MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

barsco1963

Awsome tune Ossa! One of my favs.

Edited - Just noticed the picture Eli posted at the top of the page. Love it!

heartnsoul76

Thank you ladies, for understanding how hard it is to take care of my mother.  And just living with her - I'm her favorite target.  I thought about moving away, far away, many years ago but a doctor told me "You can't run away from your problems." What bad advice - you can and I should have.  But I listened to him - I just had that many more years of abuse. I tell my son don't believe it if someone ever says that to you, lol.

Perfect picture Eli and perfect lyrics Ossa.  This is so tragic.  My heart is breaking for all of Boston.  Last I heard everybody in Boston has to stay in their houses.  I hope they catch the guy alive to find out what the hell their objective was.

Momine

Heartnsoul, I hear you. You can't run away from your problems, that is true. But you sure as &*($ can run away from the people who cause your problems. There is a reason I do not live in the country where I grew up, and it has worked pretty well for me.

heartnsoul76

Funny and true, Momine! You were a smart girl to get away. Even though my mother is now 86 she's just mean enough to live to 100 - maybe I should still leave, haha!

elimar86861

HnS76, I have always thought that when we care for our parents (as ornery as they may or may not be) it is the template and teaching tool for our children to learn by.  Guess what I am saying is, you are not suffering in vain, and that there is an upside.  I know you have a son and he sees how you step up and care for your parent.  She may not deserve all that you give her, but you will deserve good care when you are elderly AND your son will have had a lesson, first hand, on how to do that. 

It is definitely not right for her to target you with her spite and frustrations.  I know it is hard to balance a sense of duty and at the same time a disire to just avoid the whole situation.  Don't let it get to you too much.  If you know you are doing your best for her (and she fails to acknowledge that) then do something nice for yourself, because you DO deserve it.

heartnsoul76

You're right, Elimar. After reading your post, I was inspired to call my mother. I have two brothers and they don't like talking on the phone, so I'm the only one who really calls her.  I do it to try to keep her engaged with the world. Even then she'll say, "I have to go. I don't feel good."  But it's good for her for me to pester her, so I do it and I take it.  She was pretty conversational this time.

Jo - I meant to tell you that she was discharged and they found nothing wrong with her except high blood pressure and we're supposed to hire PT for her when she got home.  She hasn't let us do that yet, but we're working on it.

Yes, our kids learn from observing us.  Hence, my son always says "I hurt all over", haha.  But he really is learning from watching me push on through the abuse to do what's right.  One time he said, "poor nurses" that she was abusing and "poor other patients" that she was abusing and I finally said, "What about poor me?" and a light went off in his head and he realized as bad as it was for the others, it was harder on me.  Now he tries to step up and do what needs to be done because he knows she won't be abusive to him.  This has definitely been a learning experience for him and one day he'll be grateful that I seldom cuss, haha.

The other day I made him save a caterpillar he threw on the sidewalk.  He was whining about backtracking 50 steps and I said but he's going to get cooked on that sidewalk.  So he went back and found him and put him on a leaf and I said, "Now don't you feel better?" and he said, "Well yeah. After you made me feel all guilty I do feel better", haha!  But I bet he's always going to do that now, just like Mom.

elimar86861

Heart, May you never have another moth-eaten sweater again, either. 

Ossa

Eli.. love the header.. So happy it is over in Boston, now time for healing and closure

marlegal

HnS, your son sounds like such a great kid...good job



Eli, loooove the page topper (imagine). And loved watching live last night as they captured the other bomber. There were three of us here and we all spontaneously stood and clapped.



Curious...am I the only one who sees Ossa's picture as sideways? I realize it's the weekend and I've been known to have a drink or fifty on weekends, but even I don't start this early so I don't think that's why!

jocanuck1951

So funny marlegal...I think it depends on her mood....Ossa? 1 to 50 huh...hmmm really wish is didn't have liver mets....in the summer at my place couple times a week I fling open the garage doors at night and have trailer trash parties with all the gals, no men! So much fun, and great wine...bit noisy but hey it's the neighbors so.....lolol. What the hell am I going to do...pretend wine..crap! Xoxox.



We clapped last night as well!!!!! Jo

Dianarose

I have been reading trying to catch up on all the news and gossip. I took a vacation to NC to see my daughter and granddaughters. I had never flown before so my doc told me to take 4 Xanax. Not a good idea for a light weight who isn't used to meds other than chemo and steroids. I don't remember getting off the plane or my luggage. I remember waiting outside for my son in-law and I was seeing double of everything. I passed out in his truck for 2 hrs. Didn't do that on the way home. The weather was great. Shorts and flip flops. My ex invited himself along and got drunk and way to friendly. He knows where he stands now. I totally lost it. His wife (my best friend) passed away only 2 months ago. What an ass.

Welcome to all the new gals and sorry you are here.

Eli- glad you are still posting. It's just not the same without you. I am so sorry you have to do the dam chemo again. I am 5 months PFC and I try not to even think about it. My hair is now thick and really curly. I don't know if you will lose your hair on the chemo you are on, but I started using the Nioxin products prior to chemo and still do and you would never know I lost my hair.

