The solution to painful intercourse!!!!!! Yipeee!

Del11

There's an oil-based organic lubricant called Yes that works well. They make a water-based version too. http://www.yesyesyes.org/

The oil-based version has cocoa butter and Shea butter.

jeanmare

We just tried the screamcream! WOW. Its been a long time but it was fantastic. I also used the lidocain. It works for the skin pain, but as with many of you, I have problems getting past the muscles that tighten up. I had been to therapy for that several years ago and besides the dilators, doing kegal exercises as often as you can will help. I'm also hoping that I won't be so nervous about the pain next time.

I never would have known about this if y'all hadn't been so willing to share, THANK YOU!

BTW, I had my GP perscrbe it and she prescribed some for herself also (we are the same age and tend to have lots in common except she's a doctor and I've got cancer). I guess we can compare at my next appointment.

 Now if I can find a way to keep our dog off of the bed and out of the room!!

And for what it's worth, I've been told to use crisco.

3jaysmom

found the coconut oil in a stick, and its helping daaily.. a lady i know from chem said there's a way they "stretch "those" muscles, so when we find a gyn that tKES MY INS, GONNA ASK FOR THAT, TOO.. ALOG WITH SC!!!!3JAYSsorry for caps.. my wandering hand) 

lindatwo

Does anyone know if there is a difference between cocoa butter and cacao butter?  I found cacao butter at Whole Foods, but haven't found cocoa butter anwhere except online.  I am thinking they are the same thing, but I'm not sure so didn't want to spend 15.00 for it until I was sure.

3jaysmom

i've noticed the cocoa butter at whole foods, and they did say it was food grade.. so im sure its ok.. i opted for coconut oil, i think the oil works better for me, "in " and "around..

  i saw an article that theyre now recommending coconut oil for alzheimers, as well, so got a BIG one, and anything i sute' i use it, and add it to my oatmeal in am, also.. maybe it'll help "ms fog" too... 3jays

Del11

cacoa and cocoa are the same thing, but I think "cacao" is used more often to refer to the raw form.

Enjoyful

Update, but not really -

I ordered, and picked up, Scream Cream without the l-arginine.  I haven't tried it yet but will report back on the Scream level.

Cocoa butter - I bought a small jar, melted it by sitting the jar in hot water, then poured the liquified butter into tiny ice cube tray.  The result?  Small cocoa butter suppositories.  I haven't tried them yet, but wanted to tell you guys it's possible and workable, though messy.

Are we having fun yet??

Del11

re: cocoa butter... I bought a candy mold with small egg shapes.  They're meant to be put together to make a full chocolate egg, but I just use the one half. It's the perfect shape and size, and the candy mold makes it very easy to get them out.

Enjoyful

Perfect!  I actually looked for tiny penis-shaped ice cube molds (you know, Rush Limbaugh-sized), but no luck.

(Apologies to anyone who's a Limbaugh fan.)

Adey

Scootaloo-  Ha!  (c:

Jeskachi- Put those in my Easter basket!

janetlp

Thats ok I was looking for the Bill Maher sized ones and they were sold out !!! LOL

Enjoyful

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  Good one!

Adey

janetlp

Enjoyful

You guys are funny.  :-) 

truebff

cfdr,

I LOVE Hello Kitty! I have a light up Hello Kitty Fairy Telephone where the wings and the wand light up when the phone is ringing!

dragonfly1

Hi everyone, I've been following this thread with interest because sex has become impossible since chemo (Feb-May 2011). I'm 42 and this was not something DH and I thought we'd be dealing with for such an extended period time. I've tried the usual Replens, KY liquibeads, Astroglide, etc and it's still miserable-like scraping with razor blades miserable. So, I went to the Gyn this week with the SC instructions and she wrote a prescription! I'm waiting to hear back from a compounding pharmacy about whether they can make it but they think they can get all the ingredients and will let me know soon.

I also wanted to share that I was hesitant/embarassed to ask for SC because of the name. So, I just found a way around it. I copied and pasted the instructions and removed "scream" (I know, I'm a chicken). I just explained to her that a lot of women on BCO are getting very good results when nothing else works and I'd like to try this cream. Anyway, it was a lot less embarassing and she wrote it without any problem.

I'll report back when I have some results...Thanks again for the info-I'm so hopeful that this will be a solution.

3jaysmom

we have a sex shop nearby , i got those ice cube trays for a bachlorette party.. gonna try to get them next week..what a good idea.. a little penis could never hurt, eh? hahah.3jays

Enjoyful

There is such a thing as penice cube trays?  Who knew???  I must lead a sheltered life.

cfdr

truebff...that telephone sounds like a conversation starter!

