Anyone starting chemo in Aug. 08?

Three days until chemo starts. I hope I'm ready. I am supposed to get dose-dense ACT, but don't know how much my recent dx of IBC is going to change the game plan. This inflamed, cancerous breast is painful and looks really deformed. I'm praying that the chemo will start shrinking it. It is so large, with the tumor protruding from the skin, that I amy actually be able to see it decrease in size. That is what I am trying to focus on, instead of how bad the SE will be. Tomorrow I am going to shop for the stuff on the chemo list.

Bette 

Good evenings ladies,

I had my first FEC tx on Tues & Wed. very few SE, but I don't think I'm being carefull enough.  I've just gone about my life as normal because I'm feeling OK.  I've been washing my hands all the time but not really staying away from crowds etc.  I think I'm going to be much more carefull this week.  I'm so sorry that some of you are having so much pain. I'm really going to be praying for you.  The food obsession is what's got me.  OMG.....I'm eating like a horse.  If I don't slow down it's going to get really bad.......I don't even want to think about the scales.  I ate my bosses half of sandwich last week at a meeting.......holy cow....

stacy,  we miss you!!

 Have a great evening ladies.....peaches

Hi, all ~  Hope everyone has had a nice weekend without too many SE's.  Personally, I am having a harder time dealing with the hair loss than I'd expected.  I'm sure I'll get used to it, but today it was just kind of a downer I hadn't anticipated.

It was disappointing to learn that this board isn't as private and safe as I think we'd all assumed it was.  I guess we just have to be careful about what we choose to share here. 

Stacy - You and I started our chemo on the same day, 8/6, as did Hood, I think, and maybe Tonya, who I think is dense dose, so no longer on our same schedule.  (Forgive me if I'm overlooking anyone else who started on 8/6, but we need a chart or something.)  Anyway, Stacy, I hope you won't really leave because, not only will I miss your wonderful sense of humor and warmth, but I will miss having you as a chemo sister who is on the same schedule.  And if you're not here, especially because we are on the same schedule, I will continue to think about you and wonder how you're doing. 

Jeannine -  I never seem to get to the Whittier area (I'm out near Palm Desert), but knowing you're there, it would be fun to try to get together one of these days. 

Thinking of you all ~  Deanna

Hi all - well shaved my head this morning before I took my 13 year old daughter to school - threw my wig on and away I went.  Feels weird here at work but everyone tells me how good it looks - oh well if not I am stuck with it for awhile!!!!!!  Stacy I haven't posted since all that took place but NOTHING I HAVE EVER READ FROM ANYONE has offended me.  I am glad you came back.  I go in on Friday for my 2nd TX treatment and I guess I am ready - I only have to do 4 so I keep telling myself - after Friday 1/2 way done!!!! YIPPPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!  Hope everyone is feeling good or as good as can be expected.  Lashon2008 - I feel for your situation - I am working thru chemo and if my doctor would have told me I couldn't my hubby and I would have been hurting - BADLY.  We too have a house payment and 2 car payments - I got my car 10 days before I was dx so if I could ONLY go back - I love it but I wouldn't have gotten it!!! Hang in there - we are all here for you!!!!!  Loves to all!!!!!!!!!!

Hi Girls,

See-time is going fast now with some girls starting #2 already.  Stacy, Alibug, and Maria-good luck with #2!  I feel okay after mine last week.  Maria, glad you are doing well-hadn't seen a post from you for a while. 

Some tiredness today-could barely do my walk.  Still some taste changes and feeling less hungry.  I bought some Carnation instant breakfast-just sounded good as I was walking by it.  I haven't gone to the bathroom in 3 days-not feeling bad from it, but I will take something "mild" tonight to help it out.  Didn't have any problems with this during TX1.  Oh, well...

Kids came back to school today-felt good to be back in the normal routine.  Had a bad night last night because a couple of people went to my good friend at work and asked if everything was okay with me (guess the wig didn't fool everyone).  She told them yes-I just want to go to work and not have everyone look at me differently-that's why I want to keep quiet there. 

Roya, sorry about the hair-I still have some hanging on after TX2, enough to cover and stick out of a cap, but I think my time is running out, too.  So sad to know it's going for a while.

Lashon-hope you are doing well-it sounds like you are having a rough time, but hopefully, things will turn soon!!

~Misty

Stacy-

Hey everyone

Lashon - I can relate to your post.  I am not allowed to work per my onc dr either.  It's boring even when I don't feel good.  I had my first chemo last tuesday and my white count is already way down according to the dr today, plus I have thrush.   I will be having six treatments alltogether ending sometime in December so I'll be counting down with you.   We will all kick cancer's butt together - I'm so glad to have found this site,

tired - so goodnight ladies - everyone rest well tonight and feel better tomorrow!

