Anyone Starting Chemo in June 2016

Elocea

You guys are so lovely and supportive. I teared up and told my husband how sweet you were all being. Thank you

labscientistmom - Thank you for your prayers. Saving eggs was not an option for me for a few reasons. My oncologist said that because I had estrogen positive cancer I couldn't take any fertility drugs (without high risk of encouraging my cancer) in order to produce the eggs needed for harvesting. Also, they did not want to delay my treatment. THEN there is the huge cost as well (but we would have sorted out had the other factors not been there). What a blessing that you were able to have your son! I really have to keep faith that what's meant to happen, will happen for my husband and I. And yes, SO glad about my BRCA results for (hopefully) future generations and my brother's children. I hope you get the authorization for your testing. Also, love all your pics! Now you have different looks you can rock! I rotate my wigs, hats, scarves around to keep everyone guessing.

Dollydimples - I'm actually just turned 34 now. After my chemo I will have Herceptin for a year, then will get a 'break' from everything for awhile. That's when we are going to be a given a window of time from the oncologist to try to conceive. I'm not sure how long this will be but afterwards she wants me on Tamoxifen for many years. She wanted to put me on it right away after Herceptin but saw how important it was for us to try to have a child. Plus if we do 5 years of it THEN try to conceive I'll be almost 40 and have much less chance due to age, the drugs, etc. I explained just above about why saving my eggs was not an option. I went through a month of mourning after I was first diagnosed because I felt like I was given a one-two punch. First cancer, then slim fertility hopes. I'm doing everything I possibly can to stay healthy during my treatment and just keep praying!

bbbb - Thank you for your prayers as well. I try to have faith and not dwell on things that are out of my control. Easier said than done!

KNardo - I'm glad you were able to freeze embryos! There must be some comfort in that, even though I'm sure it's not how either you or hubby thought things would go! I'm sorry they are at risk for the gene, that is certainly another factor you didn't want to add into this process. I'll be praying for you to have healthy babies and lots of happiness!

Heathet - Thanks for your kind wishes! I'm hoping my age does work to my advantage and my body keeps on producing healthy eggs after all this is done. If not, there are many ways my husband and I can explore to still be parents. That will be the next chapter after I'm done kicking cancer's butt!

Pepper - Hope you're feeling better tomorrow with more energy. Just listen to your body though and don't feel guilty about the naps! I let myself have snoozy days and then take advantage of my higher energy days to do errands or socializing.

Time for bed myself here in Canada. Thanks again for all the love and support!

labscientistmom

Heathet: My calico cat Sophia is the one who has always liked to rub in my hair and chew on it. She hasn't discovered that its short yet.

Pepper: glad you took naps, Hope you feel better tomorrow. Thank you for your kind words, the short hair is shocking, but more comfy than shedding and cooler under a scarf or bandana. I still think YOU rocked it better, but I dig the biker chick look. With some middle eastern princess thrown in according to my husband. My son says, "I don't have to treat you like a princess, cause you are my Mom. "

bbbb: I think the color worked too, but you should have seen my son's face, he was appalled, what had I done to my hair??

Suz: lets see your haircut picture too girl! Everyone is rocking it!! Biker chicks unite!

Dolly: I love the wee cottage, it is beautiful! I have two cats and they are more affectionate than usual lately, I am home much more, so there is a difference. I think once Sophia gets behind me on the couch and notices my shorter hair it will be interesting. The other cat has been looking at me a little funny today, maybe he's trying to figure out what's different.

STrangly, as grumpy as i was yesterday about having to cut my hair, now that it's done, I am feeling better about it. Being able to wear a scarf all day and be comfortable and have it stay on, was good. I can pull this off. We are going to church in our biker bandanas tomorrow. (but my son won't wear one! ) Blessings to all, A

labscientistmom

Elocea: God is good, all the time, and He specializes in making beautiful things out of shattered, broken pieces in this crazy, broken world. Trust in His love for you, and the good plans He has for you, and know you are held in His hand. I didn't see your post before I wrote the last one, so I didn't want to leave you out. I agree, all of us are supporting each other in a wonderful, blessed way, cause we are soldier sisters fighting our battle. Its a bummer we have to be here, but better together than alone.

