2005 ROCK-TOBER CHEMO GIRLS

hi ladies,

i can't get myself together over my friend with the breast cancer recurrence. she's in my support group and tough as hell and now this is happening to her....recurrence on her sub-clavical lymphnode and maybe a spot on her chest.

i'm struggling with being so angry that this is happening to her and also my own terror that this could happen to me and then relief that it's not and then guilt for feeling that way. any advice?

We did it Maryanne!! This was my last chemo too! Congratulations!!!! You always know how to put things just so! You're right, this does put our own mortality in our face. And you're right again when you said we have to fight fear and live peacefully each day...I've been chewing on that thought since I read it!!!
Sherry - I'll be joining you with PT - the nurse looked at my arm today and thinks it's possible lymphedema too. It's mildly swollen at the wrist but the arm has been very sore lately. This PT specializes in lymphedema and chording problems with BC patients...ayayay!
Brenda-Sending positive thoughts your way too!
Amy-I'm so sorry about your friend!

Celebrating no more chemo...I've decided on sushi and wine...I'll wait a few weeks first!! Don't want my liver to go into shock!!

Thanks, Laura as I lay awke for hour last time it was oggod feeling to know that soon I will feel better and go back to good sleeps.

Nice feeling to be finished chemo isn't it Rosemarie. Just two more weeks of suffering and then on the mend. I joined the YMCA today for 4 months. Have gained 20 lbs and become very deconditined so ams sure it will help as long as i cam motivate myself to go. Wish me luck.

My oncologist suggested I work fewer hours for the first three months when I start back to work . My job is demanding and includes working 3 day weekend every seventh with possibility of little sleep. He said I sjould not do that part at all ijitially. Boy, I could have kissed him.

Celebrated yesterday with a movie, glass of wine and pecan chocolate sundae... thank God for antiemetics.

Fists up!

Brenda -

Sounds like you have a great balance: family, career and YOU! (And, your family is beautiful!)

Laura

maryanne -
I feel bad that you and others here have to deal with this for a year. Although I am relieved to hear that the sides aren't as bad as chemo. I'm glad they will be doing regular heart checks! I definately plan to be right here for the next year or more with all the Herceptin girls!


When do you start rads? I start on April 17.

WHO ELSE WILL BE STARTING RADS SOON?

I think it's you, me and ravdeb. Anyone else that you know of?

Laura

Had my tattooes today and mapping. Did not like either! Hated having to lay still for so long and the 3 tattooes I got HURT! I'm such a baby about things like that! But, that's okay cuz other than that and a few pains and numb toes, I'm feeling quite good! Maryanne..you will be feeling so much chipper soon now that you are done with chemo...and Rosemarie, too!!!!

Amy...I'm so sorry that you are dealing with your friend's recurrence. Just be there for her when she needs somebody to hold her hand or if she needs a shoulder to cry on or if she just needs a friend to laugh with a bit. You know this as you have always been there for all of us.

And..Amy...you should just be thankful that it hasn't happened to you. It's important to feel thankful and be grateful. That's how I see it. Besides...it gives you the strength to be there for your friend.

ravdeb

Terynsmom - I'll keep you in my thoughts!!!
Ravdeb - I'm glad you're feeling better!!! I for one slept all day but am feeling ok. I hope that doesn't mean I'll have another sleepless night!
Maryanne - I'm glad you'll be able to take it easy...or easier- at first as you transition back to work. (I'm starting to think about thinking about going back to work!)
Laura - I'll be thinking of you ladies doing rads!
Next week my kids will be off for spring break - I hope to explore the midwest...now that I'm a midwesterner! (Laura, you and I may not live too far from each other!) I MISS warm weather but am excited to have 4 seasons now - never had that in Florida!!
Love to all! I have to add - my 3 year old is standing behind me in the chair I'm sitting in as I type. He just kissed me and told me I'm beautiful...what a man! (Sappy I know.)

well, as always i am so behind on all the news...

Mary-Anne and Rosemarie - congratulations!! Its the best feeling, isnt it. It can only get better from now on.

Terynsmum - i am sure you'll be back on track in no time! Maybe try some Co-Q10 supplements, its supposed to be good for the heart? Check with your onc of course.

