2005 ROCK-TOBER CHEMO GIRLS

ravdeb

Hi again...
I left the boards to finish my coffee and read the news...

I was in utter shock. I had slept through the news last night and didn't pay attention to the news on the radio, I guess, when I was in the car (have to really listen because of the Hebrew).

A 57 year old grandmother, the first grandmother, blew herself up yesterday in Gaza next to one of the Israeli Defense Force posts. She had been politically active and her family, though they didn't know she had planned on doing this, supported her all the way after it was over.

She had like 9 grandchildren...

I will never understand the lack of respect for life on the part of these fanatics. I am fighting for my life and want to live to be at least 57 and she went and took her own..in a violent, ugly manner.

I'm sick about this and I guess it sickens me more because she was an adult. The younger ones are being brain washed and are impressionable. It is sad that this is happening..but a grandmother!

I will never understand it. I'm not talking politics. I won't get into that. I'm talking about saving a life...cherishing life.

sorry..just had to write this...
For those who are unfamiliar..Gaza is what the news terms the "territories" and is where the Jewish settlers left from recently... I don't live near there...

ravdeb

Oh Victoria..what a fantastic Thanksgiving! I agree..may it go on and on...

Wait...TWO kitchens? How nice! It's something I'd love to have...a meat kitchen and a dairy kitchen. A young Arab couple who got married a few years ago and are friends of ours..when they built their home before the wedding (the family built it for them and furnished it..it was amazing to have a home like that BEFORE the wedding!) they built two kitchens. One was for regular cooking of meals and the other one was off of the living room for when they had guests for coffee and dessert only. That is really neat...

I had a talk with my husband about this 57 year old grandmother suicide bomber. My confusion is this..this woman has gone through menopause and well..in my opinion the hormones would give her the connections she should have with her family. We all, as we age, become more attached to family and our priorities. But, my husband said that they are brain washed from a young age and Hamas and other terrorist organizations are like "wizards" and are able to pick out the kind of people they can brain wash. She was chosen...

Very sad... I hate it. Wish people would have their causes and then work at them constructively. Now, THAT would make a difference.

ravdeb

Debbie...
"Hey - know what i learnt today ? That in Turkey they call a turkey an Indian!"

Interesting that you say that...

In Hebrew... the words for turkey and India come from the same root...turkey is Hodu and India/n is Hodi and I consistently get these two words mixed up meaning that we eat a lot of Indians for a meal!!!!

Wanted to say that I got the Grace and Gratitude cd that Olivia Newton John put out and it is absolutely beautiful! So, if you didn't get it and you still can..please do. My friend in the States sent it to me.

RoseMarie

Listening to my cd as I read the posts and drink coffee...
Thank you for all your sweet compliments on the table cloth. I actually "borrowed" the idea from my sister. She's so good about wanting to make great memories for her kids (all 9 of them!) she and I are only a year apart and are so close. We always shop together the day after Thanksgiving so I was really missing her at 5:30 this am.

Ravdeb - it's so frightening when people have no regard for their own life! I don't understand it either. I keep hoping and praying the craziness will STOP!
Victoria - sounds like you had a wonderful time with your family!
(Sorry to hear about everyone's dental problems!)
Well, happy Friday everyone. I did my bit for the economy this morning...not much though as I was home by 6:30...

debbie444

Rosemarie - you were back home by 6.30 in the morning??? What time did you go out??
I was looking at your cloth. Are they emroidered or transferred on or something? I would love to make one for this Christmas. Or is it a plastic one ?? What did your kids think to writing by the way?
After turkey at Thanksgiving ( which i thought was the 24th but obviously isnt, what do you eat at Christmas? Turkey again?
Victoria - Sam says munch burble gobble ahh. They arrived today. Not sure what they are but after a suspicious sniff he decided he loved them. We are breaking them into small peices as he tries to swallow them whole! How you got them through customs i am not sure, but thankyou! The kids havent seen the sweete yet as they are at school. Some i recognise, like the starburst and skittles ( but different flavours) but some i dont. The cinammon ones made me laugh. When i was a kid my aunt sent me some cinammon chewing gum, that is the one and only other timei have seen cinammon flavoured anything ( apart from candles of course!)
I was talking to my friend Ishmail about the suicide bombers etc ( he is muslim). He said it is down to a lack of proper education by their heirarchy, someone bad gets to them before they are taught the truth by a good teacher. They work out who can be affected and teach them the wrong way. It is so sad. ravdeb - do you ever feel unsafe? Catherine looked at you on the map and was concerned for you!!

