please help

I HATE CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Dearest Sue, Shirlann, Ulla, Melody, Lisa, Poppy, Valerie, Tender, Karyll and everyone else, I have just caught up with a few of your posts. (I was away for 5 days and it's hard to catch up with everything).

Sue - I am so glad your boys are safely back with you. I can really relate to you with these problems. It's been 20 years this year since I left my husband but I remember access visits for my boys were often hellish, with them not wanting to leave me and ringing me and crying, wanting me to come and get them but I couldn't. They have been damaged emotionally from the crap they have had to put up with from both their father and stepmother over the years. In many ways they are closer to their stepfather because he is kind and non-judgemental. I am so glad you have a good relationship with your ex as this will be so beneficial to your sons.

I'm so sorry you are feeling so sick Sue and I hope you are able to rest and feel a little better on your day off.

I love the new avatars! Gorgeous Poppy and beautiful Ulla (please don't say you are not beautiful - you have both inner and outer beauty - I can tell from not only your photo but your loving words of comfort and empathy you give to Sue and the others here who are sad and suffering).

Sue, I think I know who Eva Cassidy is. I am pretty sure I saw a tv program about her a few years back and she did become more popular after her death. She had such a lovely voice.

I saw Gone with the Wind such a long time ago I can barely remember it!

New Year's Eve will be a quiet one for me. My partner will be in Sydney (to cut a long story short, we used to be married but divorced after 5 years of marriage. However, we got back together 4 years ago when I fell in love with him for the first time - I wasn't over my first marriage when I married him but it is so different now - I adore him! We spend weekends and holidays together.

Anyway, I plan to spend a very contemplative New Year's Eve. I want to take stock of 2007 and try to take in all that has happened. I feel that I need to do this alone and to try to organise and make plans for a better year to come. I have been constantly with people for the past month and I need some alone time to just sit quietly, maybe write out some of my feelings and thoughts, do some painting and listen to music so I can be ready for my nephew and his wife and baby who are arriving on Wednesday.

Love to all

gb 

My favourite song of eva is her version of fields of gold

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3YVil3Ajjs

I love this song. It was on an advert for people to pledge money for cancer reasurch in the UK. I couldnt watch it before I had cancer let alone now!

I was going to post a link to the ad but I just watched it again and I dont want to depress you all.

Have a listen to the song though its great

X

Sue & Poppy, thanks so much for turning us on to Eva Cassidy.  I have all ready downloaded  several of her songs. 

She makes me cry but I don't care!!!  

Aunty Em 

Hi Sue! Sorry your feeling bad. Auntie Em is right , I had the ice pops and Popsicles. It felt soothing to my mouth and got fluids too. I never had a dislike for water , but it was hard to keep drinking so much of it. I too , drank ginger ale , light Hawaiian punch , crystal lite ice tea.

Did you get David and Daniel's hair cut? My son always hated when I would cut his hair. He would cry and figgit around. I finally decided it was to much drama , and just took him to the barber.

Thanks again for tuning me on to  Eva. What a tremendous loss.

Gosh , I can't believe I've done nothing today! Just being a couch potato and watched tv all day. Still in my nightgown!lol I got to see my favorite Christmas program. I was disapointed , because I thought I missed it. But one of the cable networks had it on today. A Christmas Carol. OK , I hope everyone is having a good moment as Sue would say.

gb , so good to hear from you. I love how you got back together with your partner and "fell in love with him for the first time" after four years. I love how sometimes we get a "second chance" when the timing might not be right , but now it is and you appreciate it so much more. I hope your contemplating of the past year goes better than mine did. I just got angry and sad. But , I feel better today. I think I just have some issues yet. And when I start to think deeply of it all , I get emotional. Because it is still fresh in my being. But , even though that happens , one of my greatest blessings this year was finding all of you precious ladies that I can call my friends and sisters. I just feel a onenest with you all.

gb , have a good visit with your nephew and his family. My nephew got married this past summer. I was going through chemo then , so I couldn't go. They live in Tennessee. I think I will go this Easter. My mom and sister and her 2 of 3 children live there.

