Anyone else out there on the younger side of diagnosis?

SkiChick86

BlueKoala, glad to hear your response has been good! I am in a similar boat - probably IIB/IIIA but we won't know for sure since I'm having neoadjuvant chemo starting on Tuesday). I'm hoping for a good chemo response.

ShannaM

skichic, I feel just like you do. I was dx at 31, and actually had to demand for a mammogram. My obgyn was sure that the lump was just a clogged milk duct from breast feeding my third child. I'm about half way finished with my treatment and am worried that I wont be around to watch my three very young children grow up. My oncologist seems to be optimistic and things that everything is going great. I guess it's just one of those things that you need to put in the back of your mind and try to move forward. Treatment is hard, the last thing I want to have is to do it all over again, or find out that I did everything for no reason. I met a girl that was going through treatment at the same time as me and she is on her second treatment because of a re-occurrence. It's in her bones now. Her first cancer was stage 1a, but she didn't do any surgery or radiation, just chemo the first time around. Maybe being agressive is the saving grace. I don't understand how things like this happen, but I'm hoping I can come out on the other side stronger and become someone that can help others dealing with such a life changing experience.

Hoping1975

I am 41 and was just diagnosed with stage 3B IDC and SITU also invasive. Had double mastectomy and needing aggressive chemotherapy and radiation.

SkiChick86

ShannaM - I'm sorry you're going through this too. The worry about not being around for my two year old son and my baby (currently in utero) is probably the worst part for me. I try not to think about it. I also do wonder if the fact that they caught it later is a blessing in disguise because it means more aggressive treatment. I first found my lump back in April when it was likely just DCIS (stage 0) and they didn't do a mammogram and told me it was just fibrocystic changes. I struggle with the fact that I didn't push for a mammogram or a biopsy because now I'm dealing with a much more advanced cancer and I'm being treated while pregnant. But, maybe the more intensive treatment I'm getting now is actually better in the long run. Who knows, but it helps me not feel so frustrated about my missed diagnosis back in April.

Lovemyfurbabies

Hi Skichick. I am twenty nine just recently diagnosed, had my second chemo treatment yesterday. I am doing six rounds of chemo before surgery. I met a 32 yr old girl at the infusion center yesterday. She is also pregnant with her second child. She was looking great and said she's feeling good. I hope that gives you inspiration. Message me if you ever want to talk. I know how strange it is to be a healthy young person with all these plans one month then the next month you're bald with a completely different life undergoing things you never thought you would!! *Hugs

SkiChick86

Lovemyfurbabies - thanks, it is really good to hear that there are others in the same boat as me even though I hate that anyone else has to be going through this. I had my first round of chemo yesterday. So far I feel ok but I know it will take a few days for symptoms to hit so I'm nervously awaiting them. My OB did say that her pregnant patients usually handle chemo better than non-pregnant patients so here's hoping. I hope you're doing ok after your treatment as well!

I have a few weeks before I have to think about hair loss, but wondering how you younger ladies handled it? It's not so much losing my hair that worries me but all the stares and pitty that I'm sure will come with it, especially because I'm so young. I just worrying it will make me a target for stares and (certainly well-intentioned but) unwanted comments. Thoughts

Mom_of_twins

Hi Skichick,

It's all so hard. Everyone is different regarding the hair loss thing. Some decide to go bald and others prefer not to. I was very sensitive and concerned about the stares and pity, so I invested in a really nice human hair wig. No one had a clue that I was bald and was able to go out as (almost) normal without the stares.

It's a personal decision and you have to figure out what you're comfortable with. I have a short pixie cut now, but long enough where no one stares or thinks of me as a cancer patient. I had super long hair before so am anxiously waiting for it to grow out again! Feels like it's taking forever

BlueKoala

I had long hair, cut it into a bob just before I started chemo to make losing it less traumatic. But then I only lost two-thirds of it, so instead of shaving it I wore a scarf and it looked like I just had short hair underneath.

Then when I was on Taxol the rest fell out so I shaved it all.