Sleep well, I am headed for bed soon too, more tomorrow, A

Anonymous

Heathet, yes...yes...yes....that is one down and only 5 teeny wee ones to go!!! The first one is always the absolute worst one and I am a seasoned veteran now coz I have had TWO...haha My symptoms have almost been non-existent this time. So maybe your symptoms will get less second time around too. I do hope so. I think it is good to spend the first day lazing around and not doing much like you are doing. It is really ALL we can do. I also feel tired for first threeish days but I think it is also the stress of the whole day at hospital that exhausts you too. So rest tomorrow too and then gradually work way up to things. I can imagine your cat sitting on your head. Last year my sister's cat used to spend half it's life sitting on my ex's head. He also had a shaved head. The cat just loved sitting there. I wonder why? In the end one of the two of them had to go, so we kept the cat.....naturally!!!

Suz, How is your treatment going? Are you coping OK? It is very daunting this whole breast thing, but it is also something that has had so much money ploughed into it and the treatments are so good and effective. What sort of cancer is it that your relative has?

KNardo88

Today's day 3 since chemo #1... So far, just small waves of nausea that I'm not even fully convinced are actual nausea, or more my anxiety giving me tummy troubles. Either way, I've been taking my anti nausea meds at ANY sign of discomfort, because to me, nausea and vomiting is just the worst! Beyond that, I've been quite tired. Several naps a day, very low energy otheriwse, and very low appetite. Trying hard to get food in, and water, too. I know that is important! I am also finding myself to be very emotional... Not sure if that's due to my hormones going crazy as I started my period the day of my chemo or what!

My brother in law's bachelor party was yesterday, which I insisted my husband attend. My mom came up to stay with me so he could go without worrying. Even still, he reluctantly agreed to go, but I'm glad he didn't miss it because of me! Today happens to be my mom's 61st birthday, too, and here she is taking care of me. I feel bad, but she really is an amazing mom, and an amazing woman all around!

Just felt like updating :-) hope everyone is doing great! Love all the new pics!!!!!!

Anonymous

KNardo, you sound like you are doing pretty well. I get what you are saying about emotional and it is most likely a release of a whole lot of pent up anxiety, fear, exhaustion and worry. You see you are NOW on the track to cure and perfect health and I think our bodies are now 'coming down' from all that stress and Adrenalin. When that happens you get tearful! I had this explained to me on a school CPD years ago to do with behaviour and how kids react after they have had a fight or behaved very badly. It is the same process....Adrenalin reduces as we calm down and that makes us tearful and emotional.

I also think that your mum is happy to be with you, no matter what. I speak from experience and cannot get rid of mine, although she has gone out today to see my sister and do some shopping!!! But your mum is only happy as long as her wee girl is OK. Take time to chat with her and reassure her that you are going to be absolutely OK and fine. I worry about the worry my mum must be going through too over this. But I find, if I am happier and doing well she is really happy. So you are doing very well and this will be lovely for mum to see.

I hope your husband enjoyed his party night out. Lucky devil. I so long to be able to go out to dinner in Edinburgh and meet friends and have a giggle. Ahhhhh and to wear a pretty dress and fluff all my thick hair out. Haha...I am petrified to even touch hair these days!

Keep doing great. And I am not sure if this will be case for you, but my second infusion was even easier than first. I had heard of this being a possibility, but never thought it would be. So go with that in your mind for next time!

Dolly

Heathet

KNardo88 - today is day 3 for me too. I exercised a little bit - very low key on the stationary bike. I'm just tired and my stomach feels hot so I'm talking Pepcid. I'm pretty thristy but I don't really have an appetite. I hoping to get some nap time in and maybe feel a little better. Just an over all feeling of being weak . My husband wants to take the boat out for a quick spin so I'll think my friend will come over and keep me company . Enjoy your mom's birthday !

