2005 ROCK-TOBER CHEMO GIRLS

Graycie

Victoria, Your daughter is beautiful......

Paula15089

Cool map!!
I am on it now!

Anonymous

ravdeb -
I am wishing, hoping, praying, for the best results! I think we're all a little confused at Sunday being a normal business day in your part of the world! I bet the pink cheeks look adorable on you, but was wondering which cheeks you were referring too. LOL...

Victoria -
Your daughter is gorgeous...just like you!

Everyone -
Love ya, miss ya, really want to meet ya!

LOL

Laura

RoseMarie

Well, I lost my post when I went in search of these pictures...Oh well



We found a good home for "Rocky the Boxer" right before I had surgery last year. I couldn't handle the dog and my reality! My husband is the animal lover in our family -
Ok, well lots of love to all of you -
Sherry, good to see you!
Hope everyone has a great day! Thinking about you, MaryAnne and Ravdeb!!

ravdeb

Beautiful pictures! Victoria..you have a gorgeous daughter...do believe she takes after her mom

RoseMarie..what beautiful kids you have. Cute dog.

Paula..glad to see you on the map!

Well, the pink boob is now back to normal color and the pink cheeks (on my FACE LAURA!!!) are back to normal blah color as well. No more excitement there! Now just the wait to see what kind of changes or no changes going on in my vascular system.

Son did come home last night...late. But, he didn't come home from school today yet. Shoulda been home by now. I know he's alive because he's on his cell phone. But of course he won't answer it when I call him.

I actually love teenagers...but this one is giving me a run for my money! Victoria..that is some story about your daughter when she was 14! My son is 17. He should be over this stuff by now, don't ya think???

Went shopping for new boob holders (otherwise known as bras)because of my newly enlarged side. Oh..it's not THAT much bigger but enough to make it look like it's escaping its home, if you know what I mean.

I don't usually like it when the saleswomen want to help me fit the bra but since I'm in such good practice at showing off my "ladies" (mine are NOT girls...much more mature!), I let her help me and it did help. So, it was kind of like putting down a downpayment on a home, but I do believe this could help me because the bc one is aching me.

My bc girlfriend told me to watch it closely because she had that and her onc thought at first it was IBC and then lymphadema. It was lymphadema. So, I'm watching it..well..I'm not actually looking at it but I think you know what I mean.

TracySeattle

Hi Everyone!

Love all of the dog pics. I am such a dog lover. I saw my EX on Saturday--he told me that our middle dog, Kootenai who is a lab/retriver mix has been very sick - not eating and has lost 26 lbs. At first they could not find anything wrong with her, but Sat. afternoon, one of the tests showed a spot on her liver. I would imagine that he is going to have to have her put to sleep this week. In addition to all of the other "junk" I went thru this past year, I have lost two dogs that I have had for 10+ years..... It is so hard to loose our beloved pets. I am kinda glad that he is dealing with it (for both dogs) because I am not sure that I could handle it emotionally if I was having to make the decisions. I figure it is the least he can do.

Ravdeb - glad your tests are over, now we will just be waiting with you for the results...

MaryAnne - hope you enjoyed your party - it was fun to be able to keep you company!

Kelly - loved your story!

Hey everyone! Dave is mailing the CDs today for me!!! Jill and Paula - I still need to make yours, but thanks to Rosmarie I have your addresses now, so I will work on that!

Hey - guess what??? I think I am going to get to meet Cathy in January!!! She is coming to Seattle!!!

Well, off to work I go! Talk to all of you later!

TracyNY

Hey ladies! Nice photos. I really need to post mine though. My cabinet came and it is fabulous.

I'm getting ready for thanksgiving. Off to Atlanta for a few days then its under the canulla I go. I would have said knife but I'm getting sucked out, not cut off.

My arm is getting a bit better now that I have my sleeves. It is definitely a lot easier than all that pulaver I had to go through before and I keep them on longer than I did the bandages so I expect improvement soon.

Pictures will follow...

ravdeb

Tracy NY..you keep promising pictures but WHERE ARE THEY??? Glad you got your cabinet and you like it. Really glad your sleeve is helping you. Enjoy Atlanta.

Tracy in Seattle... I'm jealous that you get to meet Cathy! I hope that works out. Very cool.

