Anyone Starting Chemo Jan. 2010?

Hi Ladies, I had the toughest day today.  I had to put my maine coon cat Creamsicle to sleep.  He was around 18 years old.  I adopted him when he was around 11.  He had the softest fur, just like a bunny.  Talk about BFF's.  My BF Nancy is the best.  She really came through for me today.  I called her this morning hysterical about the cat.  He was fine yesterday walking around and eating and drinking and using the litterbox.  At around midnight he had some sort of attack.  Nancy thinks he was in congestive heart failure.  She is a cardiac nurse.  She told me if I needed her to take me to the vet just let her know.  I watched him for a bit and he seemed to be deteoriating, so I made the fateful call to the vet.  She came over and went with me.  Animals are so sweet and loving, it is hard to say goodbye and no matter how many times you do it, it never gets any easier.

When we left the vets office she wanted to take my mind off it.  She will be moving the end of next month.  She took me to see her new place.  She lives about 2 miles from me now.  She will still be in the same town, but her new place is about 5 miles from me.  Glad she will still be close.  We also stopped at 2 estate sales then at Dunkin Donuts for some iced coffee.  We came back to my place and she hung with me awhile.

Even though there are still 3 cats and a dog here with me, I can feel the void.

VegasDiva--my heart goes out to you. The exact same thing happened with my 17 pound orange tabby, Morris, about 3 months ago. I also have an 18 1/2 year old cat, Tomkin, and I know his days are numbered. I have 2 other younger cats. Metania, has barely ;eft my side sine my mastectomies--before that she was aloof and never went to people. Now she sleeps with me every night in the crook of my arm. Moishe--I picked up in the park the same day I lost Morris--he was a stray I'd been feeding, and the cat carrier was there because I'd just left Morris at the vet's. They mean so much to me. I cannot tell you how sorry I am. I am a huge animal lover and have animals around me my whole life. It never gets any easier when I lose one. Prayesr to you and Creamsicle. I'm sure he had the best life with you,

Vegas Diva - so sorry for your loss!  last weekend we had to put our Doberman to sleep too.  These animals become such a large part of the family that when their time is up, it is like the loss of a family member.  I always tell my kids when we need to put an animal to sleep that we are doing the right thing because tha animal is suffering and doesn't understand why we can't help them.  it's not fair to keep ananimal alive just because we will miss them.  In fact, animals have much more humane endings than most humans.

Hang in there and remember all of the great memories that you have with your beloved cat. 

Hi Ladies , just an update for the gals that are interested in the Taxol SE , Thsi past Wed was my 2 treatment . I'm not sure if it is because I know now what to expect or that the SE's are more managable . Thursday I was great come Friday after noon I could feel my body shutting down . Fatiques and muscle twitches Some of these made be jump out of my seat . One thing that was scary is when I walk sometime my knee gives out / Wreid feeling . Little trouble with bowels but with diet and laxative got that takend care of . One big thing I did notice is my eyes are not running as much , which is huge for me . My eyes were so puffy and sore . Today is day 4 and very sleepy today little muscle ache  took a mid afternoon bath and a pill and slept .

I need to know from you gals what your feelings are on this issue I have . I jsut love my ocologist doc In fact he has treatment my brothe in law and my father in law who did pass many years ago /

On my last visit I said ok I'm coming to the home stretch here in regards to treatment . Is there a test (PET Scan) that I will get for like a base line . How will I know that there is no spread.? His answer was to go and live my life happily , don't worry for the next 20 years for something that might not even be there . 20 years will come and you would have worried for nothing . I told him that with 9 nodes involved I have to be real and he said Linda I have had far worse women with 20 nodes and they life a long happy life .He said I feel with the chemo and radiation along with the 5 year pill ( not to mention trial pill i take for my bones ) your  going to be fine.  I guess my question is how are you other ladies getting piece of mind about this situation we are in .

Don't get be wrg I'm happy to take his advice and go skipping into the sunset but I don't want to fall into another pot hole . Fondly Linda

gramoflexus - I thought they were routine too if the lymph nodes were involved at all.  As for me I want the peace of mind.  My chemo is before the surgery/ radiation and between 2tx and 3tx my onc and surgeon ordered a bone scan/ CAT scan also another breast MRI just to see if the chemo was working and just to make sure it hadn't spread anywhere else.  It didn't and I was greatly relieved.  Statistics are one thing but peace of mind is something else again. 

Thanks for the info on Taxol SE.  I start #1 on 4/1 and am nervous about the SEs.  My friend who went thru this 6 yrs ago said the worst (AC) is over now.  The SEs from Taxol are muscle aches and pains for a few days, fatigue as usual (no gettin' away from that one) and possible neuropathy.  I too have the puffiest sore watery burning eyes and nose and will be so glad when that's history.  I hope that's the end of the cytoxan experience for me..........nasty stuff.

