Starting Chemo in December 2013

Oh my goodness Mike's girl. Best wishes for a clean PET scan!

I am getting ready for my reconstruction, almost 2 year to the day from my MDX. Here is my evolution from 250cc to ending at 750cc...month 7 is when I had to be deflated before starting rads.

Lisa,

Ahhhhhh.... Cancer, the gift that keeps on giving. (This is said in my most sarcastic voice ever). I had my pulmonology follow up this past week. My pulmonary function tests are good. Some scarring on a chest X-ray and I'm still weaning off the steroids. Will have a follow up CT scan of my chest at the end of the year. the pulmonary guy said the CT scan shows more of what they look for than the X-ray. My cough didn't start until after radiation. So mine probably is the pneumonitis.

Hi ladies! Here is my blog post about chemo brain.

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Is chemo brain real? Many physicians didnt think so (especially prior to 1995). However they ( those scientists ) started researching this in 1995. I went to a Breast Cancer support group in souh Austin Tuesday evening. It was definitely a feat getting there. I was fortunate to be able to make an appt. for a counseling session for the girls a few hours before the meeting. I hate heading all the way up there unless I can accomplish several things at once. So after picking up Rhett from MDO, I headed to Austin (mind you I had already gone to physical therapy, had my second and sadly final free session with a personal trainer at the gym - thanks again mom for the membetship, and put in several hours of school time with the girls). I was pooped but I was really interested in the speaker.

I had been wanting to attend this group for a while. My main reason to go was the topic of "chemo brain". Unfortunately, I didn't feel like the group was the right "fit" for me (especially with the sacrifices i have to make to get there regularly) but again, I went this time for the speaker.

Her name was Ashley Hennegan, RN, BSN, MSN. She is a doctoral student of nursing at UT studying the effects of cancer treatments (primarily breast) on the brain and this elusive syndrome called "chemo brain" which she referred to as "Cancer Related Cognitive Dysfunction". That sounds so much better than "chemo brain". Sounds like a real side effect. The medical community is finally acknowledging that it is.

Initially it was thought to occur in only those patients who received chemo. And even at that, many physicians did not believe that chemo drugs used for breast cancer crossed the blood brain barrier.

They now know that some do. Doxorubicin is one of the chemo drugs that they know for sure crosses the blood/brain barrier. So of course I have to look it up (don't google, don't google... Aw man, I googled!) The trade name of doxorubicin is Adriamycin. The "A" in the "AC" portion of my first 4 chemo treatments. Also known by chemo patients as "the red devil". Lovely, right?

Any-who... Their studies have brought up even more interesting tidbits. 30% of patients complain of "chemo brain" symptoms at the time of diagnosis/surgery. In others words, before treatments such as chemo or radiation even start. The thought behind this is that the cancer itself (which causes a massive inflammatory response in the body ) may contribute to the "chemo brain". The areas of the brain most affected are the pre-frontal cortex (which controls executive functioning like learning new things, multitasking, flexibility,etc) and the Hipocampus (which controls memory and emotions).

There is so much more to this syndrome. But my thumb is tired from typing and I'm sure your eyes are fatigued from reading all this. Just remember the next time you ask me a question and I can't find the right word or if I have to ask you your name .... again; be kind and know that I can't help it.

Love to you all!! More health updates coming soon. I am still weaning off the steroids and still experiencing shortness of breath and pain. But I had more good days then bad last week and for that I am truly grateful!!

Ladies, I've started a new Advice topic: https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/69/topic/826508?page=1#post_4227373 I thought it would be a good way to talk about 'if I knew then what I know now" to help the other ladies who are just starting this journey.

Share your wisdom!

My sister's PET scan was CLEAR! Thanks for all your prayers

Hey beautiful ladies! hope you are all doing well tonight! I am healing.......doing as good as can be expected I guess! I had PET scan #2 today......i'm a bundle of nerves and will find out the results next Monday...say a prayer or two. Yay Mikesgirl on your sisters clean scan!! Such great news!

Is it funny to say I miss you all? ha....well i do. Funny how i've never met any of you in person, but you are all such a big part of my life, and when i'm stressing.....it's you all that I want to turn to, because you GET IT.

Hugs and love.