Monique

Hi everyone... I'm a long time lurker and a first time poster.  I am 30 years old and scheduled to start my first round of TC chemo on Thursday 8/28. 

Although I had my lumpectomy back in June, it has taken me almost two months to get my head around actually doing chemo.  Although I am a generally positive person, I am REALLY struggling with the idea of pumping what is essentially poison into my veins.  I know it kills both the good and bad cells, but I just feel so fundamentally opposed to going through with it.  I feel so normal and otherwise healthy; it's next to impossible for me to really believe that I could still have some microscopic rogue cancer cells drifting through my body.  My nodes were clear, my margins were clear, but I had (have?) an aggressive form of triple negative breast cancer.  The ONLY thing that convinced me to do it is that my onco told me that if I didn't I'd have a 1 in 3 chance of recurring metastic breast cancer and would likely have to deal with it for the rest of my life.

 I am a huge planner and the unknown following chemo absolutely terrifies me.  I understand that everyone's side effects differ, but I have to admit that just reading through what some of you have gone through has brought me close to tears. 

 Any suggestions for calming down and changing my attitude?  I'm worried that I might wake up on Thursday and not be able to bring myself to my first "poisoning" session. 

Nico

Hi and welcome rosemary ap,

You're correct, it is a difficult concept to get past...pumping ourselves with "chemicals" in order to get well.  My strongest influence has been my family.  My grandmother and mom are both breast cancer surviviors and did everything they were told by the doctors.  Back in my grandmother's day, the treatments were very different from what they are today, but she did everything she could to live. 

My sister-in-law (DH's sister) passed away two years ago from breast cancer at the age of 43yrs.  She was such a free spirit...open in her thinking and actions...terrified of chemo and radiation, so she did neither.  She went the holistic route.  Now that I have breast cancer I feel like I can understand her actions so much more.  The entire family was very judgemental in their thinking when she was terminal...that she should have sought treatment and didn't....outside of the holistic route and lumpectomy.  I still would never judge her decision.  She asked for chemo during the last month of her life, but it was too late.  Her breast cancer was aggressive, but totally treatable from a medical standpoint.  She lived far from all of us and was very quiet about what was happening to her at the time.  None of us realized until it was too late how very sick she was.  I wish we could have been there for her to help her feel strong enough and less afraid.  To help her fight.

I know we are all so afraid.  I know I am.  I believe we need to do everything we can to save ourselves from this horrible disease.  I have had one round of chemo and at night I imagine it is attacking the cancer and killing it.  I need to be here to raise my kids and live life. 

Know that we are all here to support you and help raise you up. 

I hope this post isn't depressing.  It's not meant to be.  I just know my sister-in-law felt so alone when she needed help the most.  I hope no-one ever has to feel that way when dealing with such a serious illness.  We can and do support eachother.  You can do this.  You can do this.

Hugs.

Dawn

Roya,

I bought the sugar-free vanilla instant breakfast-I had one mid-morning at work today.  I mixed it with lowfat milk-went down much easier than water.  I feel this is one way to get some nutrition into my body when other foods are just not cutting it!!  Try it and let me know what you think.  I'll probably do one again tomorrow morning until I get over the first week after...

~Misty

Good afternoon ladies,

Lashon, great to see you back....you have been in my prayers specifically.  I hope that as the days go by you will see more and more blessings that can come from this journey.

Stacy, so good to hear from you.  I loved the picture!  I know my hair day is coming in about 8 days.  I'm glad that you are feeling good.  I know what you mean about people at work.  I really wish that they wouldn't look at me like I'm about to fall out.  I know that they just don't understand , I didn't either a few months ago. 

Well, I have had one side effect that I've noticed.  Chemo took my patience.  I have very little patience with stupid questions and procrastions from co workers.  I have no idea why....maybe I better double up on the Lexipro.

It's great to hear about so many of you already done with #2 Way to Go!! 

Rosemary, Welcome to the group....I know the thought of chemo is hard but I guess I'm just thankful that God has provided a way to lessen the % of it coming back.  I don't know what kind of tx your on but my first tx (FEC) was not bad at all.  I"ve known so many people that have gone through it with very few SE.  I'll be praying for you!

Talk more tomorrow...peaches

Hi Rosemary,

I am glad you found us on this topic.  I wrote to you on the other thread you had started.  I felt the same way as you before I got started.  Now that I am in the middle, I feel a little different.  I just want to get this over with, kill any possible bad cells, and move on with life.  Once you get over the hurdle of TX#1, you will probably change your feelings.  Everyone on this thread is great, and we are all getting through this together.

~Misty