MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

Lily55

I have done that too and even now can get out somewhere and then need to rush back home - it sucks, BC seems to rule everything - was told about a book called Dancing in Limbo for people trying to live after treatment so hoping that helps me so if you are a fruit loop i am too

Momine

Eli,  No, have not had those either, and although I do not live in the US now, I did live there for a good 15 years or so. We did not have junk food as kids, and I never developed a taste for it as an adult. There are a few things I like, corn chips, for example, but I have some maybe once every 2-3 years.

Lynn, There is absolutely NO reason you should put up with that from your brother. I am like you, btw, ever since cancer I can't deal with seriously self-destructive behavior. It makes me very upset and downright cranky.

Jlynn0807

Momine....I'm not.  Promised self this am.  He's got a choice.  I don't.  So be it. If his choice is total self-destruction.....I cannot deal with it right now. Now, if I find out my boys are smoking....you will all hear my wrath from wherever corners of the Earth you happen to be!!

I have taken my onc's words very seriously. He told me NOT to touch the liquid glue over my port incision areas, no matter how tempting.  That said, I have a very unbecoming "dirt hickey" on my neck.  Getting rather obvious.  While a very clean woman, I am scared to touch it.  Tried rubbing a little soap on it, and letting the water run over the area, but it seems to have become one with my skin.

Any takers?

yuck.

Lily55

I am a bullshit free zone now and self destructive behaviour gets me mad so am with you 100%

Jlynn0807

I type very fast, so this "stuff" I am posting isn't as big a deal as you think in terms of time taking.  Out of shower, and putting on some make-up. 

Got to thinking of something.  The other night, Friday, I was racing from the onc's office to my son's wrestling match.  I was driving.  Husband in passenger seat, although sometimes I'd like to stuff his "suggestive" self in the trunk.  Anyway, he says...you know the speed limit is 35 here?  I said, I don't care.  He said, whatcha gonna do if you get pulled over?  I said, break down in tears, tell the cop I have cancer, show him my port if I have to, (ya know...flash em a little)...and plead that the ticket could cost me 100's I could use on anti-depressants instead.  He said, you wouldn't.  I said....Ok.  Believe that I am more "decent" than that. 

Girls, I would.  I used to use my looks to get out of tix.  Now, going to use cancer.  HA!  Disclaimer....*I swear I am a good, decent person with a smile for everyone.  I love animals, and old people, and help everyone I can.  That makes me somewhat decent, so gonna forgive self for the "no tix officer...I have cancer....how COULD YOU????"

Isn't life funny sometimes.  I guess it's how we evolve that counts.  I do still have some sense of humour, because ya gotta I think or you'll go crazy in the wee hours of the am when you're thinking to yourself that you have an advantage over everyone else....they don't know how they're going to die...I now pretty much do, unless I get hit by a truck or some other unlikely event.  So, I'm thinking I've an advantage.  Gotta take what I can get!

Still working on that Kohl's trip.  He just told me he'd be ready in 15 mins.  That makes one of ya.

Ut-oh.  I hear him coming. 

elimar86861

carollynn79,  Looks fabulous out on Kauai.  Love those classic sunset shots, and your seal buddy.  Thanks for sharing!

Momine, I will never forgive your parents for depriving you of the orange-y goodness of the Cheetos; however, your nutritional eating could earn you the annual Middie Clean Living award (provided we ever get around to having a sensible award like that.)

Jlynn, Are you on the thin side?  I am not sure if that makes any difference, but I am thin and my port protrudes and is quite noticeable.  It was sore for a good two weeks, only becoming ignorable after about a month.  I think if it can nestle into some body tissue, it may get comfortable faster.  Now you may have heard of numbing creams that they can use before your port stick (and you might like to get one) but when I found out it was yet another prescription to buy, I decided to suck it up and just take the stick head on.  Well, yow, the first couple times it did cause about 3 seconds of pain; then I got a nurse who actually was good at the insertion of the needle and it didn't even hurt for a split second.  After that, I told the next nurses to do it the painless way.  They liked to say, "Well, it might hurt just a little." "Not if you do it the right way," was my sassy, yet true, reply.

Momine

LOL, my mom was a complete food nazi. She even confiscated the chocolate our grandma brought us for Christmas. My daughter thinks I was a food nazi too, but I was totally laid back compared to my own mom.

I had to laugh though when one year, as we were in the airport about to go back to NY, my mother took my then 2yo kid to the store. They were in there a while, and then the kid came out, triumphantly wielding a giant thing of smarties with a Donald Duck figure on the lid (we were not really allowed cartoons and comics either, except for French ones). Amazing how the grandkids completely addle grandma's value system.