Blessings to you all.xxxx Melody

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL MY LADIES ACROSS THE GLOBE -

May yours be HEALTHY, HAPPY & full of LOVE,

Valerie 

Thank you to all of you for your well wishes for the new year!! I wish all of my wonderful courageous friends here a very healthy and happy NEW YEAR!  May 2008, bring us strength, good health and hopefully all together some how!! Those are my wishes for all of you...my dear special sisters!! I read through all of the posts since I was on last.  I know I can't remember all as I type. But I sure enjoyed reading them!! GB...I love your love story!! Thanks for sharing that.  I hope maybe someday, the love of my life will come into my life, and I won't have to die a lonely old lady.  That would be a wish I would have. (crying as I type this). Sue...oh my dear sweet Sue...I do hope you are feeling better.  I am glad to hear you had some rest.  I was VERY ANGRY to read about your ex-mil and how she took your boys 100 miles away!! GRRRRRRRRRR....that angered me so much!!  And, try adding some lemon to your water.  That helped me. Also..thank you for turning us on to Eva.  I clicked on the link that Poppy gave us.  I think I have heard her before!  Mel....I love reading everything you post!  You make me feel so good when I read your words!  I hope you feel better about the new year.  I am really looking forward to it!  I want to put 2007...to bed!!! It was a terrible year..and 2008....I am feeling renewed, alive and healthy!! I know that all of you special ladies will have a great year....it has to be...think positive...I pray for the best for all of us! Somewhere over the rainbow...has wonderful memories for me as well Mel!  When I was a little girl, my father would always whistle the song....I would plead..."Daddy, whistle it again daddy"!  Aren't childhood memories wonderful?! I know I will miss names, and sorry if I do...but I love you all, Mel, Sue, Poppy, Ulla, Shirlanne, Val, Gb, Karyll...you ladies have made the last few months so enjoyable!! THANK YOU!! I will try and check in tomorrow.  My oldest daughter is still here from Chicago, she and her boyfriend and a dear friend of mine, who is going through a divorce are all going to be here with me to ring in 2008!! We are having good food, drink..lots of drink..haha..and going to play some games!! I have to work at 9:30am on new years...so I may have to watch my corona's!! xoxo Lisa

i love u all ladies ,,hopping u will have a very happy new year

it seems that i will be the only one of u who will spent the new year eve aall alone ..

as i refused to go to stockholm to share in the furnral of the lady who i told u about ,,hubby is there allrready b,,he arived there today afternon...he must stay for 2 days at least,,so i will be all alone,,,

no family,,,

no hubby,,,

no kids,,,

no friends in here ,,,

but as i have u alll in my misrable life,,,i realy feel betterto think about...

so ,,,dont stop make my days by ur wonderfull words ,,songs ,,

love u alllll

Cheer up Ulla.xxxx Melody

Oh Wren , thank you so much for your post. Your MIL sounded like such a wonderful , compasionate lady. I would love to hear her journal enteries. And now you have a wonderful angel watching over you.xxxx

God Bless , and Happy New Year to you and your family.xxxx Melody

Ulla



You are not alone, we are right there beside you at midnight standing together ready to kick ass for another year.



We are very lucky to be here and I will thank god every day but especially tonight when I reflect. I may have to fight this again or I may not? I may be hit by a bus tomorrow (I won't get that drunk) LOL

but I will know WHATEVER happens I will never feel alone again after meeting you guys.

I know Im not the soppy person on this board, I am more the joker, but doesn't a smile make you feel better? ;-P Xlnt picture Melody (Thats my job) LOL



Wishing you all the best from the heart for another year, see you all on the other side

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hi..

loved ur all words ..mel,,gb,,poppy...

i really feel am not alone even that i am really,,,

no busses no trains yesterday and today too.so i will be in home all the time..wat a new year eve!!smiles.

mel i loved the pic,it made me laough from my heart,,ty

gb,,its only 3:13pm 31/12/2007 here ,,it seems that we have a huge time difference ..there is about 8:45 hrs till midnight here..

i am enjoying watching tv ,,it is swedish canal ,,very huge music concert ,,i love their voices and their way of singing,,,

i think it is some sort of global event,,,   (frostroses)  sponsered by uniceif ,,am not sure,,

this angelic music take me so so far away ,,,in a very green safe place ...where there is no pian,,no sickness,,no sadness,,nothing but love and piece allover ,,,,

by the way i miss karyll so much ...i hope she is enjoying the new year feeling well,,,love u ladies

Happy New Year's to you too Sue.

Take Care.

Trish