving us all flashbacks.
When you mentioned heatwave and Corona, I thought "beer"!! You drinking yet? Knock a few back, calm your nerves a bit.
Debbie: I'll take a stick of rock!! When I was a child we used to do the seaside thing, Bournemouth, Southend, you name it, I went there. -
Kelly - I am so sorry.... I can totally understand what you were feeling. NONE OF US ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS!!! At least we are all there for each other.... Don't know what I would do without all of you....
Debbie! Me too, Me too! I want a stick of rock! :-) -
TaDah! Am I drinking yet?? Um, I had 2 Coronas when I got back and now pretending to drink a diet coke...... it's got Seagrams 7 in it. I had to leave the hospital in a wheel chair since I couldn't stand any more. The rest of the mammo had to be taken from a seated position. I was too sick to stand.
The mammographer was so upset with and for me... she was an angel. It was so hard to try to get the whole boob and chest wall in the scan but my cement placeholder rock boobie was getting in the way.....
Laura, hope it's all ok for us!!
Amy, I just don't know how I am going to handle any more of this!!
((((((((( Scream))))))))))))))
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