Thing is, all that clean living did not save me from the stupid cancer, so what good can it really be?

elimar86861

Momine, You might also qualify for the Randomness of Cancer Award, but the competition is very steep for that one, as so many of us had very few risk factors to begin with.  Your mom is SO cutting edge...wasn't there a new report out that the pink Smarties fight heart disease and the purple have anti-Cancer properties?  No?  What are the scientists waiting for???

Jlynn0807

El, yes, I am on the thin side, and yes, it does stick out, and yes, she did stick in right where my bra strap falls...smack on top of it, even though she clearly said she was going to "avoid bra line areas, so one less thing for you to think about".  I do have the Emla cream, cuz I'm a big big needle baby....high five to you for taking it like you did.  I begged for cream!!  I'm tough with pain, very.  Bad with needles.....very bad!

elimar86861

Yeah, mine is RIGHT under the bra strap.  I have to loosen the strap so that it barely is supporting otherwise it rubs.  However, it is in the perfect spot to be hiddent when I wear a tank top in summer.

barsco1963

Eli - love the crocuses....can't wait for spring!

Dianarose

Eli- I was itchy during chemo as well. Mostly my neck and feet. It drove me crazy. It would come and go. I thought it was nerves doing it.

With all the talk about ports I am glad I didn't have to have one. They used the same vein each time and it held up.

Well my 13 yr has put together the 91 pie boxes and I have all the ingredients. Will start tomorrow with this project. My kitchen looks like a pie factory right now. I have never met the man the money is being raised for, but I did talk to my brother tonight and he said the man, Brad, has a brain tumor located behind his sinuses and is not operable. When he finishes his chemo is has to have radiation, but the center is too far to travel so he has to stay in a hotel. This is what we are raising the money for. I have really great brothers who helped me the past yr so it is nice to give back.

Well it's almost time for Once Upon A Time. I love this show. Does anyone else watch it?

barsco1963

Dianarose - that is a lot of giving back. Kudos to you for taking on such a project. 91 pies is amazing. How long will it take you to finish them all. Are you baking them as well? What a delicious fundraising idea!

Dianarose

barsco- yes, I am baking them as well. A lot of them are one crust pies so that will help. I am going to start preparing the fillings tomorrow, bake on Tuesday and pipe the ones that have whipped cream on Wednesday when I get home from work.

barsco1963

Dianarose - phew. I am tired just thinking about all that baking. I almost feel guilty asking for a keylime pie for todays scan. Notice I said "almost" lol.

No coffee, no breakie, nothing for the belly before scan today. That's ok - always go for lunch with a sister or two, a cousin and an aunt on scan days! And all of the cheetos, pies, cinnamon rolls, strawberries and coffee/kahlua will surely keep me satiated till lunch time.

Hoping everyone has a great Monday!

elimar86861

barsco, how 'bout we kick off your pocket party with this...who doesn't love line drawings in their coffee?

                                              

Momine

Eli, thing is my mom was actually pretty cutting edge where food was concerned. She is too old to have been a hippy. By the time the hippies rolled around, she was already a suburban housewife with a couple of kids. But she went out of her way to find organic food, for example, long before it was a "thing." We often got meat from friends who had eco-farms. Now she is seriously into the locavore thing and baking her own sourdough rye bread. She and my dad also traveled a lot, and her mom was a very serious cook, so we ate a lot of things that were not common in Denmark in the 60s and 70s. My childhood was all kinds of messed up, but I have to say that we ate well and learned to cook well. It has definitely stayed with all of us.

elimar86861

Momine, Yes, but can you make drawings in coffee?  (Harhar!)  Seriously, because most of our eating habits are learned behavior, a conscientous mom or dad can really make a difference in the quality of our eating for life.

I noticed you also had fouorouracil (5-FU,) did you ever get itchy hives from it?  Like several singular ones, not a whole patch.  I had it during and for a month after my continuous, low dose 5-FU.

Meece

I was a conscientous mom.  My kids took courtesy bites of everything I cooked.  As a result I have kids who'll eat just about anything and all will happily eat their vegies! I appreciate what I did when I see my son's girlfriend's children eat.  My son doesn't understand why they won't eat things or cry when it is put on their plates.  Neither do I.

Now, as far as the coffee drawings...I think I'll leave that to the experts.

elimar86861

I must have read the same page in the mom manual, Meece.  I didn't call them courtesy bites, but even if I knew they "hated" a certain veggie, a teaspoonful went on their plates and they had to get it in somehow.  They say a kid has to eat somethings five times to develop a taste for it.  Did mine like the Brussels sprouts right away?  Heck no.  One used to try hiding them in his milk, but now they are a favorite of his.