Dolly - I keep thinking 5 to go! It's the mantra repeating over in my head! I just want my chemo warriors to go in and take care of those cancer stranglers! A posivitve attitude makes this journey more bearable - knowing there's a light at the end of the tunnel! It is funny that my cat has some strange new fascination with my head! I have to watch him at night when I'm sleeping or he'll sneak up and start licking my head! I love the picture of your cottage - it looks very peaceful!

lilyp6

Good Morning Everyone,

This thread has been such a source of comfort to me in the early morning and late night. I don't know what on earth has kept me from posting, except, tests, scans, cooking, touching base with everyone I know, working, and exhaustion! I was thrilled to start chemo on 6/7, and aside from some minor bumps in the road, it's going well. Who looks like this their first time in a chemo chair? Lots of the fierce ladies in this group, I would imagine. It was four days after I saw my oncologist for the first time and I was so relieved that I was practically giddy. I'm going to figure out hour to post my profile pic and catch up with the recent messages soon.

Llroseworld

Tummy pain for a solid 5 days after chemo has finally subsided. I feel like a human again and it is SO SWEET!!!!! 2nd chemo is on Thursday and I am going to see what we can do to avoid the tummy pain happening again.

Anonymous

Heathet and all other ladies.....WE are all getting there!!!! Yeeehaaaaaaa.....we are winning!

Dolly

Anonymous

bbbb,

I will be thinking about you tomorrow. You do NOT even think anything other than THIS IS GOING TO BE OK! Nurses are fab and you have us here! Yes, I am liking this POSITIVE vibe we all have going on here at the moment. I am well and so are the rest of us. We had those cancer stragglers cut out from us!!! Now chemo is just to check any wee horrors that might have thought they could outsmart the docs, well that chemo is SHOWING them as we speak. If we are feeling unwell ladies, that is good as it means the chemo is working! I need to keep telling myself that every time I feel a wee bit unwell or tired. Even our beautiful hair....it may be going, but that's coz Mrs Chemo is doing her job. We are all on the right path...we are all moving in that good direction.

Dolly!!

Anonymous

This is my new bracelet. Amazon £2... Wear it every single day

boobsBgone

I started chemo 6/13/16 - and did great that day and the next before my body decided I did not want the drugs and I did get most of the yucky symptoms. I did go back a couple days later for some extra IV fluids and meds which totally helped. I seem to have one not so good day for every couple of good days. My next chemo tx is on 7/6 - at least after July 4th weekend! I am making sure I take my meds as needed to ensure I do not get sick. Though I am tired all time, some days more so than others.

i listen very carefully to the oncologist and NP to make sure I follow their guidelines. Once chemo is done (eventually) then I go for surgery BMX, then radiation. So, like most of you, our journey is still young.

I appreciate how everyone shares, and i agree is does help to know you are not alone. One suggestion, I have a great aesthetician who also does healing energy, it seems to help me stay centered. I am not one for massages since I have a trust issue, but I have been with her for 11 years now and she helps me relax. so always do something for yourself because you deserve it and need it to keep up your strength and your spirit. find something you love and do it (as long as the dr says it is okay); no matter what others say. (I got a funny look from a family member about my facial/healing touch which i plan to do after every chemo treatment - it is not about them, it is about me and I deserve it).

Good luck in your journey and glad we are all here to help each other smile today!

Anonymous

Lily... Welcome to the gang!! It is sad you are here but we are all doing well and so WILL you! You look great in that chair! that is because that pic shows the start of your healing!

boobsBgone

Lily - when I did my first chemo tx, I was dressed as comfortable as possible and brought a duffle-bag full of treats, food, blankets, books, tablet, coloring book/pencils and slippers. I do not care how ridiculous i looked, i was cozy and comfortable. I plan to do the same for my second tx in another week. You are stuck in that chair for a few hours, you may as well have as many comforts from home as possible. you go girl!

ClarkBlue

Heathet I found that I needed to take something for the heartburn as well. I ended up taking Prilosec beginning on day 1 to around day 5.

