The Hermit Club

camillegal

Welcom Nikki--but I'm sorry for u having to be here at all Everyone On here is pretty hermitty but of course has to go out sometimes--I don't work anymore so I'm on alot and I love my hermitude and proud of it. U'r just starting and there has to be alot going on in u'r mind and sometimes u don't want to talk about it--unless people understand and all of us do. This is a wonderful haven for questions, ranting, raving or just complaining. We all do. So u start Wed. I'm glad u'r plan is in order--tell us how u'r doing and how everything is going.

Teka

NikkiLiz,

Welcome!

Excellent, being a member of a chemo thread.   I was only a member of a radiation thread.   Can never have to much support on your BC journey.

markat

Hi Nikkiliz.



Whaevah, in real life I'm just another outcast soccer mom trying to hustle my way through life I haven't seen Willfred yet, but I think I wanted to. I watch a ridiculous amount of TV. I love Girls. It's one of those shows I wanted to hate because I'm a 30-something that would rather poke my eyeballs out than go through or watch tv about that stage of life. But then it was so damn good I couldn't stop watching it! Did you watch the Golden Globes? Tina and Amy were so good, and Kristen and Will (we're on a first name basis).



Camille the cake was pretty and actually tasted good. Abby loved it! She had a wonderful birthday.



Teka hope you feel better soon. I'm starting to feel a little cruddy, but I just be run down.



Hugs to all.

markat

Hi Nikkiliz.



Whaevah, in real life I'm just another outcast soccer mom trying to hustle my way through life I haven't seen Willfred yet, but I think I wanted to. I watch a ridiculous amount of TV. I love Girls. It's one of those shows I wanted to hate because I'm a 30-something that would rather poke my eyeballs out than go through or watch tv about that stage of life. But then it was so damn good I couldn't stop watching it! Did you watch the Golden Globes? Tina and Amy were so good, and Kristen and Will (we're on a first name basis).



Camille the cake was pretty and actually tasted good. Abby loved it! She had a wonderful birthday.



Teka hope you feel better soon. I'm starting to feel a little cruddy, but I just be run down.



Hugs to all.

markat

Oops posted twice so I deleted instead of just editing. Ugh maybe I do have a fever haha.

Skittle

Hey, all.  Hope all's well.  Markat--feel better.  I thought the Globes were the best award show in ages.  Hilarious.  Most just drag.  Glad your cake was a hit.  Happy little girl memories are priceless.  Such a good mommy. 

Teka--   whaevah--better?  Fl--you ok?  Long quiet.  I understand.  Liz--doing well?  Jazzy--I'm always impressed by science people.  I guess especially since my brain just goes into huh? mode.

Nikki--welcome.  Great group. Warmth and understanding among hermits.  Hoping your journey can be softened by the blanket of acceptance and experience offered here.

Camille--more energy at all?  Take care.

Hugs to each.   

camillegal

markat I'm glad u'r cake was a hit--it sounded so cute. And u'r probably dragging cuz u've been so busy lately. I hope that's it.

Teka how r u doing? whaevah how are u doing too?

Skittle I'm OK saw Onc today she ordered another blood test and we talked just junk stuff. She's very nice. I get my heart scan Wed. and no real eating all day cuz I have the down the throat and up the ass test Thurs. (as Teka would say LOL) So u see I'm busy this week WOW I'm so excited--NOT See why I like to stay in???

Hve a nite sleep everyone.

markat

Super quiet around here! Hope everyone is feeling okay. I'm feeling better, just tired.



Hugs!

camillegal

Hi Markat 3rd day down now--of course u'r tired--but are u happy with it? I hope so.

I had my test scheduled for today and o2 for tom. but they were cancelled---get this---I'm to sick to be in the hospitssl for them. hahahaha I'e had diarrhea for a couple of days and just weak and shakey so has to be reschuled the scan will be Tues. and then I see another Dr. right after.???--So that means I didn't leave my hous since Monday, couldn't be far from the bathroom---so I'm nicely hermituding. Good thing I like to. Beside everyone is saying it's cold, so I'm fine inside.

It is quiet today I hope everyone is doing all right.

