anyone starting chemo in Nov 2005

Deb - Mets???  What is going on?

Long story short (I just don't wanna type it-I get freaked) is that I am having all this pain (old news), and I suddenly "broke out" in this horrific pain in my shoulder area, by my collarbone.  It hurts like something awful.  

I am terrified to say the least.  I can press on two areas there and it hurts all the more. 

Help. 

Oh, Deb, I am praying for you. I hope you get good answers sooooooon.

Mary Lou, thinking of you, too.

I hop on the plane tomorrow, wish me luck. Things are pretty wired here today and I haven't even packed. Yikes!

Love to all, Anna 

Sending love to you all. I had my surgery on the 14th, was in from 9:30 till about 4:00. My arm is so sore from being tied up for so long.

Everything went fine. I was up walking the hall just after supper. I was on my way home the next day by 3:00. He said he was keeping me till Saturday.

But he said I was a phenomenal patient, and let me go!!!!!

I was so happy....

Hayden was born at 8:06 Monday Morning. I had a very hard time with it. Jessie had her dads wife go back with her. It was so hard to watch her come get my son and take him back to meet his daughter.

Jesse's mom couldn't come this time cause she has just moved to Carolina. I got very hurt, and just stayed a few seconds after she was born.

Sebastian didn't get to spend time with my mom, cause they took him to stay with Jessie's aunt. He could have stayed with us till Wed morning.

The kids called Michael to see how I was, but never called me. Still haven't.

Also got nothing for Mothers day. There won't be any drama this time, I will let the chips fall where they may.

I do feel a long conversation coming with Cory. Could be the last.

ML-thinking of you. 

I love you guys.  Please pray for me to get through till onc. appointment, and that I accept God's will for my life. 

 Sounds like alot going on with everyone!   You've all been in my thoughts and prayers!!!   Thru the ups and downs of this wild ride!  (I do stop in and read up on posts when my computer cooperates.)

I don't have any energy these days.  I've only been working 2 - 3 days and week and even that is way too much for me.    I ache so bad!!   My oncologist told me to stop taking the Arimidex and then see her in a couple of weeks.   I also have to make an appt. to see my rhuematologist (his office is over 3 hours away).   He's told me that its difficult to prescribe any meds for my ankylosing spondylitis cuz of my history of cancer.  YIKES!!  I am so discouraged!!   Damn, damn, damn cancer.  Damn arthritis.  I feel like crap.

Plus, my 32 year old son had a grand mal seizure a couple of weeks ago.   His second one in 8 years.   He can't drive until further notice,  so I've been trying to help out.   Lots of doctor appts. and tests to get to.

Sorry that I haven't been here in forever and then when I do show up I'm so "down in the dumps".   

Thanks for being here!!!!!!

LAT56

Lat!!!! We are always so glad to see you here. Here is a place to vent always and to always be understood.

I love all my sisters so much for being here for me.

I haven't said anything about some of my joint pain, but it is in my legs and elbows and in the joints at my shoulders. Almost to the point of not being able to walk. Now that I have been off my legs for some time, I know it is not weight related. My legs hurt to my upper thigh.

I really think it is fibromyalgia. All the signs are there. I stopped taking my femara. I just wanted to see how I felt. No difference much at all. I will see the onc as soon as I get through this surgery. Which went so well.... I was up walking that  night ( Didn't even get woke up till 4pm) and home by 3pm the next day!

Sorry to ramble....

Neurontin is supposed to help, but if it does I can't tell ....

 Grrrrr pain is such a bitch....

I still have 3 tubes in my body, Marg, this was only done on the left side  LOL  The other good girl was reduced when the expander was put in. She is all better. And 2 and a half pounds smaller.

I sure hope all this heals, and there are no more surgeries for me ....

Odlays- Yes I guess Hayden was my blessing, but I really don't see myself bonding to much with her at this point. I am just going to go on with my life and try not to let it stress the hell out of me.

Deb- My prayers are with you......I pray that God will hold you in his healing hands.....it could be fibromyalgia . Say something to your Dr. And look it up, I have so many signs.

Anna, Did you come home , or is it next week? I have lost track of time. Best of luck with your new little one.

Here is our new little one.

I was holding her, that is my mom in the chair. Anna , if you see her out at the quilt shows...say hi.

Love to you all.....

Hello sisters,

Can you guys peek at my thread about my recurrence fears?  I hate to type it all out again-it's so stinking late, and we had such a long day (but we ended it with church, which was a much-needed thing). 

Long story made short is my onc. is very confident that I am ok.  She made "the face" when I told her my liver area/ribs seem tender, but said that she will determine if I need a bone scan after my tumor markers. 

She thinks the pain is MS related, or MS meds related.  That kind of sucks. 

So, I play the waiting game till I get results.  I'm not dancing for joy, but I feel better.  I just wish the darned tailbone pain and liver area pain would subside so I can calm down. 

LAT56, soooo good to have seen you here.  I "hear" ya about feeling like crap!  How is your son? 

Anna-I miss your loving words.  So, are you back yet?  Do you have a new little one to love? 

Margerie and Odalys-I love you guys.  Thank you both for the concern and being such a great sounding board.  

ML-the baby is beautiful.  I'm praying for you, and the struggles.  I'm sure it's tough. 