I made a mix of cocoa butter and coconut oil, and have been using that nightly with an applicator. It's just the right consistency for the applicator to scoop up, but it also melts quickly and doesn't feel slimy like replens. 

Still having tight muscle issues though. So I'll be on to a search for dilators. I didn't think I'd need "marital aids" once I was married!

NCbeachgal

I was hoping to maybe have a little sex this week, but in the last couple days I've noticed pain around my clitoris. I've had the pain before and was diagnosed with an external yeast infection. So, i thought it was the same thing this time. My NP at the gyno says no. She says it's vaginal dryness and thin skin with fissures. Around my clitoris? She RX a compounded cream of lidocaine, triamcinolone, and zinc oxide. If I use the lidocaine/steroid cream on or near my clitoris, wouldn't it stand to reason that an already difficult orgasm will become impossible? This has been a very rough couple of weeks and I thought a pleasurable weekend activity may make it better. I guess not. I am so mad, depressed and confused.

hrf

NCbeachgal. I totally uderstand the pain as I've had the same thing. I don't know if you are on an AI but that was the cause of my problem. What she has given you is just a "patch up" not a cure. My gynecologist Rx Vagifem -which is safe for ER+ women - and it fixed everything up very quickly. 

NCbeachgal

hrf-thanks for the reply. I'm not on an AI yet. I wlll be after chemo. I've done 4 ACand 1 of 4 taxol. What is the active ingredient in vagifem? I think I'll google it. This and constipation are unexpected side effects of this hell.

hrf

Vagifem is estrogen but if used as directed, it does not move outside the area ... It actualy builds up the vaginal wall which prevents the estrogen from travelling.

3jaysmom

adam and eve website is very discreet re: marital aids, if someone wondering... just clear your brwosing history after you search, if your nervous about getting ads after being there...3jays...

TinaT

hrf - Arg, so confusing....  Both my MO and GYN nixed Vagifem as they said that a small amount likely makes it into the bloodstream.  Neither will recommend it for ER+ patients. 

3jaysmom

yup. mines said nay also.. im not foolin with estrogen, just doing coconut oil. and a dilator awhile back......3jays

hrf

Both my MO and GYN said that it is fine. My gyn especially is an expert in these matters and is fully informed of all the latest research. They are at the 6th largest cancer research centre in the world. The tiny bit of estrogen builds ups the vaginal wall so nothing can pass through. If the vaginal wall is thin and cracking, then yes, estrogen could pass through. That's why the vagifem is so good.

After 3 months on Arimidex I was in constant pain and discomfort. The gyn said that while my symptoms were typical of someone on Arimidex, it was even worse than normal. The tissue was totally breaking down and I couldn't cope any longer ... so it was also a QOL issue for me. Anyway, I have a lot of confidence in this gyn and I know he wouldn't put me in any situation where I would be harmed. He is also quite conservative and doesn't jump on the latest trend in medicine. But I think each of us has to do what we are comfortable with. If my gyn had said no, I would have respected him. I didn't ask for the Vagifem, it was his recommendation. I think the tx for the bc are worse than the bc itself. 

NCbeachgal

The PA at my GYN office suggested that I check with my MO about testosterone cream. She said a small amount would build up the skin. Any thoughts?

I used the compounded lidocaine cream once and it was fine. I switched over to coconut oil in hopes of some action later today. Why do the treatments of breast cancer and the side effects and the treatment of the side effects need to leave me numb all over? It's nice to live a little!

Hope this day is a good one!

jancie

Testosterone cream was mentioned by an oncologist gynocologist - ok try saying that really fast!  I met him at an Image Reborn Retreat but when I wanted to go see him about the pain I was having - I was told he only handled surgical patients.  Whatever!

So yes, I tried the Vagifem (my onco said QOL was more important than the itsy bitsy amount of estrogen in the product) but that didn't work.  I also tried replens - didn't help.

My urologist mentioned using Crisco (same as using coconut oil) but the problem wasn't so much the dryness as it was the pain.

I don't have an issue with numbness from the lidocaine - maybe because I only use a very small amount.

However, I want to report that since I have been using the SC since November along with the lidocain - I don't need the lidocain so much anymore and stuff is really starting to work again inside of me.  After 2.5 years of agonizing pain - it is so nice to have relationships pain free and also get that "O" again. 

Last night things were a bit tight (KWIM) and I was scared that I would have pain but I didn't.  The time before it was easier but maybe it was those bottles of wine we drank for our anniversary.

With the SC you don't need to use the replens, or any other type of product like that.  Just use the SC for awhile and you can dump the rest away - at least that is what I have experienced.

Also, it is not like we are "regular" at this - you know the old saying "use it or lose it" - we go weeks without sex and yet the SC comes through every single time.  I no longer have to wait 20 minutes to allow the SC to work.  My wait time is now down to 5 minutes.