Does anyone on TC find that they have extremely restless sleep from day 3-5? We are talking very strange dreams, waking up every few hours, Etc. the steroids have ended by that point so I don't think it's that...I can't concentrate on ANYTHING on those days. No TV, can't focus on a book, Facebook, or a conversation. I find myself just agonizingly waiting for the hours to pass...

Am thinking I will ask my MO for Adderall or something to keep my thoughts focused so I can at least pass the time enjoyably?? I'm thinking an ADD medication may help during those days. Also thought maybe marijuana may help too? I just need to be able to pass the time until I feel better...

Also, what is the supplement you are all taking to ward off neuropathy again? I want to ask her about it as well.

Thanks everyone!

-Keely

Moondust

So, I washed my hair for the first time in three days. The hair loss filled up the hair catcher three times and a bit more! But after the blow dry I decided it still looks respectable enough except for the top, which is doing The Parting of the Red Sea act. For now I'll wear a ball cap in public until my scalp starts showing on the sides, or my bangs get too sparse. I'll be ordering the fake bangs and some other head coverings today, to supplement my wigs and different hats that my generous cousin sent me. I won't say anything to her, but some of the scarves she sent make me look of a religious persuasion that is not too popular at the moment.

WUnderlust

Hello everyone, my 1st post and another June starter here.

Thank you for the positive attitude, comments and support here. We can all get through this!

Started chemo on 6/8, developed unusually delayed allergic reaction to TC after 2 weeks so my MO switched me to Abraxane this week. So far, the side-effects have been minor and manageable though my once voluminous hair is 40% out. Time for wig/hat shopping.

Keely - I'm sorry about your restless sleep. I had to take lorazepam once for insomnia but am trying to stay away since it leaves me super drowsy next morning.
For neuroprathy, NP recommended taking Glutamine 15gm 2xdaily or 10gm 3xdaily 1 full day after chemo for 4 days, supplment diet with folic acid 1mg daily, and vitamin B-6 100mg daily. Hope this is helpful.

-Angel

Anonymous

Moondust, I think your hair is doing really well as you are at a similar stage as me in terms of chemo and yet I have similar sort of parting and I am using the freakin cold cap!!!

How many chemo days have you had now in total? I am on day 24 since first ever infusion. Hair is a problem. I am getting fed up with silly hairs falling in my cup of tea etc. I can totally see why people just shave it. It is a nuisance.

Hope you are feeling good?

Dolly

lilyp6

Dolly, Thanks! I've been explaining to everyone how chemo for me is nothing like the chemo in their imaginations. It's like they're saving my life in slow-motion, which is fine - bring it on. I have not had surgery yet. I think that would be tougher.

Boobsbgone, my goodness, love that name. Absolutely, I looked up 'what to bring to chemo,' showed up in my pj's, hydrated, with my blanket, phone, tablet, snacks, and books. There was a personal tv, the nurse was incredibly kind and attentive, and the chair itself reclines, has heat and massage. I am as happy as it's possible to be there. My husband takes me, and I had a friend visit once, but I want to be able to do it by myself.

It's not been all roses, but if it helps anyone starting, here's what I've been doing for a month...

May 25: referral for a mammo and ultrasound for a large lump in my right breast. Had a biopsy, tumor marker, a second mammo that day. Was still hoping for a cyst until the biopsy. So far the pressure on the wound from the biopsy was the most painful during and afterward. Two days later the radiologist made a special phone call to me so I wouldn't suffer over the Memorial Day weekend, wondering - he confirmed what he told me he suspected during the appointment. I would have waited an extra four days had he not. I registered on this web site before he called me, and read as much as I could.

Week of June 3: So many appointments and tests. Met with the oncologist and surgeon, and did not feel relief until that Fri, when the surgeon went over the treatment plan and let us know that she was hopeful that I will be another lucky survivor. These were the darkest weeks. I got an Ativan prescription, and started taking it once per night to sleep.

Week of June 10: The first week of treatment. SO many pills! I had the orientation, and began to get Taxol and Carboplatin, weekly, on Tuesdays, (sometimes both, sometimes one). Tried to work a full day on Thurs. Now I see that the steriods, which keep me humming along, wore off on that day.