Back to reality and back to work. My boss is really a nasty person. She has been mean and talks down to us all the time. I didn't get my vacation pay and was told if I want it I had to give her all my recipes (I work as a pastry chef and all the recipes are my own). She can kiss my ass. I went to the labor board and explained what was going on. They are not going to do anything until I tell them to. I got part of my pay. It was 100.00 shy. I took my recipe book and replaced the ones she wanted with some really screwed up ingredients. If she happens to get to the book while I am with a customer or in the bathroom she can have at them. The ones she wants are in my head anyways. The ones in the book now are not even close. A co-worker and I have found a place that is just about turnkey and will be available in a few weeks. We are going to start our own bakery and cafe'. I already have a wholesale company waiting for some of my products. They are renovating the old mills by where this rent is into apartments upstairs and business units on the first floor so we will have plenty of business. Keeping with the theme of the mills we are calling our place The Flour Mill bakery and Cafe'. We are making everything from scratch, bagels, english muffins, breads, pies, muffins, etc... We will be doing dinners to go 3-4 nights a week and soups, salads, and sandwiches for lunch. I am all done working for crazy, nasty, people.

I hope everyone has a great weekend. It was good to read everyone's posts. I missed my BC family while I was away.

barsco1963

LOL Diana -I do hope your boss tries to get some of those mixed up recipes. Too funny. Congrats on opening your own place. I am sure it will do AWESOME! I sure wish I lived closer to you. I would stop by everyday for a homemade treat!

Ossa

marlegal.. I am sideways??? hmm been feeling a bit off lately  

Jo.. you might be right depends on my mood...

Dianarose.. too funny.. good for you for sterting up your own bakery with coworkers

barsco1963

Ossa - you look ok to me. Not sure what marlegal has been up to - lol

Eph3_12

she admitted to being a tad in the cups I too wish I was in Maine to visit Dianarose, especially on opening day!  Best of luck!

Momine

Diana, way to go on the cafe. I love the idea and the name.

NativeMainer

Dianarose--Hooray for you!  And good for you for swapping out the recipe book.  Where abouts/what town are you in?  I may have to take trip to that area sometime in the next few weeks.  Or maybe you'll do some mail order????  Also good that your ex knows where he stands with you. 

Ossa--you don't look sideways to me, but then I'm sober. . .

elimar86861

What?  Ossa looks right side up to me? 

Diana, when you were telling your story, my mind immediately went to plotting about making bogus, awful recipes.  GOOD FOR YOU to actually do that.  That is so crazy bad that she was withholding your pay.  What a fabulous opportunity to break away and start your own bakery business and may it prosper in its heavenly aroma and mouth watering deliciousness. 

barsco1963

Ok - I think it's time for marlegal to fess up! Perhaps she has lost count after #50?

C'mn marle - pick your head up off the table and grab a cuppa joe. Let us know when Ossa becomes less of a side show for you - LOL

Dianarose

The bakery/cafe is going to be in Sanford Maine. It is a lot of work just to get the permits and inspections. There are a few items we are searching for that aren't included. Commercial mixers are costly, but a must.

Ossa

I am blushing, not used to all this attention

Dianarose

Me with my youngest granddaughter Lydia when I was in NC. I miss her. She is such a happy baby.

Dianarose

My oldest granddaughter, Katiana, holding Lydia. I bunked with her in her room. We stayed up late laughing and joking. She said I was her best friend. Brought tears to my eyes. It was hard to leave them.

Dianarose

This is the 2 1/2 yr old terror Abby although she looks innocent. ok, done showing off the grandkids. Found out the day I got back that I will be getting grandson #1 in September.

jocanuck1951

Beautiful babies from a beautiful grandmother! Wish you the best Dianarose! Don't be surprised if you get a Canuck for a visiter in your new bakery! Xoxoxo Jo

Dianarose

Thanks Jo. When I was diagnosed this last time I was so depressed that I totally gave up on any dreams. When my best friend (who was healty as a horse) died suddenly in February I realized that having cancer or not does not guarantee how long we will be around so I am moving forward.

Question- for anyone who has had dam TE's do you still feel like you have aliens in your chest after the exchange? I have had these dam things in for a yr now. My exchange is in June and I hope they don't feel as weird as the TE's.

NativeMainer

Georgeous girls, and CONGRATS on grand-son-to-be!

luvmygoats

Dianarose - Your grandkids are gorgeous and congrats on grandson #1 to come.  Wish Texas were closer to Maine.  I'm drooling.  You make me want to bake.  I know it will all come thru for you.  Do people travel thru Sanford to get to the shore?  I see by the map close to Kennebunkport.  Sounds like a good time for a new bakery with summer on its way.

Ossa - you were never sideways to me but then I'm not under the table as Marlegal trying to peer over the edge.

Hope someone replies about the TEs but all I've read on here that alien feeling if not totally gone is MUCH improved.  I think if I'd had them for a year I would def. want them GONE NOW.

Dianarose

Just made some Hawaiian sweet bread. Soft with just a hint of sweetness from the pineapple juice in the recipe.

Sanford is about 30 minutes to the coast and there are a lot of lakes inland, so the best of both worlds.

macatacmv

hey Diana, what cute grandbabies and then to have one you can actually converse and laugh with, it's really great you got to visit. Good luck with getting all the permits and such straightened out. Running your own business is lots of work but very rewarding.

One good thing about the lock down in Btown this week was I was able to get a hold of my MO. I get to take a break from my AI for a month. Yahoo!!!!! She made it very clear that I will have to take some sort of meds, but I was through with "toughing it out" on this one.

OK enough with the food pics. I am starting the clear liquid diet in the morning in prep for my colonoscopy on Tuesday. I've had one before so no real big deal. I think I will have had every system in my body checked out after this one. 

Oh man, I just had to call my DD in CO after I saw on the news about the avalanche that killed some snow boarders. It was where she was riding last week. But she had been doing some retail therapy with a friend today. Whew! This world is a scary place lately.