When is somebody going to drop in on me in Israel??? Debbie..wanna come by balloon???

Sorry to hear about your dog,Tracy. That's awful. I worry about when Casey will come to her last days. She's getting so old and she doesn't eat like she used to. Eating was her life. Sleeping seems to be more her pasttime these days.

Am looking forward to the cd, Tracy! How very cool. Am still working on something for ya all. I do have a plan. Just gotta put it together!

My beach was sleepy today. Water was calm. And there were bus loads of people there visiting. Was a bit noisy. Not my usual empty beach.

debbie444

Ravdeb - dont joke - you know my track record. Guess what i won at work today - a stress ball! Hope its industrial strength!
I had my mammo today, OMG that hurt. They took 4 , then came out and said they needed more. It all came flooding back. Then they came out needing an ultrasound - it was really coming back atthis point. Glad Roger came with me or i may actually have left at this point. The ultra sound took ages - i really thought they had found something, she kept going over and over the same spot. I wasnt looking - i shut my eyes. She told us then that everything was OK, they had needed to check because of teh scarring. WHOOOOO!!
Sorry about the dog Tracey.
Debbie

TracySeattle

Sounds like a lot of us are experiencing problems with our first mammogram. I had the same experience that Debbie had where they kept wanting additional views and then did an ultrasound. I was in tears and re-living everything....

marymelodi

Nice catching up with you all. So glad to hear of your nice, normal lives. I had some upsetting news of two people I know who have been secretly having an affair for over a year and now the married one is breaking up her family, etc. It's hard because we've been friends with all of them and the lying and sneaking around has happened all this time. We are confused about how to stay friends without being judgmental when in our hearts we are shocked at the betrayal of one friend by two other friends. Really sad about the child involved who will (I think) become an object in a battle over custody. So sad, so sad.

Although the trauma of cancer is nothing to be dismissed, I don't know if I would want to experience the trauma that the husband in this drama must be feeling at the loss of his marriage, his wife, and maybe his child. They were together 20 years. Is it worse the be threatened as we were, as I was, by cancer or is it worse to lose the life you loved and people you loved? Today my heart is troubled and very sad about all this mess. It's hard to watch the wreckage of a good life.

Thanks for a place to express these thoughts.
Mary

Anonymous

marymelodi -
You have raised several very interesting questions. None of which there is a simple answer for. Dealing with a situation such as this is tough. Follow your heart...is the only advice I can offer. Life's twists and turns are so very difficult. I wish you the very best with this,,,and I wish the very best outcome for all involved.
Laura
Laura

linny

I can't believe I actually posted a picture, it took 40 minutes of trying, I am so NOT computer savy. Its from late spring 2006 with my grandson Moshe (not 10 months old) in New York. I don't even have a digital camera!! thank goodness my kids do.

Victoria, your daughter is stunning.

Ravdeb, I can only wear cotton bras, I cannot wear any underwire, or tight bra at all, my affected side is just too sore. My husband may be going to Israel for a few days at the end of December, and I had considered going along, but I feel like if I have free time, I want to be in New York, especially since my grandson Isaac may have his cochlear implant surgery around that time.

Linda

linny

Sorry, it should have said "now" 10 months old.

Anonymous

Victoria, your daughter sounds like a fun wild spirit ...... your daughter, of course!!

Marymelodi, I am sorry about your friends. It is hard when there is deceipt involved. Usually, I figure they are weak, not wicked. It's easier to believe that, for me.

TracyNY, hope your arm is getting better. How is your mom??

TracySeattle, sorry about your dog. Dogs are like children and it hurts to lose them. Can't wait for the cd!!!

Debbie, I know what you went thru. My experience probably scared the tech! It's very hard to relive our ordeal. Glad Sam is better.

Rosemarie, your children are always so fun to see in pics!

Ravdeb, did your son ever tell you where he went?? Does he realize how worried you were???

Linnie, your avatar is great, congrats on learning how to post a pic.

Paula, I remember seeing your photos before and checking my hair and it never grew as fast as yours.

MaryAnn, how are you? Does your hubby call you guys everday or do you do the internet live pic/telephone thing???

Laura, I have forgotten to tell you: my daughter wears her shirt ALOT. She loves it with her pink camoflauge pants!