I was not nauseous, nor did I believe I would get constipated, though I was having cramps. I ended up sort of belching up the contents of my throat onto my desk that day, (I was alone, thank goodness. There was little warning). I went immediately to buy the laxative, and made myself eat an actual meal, because I could tell that I was hungry. Once I got into the swing of eating, taking the nausea meds and laxative, it was night and day. Don't be like me, learning things the hard way!

I had the extreme fatigue that I still get, but was feeling much better by that Sat. That was another huge relief. My appetite is still good, as it is today. Had a breast MRI outside of my main treatment center - weird, but I'm not claustrophobic, so also similar to a massage table situation, and I just spaced out and relaxed. My husband gave me a "boy" haircut and I indulged myself with wigs and hairpieces.

Week of June 18: Did great having an idea of how it would go. Worked more hours, and thought by Thurs, would have heard if there was any concern with the breast MRI. Got home exhausted on that day to a form letter from the center that tested me about "areas of concern," etc, recommended a biopsy...it was mystifying and I couldn't reach anyone there. Spoke to my "coordinating nurse" late, after hours and she was kind enough to read me the report and assure me that if there really was cancer elsewhere, we were knocking it out.

This entire time, I was telling folks in waves. On the one hand, people are so lovely, and it brings out the best in so many. On the other hand, it's draining for me. A lot of times I am comforting them. To this day, I am holding up better than my husband is, but I've had a lot longer to come to terms with these bodily indignities and fears. We celebrated Father's Day on both days of the weekend.

This week: Third treatment, I went in with anemia, and we expected a hard week as we were told during orientation. Got my period on my chemo side effect day, and struggled with weakness and fatigue. Ate a Moroccan LIVER dish (I hate liver! But this was good) as well as everything else I could find to help with iron. I didn't bounce back as fast this week, but I'm not surprised. Thankfully, nothing to do but regular chores and food prep this week.

Question: Does anyone on Taxol and Carbo know how the rhythm of the treatment might go from their experience? I have 9 more weeks of this, and then 12 of A/C. Have you been bouncing back?

Please excuse the endless post...Best thing this week: My neighbor has a dog that looks a lot like mine. With her blessing, we made a path through our fences so they have more room to run. They make us laugh.

KNardo88

Whew. Hubby returned from his trip, so mom just left to head home... And I've been nothing but a blubbering mess of waterworks since about noon today. Not able to give any explanation for it, just hoping it goes away. I don't like being so sad! It just comes up on me so quickly and without warning. Wondering if this is an actual side effect, or if I just need to stay extra strong and get some extra hugs or what

Moondust

Welcome, Angel! When you get a sec, please fill out your profile and make it Public so we will be reminded of your DX and what chemo you are receiving. I will order some glutamine pronto!

Dolly, your cottage is so charming! I love the flowers and the outside of it. But what really strikes me is how vibrant the colors are where you live, and how blue the sky! In central California the sky is somewhere between gray and faint blue. We get so much pollution and dust! When I go up to high elevation in the mountains then I finally see the true blue of the sky and can see the stars. I loved the video with the Hold On song, too. I started chemo June 8 and will have another this coming Wednesday.

boobsBgone, thanks for your comments. Doing what we feel like doing and what we are capable of doing is probably the source of our greatest strength right now. If you could do your profile it would help my poor memory!

Heathet, way to go for getting on the exercise bike! I find that normal low-key activities are no problem, but anything strenuous like biking or hiking up a hill is about three times harder now.

Keely, I'm sorry you are feeling too spaced out to do anything. That must be weird. Maybe listen to some favorite music and move around a little. I take comfort in doing my daily cleaning and cooking when I'm not feeling so well.

Lily, you look upbeat and positive in your chemo chair. Good luck!

LabMom Angela, you are looking better and better in those photos! I'm glad you are hanging in there!

Knardo, I will try an anti-nausea pill this time around, to see if it helps my "I swallowed a big rock" feeling in my stomach.

