Starting Chemo in December 2013

MICHELLE! Hiiiiii! Xoxo. was so worried about you. So many {{{huggs!}}}} we all wish we could take all your trouble away. So unfair. Makes us realize how fragile this disease is. Let's hope things gradually get better..because they can't get much worse. Oh yea, remember, there's no more Cancer! There's cancer sh*t and other sh*t and you've got lots of other sh*t. You're a fighter girl, have to keep on fighting. But cry, rant and rave whenever you want. Will be praying for the best for you and hopefully mayo clinic can help

Barbara, I hope your doing well. I've been thinking about you.

Michelle, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's all I have to say about that!!

Lisa, it doesn't matter what you decide, what matters is that your happy. If trying to work things out makes you happy, then that's what you should do. We have all learned that we need to go for what we want because life is to short. People think that they know that, but they really don't. You don't really understand the enormity of that until you've gone through this.

JB, YAY on the promotion!

Kim, I've been really bad about food this month as well. My workouts have been suffering too. My hip is still bothering me. An old hip flexor issue has reared its ugly head. I used to have muscle thighs and butt, but with my chemo slow down I've lost them and apparently they used to support my old injury. Now they don't, so I work out to get them back and I hurt the old injury. So the physical therapist says I need to build them back up to support the old injury, but I work out and I hurt the hip...... and over and over again. A herceptin side effect is achey muscles and joints. Fingers crossed that herceptin is adding to the injury and once it's out of my system it won't bother me as bad and I can get the muscles built back up.

Speaking of Herceptin, TOMORROW IS MY LAST ONE. I'm right there with you Robin. ALMOST DONE!!!! WOOHOOOO! I'm jumping out of my skin with excitement. When I got the phone call today "this is the infusion center, reminding you of your appointment...." I screamed "F#####CCCCCKKKKK YOU!!! I will never have to hear you AGAIN!!!!! I'll NEVER sit in that bleepity bleep chair again!!!!!!!!!" Then Saturday is my "F#CK Cancer....no pink allowed party." There will be about 60 people coming. I have a skin tight, floor length, red dress and I plan to dance on the tables. Rock hard chest guy (yes I'm still seeing him, it's going so good) will have the responsibility to pick me up off the floor and get me home at the end of the night. I can't wait!!! Although, tomorrow I didn't ask anybody to come with me. I want to come home after I'm done and open a $100 bottle of champagne a friend got me and dance with my dogs, who have been licking my face throughout my battle, I want to have a really good cry and then a bubble bath, and then eat a pint of Hagendaaz and then another good cry, some more champagne an I want to just be alone to process it all. But I won't cry to much because I'm having my makeup done Saturday and don't want puffy eyes :-)

PS. The make-up artist will be putting fake eyelashes on me. Friggen eyelashes are thinning again for the fourth time..grrrrr

Lisa- I know all about that stinkin' pneumonitis. Did they give you anything for the cough?

Kimie- congrats on the mammo. What nursing degree are you going for? I've been an LVN (LPN) since 1999. I'm 3 classes away (taking 2 this semester) from a BS in applied Sociology with a focus on health and adulthood/aging. Hoping to take that, once my kiddos are a little older and do an accelerated BSN program.

Jodi- how is little LuLu?

Barbara- thinking about you. How are you doing?

Jbokland and Lisa- love how y'all are out there representing us all!!

Holli

Jeanette, that was awesome. I got tears in my eyes seeing you and hearing you speak. You look amazing too. I hope sassy head is doing well. You should be so proud of what you've done, we are so proud of you too!

Holli, no didn't get anything for the cough. It wasn't bad enough I guess which is fine. Actually I think it's getting a little better, slowly. He said that area on L lung should slowly disappear. You had it much worse than I. How are you doing with it? Are you off the steroids? Breathing better I hop

Re shot and AI - This works better for post menopausal, not pre.

Kim

I've started many a post, then closed the window again because I was just overwhelmed. I don't want to miss anyone, but I'm so behind . . .

Life has been super busy. Robin & DJJ, I really notice a big difference since finishing H. I have more energy, fewer aches, feeling stronger in every way. I hope you feel the same!