Love to everyone ........

ravdeb

Linda...GREAT to see you with Moshe! How cute but hey..are you old enough to be a savta? (that's grandma in Hebrew). You look wonderful! And isn't it fun to accomplish that trick of posting???

Wish you were joining your husband in Israel! Where will he be staying?

I hear you about the underwires...I just bought new ones with underwires and it does hurt on the rib on that side. I loosened it up. It's okay. My rib is sore but won't always be, right???

Debbie..OMG..the mammo experience. I'm first of all so, so happy it was all clear and you can relax. But, I'm so sorry you had to experience it like that. They need to say what the heck they are doing. I ask. I don't let them mumble or not explain because not knowing scares me. I went in worried that the scar tissue would be a problem and that my boob would hurt something awful. Well, it hurt to the point of tears (and I take pain well) but the scar tissue wasn't a problem to them, which concerned me! The only thing that made me not worry was that I was scheduled for the ultra sound for the following week and felt that that would clear up anything that they couldn't see. But I was concerned that they didn't take more views. I have large breasts and I was reading some papers of mine and found out I have what they wrote.."fibrosis" (Victoria..help with that one..I've read..but what does that really mean?? It was in Hebrew but same word).

So now I wonder..where were the extra views? In March I go throught this again...

Victoria...that is a wonderful avatar! I think we should each have one with our t-shirts. I'm going to get my daughter to take a pic of me with my t-shirt and post that.

mary...I have no answers for you. It is terribly hurtful and I so believe in being honest. If there is a problem in the relationship, then it's time to talk it out, get some help and/or say goodbye. That's how I see it.

Sorry you are dealing with this with your friends.

Well, I finally slept last night! My son was home, I went to bed, slept straight through the night and right into the morning! Amazing!

I'm off for my walk on the beach.
Have a good day Ladies.

debbie444

Mary, i know its a bad situation to be in. It happened with some friends of ours. i worked with the woman and Roger was friends with the man. When it all turned nasty we found out that the woman had been running around with another man, telling us all tall stories. I am sad to say we took sides ( guess which one) but i dont tthink that my friend was the person i thought she was , if you see what i mean. Geoff has just remarried to a lovely woman and is somuch happier than he was before ( the woman who pretends she is scared to come and visit us as somuch happens here!!)
Linnie - nice to see you
Victoria - you look like the learning mentor at our school in the new pic - that was a shock to see !
Rosemarie , your pics are so cute!
Ravdeb - you are more patient than i am.!!
Ravdeb, dont want to upset you, but i think i must have missed about these tests, what are they for exactly?

Yesterday i asked for help changing the beds.
Now i realise why i do it myself - yes they are in there - can you see a foot?( thank goodness i didnt ask C to change a double duvet!!)

ravdeb

Debbie..that picture cracked me up!!!! of course, I'm not surprised the kids did that!!!!LOL.

My test..the CT angio was to take a better look at my vascular issue..not connected to my bc but my doctor wants to see it better because I had bc and she is concerned about the situation. I was diagnosed a few years ago with a dissected carotid artery on the left side and 40 -50% narrowing on the right side (this is the neck). I get followup ultrasounds every 4 - 6 months but the CT shows more so I had to have this. Hadn't had it in a while...a couple of years, I think.

scottishlass

Hello,
Popped myself on the map so the Debbies will not be so lonely on this side of the world.
Laura, Ravdeb and Debbie - glad the test have been achieved and the results are promising so far. I had my first test a month ago - and so I can relate that mammos are so painful. Looking on the bright side I only have one to mammo now so that is great !!!!!
I am starting to think about trying to find a new job - used to do contract work - you have to be on top of your game to do that and I am not near there yet. Perhaps a stepping stone is required - anyway am putting my thoughts into that.
I always read all the mails - even though it takes me some time to do - all my best wishes to everyone
Jill

Anonymous

Victoria, love your smiling face and Roctober shirt!! I am in my Roctober shirt but you can't see the words.

Debbie, your signature line about panic, chaos and disorder reminds me of my daughter. When I can't find something and am franticly looking for a tennis shoe or whatever, my daughter says, "First thing should do Momma: let's panic." It always calms right down.

