BC Husbands and Boyfriends Hangout

Hi Fumi, good to see you here. I've seen you on other threads. That castle is fantastic and I love all the blossom.
Hi cowgirl, sorry to hear about the goat. He's at peace now though.
Hugs all,
Mags
xxx

I too missed it! What a view!

Thanks for the warm welcome, Greg!

I'm glad you started this thread. Altho' I do try to be supportive, caring, loving, it is tedious knowing what to say--and what NOT to say! I even speak about this w/my female boss at work--we have a great repoire & she, of course, is also concerned of my wife's condition and progress.

She, herself, has lost friends & family to it. So, when she asks me how Vera is doing...I give her the only reports I know how to give--and she understands--and I believe Vera understands...so if I should ever offend ANYONE on this board...I am not making careless statements...but indeed, very thought-out and labored-over thoughts, replies, questions!

Some women on this site indicate being offended by the kindest intentioned comments & querries, ergo, in not wanting to exacerbate things...sometimes I simply fall silent! I do think my wife is lucky/blessed that her cancer was diagnosed early enough that she didn't require a mastectomy and/or chemo therapy. Some would comment & say, yeah lucky...you try having cancer bud--then would you like hearing such a comment? Well, my reply is a resounding YES! I would be damned happy if such were my case. And I mean this in the lovingest way I know how. Yes cancer sucks! Yes, it is totally horrible that anyone ever gets it--but--reality sucks.

So, all I mean here is...I'm trying, ladies! I'm truly attempting to project myself into your shoes! I am not in the least making light of ANYONE who has cancer in any degree. I am as much in-love with my wife as I was when first we met...13 years ago tomorrow! I love spending time with her more than with anyone else! I miss it when we don't eat together, see movies together, drive to & fro together, ad infinitum. So, I'm in for the count--no matter what! OK, I've said too much; I haven't said enough! I make no quick/careless remarks--trust me!

Ty-K

Quote:

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Some women on this site indicate being offended by the kindest intentioned comments & querries, ergo, in not wanting to exacerbate things...sometimes I simply fall silent! I do think my wife is lucky/blessed that her cancer was diagnosed early enough that she didn't require a mastectomy and/or chemo therapy. Some would comment & say, yeah lucky...you try having cancer bud--then would you like hearing such a comment? Well, my reply is a resounding YES! I would be damned happy if such were my case. And I mean this in the lovingest way I know how. Yes cancer sucks! Yes, it is totally horrible that anyone ever gets it--but--reality sucks.

---

People, well within their rights, do react quite differently. I made several posts when I first joined in the other sections that repeatedly referred to perspective. It's truly impossible to understand until you've been in those shoes, and even if you've been in someone else's shoes, it's easy to forget what it was like after you've been thrown a big curve ball. Those who've not dealt firsthand with cancer have no idea how to react as a coworker or friend. And how should they know? I certainly didn't, and even now having gone through this with my wife, I'm still not good at talking to a coworker who is going through breast cancer treatments. So while friends family and coworkers should purposely make jackarses out of themselves, people, no matter their condition, need to let a few dumb things pass, otherwise one can spend a lot of time burning bridges and wasting energy on negative thoughts that don't do a bit of good.

So go ahead, screw up and say something dumb, just try and do it in the family section so we can help cover up your mistake.

Thanks Carrie,

You could never, never, never ever intrude! Please comment whenever the Spirit moves you! I understand you waiting for Greg or Shemp to reply...but I wasn't! LOL Your reply was very kind, understanding, reflective, etc. Please never hold back! Let it out! Explode with the words forming inside you at the time...lest they be forever lost! I appreciate your most gracious comments! Yeah, I'm a lucky guy that evilelf is still with me 13 years after our first encounter! May I tell you about it?! Rather unusual.

We met before the internet AND EMAIL was around as it is today! We met through a Personal Ad I had placed in a local weekly mag--under people meeting people.
Remember those?

Anyway, I had said that I was an escaped convict from a Mental Institution...and she answered it! Anybody could say: white male seeks white female, love movies, dining out, candlelit dinners, hiking, blah blah blah--but how many people would advertise the way I did? Just me!

Anyway, 13 years ago today: May 31, 1993...we met at a local Denny's for a coffee date. She was my very first & only coffee date. I was her 26th! Damn! If I had gone thru half that many coffee dates & not found a possible...I'd have given up & tried something else. But she didn't!

elf said most of her 'dates' lasted 1/2 an hour--if that long. Ours was 3 hours long. And she pulled outta her purse a list of questions for me, which I've commonly referred to as The Dead Sea Scolls...ever since. But they were all great questions...all having to do w/compatibility issues! She said one dude she 'interviewed' didn't even know what a museum was! Whoa Nellie. Good luck for him, eh!

Anyway, our first date went well. Oh, one other unusual thing about it--I was the only man who refused to take her phone number! That's right! She asked if I'd call her & I said no! I said, you call me the first time--then I'll know you're serious! If you call me the first time--I'll call you every time after! Well, here we still are...13 years later!

So, Carrie--please do answer/reply/comment anytime & thanks ever so much!

Shemp, you Stooge you--hola!