Michelle

yeah for good PET scans, congratulations for Mikesgirl's sister, and wishing for similar results for Michelle. I have to wait another week for mine. At least I am friends with the nuclear medicine doc so I can go over the results with her after it is done and will not have to wait for results. Holli good to hear your pulmonary problems are improving. Lisa hope for a good report on your lungs also.

Oranje, we have a new YMCA opening next month. Hopefully the pool will not be as cold as the old one. I may be tempted into going swimming more. I asked my BS last week if I had any limitations on working out with the port still in. She said I could anything, even upper body strength training so I may get back into the gym again. I feel like I lost a lot of strength over the last year away from the gym.

Holli, I am using chemo brain as en excuse for at least the next 6-12 months. I am definitely more forgetful, I eventually remember what I wanted but it is frustrating not to pull up the information immediately. At dinner last night it took me a while to remember "tamales", I could describe them but just could not quickly remember the word for them. I feel like an 80 year old some days.

Wishing everyone a great Thansgiving, this year we all have a lot to be thankful for. I will be having dinner at the nursing home with my husband and later in the evening a friend invited me over for a desert buffet.

Orange/ glad your doctor took care of that!

Mikesgirl/ great news!!!

JB- BRILLANT! our group has a lot to share, and anything to help I'm there!

Lisa- one year! I wasn't sad just proud! You should be too because you have inspired us on this board as well as beating Cancer.

Nothing like the holidays to make you angry lol. Heading to DH's family in FL now and the drama already! One thing that gets me upset more than anything is being ungrateful. This isn't just his family just in general! So many people this time of year are bitching about this or that. Moaning how their DH didn't get them a certain present or whatever. I really might go off on someone this year:). I'd rather keep the same car for the rest of life, never get a new house, or whatever if it meant I was promised 30 years! Life is the true blessing. I'll be thankful now

beautiful jodi, give 'em hell if they are ungrateful!

Keep the faith, Hi again. Wow, new avatar looks beautiful!

Heading to LI tomorrow morning for thanksgiving. Sisters, their families and my mom are there. Hoping to miss most of the storm. Leaving at 7am for a 5 hr drive! Fun, ugh! But family is great. Made 2 pies and pumpkin bread. Last thanksgiving I didn't bring a thing as only 3 days post lumpectomy. This year is sooooo much better. Have a new look but pretty much feel like my old self...on most days. Wow.

I am thankful for all of you and traveling this road together

Hi Ladies, I have been so busy this last few weeks I had a lot of catching up to do. I had a presentation due, a final exam, a paper due and I was packing and moving into my new house. I started to feel overwhelmed with it all. Then I thought "STOP" if I learned one thing this year is that life is too short to get stressed out. So I arranged my priorities. 1. Social life 2. School 3. Moving. I spent a lot of time with rock hard chest guy, I suppose I should name him at this point, Greg. I packed when I could and let the movers do the rest and I studied before bed. My new house is an absolute mess but I had fun with Greg and my friends so who cares. I'll get it unpacked soon enough. The before cancer me would have dropped everything to get it all unpacked and set up. The after cancer me left boxes piled up to the ceiling and went to a hot tub party :-)

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!! I'm in Colorado enjoy my sister and her family.

Mikesgirl, so relieved about your sister. And yes "SCREW STATISTICS!!!!!" We all have a right to melt downs every now and again!

Ornge_mama, I'm back to my high intensity workouts and my flexibility is fine. It's just the tender boob that pisses me off. I did a "High Intensity Interval Training" class on Monday and we had to do mountain climbers. On your hands with butt in the air and you alternating tapping toes in and out. Very intense. I was the only person in class doing them with a smile on my face. I was remembering when I could barely even walk and now I am doing mountain climbers with my feet smashing into the floor. I just kept smiling as sweat was dripping and repeating "F#ck Cancer"!!!! Felt so good!

Michelle, holding my breath with you until you get your results.

Lisa, fingers crossed they get an earlier opening. It seems like you would be priority to squeeze you in. Especially since your awesome :-)

JB, Love it,

Jodi, what a great attitude to have!

