Does anyone besides me hate the holidays?

barbe1958

Actually Nancy, that sounds like my kind of party! I have trouble staying up late, usually in bed by 9.

Merilee

barbe1958

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHHAHAHAHA

GramE

I did get some gifts wrapped yesterday - what I thought was a pretty snowman paper.  Dang it, this morning they were all unwrapped, due to the fact that the scotch tape doesn't stick to it.   Not cheap scotch tape, but the real Scotch Brand.   Now I have to redo them all with ribbons or maybe Duct Tape... lol !!    `

barbe1958

Nancy.....did you have the sticky side down?

KLee

I have mixed feelings about the holidays. My childhood memories were mostly good, until the years after my Dad died, and they were pretty special when my kids were young. I hate the commercialization of christmas, and try to hold onto the spirit of what it really means, but its hard. Putting up the tree, decorating, shopping for just the right gifts, and then wrapping them all just seems like one endless CHORE after another. When the kids were younger, the holidays were a rat race, office xmas parties, school parties, traveling to relatives homes, church...now, we don't do any of that. We are home, no one invites us anywhere, and for the past 2 years, my son & his family aren't able to be here with us. He is in the Navy, and although he does get leave, unless my husband foots the entire bill for them to come home, they aren't able to. Its just not the same without all my kids here together. At times throughout these years, I have thought, gee, maybe this might be your last Christmas, but actually not really believing that. This year however, it actually seems true. I have been getting weekly tx of Taxotere for the past 2 months, and so far it isn't doing anything to shrink all the many tumors everywhere. I have impending kidney surgery right after the holidays...boy, can't wait for that either.Even as sick as I am now, I have still had to do it all - pay the bills, decorate, shopping, wrapping, shipping, cooking, cleaning, and all this on the 2-3 days a week I might be able to get out of bed. With the money we spend on everyone (kids, grandkids), and we give to them ALL year long...we could go on a very nice vacation for weeks, but No, that would be selfish!

Marple

Thanks for the good chuckle Merilee re: The white Christmas.

Edit to add, the peeing Santa is pretty funny too.

Marple

Wrapping tips for KLee

kmccraw423

I haven't been here in a while and I really would love to hug each and everyone of you.  I want to enjoy the upcoming holidays and do only things that make me feel good; unfortunately, that means away from my family!  I, too, am single but its not just that.  Half of my family is on antidepressants and the half really needs to beI  I go to the family dinners because I love to watch the children opening presents.  There are only 4 in our immediate family so there is not a lot of screaming and running around.

My early childhood Christmas memories of someone in the family having a meltdown.  For years thought I was an extravert, seems I am truly an introvert who has learned to cover it with learned behavior.  Therefore; being around a lot of people drains me.

Klee - I say be selfish - you deserve it!

Merilee - you are a card!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, this might be good advice for all of us .....

NativeMainer

KLee--I hear you about the chores of shopping, wrapping, decorating, etc.  All that time, work, and energy put out for a few minutes on Christmas day.  I'd much rather just have a nice dinner and visit with the family and skip the whole present thing. 

Sharon--I think I'm going to use duct tape for my wrapping this year!  I've got a roll of pink duct tape that will work just fine!   

konakat

Christmas day is going to suck big ones.  My b/f lives at his sister's and she doesn't like stay-over guests.  So, I'll be in a hotel.  The bummer is that my b/f will probably be asleep at his sister's when I arrive since he has to work on the 26th at 7AM.  So I'll be driving down on the 25th and have to bring sandwiches or something (chocolate!) because the hotel is small and won't have any food there.  Won't be able to have my usual pitstop at MacDonald's when I cross the border.  Oh well...  At least I'll be able to avoid all the usual Christmas stuff...

barbe1958

Hate to say it, but why bother?????? You have US now!

konakat

Haha!  Well, my b/f can do things that I can't get through the website.   And I get a present!   And I still have a couple of trips to do to pick up stuff in storage anyway.     Otherwise...

Edit to add:  And I miss him a bit.

barbe1958

You're going to miss US more....just saying....

konakat

Probably!!!!!   I think Chloe (cat) misses him though...  

Merilee

Konakat-thought you were spending the holidays with George.

konakat

Ooooh, baby!  If the light is a bit low and I squint my eyes my b/f can pass for George.  He's (b/f) is a yummy Sicilian (gorgeous salt and peppa hair, muscly...) and worth the drive.  I wonder if he'll let me call him George?