Victoria

ravdeb

Debbie..Your friend Ishmail hit it right on the nose. That is exactly the problem. It's just horrible. There seems to be no way out. They even rewrite the history books for their grade schoolers so that they learn all the wrong stuff as far as their own history and ours. So difficult, when they are using brain washing techniques, to break the bad cycle. And with Hamas and other fanatic groups heading their governments..I just wonder how we can make changes... fanaticism breeds hatred.

I do feel safe..safer here than in the States or in Europe. I live in a safe place. I really do feel safe. When I was traveling alone in Barcelona..I was afraid. Kept my eyes wide open all the time.

must run..

karen1956

Rosemarie - beautiful table cloth!!! thanks for sharing the pic.
Ravdeb - I fell asleep before the news last night so did not hear about the latest suicide bomber. It is so frightful how a group of people could have so little value for life (actually no value). So opposite of how I was brought up. I would love two kitchens. I think I am lucky to have two ovens (I too keep kosher). Where are you at in Israel.
I need to go out and get the Oliva Newton John CD you are all talking about.
Today the stores opened up early - some at 5:00am. Not me, I dislike the crowds, so no shopping for me today. The deals may be good, but its not worth fighting the crowds. Not sure what i will do today other than stay away from the stores. Wishing everyone feel good days.

Graycie

Happy to hear everyone had a Nice Thanksgiving...I could taste the food this year, unlike last year. I had a nice Thanksgiving other than the fact my mother-in-law told me I look "old" without the wig and I look like squiggy from the old Shirley and Laverne show.....I know I look funny but How Rude! Guess who is wearing the wig forever now, ha.....

Rosemarie, cute tablecloth. What a nice keepsake. Something you will cherish forever.

Ravdeb, that is such a shame about that 57 yr old grandma. I am 57. She had so much to live for with all those grand babies. I can't even imagine how they can get that brainwashed. If she is anything like me she probably went through menopause a few years a go so that shouldn't be a factor. Menopause or no menopause it doesn't make anyone that crazy. At least I hope not. Or we would have a lot of psycho women walking around.

I have Olivia Newton John's first CD she did for BC, it is called "Stronger than Before" that is good too. It was distributed through Hallmark. Now I will have to look for her new one. Is that also a Hallmark CD? Right now I am listening to the TracySeattle CD. I like everyone's song choices.

Michele, Sorry to hear about your friend. I have to admit, lung cancer is even scarier than BC.

Debbie, It sounds like Sam is doing really well, yipee!

I am missing something about Kelly, Roses, new friend? I will have to go back and see what I missed.......

Hi to everyone else I missed.

Gail

ravdeb

Hey Karen..
I live towards the north near Zichron Yaakov. I'm in between Haifa and Tel Aviv.

Another kosher person!!! YES!

I see you are from Denver...Got a cousin there...

Be well..

ravdeb

Graycie..I'm so sorry your mother in law said that to you. I bet you look beautiful. No way you don't..really! I don't remember squiggy from the tv show (though I watched that but I can't remember) but that was mean to say that. It's hard enough to uncover the head and have short hair much shorter than we are used to. Just be strong and keep that wig off. It will help your hair grow better without the wig.

Keep massaging your head, too. I read Paula's comment about her hair. Paula..you are young and you have great hair naturally! My hair is not thick either anymore like it used to be. But massaging does stimulate growth. So try that.

But don't give up!!! And don't listen to comments like that.