Actually, yesterday, I was looking for a beach towel and she said, "Let's scream." I just started laughing. I can't believe some of the stuff she comes up with.

debbie444

Thats a cute pic Victoria. Who is Mrs Cleaver??
Taking Sam to the vets now, hope they will take his stitches and staples out today. He is quite mardy today, think we have spoilt him.
Yesterday i sent a kid in my class home as he was under the weather and a rash. His mum rang to thank us today as he is in hospital with suspected meningitis ! Makes the hairs on my neck stand up just thinking about it.

marymelodi

Hi everybody!
Debbie: Mrs. Clever was the stereotypical stay-at-home "MOM" in the 50's sitcom "Leave It To Beaver." Even back then I found it ridiculous that she would cook, vacuum, and do laundry in heels and pears . . no I mean, pearls. (Would have been more funny to swee her in pears!)The character was always pretty, calm, cultured, with perfect manners, cooking, and wisdom for her 2 sons and their dad. In the 80s there was a movie called "Airplane" and the woman who played the "Mrs. Clever" part did a bit where she turned the stereotype upside-down by talking in street jive with some African-American characters in the movie. The actress was probably being a really good sport about a role she never could live down as the so-called "perfect" mother figure.

What did you mean by saying Sam is quite "mardy"?

I'm so glad he is healing and getting back to normal. Of course you did spoil him. Whenever I tell my husband our 2 cats are spoiled he says, "No they're not. All cats smell like that." Yuck-yuck . . . he has a million bad puns and I "suffer" through them all.

Thanks for the angel I got in the mail . . . I have an even smaller one like it on my ID holder that I wear every day at work. Now I have angels around me all the time. It's good to have an angel. If my memory serve me well, I think there once was a movie called "An Angel In My Pocket." Or maybe I'm just dreaming that up. I know there is a movie called "Angels In The Outfield" about angels who help a baseball team to win.

Enough trivia . . back to work.
Mary

debbie444

I am working my way around angel wise, just have to find some more. I need some other addresses tho.
Debbie

ravdeb

I had the same question..what is "mardy"? I looked it up in my Oxford dictionary but it wasn't there!

Cracked me up that you, Debbie, didn't know who Mrs. Cleaver was. Nobody in Israel knows, either, and since this was a "before your time" sitcom anyway...really ages me! How I loved the Beaver! But, my dh who is my age but was born in Israel, had never heard of this show, either. They didn't even have TVs in Israel in those days! Hard to imagine life without TV! I was born with it.

Victoria..I will now check out that link. I love your picture with your dog and your pink shirt. I never wore pink until I was diagnosed. Suddenly it just became my color of choice! I love it. And now it looks good with my new white locks.

ravdeb

Jill..good luck with the job hunt. What kind of contract work were you doing?

TracySeattle

Ha! I used to hate pink, now I select it over any other color. Isn't that strange?

I stayed home from work today, woke up with a headache, tummy ache and sore throat. I am feeling better now. I think it was just one of those days where my body was telling me, "Oh, no you don't... You are staying right here.".

Debbie - I love my angel too, she travels with me. She will be heading to Texas on 12/2 to spend a week with my college room mates.

Linny and Michelle - do you want one of our Rocktober Girl CDs? PM me your addresses. I need to grab more CDs and get them made, but I can get them in the mail to you hopefully before the Holidays! I also have to make one for Jill and Paula. Haven't forgotten you all!

Even tho I am doing a few things today, I am trying to take it easy and rest. So, I will catch up with all of you later...

maryannecb

Hi All,

took my bowel prep, against everyones better judgement, even my own. I went to work until 1PM. It was kind of like having gastroenteritis but without the lousy feeling. I visited all threee toilets at work twice.LOL. Then carried on with the rest of the prep and liquid diet. Man oh man that diet is hard. By last night I would have eaten a shoe!

Gastro and colon done two hours ago. I have a hiatal hernia and some diverticular diease but all else is OK. Yeah! Did not mind the whole experience too much. I think I have no test I haven't done yet in my life eexcept an angiogram. Hope I naver need one of them! Thanks for worrying along with mr. I now pass the waiting for test baton on to...Ravdeb I guess.

Victoria I forgot to thank yuo for the Spa link. It was so relaxing..but I will only ever be a virtual guest there unless I win the Lotto. Your daughter sounds spirited. Glad you get along so well now. Teenagers can be a challenge.