Teka

Hospitals are cautious due to the flu.   (D) scary!!

markat

Camille so sorry they had to reschedule. I'm still liking it. I've just been staying up too late reading and watching tv. I finished the book "Gone Girl" in two days. That's just stupid-staying up, not the book.



Teka hope you're feeling better!

Jazzygirl

Hi fellow hermits:

Struggling through the week with energy up and down. I wonder if it may be from the internal rad last week or all that goes having been away, and then trying to recover as I return? My client has been VERY needy this week too, and that has not helped. Going to bed early tonight, hopefully tomorrow will be better. I know many on this thread struggle with fatigue and sisters, I hear ya on that front this week!

Nikki- welcome to our little world where we cherish our hermitude. I spent a lot of time in a shell last fall after two major health things that struck at the same time. I think we need to have that alone time to adjust to the "new normal" that becomes our daily lives.

Camillegal-sorry to hear you are having GI issues. Get plenty of rest and fluids.

All you other wonderful women, take care of yourselves. Will pop in again this weekend.

LizLemon

Hi all! Having another busy week with work. But I feel like I'm in a good mental place right now to be able to really focus on it, vs. struggling to do the smallest thing, which I have been dealing with these past weeks. I am so tired, though. However, I'm one week in to my Xeloda (4th cycle - god it seems like I've been taking it forever), and I've felt much better this time around. Can't explain that at all - but there you have it. No horrific gas/bloating this time around. Maybe my body is learning to deal with it better or something. I dunno - I just hope when I schedule my scan in a few weeks that it comes out ok so I can keep taking this and not have to switch to something more harsh.

In other news, my pulmonologist, while no doubt a brilliant physician, (whom I do trust) was holding the door when common sense was being given out. He says to me yesterday, "Well, you just have a little chronic problem." Oh? Is that all? Well, then! Let's break out the champagne! It was just the way he said it. I know he was saying it to be nice, and I get that I'm being a bit catty - but really. 

No travel for work on the foreseeable horizon, and I'm so excited about that...especially with the flu spreading like it is. Being on planes with all the hacking and coughing freaks me out under normal circumstances, much less now! People can be so gross! Blech!

camillegal

LL I'm glad work is going better and u'r feeling better, of course u have to be tired--work is tiring enough let alone with the other things oing on. I hope u start feeling better and better.

It's kind of empty here lately--more are working.

Teka how are u doing--did u call the Dr.

Skittle

Hugs to all for feeling better.  Camille--did you ever conquer D?  There are all sorts of Google health news pieces now on fecal transplants.  I had never heard of it until you said...  what a world we live in.  Wonder who thought it up.

BS appt today.  Dx mammo took forever.  Radiologist did not like films, kept trying again and again... squish, squash, splat.  ugh.  Asked dr about pain--her response, "You want surgery for that?"  gee thanks.  So, she simply upped my magnesium dose.  We'll see what happens.   I really do try to stay positive.  and my hermity self just wants to stay home.  Cats understand.  Curl up, sleep, soak up any warmth to be had.  Find a sunny spot and an understanding spirit.  Sleep some more.

cranky me.  Bah humbug.   Sooo glad for tomorrow being Friday.  Usually the kids are more cheerful, panting for the weekend.  It'll be a good day.

Wishing you all improving health.  and laughter.  and love. 

Teka

camillegal,

I've diverticulosis with more off then on (D).

Skittle,

BS was talking down to you in order to deflect your question about the pain.   There could be many reasons for the pain.  Trust your gut and cover your butt.

camillegal

Hugs ladies--u know I hade D for over 5 yres getting worse and worse with loads of tests, biopsies and all kinds of things and it's always been a puzzle--What I am having I've had before they just do the same tests--but this last year has been the worst, been sicker with pain and for longer periods of time--When I told this new Dr. themeds I take and how much his highbrows went up and he said it doesn't stop--nope. So that's why it's become much more os a problem-- so we'll see what happens with this group of Drs. that's all/

Jazzygirl

Hi fellow hermits:

Catching up on your post.

Camillegal- I hope you are feeling better soon. Anything GI related is wicked on top of all the rest. I had a ruptured appendix last year that almost took me out and my GI system has never been quite the same. When it rains, it pours sometimes.

LizLemon- glad you are in a good place and not having to travel. I agree about the flu and other things going around. We must protect our immune systems!