I thought about you as I know you are the same age as that grandmother suicide bomber. It's horrific...

oh..and you asked about Kelly..she has a new "friend" and that friend sent her roses! Now isn't THAT romantic!

DeannaB

I just started chemo in Nov. My first experience was not good- I am hoping it was just nerves. I go Tuesday for my second treatment- and they said the hair should be gone by the weekend. I am more scared about that then the crazy chemo- I guess it's just a feminine thing. Anywways, I am only 29 years old and this is all just hard to believe.
DeannaB

Anonymous

Hi Girls!
On Wednesday, I got my first real haircut! It felt great to actually decide on a hair style! I treated myself at the Aveda Salon - their Rosemary Mint Shampoo is incredible! Here's me yesterday in our dining room just b/4 turkey time!

chumfry

Graycie, I will come kick your MIL in the butt. I'm a big, strapping farm girl, so when I kick somebody's butt, it stays kicked! <g> I can't even imagine any of my relatives saying something like that to me. Good grief!

I got the Rock-tober CD in the mail today, so I've been listening to it. I think Tracy did such a good job arranging the different styles. It's got a really nice flow. I may have to check out some of the artists that are new to me.

Someone asked us to explain why we chose the songs we did. "Shaking the Tree" makes me feel strong and joyful, like I can do anything I put my mind to.

Anonymous

Will read and catch up tomorrow morning, just a quick update on the my new friend ... his name is David (now this makes 3 of them for our little world). When he asked what I wanted to do, I told what I really needed to do was get out my Christmas stuff and my tree. So that's what we did. And we decorated the tree and then watched a movie. He also put all the boxes back and shook my hand when he left. (My daughter was with us and I certainly don't want to get her thinking anything yet).

Anyway, he called maybe 2 minutes later and said he had a great time, that Teryn is absolutely wonderful and when could we go out again. So, it's Sunday. Teryn will be with a babysitter, we will do 'dinner and a movie.'

Turns out this guy was married for 22 years and his wife decided that she wanted to date. He has his teenage boys and she has their 8 y.o. daughter. He says its as civilized as divorces go. He was raised in foster homes! Pretty shocking. He is a business owner/contractor. Successful, Christian ... Really had pulled himself up by the bootstraps. Definitely a nice guy.

Happy happy happy ....... but yes, Mary Anne, slow is the word ... my heart isn't ready to be taken in so easily.

debbie444

Oh yes - it is a delightful Dave! I am really, unproportionally happy for you Kelly.
The mind wanders tho - you have your Christman tree up ALREADY???

ravdeb

Yahooooooooooooooo Kelly!!! He sounds like a keeper. Another David on the boards. Definitely must be a good one!

Debbie..they put their Christmas trees up after their Thanksgiving..trust me..I know!!!

Laura..you look stunning, gorgeous, mature, wise, sexy..what a great haircut!!! WOW!

Hey..got my hair trimmed, too. Curls are almost gone..kinda like a permanent almmost gone. Sad. I liked my curls. But, it's wavy in parts and quite short since I keep trimming it and enjoy the short hair now. I had wavy hair before so I suspect I'm getting it back. Just a few curls in the front that he hasn't cut yet (it grows slowly on the top...) and the back at the bottom is a bit curly but it was before chemo, too...so...I guess that's my own hair! Only white. And yes..I'm keeping my white hair. I like it..the new me. I'm not who i was before anyway. Might as well show it on the outside, too!

I sure am looking forward to getting that cd! I continue to listen to my new Olivia cd. Love it so much!

ravdeb

DeannaB...

First of all...we all know how hard it is to get through the chemo..it's not a picnic but you can do it!!! We know that..we are all women on this thread who did it.

Losing hair is hard..no question about that. But once it's gone, that fear of losing it will be over. Trust me!

We are all now, on this thread at different stages of re-hair growth and well...it's a great feeling.

I suggest that you try to join the group that is just starting chemo in Nov. of 06. You will get a lot of support there as you will trek the journey along with them.

Also..there is a young survivors thread that you may be interested in where other young women with bc talk and discuss and support each other.

Or join us and we can try to help you.