Elocea, hooray for no bad mutations! It's great that you will be able to try for a pregnancy before going on the tamoxifen. I have read that tamoxifen has less value for PR- tumors anyway. The Herceptin will be the greatest weapon against your tumor. I started trying for a pregnancy around your age (without any complications of cancer), and it took a couple of years and two early miscarriages before I had my son who is now 22. My obgyn finally put me on progesterone suppositories and that did the trick for preventing miscarriage.

Here is my new baseball cap look (also in my avatar).

labscientistmom

Moondust: the cap looks amazing. My husband and I sported the biker chick/dude look at church today, to the delight of all. There was a LOT of scalp showing through the top curve of my head, so i figured if I need to cover it for no sunburn, I might as well have as little as possible under the hat.

KNardo88: some days I am much more emotional and cranky than others. It doesn't help to have headaches and muscle tension. Hang in there, give your self lots of grace! Maybe text a friend, ask for prayers and let em know you arn't feeling so brave. When I do this it really helps to get the encouragement. Most people can remember a time when they felt the same way. (Not from cancer, but everyone got stuff.) and you can always come here for your encouragement too. You are stronger than you think you are.

lilyp6: Love the laughing dog picture! glad you are making progress in your cancer fight. It helps to have a plan, and to be implementing it. Sorry you have to be here, but we are glad you are hanging with us. We are fighters, we are gonna kick cancer's butt, kill all the little mutants so they NEVER come back!!

bbgone in Vegas: welcome to you too!

Clarkblue and Heathet: you might try aloe vera juice for heartburn. It's not tasty at all, but you only need a couple swallows and it does seem to help.

Dolly: Hi there, hope you are still doing ok. I like your bracelet! It's good to have reminders of the goal!!

WUnderlust

Thanks Moondust for the reminder, updated the setting. Love your new avatar and looking great with the cap!

Dolly - Same hair problem for me as well, I'm tired of finding hair all over the place, in the car, in my food and in your coffee. Debating if I should shave it now or wait til it thins out more.

Lily - Thanks for sharing your experience. Did the liver dish boost your count? I'm slightly anemic so have been trying to consume more dark chocolate to boost iron but maybe I should add liver to my diet as well..

Knardo - Going through treatment takes alot of strength and courage, its ok to let down your emotional guards sometimes though extra hugs and kisses can't hurt Hang in there!

NattyB

Hi all - I've been kind of sporadic on here lately. Going back to work tomorrow and am a tad freaked out about it. Knardo and Elocea (I think) you were talking about the period stuff?.. Well, gotta tell you, my first one on TH came the day before I had chemo#2 and I had PMS and the roughest time with my emotions for the full 7 days, like WTH? I think like (maybe Dolly) said, part of it was the flat out emotional stuff but the other part was definitely hormonal for me - cramping, the works. I was teary for no reason, all of that mess. It is just about gone but it hung on for a good 10 days or so from when I started. I even felt like I had boob tenderness which I shouldn't have since they are gone, silicone sympathy pains?..dunno. Give yourself a break and rise it out. I got kind of paranoid too since I am 100%ER and PR that it was like this hormone mutiny going on in my body since I started chemo. I'm hoping it's my last period on chemo but mother nature and I haven't been getting along so we'll see. I'll be doing tamoxifen too after Taxol - fun times. On the tummy stuff - Prilosec every am helps a tad but the D is unpredictable so I'm not really taking anything for that since I don't want to rebound the other way. Learning to eat a yogurt every am (hot wings are not a good choice for breakfast, trust me on that one).

I hate to miss anyone's names so I hesitate to mention everyone but welcome welcome to the new sisters and thank you thank you to those of you who have been so diligent in sharing. I'll try and post a pic one of these days when I'm trying to pretend like I'm working at work:) My hair is still hanging on but I feel a bit like it's the one thing friends and family are staring at - like a tornado warning. I cut about 7" off before my surgery and went lighter since the wigs I looked at didn't quite match what I had going on. I can only hope I look as cute and sexy as you all do with your short cuts and buzz cuts - we have some rounds heads in my family and I'm thinking I will be more Charlie Brown and not GI Jane:)