Rosemarie your dog is almost as cute as your son. He has sych a beautful smile! Also if I am typing a long post or if I have to look back through other posts before I hit send, I always copy the entire message. Then after I hit send if the page has expired I open the reply window and paste the saved message. I don't lose anything any more.

Speaking of LE. During my daysurgery today I let them access my mastectomy arm...afterr 4 tries on my chemo arm things klkooked hopeless. Hope I don't regret that.

Tracy, thanks for your company over the weekend.

Debbie, your mammo experience sounds awful. Mine is not until January. Guess I should bring someone with me. Not that I will believe it anyway as it did not show my tumor.Kids are so helpful making beds.LOL.

Mary, I too had friends that had the same problem. In the beginning I felt betrayed. My good friend had not confided to me about the affair. She knew I guess that I do not think this a healthy thing to do. First I think it is immatture. If you are unhappy in your marriage, well try to fix it, if that doesn't work then break it down. The n you need time to find out what wnt wrong andtry to fix it so it won't happen again. Affairs cause so much grief to all parties. Even the"happy" new couple have tremendous challenges. With the couple I knew, it was my girkfrind I ended up supporting. She lost 95% of her friends and was socially ostracized. Interestingly her married partner had few changes with his friends. In our world there is a huge double standard.

I'd like to believe my friend fell deeply and passionately for this guy and that it is all in the interest of true love but time will tell. I was her friend for a long time so I have stuck with her through this too.

Like others have said follow your heart. Sometimes forgiving people is a large part of being a Christin so although it is morally wrong to do what she has done, It is done and we move on.

Not much else new with me, I am glad to have my test behind me.LOL.

Fists up!

debbie444

Mardy - whiny, sulky, stroppy, moany, summed up in one word! I guess its a Derbyshire / Yorkshire word. We have manny too, spiteful, mean etc.
Sam has all of his stitches and staples out and is doing well. I did some more Christmas shopping today. My nephew wanted weights - after i staggered across town carrying ALL of them in one box , i realised that this time last year i couldnt have done that!
Debbie

ake

hi ladies,

i just wanted to wish you all a happy thanksgiving. i'm leaving tomorrow for ny to spend the week with my relatives. so excited.

i've been having a hard time recently...just thinking all the time about cancer, feeling like it's going to be hard to keep it from coming back, worried all the time. i think it has to do with the holidays, remembering how i spent them last year, and feeling like no matter what, i feel sometimes that i can't get farther enough away from my initial diagnosis to feel safe. in january, it will be a year since i ended chemo and that freaks me out. just had a lot of fears recently.

so, i'll take a deep breath like i always do and try to enjoy my week. but, it's hard right now and it's frustrating to me that these things are in my mind a lot these days.

anyways, i love you all. hope you have a fantastic holiday. i'm grateful for every single one of you.

love,
amy

ravdeb

Amy...
Enjoy the weekend. I can relate to your feelings...really, really, really! Deep breaths are what we need to take. I wonder how I can get those feelings out of my head, too! This is why I go to the beach...very soothing and makes me really understand what life is all about..G-d's beautiful creations.

Debbie..thanks for the translation! Sam is an amazing dog. Really a Superdog!!! So glad he's healing so nicely after all of that.

And you carried weights around like that! I'm impressed. Can I have some of those muscles???

The prednisone I had to take prior to my CT gave me that fatigue I so remember from the dexamethasone. I have been noticing it in the mornings...my body is so heavy and tired and this morning reminded myself that it's best to just get up and get going..seems to help the fatigue..or I just stop thinking about it!

maryanne..glad to hear your test went okay. I should get one of those, too. I'm sure your arm will be fine but I would have been scared to do that. I told the doctor she would just HAVE to get that IV in as the other arm was off limits. She understood. I do have a big bruise where the IV was because she had to wiggle it a lot to make sure it was in. I'm used to that. Tired of it..but used to it...

I agree with you, maryanne, about your friend and her affair and affairs in general. I totally believe that marriages need to be worked on and if there is a problem and one is not getting what one wants out of it, then there should be counseling, or discussion or whatever it is t get it to work. Affairs are not the answer and the ones that I've seen in the past...those never work out in the end and then everybody is left lost and alone and the kids are a wreck. What is the point???

I'm old fashioned, though...
However..there were plenty of affairs in the Bible!
And... I sometimes think that marriages should be on 20 year contracts and then you either resign or move on!