Went to see my breast surgeon today to get checked post procedure for the internal rad last week and all is well there. Made it through that ordeal and without infection. But not as good news is my OncTypeDX test for both breasts in the intermediate range, and now talk of chemo on the table. Due to early stage and grade, clear nodes, chemo has always been off the table until now. Going to be talking to two MOs and see what they advise. My breast surgeon says there is no clear answer on chemo for this range. Just when I thought I might be coming through the other side of this. I now understand the expressing "living with cancer" so much better as I go through this.

The weekend approacheth although there are work things going on for me a bit there too. But I will also embrace some nice quiet time too!

Peace and love to all of you!

camillegal

Oh Jazzy sorry to hear about the chemo--but it's true this beast does not go down quietly. Just hang in there and if u have 2 Drs. telling u u need it, then u probabl should--there are lots of bumps on this road and we just let the Drs. do what they do best. Let us know as soon as u know.

Jazzygirl

Camillegal-thanks for your note. Got the actual score for the invasive which is 23, DCIS is low reoccurrence (12). I won't get much info for awhile yet, next step is the next internal rad in late Feb and will meet with one med onc there, the other Med Onc in March. No one is rushing me to the doctors on this one (if it were a high risk number, chances are, things would be different). I am going to research things and be well prepared for my apts when I do have them.

How is your D?

Teka

Jazzygirl,

Crapshoot!   I got a copy of pathology report that stated "Foci suspicious for lymphvascular invasion are present", and MO when asked to explain, couldn't look me in the eyes.   My sentinel lymph nodes were cancer-free.   Lookup "lymphvascular invasion " on-line.

Jazzygirl

Teka- shoot, I checked that out. What does that mean for you? No wonder he could not look you in the eye. Crapshoot is right! 

Teka

Jazzygirl,

Let me answer your question this way------------I was ecstatic with clear margins around malignant tumor removed during lumpectomy and sentinel lymph nodes cancer-free.   I didn't pay any attention to "Foci suspicious for lymphvascular invasion are present", until after starting in Clinical Trial with chemo and Avistan treatments.   MO was already throwing everything at my TNBC.   I would have gone along with just radiation treatments if MO had been an incompetent A-hole.   So far so good!!!! 

You need to ask the scary questions, to decide your BC journey.

camillegal

Teka I hope u'r feeling better too.

Wow All of u ladies just throw my mouth open--I never read one report, cuz I didn't understand anything anyway, therefore I had no questions, therefore I had no worries, therefore I still don't know what anything means and when we got our blood tests back while chemo was going on I thouht let's play liar blood test and we'd all try to win who had the lowest score-I thought that was good, but I did learn eventully it usually wasn't so I know more about blood panels cuz I'm always getting them. LOL

My D stopped late yesterday, but I know it could start tomorrow I rake so many meds for it-The Drs. can't figure out why I'm not consripated LOL so I know more about SE and after chemo and herceptin cuz it's still going on and I see the Drs. all the time for testin. But I still don't worry--that's what makes me the queen of hermits I don't think about any of this I just go along. I'm so weird.

Jazzygirl

Teka-thanks for your insights. You are right about asking the scary questions, and already compiling a list. This news came from the breast surgeon's office who ordered the test, and I realize before I get my panties in a wad that I need to have the MO consults as they will be the ones to help me to understand the scores along with the rest of my pathology, etc. and what my options are. No one is rushing me in to have this conversation either, which might be the case if the scores were higher. I got myself calmed down at bit about this after a few conversations and some research yesterday.

Also found another discussion group here on this site around this particular subject and how women are going about making their decisions. Some good information out there to ponder. 

Camillegal-glad your D is better. Enjoy your hermitude! I wish for more of that than I might get this weekend.

bgirl

Sorry I have been just lurking mostly.  Feeling incredibly whinny and I hate myself for it.  So many are dealing with really bad crap right now and it just seems bad to whine about nothing.  Not my usual style and so am frustrated with myself right now.

Jazzy - I was also in middle range.  Decided against chemo as the benefit percentage of doing chemo did not seem worth the risks (and they are real).  Doable if you have to, but same as with making choices about your rads you need to be sure about what is right for YOU.  Only thing I thought that was worse than chemo, was doing chemo and not getting much benefit.  We all know there are no guarantees ... so you just have to make a choice you can live with.  More treatment is not really insurance .  Very tough, but you sound like a very smart woman and I am sure will weigh all the info.