Good luck.
You can do this!!! We are proof of that!

Graycie

Laura, Your hair looks nice...No one would ever know what you went through this past year...

Kelly, I am so happy for you. ...I hope Dave turns out to be a keeper like Tracy's Dave. Maybe it's all in the name...... He really sounds like a nice guy.

Ravdeb & Cindy, Thanks..My daughter couldn't believe her ears and thinks they are so mean (sister-in-law included)....I am surprised I took it as well as I did and didn't start crying since I am so sensitive but I have to realize she is old and probably doesn't think before she speaks. She wasn't like this years ago.......They did say they love my wig.......I guess that's a hint......


I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend. It is beautiful here, sun is out and no snow in site.......

Gail

Curlylocks

Good Morning,

Its a beautiful Saturday morning here and unusually warmier for this time of year. It is 10 degrees celcius late Nov!

I didnt get to go and see my coworker yesterday as he is not up to having company. It makes me realize that I will have to remember him the way he was as the end of his life is not too far away. It makes me also appreciate how lucky I was to have caught my cancer when I did just by fluke last year...I shudder to think if it had gone unnoticed.

I got up late today 9:45 a.m., missed my puppies final training class (actually it was graduation class) but I just didnt have the energy to pull my body out of bed earlier this morning. I have been taking Zoladex shots and I think it is the culprit along with the Armidex for making me exhausted. My nightsweats and hotflashes have been waking me at least 4 times a night if not more. For those suffering with the hotflashes did you know that they make hotflashes pjs and nightgowns. They are made of the same material that running clothing is made of and suppose to be wonderful! Here is the link of a site I found, will probably order something this weekend.

http://www.serenecomfort.com/category.as...CFSAeWAodIHiBoQ

I went to see "Deck the Halls" Christmas movie yesterday by myself as hubby was working and so was everyone else. It was cute and put me in the Christmas spirit. I also got a free movie pass as they totally mixed up which theatres had which movies. Since it is so nice I will put up some lights outside today.

Rosemarie - okay you were up at 5:30 a.m. to go shopping!!! I struggle to get up at 6:00 a.m. to go to work..... Hopefully you got a few bargains for your effort. I love your tablecloth. Do you do the same thing for Christmas?

Ravdeb - I'm glad you are safe. It is sad that the very young are brainwashed to carry out such horrendous acts against other human beings when us ladies are struggling and fighting for our lives everyday. Was your hair curly prior to chemo as you said the curls are now almost gone? My hair was curly before and is even more curlier now.

Gracyie - I;m sorry for the ignorant comment that you mother in law made. Sometimes people just dont think before they open their mouths.

Laura - love your new haircut. The candles on the table are gorgeous, remind me of pumpkins. You look so at peace.

Kelly - your new man sounds like a keeper. His exwife's loss is your gain! How fun going out and getting a tree. Did you get a real tree? We usually wait until around the middle of December as I am terrified that the tree will dry out and start a fire. My hubby is a part time firefighter in town so very aware of the hazards.


Have a great day ladies.

Michele Wenz

Anonymous

Whew! Lots of reading to catch up on!!

Ravdeb and Tadah: You guys need to get your teeth fixed. Ask your dentist about how letting your mouth go can effect your whole body's health. My friend didn't realize this and after finally getting a good dentist ..... hmm her "allergy" to perfume went away. Apparently the 'hole' in her mouth was quite deep. One can even get heart problems from not fixing your teeth or if you develop an infection in your gums, it can be quite dangerous.

TracySeattle, I love the new CD!! I have never heard this Celine Dion song and I love it. Thank you so much for your hard work for us and you packaged it up so nice!!

Laura, I love your new haircut. You are just so cute!!! Do people tell you that all the time??

Debbie, Ravdeb is right, we put our trees up right away. Plus I took 2 vacation days so I had time off from Thursday all the way thru Monday, so I want to make the most of it!! Isn't it strange that his name is Dave, too? You called it!