And thanks for your many & kind & well-expressed comments!
Altho' Carrie mistakenly thinks I'd rather have a man's opinion--not true. I don't buddy up well w/other men. Don't drink or smoke or like any sports. I'm a true loner. Even at work, I am a 1-man island. I chat long & hard here but am quiet at work...wouldn't know I'm there most of the time. I don't seek others, they all come to my cube. Why? One of life's lil mysteries! Anyway--thanks Shemp! Ciao 4 now!

Ty-K
[Why Tytanium-K? Because I have a permanent titanium rod in the middle of my left femur, from my knee to my hip...and my first name is Ken--hence Tytanium-K. Why Ty instead of Ti? Because the first 3 letters spell a word not allowed on some websites, plus the 'y' is more distinctive anyway!] Oh, and why do I have a titanium rod in my left femur? Can we talk motorcycles sometime, esp regarding a certain accident on my Harley Springer on Mother's Day in an intersection 2 years ago? Them Caddy SUV's hurt! Ouch!

Hi Ty-k, I'm one of the ones who was told that I was lucky that they found my cancer early and didn't like it lol. Were you referring to me (said very tongue in cheek)? Thought I'd better explain that that was humour there as there are too many nasty threads going on at the minute and I didn't want to start one here by mistake. Welcome Ty-k. You can say whatever you want here. It is for people giving support not survivors like me but Greg so graciously invited all the lurkers in one day and that is how I ended up here.
Hi Greg and Shemp, glad to see that you've turned up at last lol.
Hi Carrie and Terynsmom, I posted in What the heck so won't take up more space here lol.
Have to go to work now. Catch you all later.
Hugs
Mags
xxx

I think you guys are cool. Not everything has to be drama.

Ferne

Whazzup mags!

Awesome that you are English! I love how 'Brits' talk! I could listen for hours--and wouldn't care what you were even saying! Always been fascinated w/the accent! [Yeahhhh, Baby! Courtesy of Michael Myers] Heh! Love Kate Ashfield in Shaun of The Dead--one of my favorite movies--bet I've watched it 10 times! Too dang funny!! Have U seen it?

See if you can wire SOUND on your future posts~LOL. No apology necessary! Be sarcastic! MISSbehave! U R fine. Hugs returned! xoxo

Ty-K

mags,

No, never seen Goal: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0380389/
but I gotta tell ya' I'm not very sports-oriented so it's one I'll pass on! My forte is Romantic Comedies and Horror, hence Shaun of the Dead...contains all three! I was joking about wiring for sound--I'm not teckkie enuf either! Yeah, Shaun...is a really excellent movie IMHO. And I own a lotta movies--well over 1,000 dvds...and growing!

Altho' I'm unfamiliar with Geordies...is it a bit like cockney, perhaps? Take care, mags!

Ty-K

Hi everyone!
Cowgirl ~ so glad you are back and had a good time
I missed you! Densie is still in SC she called Sat.
and said she is having a wonderful time.

Greg ~ So glad to see you, sun burn ouch, my Dh
is the only person I know that can burn sitting in the shade!
I would try some of DW's rad cream .
sounds like you had a good time though.

Mags~
If I ever hit the lottery or come into some money I am going to Greece
and to Japan to see Fumi, so you guys get the guest rooms ready
and I am bringing the Bike!

Ty~ In a earlier post you were saying you ride
So do DH and I he has a dresser I have a
sportster got my lisence when I turned 40
after years of riding on the back heres
some pics



Me on my first bike


DH on his Dresser/Mistress


Bike Week Daytona ( Me and DH) 98


Wild Bills Biketoberfest 99


DH Me and my Step sister Carm
biketoberfest Fla.

Hugs Everyone

Carrie

Hi all,
good to see you Greg - looking a little bit pink there lol.
Sorry about the sunburn. Bf got a touch of flu and told me he could understand a little bit more about my hot flashes lol.
Cowgirl good to see you back from your trip. It's funny hearing you talking about looking for Clark's shoes as Mum always made me wear them when I was a kid. They had all the different width fittings and I had wide feet. No big deal now as they make nicer shoes or is it just that I am older. They were really old-fashioned when I was young lol.
Oh my Carrie just discovered that I hang out with bikers and their chicks Never mind you coming to Greece, I'm coming to America.
Ty-k trying to think of a debate topic but just finished work so little grey cells are too tired. I'm off tomorrow so I'll give it some more thought then.
Hugs all
Mags
xx

Wow Shemp!
Everything you 2 are doing, I have to take a nap just reading it all lol!

It is so nice to hear from you and how you both are doing.

Sorry to hear about DW's trouble with her arm and her scare.

Good to here Aunt Flo is back (I guess lol )A sign that things are recovering from treatment.

Hugs,
Carrie

Hi friends, it's coming up to the two yearly anniversary of my op so I am going to be so busy doing all the tests. Ct scan that doctor ordered is already booked. It's a pain in the neck here as I do the tests in so many different places. Going to be doing tests for the next 6 weeks lol. Was thinking that I should spend the days off this week relaxing on the beach before it all starts.
Cowgirl hope your mom's move went ok.
Hugs to all
Mags