I kept it covered because a) I didn't want to upset anyone b) I didn't want to be pitied. By the end, I think I just looked sick regardless of what I wore, so maybe I should have gone bald. I don't think I could have handled the comments, though. Everyone feels they have to say something to you about how you look!

I started going without anything on my head about a month after I finished chemo.

Stephmoen

I was diagnosed at 29 triple positive stage 1 I am 31 now and doing well had a complete response to chemo! It scares me that so many young women are getting diagnosed now

Sabina1974

Hi Mcclure77

I was 41, had a clear mammo two years previous even though I had burning pain through my left nipple. I was told everything was fine, roll on exactly 24 months later had 1.6 cm tumour and my breast full of DCIS so had to have breast removed which I am finding hard to cope with. It is very hard at the start of the journey but you will get there. I find it so comforting reading all these ladies stories, it gives me hope for the future.

Sabina

Sabina1974

Hi All

I was diagnosed at 41 which is also considered young. This is my 3rd cancer diagnosis in my 41 years, I had a rare tissue cancer twice when I was 16 and 18 and because of that getting pregnant was difficult. We managed to have our beautiful boy in 2008 and I was hoping for more but never happened and of course now with this diagnosis it will not be happening. Life is just so cruel sometimes and I feel like I have been cheated in some ways, but I have to stay positive and hope I can beat this cancer diagnosis. Love to ye all from the Emerald Isle.

Sabina

39momof3

I was recently diagnosed at age 39. I have a three year old son and 10 month old twin girls. I'm starting neoadjuvant chemo on 2/24 for four months followed by a lumpectomy and radiation. I'm scared about being able to take care of my kids during treatments. This is all happening so fast. So scary

ShannaM

30momof3-

I was dx at 32, I am just about a year out. I also have three kids. I did neoadjuvant chemo as well. My husband and I talked to our older daughter and she was an amazing help through everything. It's a bit heart breaking that your children has to see you go through such a difficult ordeal. I think it makes that grow up a little faster than they should. The younger ones don't understand. I also have a two year old, and all they want to do it be held and cuddle. It's hard to tell them that you cant pick them up because you're in pain. You will get better though! It's important to realize that you just need to take it one day at a time. I was lucky enough to not have a difficult time with my chemo. I tolerated it pretty well. Some people may not be in the same boat, but I think if you're younger your body will recover more quickly. Good Luck, message me if you need anything!

39momof3

ShannaM - thank you so much for the response! It makes me feel a lot better to hear from someone close in age with young kids who already went through the same treatment. Glad.to hear that you tolerated the chemo well. I'm hoping for the same!

Amoconn

i am 42. I was 41 at diagnosis. Second mammogram and I am Stage 3

Momy4ever

Amoconn, same as you, I will be 42 in June, diagnosed at 41 andI have 3 kids ( 6, 4 and 2 years old)

SSInUK

So sorry for you younger women - cancer treatment is no way to spend your prime years; it totally sucks and is utterly unfair; but, hold onto the fact that your Oncs REALLY want to save your lives. They'll throw the book at you, in a good way. I was diagnosed at a venerable 48 and am now an ancient decrepit 51, but I identify as an outlier to your group somewhat as I had my kid v late and she was only 4 when I was diagnosed so I went thru treatment as an old/young mum. I am now thinking of setting up a charity to provide support for kids with parents going through cancer treatment, because it did my heart in to see how it knocked my little girl'sconference in life. She's doing great now though. Oh dear, now I feel like a granny gatecrashing, sorry!

DancingElizabeth

Hi SSinUK...I can totally relate to your post...I was dx'd at age 48 and DD was 9 at the time...

It will be 1 year since my Dx - next month...I am now 49...young to have been dx'd with BC...but...on the old side of young!

Loupita

Hello everyone

Figured I would chime in.

I was dx in Oct 2016 at the age of 27. It wasn't until 3 of my lymphnodes started hurting that I realised something was wrong. I had been doing regular breast exams in the shower for years.