Oh - the neuropathy stuff I'm taking/doing are B6, B12 (daily) and my onc recommended Alpha lipoic acid along with the icing. I haven't started the alpha yet but she was more of a proponent of it over the L Glutamine. Haven't had any symptoms of that yet but I'm buying both before this week's treatment. Hope you are all having a lovely weekend!

lilyp6

Elocea, So sorry to hear about the bad experience with your doctor. I'll send good wishes your way for your period to return to you. I take Ibuprofen for terrible cramps, and relied on Tylenol instead this time. I had to take about 7 on the worse day - not good for your liver! But I took less the next, and then none. I second Dolly's yoga advice!

Dolly, I think that's your cottage? Oh my, how absolutely beautiful.

Anonymous

Hey Ladies,

I am having discussion with my mum about hair. She says I should not touch it and just leave it to see what happens. I am thinking about going for a hairdressers appointment to maybe just a couple of inches off and tidy it up....or maybe just go very very short. I am not sure what to do as I am a cold capper and maybe should not defeat the purpose by cutting all my hair off.

But I am getting pretty fed up with the loose hairs all over the place. I am now just brushing it as I normally would. What comes out, was going to come out anyway right?

Moondust, I LOVE the new pic. You look very healthy and huge big blue eyes. Love the hat too. Gives you a very cheeky look to you. Like you are about to do something naughty haha

Knardo, listen to Labscientist...there is NOTHING wrong at all with feeling down every now and then. We all do it. I have been feeling slightly off over the last few days and slightly weepeir than usual. I always try to find something to do to take my mind of it all. I have been Facetiming my friends recently (on my new phone) and also skyping. I also have taken to watching comedy shows on TV. I love Frasier. He always cheers me up. Try something like this maybe? But do NOT stress your body with tears and anxiety....Imagine if you were still at the mammogram and diagnosis stage?? You have come so far already and you are every single day, getting closer to the pot of gold!

Dolly

pepper43

Still dealing with fatigue on this end and not liking it one little bit. A stroll around the block with our dog Pepper wore me out. I napped today. I am so not a napper. I'm happy that our littlest starts a MineCraft camp tomorrow- some normalcy and play for her in all this hot cancer mess is a welcome change of pace.

Elocea- Yay on BRCA1 and BRCA2 tests! I get tested July 6 - had a 23andme test done and uploaded into Promethease and that indicated no BRCA but the oncologist couldn't say for sure how reliable that is. I'm already leaning towards ovary removal to reduce risk of recurrence (keep in mind I'm a decade older than you and we already have 4 kids in our blended family) so I think it would only come in to play when deciding whether to do bilateral mastectomy in my case. My cousin, who is also 43, gave birth a few months ago. You're still way young and have plenty of time- and I am sending massive fertility vibes your way girl.

Dolly- My "baby faced scientist" (this is what I dubbed him after seeing his Match.com pic before we met), is on the case. I'll share whatever he gleans from his research and will definitely be putting Radical Remission on my Kindle list. I do, however, have to confess to have a little sliver of ice cream cake just to feel full in on celebration. Hope I don't get a Scottish finger waggle over that (my mom's ancestors hail from Scotland). I am enjoying the shaved head in private- in public, not so much. Stares and pitying looks make me want to either cry or scream. I'm looking forward to getting my wig tidied up at a salon and a cool cap to wear under it so I don't roast in the NC heat. BTW: I loved the pic of your cottage!!!!!!

bbbb- I tried coconut water once and wanted to barf! Let me know if you fare better. Given my recollection and my always slightly queasy tummy I'm too scared to make another dip into the coconut water pool. An older patient next to me at first chemo raved about mixing a Wendy's frosty with her protein shake mix. Made me smile!