Amy - i hear you... the thought of recurrence and mets never leaves me. I think the best we can do is enjoy life day by day, and not worry too much about the future, which is uncertain anyway. Take good care of your body.. I am sorry about your friend. Be there for her!

Ravdeb - dont worry about rads. I have what must be THE WORST burn, and STILL i insist its nothing compared to chemo. The discomfort is localised, you just dont get (or i didnt anyway) that 'can't get off the bed' feeling, that i hated so much during chemo.

I HAD MY LAST RADS SESSION YESTERDAY!!!!! hurray, all the 'active' treatment is finished!!!

Zoladex and Tamoxifen are to be started shortly... not looking forward to all the side effects. My onc checked my hormone levels, and apparently i am premenopausal, so at least chemo didnt take that away from me. Well, that will change with Zoladex..

A question to other premenopausal ladies - did you discuss with your onc pros and cons of Zoladex+Tamoxifen vs Tamoxifen alone? It just seems to me that most take Tamoxifen only, so I wonder why Zoladex is given to me... I am 90% ER positive, could that be why?

paula...maybe it depends on how ER+ you are. I'm about 75% ER+ which is lower than yours. i'm going to take tamoxifen for 2 years and then re-evaluate if we continue Tamoxifen, change to something else, etc.

congrats on finishing treatment!!!!! is your head bare yet? might be a way to mark the end of treatment

I had a visit to my onc and she said OVARIES OUT, so I am going to see my gyne again for the consult. I am glad I won't have to take Tamoxifen now that I am having the surgery. Even though I had been on chemo, my body was still producing estrogen, small amounts but still, I don't want it.

I was in the chemo chair next to a lady who now has mets and she was on Tamoxifen and still had her periods. I asked if she told her doc and said NO..... not too smart. I would have told ASAP. My gyne said that in some women the Tamoxifen does not work 100% and that their bodies would start producing estrogen again after a few years.

Anyway, I may tell my onc too much and I give her copies of studies I find on this site but at least she knows what's going on in my body and in my head.

Hey Terynsmom..hope all is well with that big ol' heart of yours.

Paula..thanks for the pep talk on the rads..looks like I may get to do them in the late afternoons and that suits me really great as then I can get to work on other things in the mornings..I'm an hour and a half from the center and was worried it would take up my entire day for the 7 weeks. Congrats on finishing treatments!!

Maryanne..My skin is very white, too, and these 3 dang tattooes are bigger than I thought! I don't know if I'll get rid of them or not, but I agree with you..I feel marked and I really don't like the whole feeling about that. I have a bad feeling about tattooes in general, and I understand why they do them, but still..don't like it!!!!

Still itching...for those who itched from Taxol, how long did it take to stop itching???

Rosemarie..hope the fatigue is fading for you. I really am feeling better in that dept despite the fact that I'm not sleeping much and itching like @%*$and have neuropathy in feet and hands. So much fun!

ravdeb

Dang, my hair is falling out again. Probably only had a good liitle growth as I took those two weeks off chemo for my trip. I will be so mad if it all goes...

I don't owe extra tax Yeah ,Bought a lotto ticket as obviously my lucky day.

Going on third night of no sleep. Will Definitely take sleep meds tonight. I am bagged.

Terynsmom, hope all goes well with oopherectomy, who needs the damn things in your situation, you have your beautiful daughter so they have done their job. I think it is great to keep in step with onc. I know it makes mine a little nervous but because I have brought him articles I got my Herceptin started 5 months ahead of his plan. Keep up the good work. I am sure your MUGA will return to normal next month then off you go again with Herceptin. My Muga is Tuesday, have had 4 doses so far, cross your fingers mine goes well.

Laura we have a Nukemboobies thread going for April, have you been there? I am so overtired I may have forgotten your posts , will go look.

Fists up!

Meet Sam - my weapon in the weight loss campaign. O.k , he doesnt seem to be working yet but he only has little legs - give him a chance!!

Debbie

That is classic carpal tunnel, often worse at night, usually affects the first three fingers and half of ring finger. You can buy a resting splint at a pharmacy to wear when you go to bed. Also maybe you should look at how you are using or overusing your hand.

My Her2 status took about one month, Debbie, get on their case, you will want to get going ASAP if it is 3+. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Your dog is cute, mine is choc lab, she is part of my weight loss program too.

Fists up!