I would skip into the sunset with the scan done. 

Glamoflexus - Thanks for the update on your Taxol experience.  I have my 2nd Tx on Tuesday and feel like that is when I will truly find out how I handle it.  I was so tired and sick when I went for my 1st Tx that I am not sure what the true SE were.  I had the muscle "twinges" some of which made me gasp.  I met with my onc on Friday and the only concern is that I am dealing with some Neuropathy.  She said they don't like to see that after the first treatment.  I can handle it no matter how bad it gets as long as it goes away eventually.  I know some people have never regain their complete feeling.

As for testing after treatment, I am not sure what the Standard of Practice is for node postive but I am not expecting any scans unless I have a problem.  I don't like that but on the other hand many times the scans show things that are probably not a problem but they just want to "watch" them.  I don't think I could relax if that was the case.  I have heard that when BC metastasizes, there are symptons (pain, discomfort) as opposed to BC in the breasts that is typically asymptomatic.  We just need to pay attention to our body.  I wish this part of the journey was clearer.  I wish is was more black and white unfortunately it is very grey!

I had a nice experience at the grocery store on Friday.  I was wearing a baseball cap and was looking at display case.  I man came up to me, put his hand on my shoulder and said something like "Good luck to you" and then squeezed my shoulder.  The thing that struck me was that there was true compassion in his eyes no pity.  I had never seen him before.  I was touched.

I am having my 6th (& hope final) Taxotere/Herceptin on March 31st.  Surgery to follow.  I do get some 'twinges" in the area around my tumour (originally 5cm).  I like to think it's the chemo killing off the cancer cells.   My oncs have only used "finger" measurements - however, I did have ultrasound after 2 A/C tx, which showed the tumour had not shrunk at all and they stopped those treatments and put me directly onto the Tax.  At least not having the surgery first showed that the A/C wasn't working.

I know what you mean about the pets - I have a 10 yr. old Border Collie - last week we noticed that he had some swelling in his under-carriage, and tomorrow morning he is having surgery to find out what it is (although the dog is really active and isn't in any pain - still acting like a puppy).  Vet doesn't think it is anything life threatening, but I feel terrible about it all the same.

PM me if you wish - I am thinking about my options for upcoming surgery - having trouble deciding whether it will be a uni- or bi-lateral.  Wish someone else could make this decision for me.

Hi Tamatar and Vegas Diva - my condolences on the loss of your pets.  Our cats and dogs give unconditional love.  I'm so sorry.

I last posted on Friday and I'll give an update on the days post first Taxol -  Friday afternoon the fatigue hit again (steroid must have worn off), I was dead tired Sat and Sun and still fatigued today (day 7).  Fortunately I have had no pains, no aches, none of those side effects and no further tingling in my hands.  However, my skin continues to deteriorate.  My hands are cracked and bleeding and I'll have to get something stronger than vasoline and lotion. I also noticed that my eyelashes are falling out and my eyebrows are even thinner.  Pretty soon I am going to cover myself in thick blue gel and try out for the Blue Man Group.  I look like a pale cousin.

I'm doing the 12 weekly Taxol so the SEs might be less since the dosage weekly is less than biweekly. I have to go tomorrow for my next Taxol treatment and hope the next week was as side effect-free as this week was.  The horror of the AC is receeding in my mind and on my body.  YEA!

Hugs everyone,

Pat

Hey Marmalade--Regarding recon: If I knew then what I know now!!! The recon process has been dificult for me-painful, but I'm part way through and will at least do implants, if not the nipple and tattoo part. I keep telling myself I'll be glad I did it in the long run. But if I understood what I was signing up fori n the beginning, I probably would have opted out of the recon too. I felt so pressured to make a decision at the time, but that's all water under the bridge now.

1marmalade1 - how did your doggie do with his surgery?

 My eyebrows are almost completely gone.  I can pretty much count the hairs left on each of them.  I use Smashbox Brow Tech.  It is a powder and brush that make a pretty good eyebrow.  I also use Fiberwig mascara which really adds bulk to your lashes.  You can get both at Sephora.

VegasDiva:  Doggy is doing OK - acting really sucky, though, and getting everything he wants!  Looks cute with the cone on his head (guess he's not liking it much!)  Vet says it was just a cyst, but is having it analyzed anyways.  Thanks for asking.

PumpkinSoup:  Did they give you something for the mouth sores?  Seems they have something for all the SE's.  I have been using Biotine since day one, rinsing about 3 times a day, and brushing at least 3 times a day as well.  I didn't run into any problems at all, although my SIL had problems when she was having chemo for leukemia.  Sorry this has been painful for you, and hope you get some relief soon.

I think I have pretty much made up my mind about the bi-lateral.  Seems to me there are more pros than cons on the issue, I just have to make sure I've made peace with the decision and forge ahead.

Sending best wishes and positive thoughts to all - g'night!