My Fellow Deletees and The Cyberbullied Sisters

pip57

"We are all adults here, and shouldn't need anyone to babysit us.  We are each responsible for our own words and actions.  If we all treat everyone here with respect, even when we disagree with each other, life will be less stressful, and that is good for everyone's health and well being."

 

If only that would happen.  I think it is necessary for people to remember which sites they are posting on and to realize that certain language and behavior that is acceptable on one, is not acceptable on the other.

 

 

konakat

I can't see who uses the report function so I wonder how one can say the "wailers" are using it liberally.  Someone still has their stick.

Enjoyful

Bren, that's going to smell nice when it burns!  I love cedar.

Alpal

Enjoyful - if you haven't burned my gold leaf pearl studded stick yet, do you mind holding off? I may need it back. Thanks

bluedahlia

Phasers on ignore seems prudent.  I have enough health issues and I don't need this crap.  I never used the ignore feature before but this last episode put me back a few months.  I'm keeping low from now on but I'm gonna do what I need to do.  Money is no object.  There is always the "pain and sufferring" issue that needs to be addressed.

As far as getting in touch with the mods at the other site, forget about it.  One of them was mirroring the same threat the Lizard was issuing here.

Enjoyful

Haha sure, Alpal.  I actually have a locked stick cabinet.  Wouldn't want them to get into the wrong hands, though it seems that one might have...

E

Enjoyful

(((Blue)))

You've got my support, Blue.

Anonymous

bluedahlia wrote:

 Are you saying we should have let them stand?

That's what you are asking for when you ask to have the Report this Post function removed.  There are consequences to actions. 

If those posts bothered you to the point where you could not stand to have them remain on the board until the moderator got around to dealing with them, then maybe some other posts bother other women just as much.  Those women then get to have you, and several others verbally attack them, and call them nasty names for doing exactly what you did. 

The rules here apply to all equally.  There is no special protected viewpont. 

bluedahlia

Thank you E.  I didn't go through a dangerous brain surgery to let it get unraveled by a few heartless women.  Stress iss kryptonite to PD suffferers regardless of any intervention, be it surgical or medicinal.  I'll be here but not posting much.  Need to regroup.

konakat

I'm sorry Blue.  And they probably don't give a rat's ass.  Miserable <fill-in-the-blank>.

Alpal

I don't think any of the regulars made the suggestion to remove the report function. Personally, I'm totally against it being removed. It needs to be changed to show who reports and why they reported.

Enjoyful

Understood, blue.  None of us need this stuff, least of all you.

pip57

Pat, I think you are confusing the usual name calling and put downs, that most of us simply ignore, with personal accusations of illegal activity.  Apples and oranges.  All of it is immature and unnecessary.

Blue, sorry that you have had to endure all this.   

Enjoyful

I thought she was referring to the Report abuses in her original post?  Can't see any after that.

Doesn't matter.  Hopefully we can all ignore the bad and accept the good and useful.

bluedahlia

Poor Jim must be rolling in his grave.

Medigal

Blue:  I am so sorry some heartless actions by certain posters have caused you more stress and pain.  Some people have no sensitivity to other's pain.   I will miss your regular posts but know your health comes first.  Take care and return to us when you can.  I became a part of this group to get my mine off of the stress in my life with other medical problems and I agree we don't need extra stress from here.  I do hope we can have some peace now.

Beesie

PLEASE PLEASE let's not remove the "Report this Post" button.  We get some ugly spam (offensive language, particularly towards women who have BC), we get some concerning spam ("cures" for BC or spam that is intended to draw women from this site to another site that has been set up for promotional purposes only) and we get some annoying spam (urls to buy Nikes, etcs.) The last type of spam is okay to stay around until the Mods or tech support has a chance to delete it, but the other two types of spam need to be removed as soon as they show up.  Since weekends are when this type of spam is usually posted, without the Report this Post button, these posts might stay on the board for 48 or 72 hours.  That is not acceptable - particularly for newbies who are most vulnerable.

Prior to the establishment of the Report this Post button, some spammers knew that this site wasn't protected and the garbage we used to see was unbelievable.  With newbies now restricted to 5 posts, we can't get flooded with this type of horrible spam the way that we used to but I still don't think that leaving up even 5 of these offensive posts makes sense.

So please let's not get rid of the Report this Post button.  It was put in place for a specific purpose and it very effectively addresses that purpose. The problem is that the Report this Post button is being misused.  Let's address the abuse - let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater (not an expression I like but rather appropriate here).

As I've suggested several times before, there are a number of options that should be effective at eliminating the abuse:

1. Posting the names of the deleters.
2. Not allowing the posts of legitimate members of the board (let's say someone with 50 posts or more) to be deleted.
3. Not enabling the "Report this Post" button for newbies.