We had a big F U cancer party this past Saturday. DJJ, had to laugh at your dress description, mine was hot pink & skin tight& I also had my makeup done. So. Much. Fun. We were out till 1:30am, and everyone danced. My brother came down from NY & DJ'd, awesome music. The bartender was joking that when the party started & he saw we were a bunch if 40somethings with kids, he was like, no way will this crowd make it to closing. Was he wrong! They had to kick us out at 1:30- we would have kept going! Mega hangover the next day, but it was so worth it.

Missy, when this is finally behind you, you need to have the party to end all parties! Just sucks what you are going through!

Sorry to everyone who I've missed in this post. Just so crazy busy these days, hard to find a spare minute to post. I do read & think about you girls all the time!

Kim- my cancer was hormone positive so having another baby is out of the question anyway (plus I'm 38 now). If I get ovaries removed then I don't have to get the shot. If I take the rest out then that is less places the cancer can come back - in my opinion anyway. My oncologist says in my case it's probably a good idea. My youngest is 2 (almost 3). I want to be able to say I did everything I possibly could to keep cancer at bay. I want to hold my grand babies one day :0)

Holli

Holli - It seems like your MO is a step ahead of mine, this is a good thing. Thank you so much for the info. I will probably be calling my OBGYN within a few months of having to take the shots.... what a pain. I was having a lot of bleeding issues before I was diagnosed and probably would have had a hysterectomy by now, but chemo made my periods stop. I hope you are getting stronger and feeling better everyday.

Kim

Lisa - Nice hearing from you. I complain that it's been 50 degrees here due to the fog. It actually was 80 in Redding CA the other day, crazy. You look fab in your warm clothes. I hope you are doing well.

Kim

And YES we danced on tables!!!!

Hello peaches !!

What the hell are we waiting for ??!! we need to unite somewhere !!! would be so much fun, where ever that was wouldn't know what hit them!

Holly - right now looking at the LPN thing that's 2 years here and they currently have a bridge program with a local university that once you complete that you can do 2 years and get your RN which is my long term plan, so far biology is going good, its a lot of work, I study every night as I want to ace this.

Michelle - FFS is all I am saying, there is a light at the end of all of this shit

Have had follow ups this week with oncologists, surgeons blah blah and all is FANTASTIC !!

I have been hitting the gym hard and want to change this body !! I did something totally out of my element for my hubby for his bday which is in february, I Went and had some boudoir photos done hes going to shit.

DJJ - loved your pics so liberating !! you look fabulous, where is hard chest? LOL

Well the east coast is getting hammered today with a gong show of a storm, I am staying home no work or school for me today !!!

kisses

well if it's not one thing, it's a dozen others. sigh.

But first off.....Djj.....amazing pictures! and where is rock hard chest guy???? don't leave us hanging girlfriend! Lisa, love your bundled up photo! we have no snow here in North Dakota and it was 50 degrees here today....go figure. Kimie, i did the boudoir photos after i found out i had breast cancer just to have something to remember how i was "before" BC took over my life. I will attach one that is my favorite. Reading and catching up on you all....i've been bad about replying and just trying to get out of this damn funk i've found myself in.

I got home tonight from Mayo, I'll be getting the implant exchange in May. Right now the infection appears to be gone from the breast, but now i may have a new infection in my intestines. I have had terrible diarrhea since starting the clindamyacin (sp?) but just assumed it was a side effect which it could be, but the antibiotics can also cause a secondary infection to occur in the intestines and they are concerned that is what is happening. I should know is a couple of days once the culture comes back.

I just wanna cry. I'm tired, I'm crabby, I'm sick of feeling like shit.

This is the me that used to be.

Missy. You didn't end up with a C diff infection did you??? You are a prime candidate for that after being compromised and long term antibiotics.

Michelle - Beautiful picture. I am so sorry you are still dealing with this crap. Sending a hug your way.

I start Arimidex today. Should I take it in the Eve? I used to take the Tamox in the morning, but heard that you might get sleepy on it. Also, I don't have to get the shot once a month, as my MO feels that I am really in menopause.

Kim

C-DIFF test came back NEGATIVE!!!! Thank God! NO MORE ANTIBIOTICS finally!!!!!!!!!! woohoooooo!!!!!! I'm just gonna kick this month in the shitter and start all over fresh for February!!!!

Here's to new months, new starts, and no more infections!!! Cheers!