Merilee

HA!

barbe1958

Can I come with you?

Merilee

Here's your Christmas present Barbe...remember who loves you LOL

Merilee

barbe1958

GramE

I was going to complain that I now have to do ALL the cooking at my apartment, transport it to my son's, even bring dessert, but I was told this is the start of a "family tradition"...   My apartment is too small to have everyone without someone eating off a tv tray, so we go to the big house and I pay for, cook and bring it all to them.   Correction:  not ALL, but the main course, appetizers, dessert.    

I am grateful I can afford it (next year may be another story), a place to cook it ( I am not homeless), a car (although 10 years old) to transport it, a family who expects me and invited me and includes me (not alone), and the ability to pray for patience and strength and to be able to enjoy the time together (my faith is strong).     

barbe, I had the sticky side down, but the paper had foil and apparently I need to use duct tape.   I did rewrap and used ribbon and all looks pretty good, if I say so myself.  

Thanks for letting me vent.  Only one more week and I can breath a sign of relief and take a very long nap.   Hugs,   Nancy 

Merilee

barbe1958

Funnier still, I actually love fruitcake! Figures...

NativeMainer

I've always like fruitcake, never could understand the to do about it.  If it gets too dry I just dunk it into some rum or such--yum!

konakat

I love fruitcake too!

otter

I was going to post something gloomy about holidays, but you guys are making me laugh too much.  Anyway, mostly my holidays are happy, because we spend a good bit of the time with my dh's family.  I love being around my MIL, my BIL and his family, and my stepson and daughter-in-law with our granddaughter. No one is snarky or self-centered -- everyone is friendly and polite, regardless of the baggage they're carrying around the rest of the time.

Okay... There was always so much tension and hostility in my own family's household that I dreaded going there for the holidays. For more than a decade, I had to wait until the very last minute to lock in my travel plans, even though I lived nearly 1,300 miles away and had just 20 days of vacation per year.  That was because there was someone else in the family whose planning and scheduling priorities always seemed to trump mine.  So things got stressful a month ahead of time as I would watch those airfares climb but could not make reservations yet... 

Once I arrived, everything revolved around one particular person, whose happiness or unhappiness governed everything that the rest of us did and how we were supposed to feel.  If she was unhappy, I was not being sympathetic enough.  If she felt hurt, it was likely my fault.  If she was mad at another relative for something that was said or done many years ago, we would not visit that relative over the holidays.  If she had decided we were not exchanging gifts that year, I was scolded if I brought a small gift for everyone.  And, if I "left the scene" during an argument (thus avoiding saying something I would regret), I was pursued to the other end of the house, and even beyond a closed door, to be reprimanded for running out on the argument.

This went on until I finally sought professional help.  I was advised to come up with an escape strategy; and to leave the house, for hours if necessary, until things calmed down.  Things never calmed down, of course -- I would be met at the door by angry family members when I returned.  But, at least the escape strategy gave me a sense of empowerment.  I did not have to sit there and be badgered, or join in the hostility.  Once dh and I started driving to those gatherings instead of flying, my situation got even better; because we could bail out completely by packing up the car and leaving ... or just threatening to do that. Talk about empowerment!

Thanks for the laughs. I no longer hate the holidays, but they are still stressful.  It's better for me if I start picking out gifts months ahead of time, and wrapping them early.  It gets me in a cheerful, generous mood well ahead of time.  Sometimes I can hold onto that mood through the whole holiday period.

otter 

NativeMainer

otter--an escape strategy is a great idea!  Being able to up and leave must be such a relief when the atmosphere gets tense and unhappy.  There is some truly funny stuff on this thread, that's for sure.  I decided to cut way back this year on Christmas stuff.  I've been picky about the parties I go to and have found myself actually enjoying them for the first time in years!  What a difference not being exhausted makes!

GramE

When my DH was alive we had a code word when it was time to "escape".    I have used things like " I forgot my pills and have to get home so I can take them".   No one can argue with that.  If I had a pet, I could say it is time to take Muffy or Fluffy for his/her walk, but I only have dust bunnies...

I enjoy the sense of humor thrown in on this thread.   Have a great weekend.   As of noon, we had 14 inches of snow and no one in their right mind is out and about.   Hugs, Nancy