revnet- Fatigue is still on the plate. No bone/joint pain (or at least just a little pittance every so often) so that's managing well. I just wish I wasn't yawning or wanting to sleep most of the day. Today's wins have been a short walk, folding a load of laundry and putting clean sheets on our bed. And helping our little one shower to get ready for summer camp tomorrow. ;-)

labscientist- I've been so ridiculously open with family & friends about my diagnosis, it's ridiculous. Biz not so much. I'm an online fitness coach who's kept it mum on my FB community page and with my email list. I YouTube frequently (which I hope doesn't sound so hopelessly lame for a 40+ year old woman) so I finally "let the cat out of the bag" there- and then shared it on my FB page and with my email list. Funny thing is nearly twice the people who normally open my emails opened this one. Guess the subject line "Spoiler Alert: I Have Cancer" is a real draw. Who would've thunk it????? Right before being diagnosed, I was working on creating an online course for small biz owners wanting to get their message out and build their tribe with YouTube. I'm going to keep trying through chemo to get it done. I had finished up the first module before being officially diagnosed.

lilypie- Hello gorgeous! Nice to see you active on the boards and hope to hear from you more! And I looooove the doggies!!!!!

boobsbgone- Best handle ever. Nice to meet you too!

ClarkBlue- definitely with you on strange dreams. Sleep has been fairly restful so far (knock on wood) but I have been waking up early each day. If you're having trouble falling to sleep, I highly recommend ASMR videos (that is if they make you relaxed). There are ton on YouTube and I swear by them for inducing sleep & reducing anxiety.

Moondust- I love your new profile pic with the baseball cap!

Knardo- Sending you extra virtual hugs for sadness today. This too shall pass. Emotions run high on this path. I cried after leaving Bruegger's this morning just because someone gave me a pitiful look.

NattyB- Good luck on getting back to work. My home biz means I can set breaks whenever (but def puts a damper on income). In my former pro life, I was an attorney and have often accepted contract assignments to (a) get out of the house and (b) earn some steady income (commissions based can be stressful). I was thinking about taking some of these, but I just can't see how I'd manage with SE and fatigue and appointment schedules. Kudos to you for going for it! Let us know how it goes.

Again, so glad I found this thread. Sending Sunday hugs to all of you.

labscientistmom

Hey Pepper, I bet you can rock the biker chick look too! I got my flaming bandana with dreads at sparklingearth.com. They have some plainer ones too. Also I got a pretty scarf-thing at chemobeanies.com and they come in lots of colors. for the heat, maybe a halo wig and a baseball cap? I give you permission to stick your tongue out at the pity people. I get what you are saying tho about wearing a wig just being easier to be a non-cancer person for a little while. Its exhausting to have to go there with everyone you meet. It was tough in the haircut place, trying to explain why I was cutting my hair so short. ( I agree with Dolly tho, was tired of it getting into everything. so chopity chop) Fooey on them , we are fighting cancer here!!! I find it tough to be polite and still say what I want to people, I am a soldier fighting a battle here, some love, people?

As an former attorney, can you do notary stuff to add to your income? And if you do a contract assignment, maybe talk with the client, explain about where you are and give more time than usual so you can maybe make it work. I am so thankful for disability, I can't imagine the additional stress of worrying about income. I have two more payperiods of Paid Time off left, and then I will only get 60% of what I was making, but we have some saved so hoping to make it work.

Your you tube bizness thing sounds awesome! Not lame at all, I am 40 plus too, don't have time to facebook or twitter or utube. this is honestly the first time on a discussion board, and the draw is we are all in this together. I feel like we need to take hold of what we CAN still do, and not give that up, pace ourselves, totally, but still keep hold of what we can. I do miss my job at the hospital lab, but my main job now is staying healthy and getting through this chemo/rads thing with no delays or debilitation.

You were talking with Clarkblue Re: strange dreams, I get those too. dreaming that I am not actually sleeping. Dreaming that there is someone in the room, which is freaky. Not liking that, but it seems to be worse when I take steroids and benedryl. I like the cooler head for sleeping and getting ready faster cause I don't have to do my hair.

Sorry everyone, feel like this was just nattering on, but....here we are, right?

labscientistmom

Hey Pepper, they have purple flames skullcap! Got mine in blue, but you like purple. I like the terrycloth sweatband in these - Here's the link: http://www.sparklingearth.com/details.asp?sku=203 N:203-8132