Let's solve the problem, not create a new one by eliminating the Report this Post button completely.  

AnneW

I like your ideas, Beesie. It can't be THAT hard for the techies to implement those featueres!

Anonymous

deleted by sunflowers

Moderators

Yes, that is our concern as well. The spam had been completely out of hand awhile back, despite our spam filters.

Great ideas! Thank you.

althea

I agree with Beesie about leaving the report button available to us for eliminating spam.  It's the original intent for the function and spammers would have a field day here without it.  I think Beesie's suggestions would not eliminate the abuse occurring here, but they could go a long way in protecting people against unfair banning from the boards. 

I think it's beyond description that someone with a nefarious agenda can come in as a new user and have the ability to block out established, legitimate users of this site. From the very beginning, I've believed 5 reports is way too low of a number for this kind of action.  In some areas that get less traffic, spam could potentially sit around too long, in which case the brussel sprouts concept mentioned earlier in this thread could be used to activate a self appointed spam posse.  

Even just one of these suggestions could go a long way to protect members here who need it -- don't let newbies have access to the report button.  

Bren-2007

((((  Blue ))))) I worry about you and the stress on your Parkinson's.  I hope you're okay today, or at least getting better and not in a lot of pain.

love you,

Bren

althea

I'd like to take this opportunity to repeat one more time a suggestion I've made before.  We need a LOCK feature that the mods can use to shut down a thread that has spiraled into uglydom.  It would allow the thread to remain visible but no new entries are allowed onto a locked thread. 

I'm not a fan of such threads being deleted.  I'd rather decide for MYSELF whose words I find offensive, and sometimes you don't always see people's true colors in settings where everyone's on their best behavior.  Melissa asked a few pages back that everyone take a deep breath and make a fresh start in a new thread.  With a LOCK button at her disposal, she could insist instead of ask.  

I'd also like to take Beesie's second suggestion and offer a spinoff.  Instead of making those with 50 or more posts immune from reporting, I wonder if the techies could add a version of the 'thumbs down' in other platforms that reads something like "xxx members find this post offensive, please consider rephrasing".  

Bren-2007

I think if the names of those using the "report" function were posted at the same time the function was used, it would clear up a lot of this mess.  I've reported spam before and have no problem seeing my name as someone who reported it.

Bren

-angel-

Beesie, Ideas I've mentioned elsewhere as well except for #2.  I disagree with that only because I've seen some very nasty and damaging posts by several established members of this board that have harmed innocent members.  Also, with having the names published of those reporting a post and possibly the reason for doing so, along with not allowing new members to report posts, should help deter the deleters.  As far as when a member is no longer new, I'd put it at 6 months to a year.  I also like the idea of disabling inactive accounts with no recent login and 0 posts at 6 months, first with an email informing them their account will be disabled if they don't log on and or post in a given time frame.  There are a lot of great ideas on the Fellow Deletees thread under the Comments, Suggestions, .. Forum!

edited to clarify which Fellow Deletees thread I was referring to since this is also one! 

-angel-

Althea, good idea regarding the "thumbs down" option and nicely asking the poster to consider rephrasing the post!  It would be interesting to see that in action.  Also, I love seeing true colors.  I can't stand two-faced fake people!

ADK

I agree that the key is disclosing who is reporting.  I also agree that new users have no reason to report a post and until they can post freely, they cannot report a post.  When we have an incident like the other night, lizard in her 3 logins wouldn't care that she was disclosed as the reporter, so, she should not have had the ability to report at all.  I do remember when we had a post rating system on BCO, folks used that anonomously the same way they are currently using the report this post button.  People did get hurt feelings because a good post would be downrated because the poster wasn't liked by certain other people.  That is why (I think) BCO left it out in the revamp they did.  I do remember the spam and we really don't want to go back to that.  There were entire weekends when no one could post anything because the boards were so overrun.

I am not sure how I feel about giving people with more than 50 posts protection from being deleted.  If a spammer decides to wait out the 10 days and 5 posts per day by making legitimate inquiries, once they hit the 50, they would be free to post everywhere and not get deleted.  If the number were higher, I would feel better, but I don't know what the number should be.  Just thinking out loud.

BarbaraA

I am all for publishing the names of the deleters and require a reason also.

leggo

I'm confused. How would not allowing new members to "report this post" help anything? (I mean, other than new identity after new identity.)  Why punish newbies? That seems unfair. Truly though, if you're not harrassed through posts, you'd probably be harrassed through pm's, so again, why is the ignore feature not used more? I don't get it.

Edited: because other issue was already adressed.

-angel-

Anne, I completely agree.  The number has to be quite a bit higher than 50 posts.