Here's what cheezed me off today

Thank you.😊 . Sometimes you really need to vent. Hence the topic of the forum. So nothing upset you today. Awesome.

When dealing with reccurrence ×4. It makes you slightly judgmental. Not so much a trust issue as it is my uncanny ability to see the big picture. Given my background it's quite easy.

Its like being a weather person sometimes you get it right and sometimes not.

It never seeks to amaze me that it is a shock for some if emotions are shown in a time of crisis. Three weeks ago I was slightly a different person.

Thanks Ro. For not offering me services. Lol

Well unfortunately you did not realize the comment was not directed at you or someone else.


Hence the topic of the forum was to vent. Yes your correct in people not realizing what others are going through.

Thank you again as stated above.

Sometimes cancer can turn you into a stressed out maniac. Sorry to get off the topic.

Sorry for your situation. Never a easy task and mental anguish can be exhausting.

rohanna - so sorry to hear about your mom. That must be so very hard. Sending you hugs!

funthing42 - also so sorry about your recurrences. It stinks to have to deal with this one time, I can't imagine having to deal with it as many times as you have. Take care - sending you hugs, too!

rohanna - Got it!! Thanks!

Funthing42: so sorry you are going through this anguish repeated times. I am forever in your pocket so to speak. I canno imagine the anguish and ups and downs you feel and send you support any way I can. Vent all you want. That's why this is here, It is called what 'cheezed' me off. and none of us never know when we will walk in your footprints. Vents help me to keep balanced. But then I'm a little 'odd' I guess.

Rohanna: To answer your questions, (hope this is not too long ) It's not in my bio, ( i should add it, I speak of it on other threads) but I am a 24 year survivor This is an entirely new cancer in other breast diagnosed 12/15. . It took a while for me not to think about recurrence, and honestly I really thought I was 'done' with breast cancer till this past December. How naive.

I'm fortunate to still be in touch with some of the support group women from 1993. A few of us were young, early 30's. Very young kids, my baby was 3. Some had recurrences very early. Some at a later date. Same breast etc. But a nice group of us are still living and pushing along. Some like me have had another BC in a different breast, that is very aggressive. I have IDC/IBC. Appeared 9 months after clear mammo and US (they always give me an US due to past diagnosis)

Some said enough with the group and went on. Still alive though. My cousin is one of those. A 18 year survivor who loved support groups, but once she was done, she left them all. There are a lot of women like that.

We all agree how far things have come, though not a cure. Additionally those of us that have had another BC, all agree that we are extremely grateful it happened now and not back then. So much is available. So many drugs in the arsenals.

You just never know. I do remember from last time, though I didn't have chemo (no need) that the treatment phase passed, and after a while you have days where it does not come into mind. Days, turn into months and then many years.

Things were so different years ago (1992) No hormone receptor tests, though they thought mine was hormone induced so I signed up for a clinical trial (tamoxifen) Yes Tamoxifen. Was on it a year. Possibly saved me from a recurrence. They feel it was so.

No oncto type, genetic etc. or if they did it did not matter. Got standard extensive lumpectomy and rads. Then on my way. Lots of mammos the first 5 years which was NOT good I feel. NO SCANNING> It just was not done. Had a chest xray. CT scans were not the norm. I went to University of Chicago and they had some of the best oncologists ever. He once told me, that no one dies of breast cancer in the breast or lymph nodes. Remember that. It's when it spreads, and even then the prognosis is not always bad, it's chronic. Wow, that was 24 years ago. So they were ahead in their thinking and treatment.

Also, it really bothered me last time (and I have to admit this time as well) that I got sick. I was a runner, no body fat, low fat diet, supplement addict etc. Very clean eating. Same with this time. Years ago the oncologist said, you have breasts that's why. Wow.

But no cancer in that breast this time. . So I was 'cured' of that one. If there is such a thing. It will be 25 years this November for that cancer.

Just wanted to share that it does get better. Eventually But the worry I think is part of the awfulness (is that a word) of this disease. It affects the body, mind and most of all your piece of mind. At least for me. Here I am, with that 3 year old is now 28 and my rock. My other kids are in their 30's and support me so much. They were so little before.

So sorry about your mom. In your pocket and sending hugs. Sorry for the long post. On a steroid high after my # 3 of 4 Taxols yesterday.

Val

Rohanna

Yes 24 years. I stopped worrying around year 3 about recurrence or a new cancer, or maybe sooner . I learned after the yearly mammos, and US that worrying would not change the results.I feel the same now with mets, there is no 'catching' them. You either have them or not.

This is an entirely NEW cancer, that I found myself, so worrying would do no good

This time I'm doing pretty good. , just finished #7 out of 8 chemo. Then surgery and rads. Didn't have the internet all those years ago. I'm happy for advancements in treatment but there is so much out there, to worry and second guess about.

Is anyone else havign a problem with this thread not clearing after reading it from their favorites?

Rohanna - I am soooo sorry to hear about your mom! That is just awful! I hope that the surgery takes care of it for her and they don't want her to do anything else. Thank goodness her GP checked into it further. Hang in there and take care!

I've been having some trouble with posting in this group, but... CONGRATULATIONS Rohanna on 5 years out! You are still here to give anyone shit who deserves it and I am sure there are tons of people out there that deserve it :-). Sorry to hear about your mom :-(. I hope she is doing better soon. Such a drag... first we get our health crap and then once we are pulling it together, our moms get their health crap. I suppose we are both lucky our moms are still here, but some days it is tough. Tell your mom I hope she is feeling well soon and that all goes easy for her. Take care!

Ahhh, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree! :-). My mom is doing well. It's still hard sometimes to grasp that she is now 84 and not the same lady who could walk though the malls with me until I could hardly stand anymore. She always had more stamina so that is different. She is still pretty sharp and I can see where I get my humor from (although I don't recall he being very funny when I was growing up). Strange how that works. Her dementia is one side of her and her whitty jokes and associations are the other side. Because she goes back and forth, I have to roll with it and continue to have patience when she isn't 100%. It can also be sad that although I talk with her about what is happening in my life, I can no longer ask for her advise and opinions because they just don't make sense. Her thoughts are coming from somewhere else and that is what Cheezes me. So I guess the realization that I have lost a bit of her can bum me out, but... she is safe, says she is happy and physically pretty healthy for her age. How did your mom's treatment go?

So, this isn't so much cheezed as it is wondering. My surgeon (a friend from years gone by) was following me until I cancelled last year. My MO, who I used to like, but now don't think much of, also was following me. I have my 5 year coming up, mammo appointment is set, but not sure if I need to see either of them. I kinda decided after my last MO appointment there was no reason to see this guy since I am not on ALs and he has become rushed. I suppose if I ever had a concern I could pop back in. I haven't seen the BS because, well... he is a BS, but I feel like I should sign off with him (and perhaps catch up :-)). Anyway, just feeling odd since my next Gyn. isn't until October and that is typically when regular people (we still aren't regular people) do their mammos.