Michelle, I understand the fire fear. It's fake. It has the lights already on it, too. It's just heavy which is why I need help getting it out and into the living room. My friend, David, loved our ornaments and hanging them on our tree. I think I will have to get him so ornaments since he said he probably won't get a tree since he and the boys don't have any decorations.

TracyNY, did you eat enough to satisy yourself? Lucky dog getting lipo again!!

Gail, OMG, I would have said something, I am not into biting my tongue anymore.

***Shaking the Tree has now come on the player ....... "we are shaking the tree" ...... I like this, never heard it *******

Anonymous

Rosemarie, forgot to ask about that tablecloth. What did you use to trace the kids hands? What did you use to write their thankful thoughts? Hope you don't mind but I might try this for Christmas for my brother and do it with his kids.

ravdeb

Kelly..I may be scared of the dentist but I do go. Was there just before chemo and was planning to go in Sept...slipped cuz of so many other appointments. Kept putting it off. But you are right. That's why my dentist knows me so well...he knows that we have a love/hate relationship!!!!

Michele..no..never had curls 'cept when I was a baby. I got really tight curls after my hair grew back in but it's just not like that anymore. I think one or two more haircuts and it will be gone. My hair was always wavy and could look very straight after I would blow it dry. But without blowing it dry, it was wavy. I'd have few little ringlets on the bottom and I have those..not sure what that is. Now I have like half curls instead of whole curls. I think that could be my natural wave. My hair is just so different because I dyed it black since I was 30. I was pre-mature gray...really a lot of gray for a 30 year old. Turned gray when I was about 20 but by the time I was 30...I was almost totally gray. It wasn't nice. That's why I dyed it. Now it's totally white! It's a much nicer color than it was 20 years ago.

Graycie..My mother in law continually tells me that our prime minister's wife has the same color hair as I do. Like I should be impressed or something..the prime minister's wife is about 15 years older than I am!!! She means well...

marymelodi

Hello everyone,
So nice to hear all your stories and events and family news. Congratulations Kelly on your new male friend. I was thinking how funny it is that even as adults and middle-agers, at that, we still refer to "boyfriends" and "girlfriends." It's a leftover expression from when we were kids. I know, it's customary. I was just thinking there should be a word for an adult friend of either gender who is special. What that word would be I have no idea. It's just a funny thing about the English language.

We had such nice Thanksgiving day. Took the time to cook well and carefully with all the nice touches we enjoy. Even lit up a nice new candle with pine fragrance. I love richly scented candles.

Today is bright and sunny and I am on my way out to work on organizing our garage space. It's too small for our vans (must be close to 100 years old) so we use it for storage. We live in a house that was built in the 1800's approx. 2 blocks from the Erie Canal. We still have a rock foundation and old, old features in the house.

This week we have to get our living room and dining room packed up and then move the furniture into the storage for a week. Beginning on Dec 5th, our landlady is having our hardwood floors stripped and refinished and then painters are coming in to repaint these rooms and up the stairs to the 2nd floor landing. We have 5 big bookcases that are stuffed full, many videos, records, CDs, electronics, and then all the furniture. I'm worried about the oak table and upholstered furniture being in the garage space but we will wrap everything carefully in tarps. I'm trying to consider this to be an opportunity to have a fresh house (at least in 2 rooms and the stairs) for holiday decorating. I really need to purge alot of junk out of our house. I think I will not unpack all the books until after Christmas and for the holidays I will put out all my snowman decorations on the shelves.

So, I'm rolling up my sleeves and going out to work for a while in the sunshine. I'll check back later.
Mary

debbie444

I really cant believe you are decorating for Christmas already. It would severely wind me up. I hate it when things start dropping off of the tree, when the branches sag and when do you eat the tree chocolates - surely they dont sit there for over a month?? Ours struggle to still be there for Christmas and we only put the tree up about a week before!! When do you put the lights up outside etc??
Mary - i have got you a new snowman decoration - will post it to you.
Graycie - i am so cross - send here her.Why do people think that as they get older they dont have to think of other peoples feelings or be tactful Grrr.

