please help

Hi Sue and Karyll,

I just wanted to send you both some healing vibes and hugs. You are sure doing it tough right now and my heart goes out to each of you. It is such a stinking, rotten disease.

Much love to you and everyone who is in a similar place,

gb 

Sueps, don't let doubt slip back in. If you have the surgery you will be here longer than 10 years for your boys. My mom had a single mast and went through the chemo and rads 6 years ago and she is going strong, no evidence of disease. She has a friend who had breast cancer at least 30 years ago and she is doing well because she went through treatment. Don't let your fears keep you from getting the treatment you need to survive!

Sheila

Darling Suepps, you can do this and you MUST.  If you want to be around to annoy your children when you are old, you have to just do this, one step at a time.

None of us wanted this.  We were EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US just like you and truly would have loved to just ignore cancer and pretend it did not happen.  But you cannot ignore this.  You must go for your surgery and do what they tell you, and you will HAVE YOUR LIFE BACK!

There are thousands of us out here who have been on this journey, and are JUST FINE.  I am 9 years post treatment and doing fine, you will too. 90% of us get this treatment and recover fully.  You have a very good prognosis.  You will be fine.  Just don't give up now.

Don't give up now, it truly is easier once the surgery is over and that dang cancer is out of your body.

Stay strong, you are loved, and you are in are hearts and prayers.

Gentle hugs, Shirlann 

Sueps,

I completely understand your anxiety about all of this. Before my bilateral mastectomy which was July 10, I was nervous too, but would have been terrified had I not done it, and I couldn't live like that. I have 2 kids ages 8 andf 10, and it's because of them that I've been so aggressive with my treatment. My mom had bc but died of lung cancer. I'm stage 1, no nodes, er/pr+, her2-. I could've gone the lumpectomy/radiation route, but I chose to get rid of both. I've also chosen to do chemo even though they weren't sure how much benefit I'd get from it. I did it mainly because my tumor was grade 3.  The surgery and chemo have been completely doable. Both things have come such a long way in the last 10 years. My last chemo will be the end of Oct. Then I'll finish reconstruction. Have I had days of fear, dread, self-pity etc...?  Of course, but I honestly have tried to not let this control my life. I want to control it, and I've done everything I can to make that happen. One of my friends told me yesterday that she forgets I'm going through this because of the way I'm dealing with it and how my attitude is. I told her I don't want bc to define me; it's something that happened, and I have to deal with it. I also want my kids to learn that problems happen in life, and you must find ways to solve them and cope with them. I wish you all the luck with this. It's hard, but it's a battle that must be fought.

Eve

Sueps, honey, you will be just fine.  Remember, when the wind blows the curtain in your room, it is all of us, watching over you, standing in the shadows of the OR, in the waiting rooms, we are all with you.  This is a huge sisterhood of lovely women who have everyone of us been scared half silly.  Just as you are.  You are perfectly normal.  You will be a different person when the surgery, especially, is over.  It is not that bad, you go in, go sound asleep, and wake up and its over.  You feel like a truck ran over you, but from that instant on YOU ARE GETTING WELL!!!

Trust us, sweetie, we are all with you.

Hugs, Shirlann 

It's surreal Sue and it is not so long ago I was there waiting for surgery, and the next stage of the game. 5 weeks yesterday I had the right mastectomy and I start chemotherapy tomorrow. I will admit I had to force my one foot in front of the other to get there some days but I did because I have to give this treatment a chance to work, to live, to experience my children for a bit longer too. I thought all the things you are, I felt and sometimes still feel .. "to hell with this, I am not going to do this" But from somewhere, something makes me go to that next step to realize that one step at a time I CAN do this. I look at all these women here with admiration for what they have been through, and are still here to tell the tale.

I don't want it either.. believe me... My friend said to me... Karyll, you have been dealt a hand that you are forced to play... so lets play cards hon.  So hold on tight and we'll go on a helluva ride. I am only a couple of steps ahead of you here, so keep putting one foot in front of the other and you will be here too - on the other side of surgery-

PS - My lump sitting there, hurt worse than the surgery to remove it.

Plus there was a comforting relief in knowing that "thing" was out of me.

Take my hand, and the hands of all the wonderful ladies here offering you theirs... You CAN do it.

Karyll

Sue, I've been following you on your journey, but until now haven't posted.  The other ladies (Tender in particular) have been taking such wonderful loving care of you.  I just have to post now though.  Please, please, please don't give up on yourself Sue!  I know it's scary and I understand the temptation to just ignore it and hope that things will go back to the way they were before.  You can't run away from it or pretend it doesn't exist, Sue.  You must FIGHT it!!  Make this cancer sorry that it ever darkened your doorstep!!!  Do it for yourself and do it for your boys.  I refuse to even consider that my kids will grow up without me.  I'm going to enjoy my grandchildren one day.  There is no other option!

Hang in there Sue.  You are stronger than you think and you WILL beat this thing.

Sending big hugs and prayers your way,

Karen

Sue, I don't want to sound like a drug pusher, but in my case, antidepressants have been SO very helpful.  I was in a hopeless state of panic when I first found my lump.  I asked for medication before I was ever diagnosed, and I'm so thankful that I did.  I can remember exactly the moment it "kicked in".  I was so grateful for the feeling of calm that came over me.  I was able to think rationally and calmly.  I'm certain that it would help you as well. 

As for the Zeolite, don't feel badly about believing the advertisements.  I almost bought into it too.  I was thiiiiiiiiis close to ordering some.  I knew that it was too good to be true.

Stay strong and keep posting.  We're here for you! 

Hugs,

Karen

Hi dear Sueps, I take anti-depressants and they were a true life-saver with the breast cancer diagnosis.  Portia is spot on, they are great.  They do, however, take a few weeks to reach real relief, so don't give up on them if you start and be sure and be patient.

I also take Diazepam for "break through" anxiety attacks.  When under siege, as you are, I take 5mg, 4 times a day, I don't wait for an attack, I take them regardless, until the stressful situation is over.  But I am a big gal, so that is okay for me.  I am a life-long anxiety/depressive.  Like Portia, I don't like to sound like a drug pusher, but a little chemical help to get you past the surgery might be a big help.   You need to do this, any way you can get through it. 

Please don't worry about mets.  First of all, it is highly unlikely you will get them, and even if you do, they are very, very treatable today.  Women live for many years just knocking them down when they pop up.

So screw up your courage, dear girl, and do what you need to do to stay with your boys.  It is hard, but you can do it.

Hugs, Shirlann 

Sue,



Letting you know you're in my thoughts today and tomorow and seconding Shirlann's latest remark.



Tender