Love you all....Deb

Yes, a wonderful holiday weekend to everyone!



Great to hear from you, Lat. It sounds like joint pain and aches are everyone's story. It sure is hard. Esp. now that we are always on the lookout....



Mary Lou, I am happy you jumped right through that last surgery hoop. It seems you are making your peace with the family situation. Families can be very very trying. Everyone propably thinks their family's issues are worse than anyone else's, but I think we all have issues.



Debbie, I hope you get good news, or rather news that helps you move forward. Not knowing what's going on is so hard.



Odalys, how is the situation at work? And Margerie, I can just imagine your busy schedule with the school year winding to a close. I taught for 18 years and I sure do remember those May/June days.



I got back last weekend and have been making the rounds of drs appointments. My orthoped. surgeon said the pain in my thigh is from the bone growing around the shaft of the hip prosthesis and that it will go away. I asked him point blank if that leg might be longer than the other, but he said no.



My gyn kept me waiting two hours and fifteen minutes in the waiting room, and then another hour and ten minutes on the table. With the little gown that doesn't close. And the paper lap cover. Hubs said why didn't you complain? It's hard to complain to the person who is about to examine you while your legs are spread and your feet are up in stirrups. I didn't complain and she didn't apologize. What I did do is miss my spiritual support group meeting that meets once a month and that I had been so looking forward to! I miss those dear people and one of the group members died last month and it was really important for me to check in with them.



I saw my GP yesterday bec I have had a persistent cough (tickle type) since January and as I was leaving he said hey, why are you leaning slightly to the left? I said what do you mean, I'm standing straight. He said take off your right shoe and when I did he said see, your right leg is a little longer than the left. So then I walked for him shoe on/shoe off and we decided that I did much better with the shoe off, so he told me to get a little insert for the left shoe, which I did and I'm going to try this and see if the pain gets better or maybe even goes away. I do feel more even. Strange, huh? Maybe the orth thought I'd be mad at him? Maybe he REALLY didn't see?



Heading up to Boston tomorrow. My daughter is so excited. I am too. Hubs is so depressed and lonely back in France. It's really hard not feel guilty, but I can't. I brought my daughter up alone till she was 13 and it feels like I haven't had time just for her since then. I so love being with her and this time is sacred. I can't let guilt spoil it. I left little dog with hubs to keep him company. I have even cherished my week alone here. It seems I like being alone (knowing I will be back with him at some point) but he doesn't.



I'll be checking in from up north. They have high speed, so I'll be able to bop around.



Love to all my sisters,



Anna

Hi Sisters, I am missing you all.

Anna, yes Va has become hot and humid again. But the trees and my flowers are doing great, so I'm happy.

I have recovered very well, still have swelling. I know that this part takes time, so I'm just watching the progress. Not like it's my first rodeo. So I have no fear now, seems like it's just that part of life that stinks....but you have to keep moving forward.

DEB- WHERE ARE YOU??????? How are things going?

How is everyone else? As you can see, it is 1:42 am. I can't sleep to well anymore. Just seem restless, or uneasy. Not sure, but I think it is family stress....in fact I know it is.

Later I will fill you all in on the DRAMA in my life. After the drama is over.

I have a grandson! 6 lbs. 12 oz. Only 10 hrs labor and I am so in awe of my beautiful daughter! We almost didn't make it to the hospital. She kept thinking she was in "early labor" and that it would have to get "worse" before we should call the doula. Luckily, I insisted and the doula made us leave the house at midnight. She was fully dilated by the time we got to the hospital and pushed for only one hour. All I can say is it was the birth I could only have dreamed about for her. I am so thankful....

Yeah... Anna is a grandma!!!! Glad to hear your daughter had an easy delivery and mommy and baby are doing well.  Please give her a hug from me for a job well done.  And, give the baby a welcome to this world kiss from me.  Let your daughter know, the baby has cyber aunty!!!  Does he have a name yet?  What a beautiul gift from God.  I can't wait to see some pics of the baby. 

His name is Felix.

Thank you for all your blessings. Pray my daughter gets through the initial difficulties with breastfeeding. She is very large-breasted and had a very discouraging time yesterday. The nurse on duty was one of those women where you ask yourself why on earth she ever went into nursing in the first place. I think she actually sabotaged the breastfeeding relationship and here my daughter is one to worry about everything. That's why the easy delivery was so wonderful for her; she had thought she wouldn't be able to manage a natural childbirth but so wanted one. I'm looking into contacting the La Leche League. I remember how they helped me way back when I ran into issues and the pediatrician didn't encourage me to continue.

Love to all,

Anna 

Oh Anna!! 

What a wonderful story!  Felix is the sweetest name, too!  

Breastfeeding was rough for Daniel and I, too. Mostly because he was in the NICU, and I didn't get to try all the time.  I only got to do it a total of 3 times, and I cherish each of those memories.  He still got almost 4 months of breastmilk from me, and I still get mad at myself for not having pumped more.  My cancer breast was a FOUNTAIN, and could have given plenty, but we ran out of room to store all of it!  We bought an extra freezer for all the milk I was pumping! 

Anyway, I will be praying for ease of mind when it comes to breastfeeding for your lovely daughter. 

I'm overjoyed at your joy! 

Love and prayers, Deb