I need a mentor

The Passion had a few unfortunate 'special effects' but it really was a great movie.

-Mostly considered outrageously and unacceptably violent, but what an irony that is in a world that stands by and watches it happening in real life.  We are an interesting species!

Held, thank you for this thread...and to all the wonderful ladies who have posted their insight and wisdom...I say thank you as well!! I have been one of the readers...and nodders!

I have really enjoyed your posts, and have gained so much wisdom...thanks!!

Lisa

((((((((((((((((((Hugs Held))))))))))))))))))))   especially for the surgery tomorrow.  I'm new on this journey of breast cancer but have known the Lord for many years and am truly humbled and amazed by the depth of love I see on these discussion boards and chat rooms. Isn't it interesting how so many of us come here as strangers and yet find love, comfort and support in this crazy world called cancer. Is it coincidence that in the midst of the trial that seemed so scary, and out of control that friendship and laughter and hope can appear? Even like you Held I'm finding that friends and family are making the time to be close and to love, something that doesn't happen very often in this world today when everyone is in such a hurry. I have 3 brothers very busy with their own families and lives who lately are making sure they take the time to email or call or have my family over for dinner. Friends stop by and call to see how I'm doing. I'm thinking even here in the valley of cancer the Lord is showing me a new thing or two. Maybe we could all settle on a chat time in the chat room where we can talk to each other. You pick an evening maybe thats good for you Held since you started this journey and those of us who can will meet you there as we walk this road together.

Amen and amen. 

  Held, I know God will be with you during your surgery. Whenever I go into surgery I imagine God walking into the operating room with me holding my hand and I quote the verse: When  I am afraid I will trust in God.  (somewhere in psalms)

 I think one of satan's best tactics to keep us from God is all those why's.  Why did this awful thing happen, why is that person living well when they're such a revolting human being, why does this single mom have bc, etc.  They are questions that may never be answered in this life, but they can sure churn up a lot of anger, confusion and seperation from God, the very thing we need to cling to.  I'm not saying not to question, questioning is never a bad thing - sometimes you just have to believe that God is in charge and God is good.

On a different note: I pray very specifically for myself and the people I pray for.  I pray with the expectation that my prayers will be answered.  I didn't always pray that way, I wasn't sure God really did heal people, or that he really would answer my prayers.  Having cancer has changed that.  Shortly after I was diagnosed one of my oldest friends came to stay with my family after my mastectomy.  She was the least likely person I have ever known to be a missionary and yet God took her and her family to Ecaudor for six years.  When she came back she had been to a Healing institute run by Francis McNutt.  She had been trained in healing prayer.  Having been going to pretty white bread suburban churches, we don't normally do healing, speaking in tongues, that sort of thing so I was very skeptical.  If she hadn't been a friend for over 30 years I would have thought she was nuts.  Long story short, I prayed with her and it was a remarkable, interesting and uplifting  experience.  I wasn't physically healed at that time, but spiritually I was.  My friend has since started a ministry full time praying for healing and she has many stories of miraculous healings.  She prays very specifically about side effects from chemo, I have had less since she started praying.  I'm getting to tired to finish.  And I'm afraid this will start sounding like gibberish.  I'm glad to have found this thread. Gay

HELD. Eager to hear how your surgery went. Prayers for you tonight.

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Im dancing a happy dance for our friend Held, God bless you that you will heal good, That all things that are to come are happy things. God loves you and so do I! Take care, Debbie

Still praying for you, Held! I wish doctors would realize how hard the waiting is for us and do everything they can to get results to us quickly!

An old standby for times of fear: The 23rd Psalm 

((((HUGS)))

Diane

Hi Held I finally got around to doing a google search of the song Held.  I thought I would share the link with you ladies

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2m1HZekCcc&NR=1

 I hope your ultrasound comes out well

I just had one yesterday for a lump in my neck

My B-Day is the 9th of Oct

Last year I thought I was so healthy but I'm so scared they are going to find more wrong with me

Whoooooooooooohooooooooooooooooo HELD!!

What great news. TERRIFIC. Celebrate. I'm so very, very happy for you. Doing the happy dance.

Yes, just like statistics which can be 'manipulated' to prove a point, it's possible to use scripture in a way that that does more harm than good. Knowing the context of a verse is also important.

Keep asking, keep sharing, keep questioning, keep opening doors for others.

Sleep deeply.

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Held,

The best thing I can tell you about developing that personal relationship is to have a healthy prayer life and to invite God into your thoughts and activities. For me, that relationship developed during a time that was quite difficult for me; it was not hard at all for me to include God in all of my thoughts/activities because I truly needed Him to get me through. I called on Him often to help me through the day...and I also remembered to thank him for doing so. The more I talked to him (prayed),  the more natural it felt to include Him in everything I do.  Once you establish that day-to-day relationship, it becomes easier to discern those things which come from God and those things that come from the enemy. 

I suppose it's like any other relationship we may have in that it has to be fed and fostered. Just as you make an effort to communicate with a friend or lover, you must make that effort with God, too.  He won't ever turn his back on you, but I can tell you how much easier it is getting through the day when you have developed that relationship with Him.