Cami - glad to hear off the D train today .... hope it stays that way.  Hope you can get your tests and maybe some answers.

Happy weekend to my fellow hermits

FLwarrior

Hi Hermits!  I try to read and stay some what caught up...but I am stretched so thin on time now that I am back working full time (with a longer day and longer commute, ugh).  The new job is uuhh...well like a roller coaster. One day is good and the next is straight from hell.  I never know what to expect when I go in.  Very nerve racking and emotionally taxing (exhausting!!!) to deal with the "personality" of the dept manager. She is very nice...but...VERY MICRO-MANAGING and VERY MIRCO-CONTROLLING!!! I HATE that part of it and pretty much told her that on Thursday.  She admits to it, owns it, apologizes, and promises it will get better.  Friday it was better...but what will Monday bring?

Sorry, I am full of whines today.  My best friend has a job interview on the other side of the state Tuesday.  I wish her well and I understand her reasoning, but I will really miss her if she gets the job and moves over there. 

Those of you who had MX and SNB, do you have uncomfortable 'tightness' in your arm pit area, shoulder, upper arm?  I am a year and a half out from sx and the comfort level is not getting better, if anything it is getting worse.  I do not have lymphadema that I know of.  No swelling or puffiness. Fortunately I do have full use of my arm, it just doesn't feel "right" and is extremely annoying. When my arm is down to my side it feels like there is a wad of something stuck in my arm pit. Anyone else have that sensation? I was having shoulder PAIN for about a month, but thankfully that has resolved!

Enough about me. Sorry for all the whining.

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend!!!

Teka

FLwarrior,

Good idea to ask your question on "GRRRRRRRRR I HATE LE.........." thread.   They've been through and heard it all.

FLwarrior

Skittle, after reading my last post I’m sure you get the “long-quiet”.  I meant to watch the globes.  I was sad when I realized that I missed them.  Ouch! To the radiologist.  Squish and squash is no fun!  One of the threads I am on (uh oh…can’t remember which one…) they talk about how there should be a “Man-o-gram” and do the squish, squash thing to their thingy…and see if they don’t come up with a better diagnostic test real quick!!!  (silly but amusing thought…) 

Markat the cake sounds really cute! Bet your daughter was very thrilled!  Hope you are getting rested. Glad you are liking your new job!

Jazzy hope you are recovering well and getting rested from both the rads and the trip. Both can be tiring events.  This crazy bc journey really is a MAZE with unknown twists and turns and you really never know where it ends!  Read and study what you can, write down your questions and take them with you to both MO appointments.  Gather the insight from the MO’s and get all of your questions answered (I agree with Teka, even the scary ones…), ponder it all, pray (if you do) and make the decision that is best for YOU!

Liz glad you are getting your energy and focus back.  Best wishes for great scan results!!!  I lived north of Dallas for MANY years…I grew up in Richardson (with the exception of a couple of years in Austin).  Lived in Carrollton and Farmers Branch during high school.  I bought a house and raised my son in The Colony. What area are you in?

Camille hope you are doing well today!!! 

Teka was that your original path report or one you just recently got?  How long ago was it?  Crapshoots…just suck!

bgirl  just know that you are not alone in the whiney place. I am right there with you!  Hope you do enjoy your weekend!

Hope everyone is feeling good and as healthy as possible.  There is so much cold and flu going around here.  I try and keep my distance from anyone and everyone and wash my hands a lot! 

I ventured out of my shell last night went to one of my LEAST favorite places, the mall.  I HAD to get some clothes for work.  I spent the last 4 years going to work in scrubs, so I have no work wardrobe.  Every time I heard someone cough, sneeze or sniffle…I suddenly went the other direction!  I was lucky and found a few things all on sale or clearance YEAH!  Now I won’t have to do that again for a while!

Happy Weekend Hermits!

Teka

FLwarrior,

Surgical Pathology Report in 2010, before MO started me on Clinical Trail.   I think MO didn't want to work me up.   I was already stressed out over posts I had read on-line.   MO still asks if I am on-line, and my answer is "yes, but I stay away from the scary crap".