I hope I didn't miss anyone. I was so far behind.

anybody ever have a high EOS Auto on lab work? My appt. is this afternoon but i can view my lab results online and that is the only thing that is high, everything else is in the normal range and my CA-27 is only at a 13% so that is good.....i'm just concerned about this EOS Auto .......I looked it up and I do have asthma and I also just had surgery so could be from the inflamation from that.......God i hate the worrying. I, like quite a few of you have also had this nagging cough but then again, I always do this time of year so hoping and praying it is just that. I will keep you posted!

hope you are all doing well.........it's a little chilly out here today, -10 below zero with a wind chill close to -25 below. Anybody want to come visit me???? ha! can't say i blame you!

hugs and love........michelle

Well scan results are in and there is a small one centimeter area in left axiliary that they want to do an ultrasound on this week and possible biopsy. My MO feels it is probably scar tissue but wants to stay on the cautious side and make sure. So now my nerves are shot! Ugh. Pray for scar tissue!!!

All labs were great, the Eos Auto I was worried about is most likely from my asthma

well I had an awesome experience today (I'm being sarcastic)...

So I had my cervix dilated so they could take biopsies of my uterine lining. When they did the transvaginal ultrasound in the hospital in October. Uterus lining was thicker than it should've been with all of the hormone suppressing medications that I'm on. Could possibly signal uterine cancer. But when she did the biopsy today, which by the way felt like someone had on cleats and was jumping on my bladder, she couldn't get a lot of tissue and I didn't have a lot of bleeding. So she said this was actually a good sign. She feels confident that the biopsy will come back negative but she is erring on the side of caution. We will get results back in 1 to 2 weeks. I know the odds are in my favor for the biopsy to come back negative but it's still a scary thought.

I'll have a hysterectomy scheduled for February (she wants me off steroids for 4-6 weeks before performing surgery). I should find out the exact date tomorrow.

Hopefully about 6-8 weeks after the hysterectomy I will be able to finish my reconstruction.

I hope everyone had a wonderful thanksgiving. I do a neat thing with my girlfriends in Novemver. We text every day one thing we are thankful for. It really helps you focus on gratitude.

I blogged about it if y'all want me to post.

Lisa - if you PM me your email I will send you an invite to my blog.

Holli

Hello everyone!!! I have not been on in a couple of weeks and there is so much to catch up on...congrats to all who have passed their 1 year anniversary with clear mammos, tests and scans. Had my first mammo since surgery and I was so scared...I have "catered" to THAT breast and dreaded the thought of having it smashed...lol. No pain and a good result so I am happy. Waiting to have it read was giving me anxiety and took me back to a place I don't want to remember!!! Had blood drawn yesterday in prep for next weeks appointment with my MO to follow up with the thyroid issue. Not feeling much better but some days not so tired so maybe that is an improvement. The weight basically stayed the same but hey I didn't gain over the Thanksgiving holiday at least!!!

Now for my mini rant....it seems since I finished rads (I had chemo first, then surgery, and rads was last) everyone "thinks" I should be back to my normal self, forgetting the thyroid issue and the fact that it takes longer to do things. I was left alone cooking Thanksgiving dinner and barely could lift the turkey out of the oven!!! I had no energy left to put the leaf in the table or set it with the pretty china or even get properly dressed so we ate on paper plates and I went to bed very early....oh did I mention I was babysitting a 1 and a 3 year old while doing the cooking? I was so eager to do it up this year I never thought I would "run out of gas". I had a mini melt down and cried and felt a bit better. The thing is...I am not "myself"....a part of me is lost...yes I am grateful to be done and grateful to be cancer free but I feel so utterly alone. I look in the mirror and don't see "me" looking back...I try to have a conversation but loose my train of thought or I listen to others but hear only half what they say...but honestly I am comprehending half then my brain wants to go to sleep and they say I am not listening to them...my ankles hurt so bad and I can't wait until I can concentrate on fixing that issue since I was trying to do that just before being dx with BC and had to stop going to the doctors for that issue, my legs hurt since after surgery and gaining weight a long with my back, I am sleepy but some days feel energetic and now I want to go through the house like a tornado get it cleaned and start decorating for Christmas. I only put up a very small white tree last year with pink and copper ornaments and a wreath on my door since I started my chemo on Dec. 12th and knew I would not feel up to taking everything down and putting it away....all I want for Christmas is to find all my pieces and start putting them back together...I want "me" back!!!

Thanks for listening ladies!!!

Char