I was referred to a breast specialist who assured me he could feel nothing untoward in my breast. And thought the nodes were just due to an infection. It was only because I mentioned night sweats that he decided to biopsy a node. He thought it could maybe be lymphoma. During the biopsy I asked them to scan the breast as well. Came back clear, no sign of a lump. A week later I was urgently asked to come to the hospital. They had found bc in the node. I had another ultrasound - clear. A mammogram - some calcification. An MRI 4cm tumor. PET-CT 8cm tumor and internal mammary nodes positive.

What a shock. From "its nothing" to "it's very large" within a week. Even knowing it was there it was impossible to feel or see on ultrasound.

I've now had chemo and dmx. It's grade 2 triple + IDC. Chemo worked alright as only 20% of the tumor remained after chemo though I was hoping for PCR. Internal nodes still positive despite chemo so having rads. This has unfortunately been delayed by a large infected seroma in my axilla following the ANC.

Just started tamoxifen which I will be on for 10 years. Before chemo we tried to collect eggs but I found out from my AMH test that I am almost infertile and there was no time to collect eggs. I've now resigned myself to never be a biological mother. It's tough to say the least. The way I cope is by telling myself that everyone has a set amount of struggle and hardship which they have to go through in life, and I am simply getting mine over with now so that I can live well later.

Lovely meeting you all.

Xx

Anna-33

Hello

How are you all doing? I am 32 and diagnosed stage III. 8/26 lymphnodes. ER/PGR +. I did mastectom before chemo. Just started Taxol. How did you choose between aromataseinhibitators and tamoxifen?

DancingElizabeth

Hi Anna,

Welcome...glad you found us - but - sorry you have to be here - at the same time!

I'm on the "older" side of "younger" (48 at time of dx last yr). I did my mastectomies before chemo - also.

My Onc. ran bloodwork to confirm that I was in Menopause (Chemo sent me into menopause - but I was already peri-menopausal at time of dx).

Good Luck to you!! The beginning of all of this - is the hardest...

Edited to add: I'm on Arimidex...

Moderators

Anna-in-Norway, welcome and glad you found us here. What are your physicians suggesting for an AI vs. Tamoxifen?

You may find this section helpful however on AIs vs Tamoxifen:Aromatase inhibitors or Tamoxifen for pre-menopausal women

We're all here for you!

Anna-33

Thank you for answearing! My onc told me that they are just opening for premenopausale women to get AI instead of tamoxifen....but its ip to me... Zoladex added.

LM070917

Hey Anna, I was dx at 34 nearly two years ago. I'm on zoladex and arimidex. Arimidex has shown to be slightly more effective than tamoxifen and doesn't include rare side effect uterine cancer, although it does have other issues like reducing bone density etc.

stephilosphy00

Hi, Anna

I am so sorry you have to join us. I was diagnosed last Oct at very young age (29). I have finished chemo and surgery now and will start radiation in two months. I started Tamoxifen 2 weeks ago but my onc want to switch me to Aromasin plus Lupron (similar to Arimidex and Zoladex Lottermarine is on) in a few months as this combo is slightly more effective than Tamoxifen for young women.

MeToo14

I was diagnosed at 35, I had been married for less than a year. I did well through all my treatment and have been on Zoladex and Aromasin for two years. I have tolerated it ok, my hair has really thinned, I have put on 15 pounds but all in all, I have done well.

Anna-33

I am so scared because of all the lymphnodes involved. Did you start Zoladex before Aromataseinhibitator?

LM070917

Hey Anna, how many nodes did you have? Try not to worry too much, the main thing is getting the right treatment for you. I started zoladex prior to chemo to help shut down my ovaries, this was a good 6 months before arimidex.

Anna-33

At least 8 lymphnodes with makrometastasis... In addition it is seen remaining lymphnodes that may/mat not have metastasis at CT...

Mahsa_sh

I was diagnosed at age of 35. Stage 3a, will finish last round of chemo this Friday.

Hope you are doing well!