Calling all TNs

My good things for today:

My animals are being crazy today! I let the chickens out and they ran over to my neighbors yard and started walking in a line like cops in crime scene investigation, they were looking for bugs. It was too funny.

Then my goats jumped the fence to go to my neighbors to pick up the plums that have dropped from the tree. Neighbor says he doesn't mind, less cleanup for him.

My dogs are acting like puppies, running around in fast circles. They all must know summer is coming to an end and want to enjoy every last minute of the nice weather.

Thinking of everyone, it has been slow on this thread.

Dawn-I am hoping the rads are offering some relief for you and knocking those tumors into oblivion.

Hope-Thinking of you.

Had a smashing time - well my nose and cheekbone did.

Was sent to this thread from another thread. I am a little over a week from getting all my tests from all my treatments and the painic, tears and sleepless nights are back agian!!

Inmate I know I am new but BIG OLE PRAYERS going up. Once in a lifetime is enough!!!! AND ENOUGH ALREADY is being screamed right here and now. Being new to this board, I do not know how to pm on here yet but I fb a lot  As for me I usually figure things out sooner or later. LATELY later has been more of me than sooner

Lory48 you already answered one of my questions. DA PORT!! I sware I hate mine and I hate getting it flushed but that should be the least of my worries. Had someone tell me she has had hers for 7 years and I panicked without thinking DUH she must have been going through a lot more herself. Cancer does S-U-C-K!! bigtime!! So I am just going to nickname mine and be grateful they have progressed from when all my mothers veins collasped from her treatments and cancer. BE GRATEFUL....BE GRATEFUL....BE GRATEFUL....

PRAYERS to EVERYONE!!

Bak - love the animal escapades - especially the chickens - too funny. thanks

Hi Ladies - Need some input please. When starting Chemo, my MO said that there were no diet restrictions and to eat whatever I wanted to including my daily high protein and vitamin packed smoothies. I read on a blog yesterday that Vitamins and other suppliments may have a negative impact on Chemo treatment. Did your MO's tell you to stop taking Vitamins during treatment? I'm freaking out now wondering if I trashed 4 months worth of challenging treatment......

Thanks Bornto..... CoQ10 is one of the antioxidants that I've been taking. Will stop now, but really worried about the impact of the last 4 months of a vitamin packed diet. Shouldn't they tell us these things?! Like this cr@p isn't hard enough on us!

I always took vitamins (multi, b12, c, glocosomine and fish oil) however, when I went to my onco she said stop all of them because they could interfere with treatment.  On days when my energy is running low I would love to take my b12.

HUGE panic attack today. The little hard spot along one of my incisions, which I had my oncologist check last week, seemed to me to be a big lump when I examined it today. It is the same shape as the tumour in my breast was, although smaller in size. I became convinced it was more cancer, despite my being in the midst of chemo, and I melted down. As in totally. As in snivelling, bright red, snotty, incoherent mess.

I called my breast surgeon, but couldn't get an appt for 2 more days. I called my oncologist in a state of utter panic; I could barely breath. I was told that it was almost surely scar tissue and they would definitely check it at my chemo treatment tomorrow, but I could come by right away if I wanted to. You know I flew over there at top speed.

Yup, it is just scar tissue in my oncologist's opinion. The same scar tissue he examined a few days ago. So what did I do when he told me that? I fell apart in his office. Started sobbing, and begging him to please tell me how to stay alive, and I don't want anyone else to raise my babies, and and and...

Omg, I have been cool as a cucumber at all my appointments thus far. I only freak out in private, generally in the middle of the night. But I sure lost it today. Sigh.

And I didn't cancel the appointment in 2 days with my surgeon. I figure it can't hurt to get another opinion.

DesertMama- I noticed something similar on the scar line under my arm a few days ago and am trying to be rational and not to panic and am thinking it must surely be scar tissue or something, possibly aggravated by the chemo (I've done two of six FEC-T).  I have an appointment for pre-chemo blood work tomorrow and will get it checked then.

I haven't posted here before, but I've been reading the comments regularly (stalking!) since being diagnosed in June.  It's been a really helpful source of information and comfort during a difficult time.  I'm 37 and I've now come to terms with the situation and see the treatments as a job to be done.  Luckily the chemo so far has been manageable, even if not entirely pleasant.  What I find most difficult at the moment though is thinking about the long-term, especially in relation to my two daughters (aged 8 and 12).  I've always been a planner (and a bit of a control freak!), so coming to terms with the fact that, apart from a few lifestyle changes, there's nothing I can do to influence the future has been difficult.  It really helps to hear long-term survivor stories and to know that there are many people who have gone through this and are still doing well after many years.

DesertMoma I cried as I read your post I could see myself doing the same thing.  No one can every prepare you for how emotional bc is, I believe it is worse then the chemo and last a lot longer.

Anyboday else dreading PINKTOBER???  The ads are starting again......sigh.  It's not that I do not appreciate fundraising for awareness but I want a CURE, Dammit. 

Ditto NavyMom....

I'm getting out my F*CK AWARENESS FIND A CURE shirt very soon (and the "*" is *my* addition.... the word is spelled out on the shirt)

Anyway, I'm never in here anymore.... skim to the last page and read about once a month. Hope everyone is hanging in there best they can. I'm still keeping busy with boats, horses, animals, teaching at the nature center. Plus, I apparently did such a nice job organizing a regional 4 day carriage driving event that they want me to be the regional director. Off to Wisconsin end of month for the annual meeting. I'm pretty excited about it cause, though many of you know my lifestyle, I'm happy to have something purposeful to focus on (being one of those empty nesters who's kids are all growed up).

Cheers.... see you in another  month!

PS- I almost never think about BC anymore, except when I think of my friends in here! It's so great if/when you can get to that point.

My dr's told me to eat or drink whatever I want.  In moderation...

HeidiToo - Wow, it has been a long time since you logged in girl!  We have missed your wonderful nature pictures.  Good to hear from you.

My Oncologist is moving to Seattle, they told me on Friday.  I cried and cried at work.  I realized that I connected him to my cancer journey.  I can't describe the feelings I had, it was of fear, sadness, high level of anxiety, and many such mixed emotions.  I have booked one last appointment with him on Thursday, then they will transfer my case to one of the other doctors in that office, there is a new lady doctor, and the remaining doctor is also a woman.  I don't do very well with women doctor chemistry's, so not sure what I will do.  The last doctor is a man, who as you all know, I had at first and had to change him to my current doctor. I am so devastated with him leaving, but I have got to remain with the group, I feel they know me and they will understand me better than if I joined a brand new group.  I have a really very hard time with changes.

Dawn - sweetie, I have been thinking about you non-stop.  If love can heal, as they say that it does, then I am sending you so much love your way, hoping that you will get healed this time.