Meece

When I married DH he had a limited taste for vegies.  I fixed dinners like I normally would and now DH loves about any vegies I fix.  WHn I'd ask him if he liked...asparagus..he'd say "no" then he'd say "Well, I've never had them".  I think his mom only fixed canned corn and green beans.

Momine

Eli, I have never tried to make cappucino art, but I draw reasonably well.

I agree about the eating habits. It may not seem like it is working while they are still young. Lord knows my kid bitched and moaned about all kinds of foods and had long periods of being picky and impossible, but I persevered as best I could. Now that she is in college, she cooks for all her friends, started a supper club the first year she was there and has become pretty adept at cooking cheap, healthy meals.

I don't think I got hives during the FEC. That one was the "easy" chemo for me. No real SEs other than being tired and inflamed veins (and that was from the red devil, not the fluorowatchamacallit). Taxotere was a different story. Not fun.

jocanuck1951

Barsco its been like 5 hours now.....are you glowing lol?



Eli I love coffee with pictures...what time you want me over? Lol



My nails....I have those funny looking chemo lines in them now..and they are splitting and hurt, just like my scalp..I can hear the brave new little hairs screaming help me help me...! Time for another buzz I guess!



I'm starting to dread Mondays...bloodwork, Tuesday chemo..Wednesday...well we won't go there....not liking this routine at all



So onco said start exercising a bit...ok...before cancer I would put my ipad on my walking machine and read at slight incline at 1.5mph slow but no stress on my sciatica so thought I'd try it again as I've gained 6lbs since chemo (even with dragon's breath!)



Now I feel yucky when I don't eat, yucky when I do eat and I'm slightly diabetic . So any suggestions? The big D with chemo and C on the other days....having so much fun here.....

elimar86861

JoC, My Cancer Center had a dietician and they also loaned out cookbooks.  My mom's center gave her the book Eating Well Through Cancer.  I tried a few recipes from there involving sweet potatoes.  The Banana, Rice, Applesauce, Toast diet is always mentioned and those bland foods suddenly can become your friends.  Eggs are easy to eat.  Yogurt is good for you.  Drink the Ensure if you like it.  I really tried to drink that (and my mom loved it) but it did not go down that well.  I think the vitamins in that formula irritated me.  Now I am going to add something "controversial" and add a few raw fruits.  I had to have some Clementines and I had some watermelon too.  It tasted very good.  These you are not supposed to have if your WBC is low.  Mine was never that low and I took the precaution of washing/scrubbing the outside of the fruit with soap (and rinsing, of course) before peeling or cutting into it.  (Melons have to be whole.)  Please don't take a chance if you get WBC neutropenia, but I think if you clean the outside of the fruits very well, the insides are o.k.

Eph3_12

I was going through chemo in the summer.  I never treated my fruits any different than normal-what I didn't know I guess didn't hurt me.

I wish there was an arty way to present Diet Coke!

barsco1963

Well ladies - I am back. Usually make a day of it by going out for lunch afterward. Thank goodness the PP snacks/drinks don't fill me up too much. Thanks for the company during scan time! Now we wait for results - should only be a couple of days. Cross those fingers, toes, eyes or what ever it takes!

Eli - love the coffee with the picture. Very cool! Jo - maybe we can deliver some to you tomorrow for chemo day.

Eph - maybe can't do pictures in coke but how about this elegant dispenser?

Eph3_12

sweet!

elimar86861

Is that in the Smithsonian?

Momine

Jo, treat food like medicine and make a schedule of reasonable foods at set times. As for the intestinal issues, probiotics, probiotics, probiotics. They will not completely eliminate issues, but they can really help. I normally take one acidophilus pill in the AM. During chemo I took one with every meal.

macatacmv

Hey everyone, well I was not through having fun, got pink eye in the good eye. LOL could only stare at the ceiling for a couple of days.

Lynn, I had to really watch who I talked to at first. I have an answering machine, plus caller id. I found I do not need to answer every call. At times when I had no energy I had a friend come over and listen to the messages for me, then return the important calls. I found that many friends really did want to help, just needed something to do. So I set them up to protect me.

Even today at the drug store as I am picking up my script for a stronger antib and pink eye cream the pharmacist (who is a friend) asked how I was doing. I just threw back my head and laughed (a very hoarse laugh) He laughed too.

barsco, glad you made it thro the scan, waiting with you for results.

good nite ladies.