If you need guidance for bible study, there are lots of free resources online to help you. There is one site (don't have the name right now, but will look it up for you if you're interested) that will email you a daily verse to study. There are a couple of sites that have a calendar you can print out that will help you read through the entire Bible in a year (I think they have other time-periods as well). One in particular that I have used in the past sort of "jumps around" a bit rather than having you start at Genesis and end in Revelations. I liked that one a lot. 

I had more to say, but I've taken my sleep meds and feel like I'm not making too much sense!

I hope everyone is well.

((((HUGS)))
Diane 

I love the honesty and transparency of this discussion thread -- Forgive me in advance for the length of this post, but this is what I felt was important to share in regards to the question" how to develop a deeper relationship with God".... for many, this may seem so basic.... but there may be some who may read this thread in the future, who are confused about what a "relationship with God" really means, and don't know there is a specific beginning point which launces them on their rewarding journey of relationship with God.  There may be some who have family members or friends who could possibly be helped by what is shared below, so if I have helped just one person (just like that one person who helped me start my relationship with Jesus, so many years ago) .... I will have done my job.  This is what I felt led to share:

The "you" in the words below is for all of us!  I'm not writing to any one specific person on this thread, I just feel like God said someone who will read this, needed  help to understand.......

God loves you.  He created you for relationship with Him.  The very beginning point of relationship with God, which needs to be clearly understood and not overlooked, is the step of salvation - which is simply to accept Jesus into your heart as your personal Lord and savior.  I know this sounds so basic..... but you'd be surprised at the number of people in churches who really have not fully understood the gospel (i.e "good news') message. and therefore are just "going through the motions', and are getting very discouraged because they lack joy and power, and don't seem to be growing.   In fact, that's how you could have described me for many years....Growing up, my family members and I were not christians.  I was invited to many church services by  highschool friends for many years as a teen, and surprisingly never heard the gospel message clearly preached.  Therefore I tried to "do" things that christians do, but didn't have the power of the Holy Spirit, or a relationship with Christ to live the life of victory that I so desperately needed and wanted!  (I came from a very dysfunctional family)  Because I never understood the full scope of who Jesus was, why He came, and how to begin a relationship with Him, I made many poor choices and lost hope.  Sadly, I lived many painful years, suffering the consequences of my upbringing and my own poor choices, but GOD sent a person (I met on vacation) to explain the very basic foundation of where a relationship with God all begins!!!  This made ALL the difference! Before I understood this truth, I thought because I attended church, this made me a christian.  I like how one bible teacher put it, "just because I sit all day in the garage, doesn't make me a car."  :-)  Sitting in a church pew doesn't make one a christian. 

So, to save any future readers the mess I went through until I finally understood the beginning point, here it is: 

 It all starts with recognizing who Jesus is (the Son of God, born of a virgin, who lived a sinless life), why He came (A: to "seek and save the Lost" -- He came to rescue us from our SIN,  i.e.all of our wrongdoings, wanting to live life our own way, the very things that have kept us separated from relationship with God, and "dead in sin"   B:  restore us back in relationship with the Father-), how He accomplished that (because He was the perfect Son of God, and never sinned, therefore He could rightfully take our place on the cross, becoming our substitute, and pay the penalty for our sins, which is death. The Bible says, "The wages of sin is death".)  He didn't stay in the grave, He ROSE AGAIN, and by putting our trust in Him, He now provides a way to be restored in relationship with God our Father.  God's solution:  If we believe in what Jesus did for us,(putting our full trust in Him to rescue us from our sins... kind've like a drowing man who reaches for the life preserver as his ONLY hope. The bible says, "Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you WILL be saved"!) and ask Him to be our Lord and Savior, (call on Him to save/rescue us from sin, and invite Him into our lives to guide us)..... He will do just that!  Then His Holy Spirit comes to live inside of us. 

 When Jesus rose to heaven on the third day, He said He would send the Holy Spirit, who will "live in you."  When we accept Christ, we actually become "new" or "born again" in our spirit!  Our spirit, which was dead in sin, is made ALIVE in Christ!  The bible says we become "a new creation in Christ."  The Bible refers to the Holy Spirit as our "Counselor," our "comforter", our friend... and will "teach us, and lead us into all truth".  We aren't left alone.  We have a Helper - the living spirit of Christ within -- to guide us along our journey.

Again, I know this is basic, but it is FOUNDATIONAL. - I'm sharing this basically for any who may come along this post, and not really know what it means to "accept Christ".  This is the starting point, which cannot be skipped.  :-)  Once we have said a simple prayer, something like:  "Jesus, I believe you are the Son of God, you died on the cross to save me, and rose again.  I ask you to come into my life and save me.  Help me to live for you.  In Jesus' name. "  Then we are adopted into the family of God!!! 

From there, we can now begin to GROW in our relationship with God.  