Graycie

Since everybody is showing their Thanksgiving table here is our's. No cute handprint's though. I took this before dinner because I couldn't believe how long the table was but it doesn't look very long in the picture.

Anonymous

Gail, I love your red wall. I so miss my red wall I had in my old townhouse. I painted it and painted it (sponged) and it was so beautiful and warm. Now, I just don't have a wall that truly belongs only to the dining room (dining and living room flow into each other). I had my menu collection matted and framed so I have menus hanging all over the wall in my dining room.

Laura, your dining room is very inviting, too.

Red is great for dining rooms/restaurants because the color makes one hungry.

Anonymous

Hi girls -

Graycie -
Your table is fit for a queen...Queen Graycie that is! Just lovely! And I love the colors of your walls. I feel so bad about the "comment" re: your hair. Don't run and hide under that wig because of someone else's comment. I'm trying to blame it on her old age. I had an elderly aunt who always belittled me. It took me years to finally not feel bad about her rude remarks. You look fabulous and you are a caring and considerate gal! Hope you are enjoying this weekend and making the most of each day, you so deserve it, sister!

Kelly -
I am so happy for you! Baby steps, yes, but I am wishing you the very best with your Dave. You deserve a knight in shining armor! Love is in the air! Thanks for the compliment. No... rarely is anyone as full of compliments for me as you and the girls here (besides my dh and my mother of course! LOL). But I get a lot of dirty looks! LOL jk (just kidding)

Rosemarie -
Love the tablecoloth! Very creative! It seems as though everyone in our group is creatively inclined! You are creating incredible memories that will cherished for ever! Rock on Mom!

Michelle -
Thank you for the compliment. I will keep your friend in my prayers. I hear you sister with the hot flashes! How annoying and just plain frustrating. I'm superstitious...if I buy the pajamas, etc. to deal with the flashes, I'm worried they'll never go away! I am going to wait a couple more months...if they haven't subsided...I am checking out the website you posted.

TaDah -
You must be getting excited about the upcoming procedure! Yay you! You are going to look even MORE FAB!

debbie -
Wow - your thoughtfulness is so truly appreciated. How do you do it all? Your energy is admirable.

Victoria -
Where are you?

marymelodi -
OMG - you have a lot of work ahead of you! I just had to undertake a similar domestic task...it's amazing how much "stuff" us girls accumulate. Good luck...and yes, it's a good time to start the 3 piles....keep, throwaway, and donate!

ravdeb -
Okay, let me get this straight...it's now Devorah, rabbi wannabe, prime minister's wife, ravdeb, the goofy lady in Israel who wears a thong on her head.... LOL

EVERYONE -
Hi there! Hope everyone is happy, happy! Be well.

Laura

marymelodi

Graycie:
YOu have the dining room I've always dreamed of . . . how did you get it out of my head and into your house? I love it and think that you must be our "Princess Grace." Yes, indeed,that is your new identity. . . no matter what a rude relative may say . . . to us your are royalty . . .princess or queen, whatever you prefer!!

Mary

Anonymous

I love you all so much! Sweet dreams...

Laura

maryannecb

Rock-tober Girls

A year ago our stories began.
Confusion reigned. We hit the wall.
Breast cancer struck a hefty blow.
The grief was terrible.


As leaves fell outside,
We searched,we grappled.
Why? How? No
Our thread was formed..

We watched in fear as
Chemicals entered our bodies.
We silently willed them to find the place
Where cancer lurked..

The weeks went by.
Our hair, our hair....
Just like that, we looked sicker.
Hats, wigs and scarves became our crowns.

Winter came.
We tossed and turned.
We bolstered each other,
Stayed the course.


Light began to shine.
The chemo ended.
Rads seemed so simple.
Lay back, hit me hard!

And then...
Life continued.
We brought each other our fears,
To worry together.

Good things happened.
Bad things happened.
Friendships deepened.
We became, the Rock-tober Girls.

Now our thread has become a blanket.
Our stories snugly woven.
As we journey through
The unknown ...

Fists up, Mary-Anne