In a nutshell:

1.  The Bible is God's love letter to us, and the quickest way get to know the character and nature of God.  Jesus said, "If you've seen me, you've seen the Father."  Reading the gospels (I think Luke is a great one to start with), really paints a picture of who Jesus is, and reveals the heart of God for each of us. The more you get to know Him, and see His great love for you, the more you will want to love Him in return.  He loved each one of us so much, that He'd rather DIE than live without us!  Amazing!!!  If you were the only one on earth, He would have died just for you, He loves you SO MUCH!  If you have trouble knowing where to start in your Bible reading, or want some help, there are many bible study tools and devotionals available that may assist you in your personal bible reading.  A Pastor could help you with selecting something that would be helpful.   

2.  prayer - talking and listening to God.  I think a marriage relationship helps to understand this, or a relationship with a best friend.  If we don't take time to communicate on a regular basis, our relationship would soon deteriorate vs. being sustained, and growing deeper.  Prayer is just like talking to your best friend.  I talk to God alot throughout the day.  As concerns cross my mind, I'll just say a little prayer, "help me with my anxiety today, Lord.  I'm worried about how my reconstruction is going to go", "help my son Sam today get along with one of his friends he's struggling with"....etc.  It's comforting to know that He is always there, ready to give me His strength and peace. Having a regular time set apart each day is also helpful.  It's kind've like your daily "date" with God!

 I've found journaling to be helpful in in "listening" to God. I use a simple spiral notebook...nothing fancy.  Journalling helps me to stay focused and to "hear better".  Journaling is not like a diary,( i.e. "this is what I did today" kind've "log"), but more of writing out my deepest feelings to God, my deepest questions, and then quieting myself to listen.  You'll be surprised at the thoughts that come to your mind, that you'll know weren't your own.  I write these thoughts (i.e. what I believe God is saying to me) down.  Again, writing them down helps me to really focus and attend to what I believe God is trying to say to me....The easiest way to tell if you are hearing from God, is if the thoughts are in line with Scripture, and if they inspire faith and peace.  (anything that is condemning, or confusing is not from God - there are 3 sources for our thoughts: God, ourselves, or the devil - That's why we must "test our thoughts" to be sure we're hearing from God.)  The best way to learn to hear from God, is to be reading the Bible on a consistent basis. Romans 12:2 says to "not be conformed to the pattern of the world" but to be "transformed by the renewing of our minds... then we will be able to test and approve of what God's will is".  Reading the Word consistently helps get rid of what I like to call "stinking thinking" -- negative thoughts or misbeliefs that may have been patterned in our upbringing, or by society, or just our own sinful nature - thoughts that are contrary to God's Word and His character.  When you read the Bible consistently, you begin to know the "heart" of God, and know His communication style, to know His truth, and can begin to discern more readily those thoughts that are in line with His nature and His Word.  The bible says, Jesus is the Good Sheperd, "He calls his own sheep (that's us!) by name... and they follow Him, because they know His voice."  I've been AMAZED at how God confirms what He's spoken to me....either by comments from a friend that are almost exactly what He's said in my quiet time with Him, or something I've heard in a sermon that is very similar, or the lyrics of a song that again speak the same message.  You name it.  God gets very creative at helping us grow in our confidence that we hear Him.  I often go back in my journal, and write these "confirmations" down.  My past journals end up being quite a record of God's faithfulness, and often serve to encourage me at other times when I need to "look back" and see how God has worked and been faithful to me in the past.

God says in His Word that  "anyone who comes to God, must believe that He exists, and that He rewards those who diligently seek Him."   He will reward your efforts to draw close to Him.  In fact, He's waiting eagerly!!!  He desires that closeness with you.  The problem is often on our end.  We don't make a concerted effort to spend time with him, reading His Word, or in prayer..

3.  Stay in regular fellowship with other believers.  Just like you're doing in this discussion board.  But it's also important to attend church regularly, learn from the sermons, and pursue relationships with other christians who you can know, and be known by.  It's helpful if you can become a part of some small group, where people can share transparently, and help eachother grow, by learning from eachother's experiences.

Hope that provides some practical help.

 Held, I know God is pleased with you.. with your transparency and honesty....your vulnerability, and your courage to start this thread.

God is never threatened by our questions.  He's there to answer them.  "If any of you lacks wisdom, let Him ask of God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given him. " James 1:5.   

I know I've "written a book" in this post, but as I mentioned before, If this post helps even one person, I will know I've done my job.

Closing point:  We can trust God.  We can trust His teaching ability more than our learning ability.  God is an awesome teacher -- He will use whatever creative means He needs, to help us get to know Him better.  If our hearts are truly set on knowing Him more deeply, we can be assured that He will make Himself known to us (and delights in doing so!).  The Bible promises, "draw near to God, and He WILL draw near to you." 

 Pursuing an intimate walk with God is worth every ounce of energy you put into it.  He's constantly wooing our hearts and waiting.... the rewards are deep and far reaching.  Remember to keep your eyes open to His constant invitations to know Him more-- be expectant!

God bless you all,

Sue