How vain are you?

wyo

wow- lots of posts today- must be the weather LOL

I think intellectual vanity and physical vanity are in some ways signs of health self-esteem.  I think that self-esteem (of both forms) takes a major hit when your hair falls out, your toenails loosen, you can't eat or you are sitting naked from the waist up on the rad table arms held high!! 

Once active treatment is over for me I noticed I was ready to get my confidence back and care and concern for appearance is a good sign that the psyche is working its way back to some semblance of normal. 

A good belly laugh or too is excellent for both physical and mental well-being and I get that here a lot so thanks- on the days its slow I can watch the "waxing"video I still crack up even knowing it by heart. 

Jean Nate' in the fridge- my mom always did that it felt sooo  sophisticated.  I loved Love's baby soft - I like Pure Grace now for some reason it reminds me of summertime and sunshine- love it for more exciting nights out Body by Victoria is a fav

MelissaDallas

Blessings, both my mom & dad were high school teachers. Now my sister teaches alternative high school.

barbe1958

You can't be caught wearing shorts if you don't own any. Seriously. I've used capris for years and years and years and years.....MUCH more slimming!!! I don't think I've EVER seen an "older" woman look good wearing shorts!! If her legs are okay, her belly isn't or if her belly is okay, her legs are chicken-y. (I HATE seeing the clear outline of the bone underneath the skin!!!! ) Muscle definition is one thing, but bone definition is just gross. (Now I know y'all are looking at your legs...right?) I can't STAND seeing an "empty ass" pair of pants or shorts. For heavens sake look in the friggin' mirror!!!! See that bag of fabric hanging off your ass? It's because you're not wearing the right size!!!! I golf at times so I've seen a LOT of women wearing shorts!! Golf shorts are well-made and tailored but the bodies underneath can still be pretty bad. I golf in capris. Couldn't have done it years ago but thankfully now they allow it. I guess the rule-makers agree with me.

Wow, didn't know I had so much feeling about shorts!! Who knew????

Momine

Shorts!  After I gave birth, I had stretch marks on my thighs, and also an odd little pocket of fat on the inside of my knee and an unsightlu stomach bulge (later discovered it was from horrible adhesions). That all bugged me no end and made me unable to bring myself to wear shorts, pencil skirts etc. I actually look a lot better now, but I am 50 and I live in a city. Call me old-fashioned, but I can't imagine wearing shorts in town. Young girls get away with it. They wear denim daisy dukes over black tights and combat boots. It looks cute, but at 50 it would definitely fall in the ridiculous grandma category.

barbe1958

I wear pencil skirts with longer loose tops over them and black tights with ankle boots. I think I look pretty cool at 55 and am really rocking the look. I have too many bulgy places on my sort of still great legs to wear a sheer nylon but wanted to wear something different than pants. I have bulges on the back of my calves that I HATE in capris, but I figure if I'm talking to someone face-to-face they can't see the back of my legs. Don't care when I walk away though...

MelissaDallas

Anyone who can enter into a "no shorts" conversation, regardless of weight or body type, does not live where it may be 113 degrees during the summer. 

I also think capris make women who are short & dumpy look shorter & dumpier. It is a very unflattering length on lots of women. 

MelissaDallas

yeah, but it works best with raw milk from a dairy that is very difficult to obtain, as well as the citric acid & culture that will have to be either ordered online or entail a visit to a brewer's supply in a part of the city that is a long drive from here.

Momine

Melissa, lol! It is HOT in Athens too, but I get by with linen skirts and the like.

MelissaDallas

Momine, I generally wear dresses or skirts to work, but I can't worry about how I look at the grocery store at 7:00 am when it is this hot.

AmyfromMI

Hi ladies, back to Botox and Juviderm. Groupon is running a special right now.  At least in the Detroit area.  Maybe in yours as well.  If interested, you may want to check it out.

Re: shorts or skirts - I will not wear anything above the knee.  I HATE my knees.  Always have.  And I agree, there are some people who should not wear capris (men included)!!

exbrnxgrl

No shorts off me for many years. Capri and crop pants are my friends. I am short, with short legs, but not heavy. I find that slimmer, tailored ones look better than the looser ones. I also like flowy  skirts, but because I'm petite, have to make sure that they're no too voluminous. At work, since I'm always bending down to the level of 6&7 year olds, it's almost always pants or capris.

Caryn

islandmom

I live in Florida and lots of 'older women' wear shorts in the summer. I personally do not wear shorts because I have a scar.

I am petite and thin (size 2). I try lots of clothes to find something that flatters me. If I wear baggy capris I get the "empty ass" look but in fitted ones I look good.

I am 51 years old and I would say I look better now than 10 years ago thanks to Bodypump (weight-class) which I do religiously and because I am good at finding the right clothes.

Momine

Melissa, no judgment from me, just can't bring myself to do it in the city.

exbrnxgrl

Momine,

You're just a good old fashioned gal

Caryn

Momine

Bronx, definitely!

MelissaDallas

When you are talking most of Dallas and "city" it is more Walmartians than Manhattan.

Blessings2011

I may try shorts again once I save up enough money to erase my gazillion varicose and spider veins.

If only I tanned, maybe that would take the focus off them. But I usually am as white as a sheet of copy paper. 

In the meantime, it's capris for me, but with a touch of spandex, so they look good under a baggy top.

(Has anyone had their veins done? Was it worth it?)

Ariom

Islandmom, Bodypump! what an amazing workout that is!

I started doing it when it first came to Australia, I loved it and became addicted to it. Boy, did it sculpt your body, and fast! and the music was fabulous.

I was Dx with Rheumatoid Arthritis, and that put an end to that form of exercise. I wish there was a "Seniors" version! LOL

elimar86861

Blessings2011,  I had sclerotherapy on a vein in my leg that was getting the varicose "road map" look, but it was not strictly vanity that drove me to it because it had a persistent dull ache, although I was hoping my "chicken legs" would look nicer in shorts too.  Anyway, that was about 10 years ago.  The dull ache never returned to the area, but a couple years ago, I noticed that a small area below the part that I had treated was beginning to look slightly raised thru' the skin.  Spider veins usually take more than one treatment because it is hard to get the solution injected into the tiny spider veins and some can get missed.  I had one treatment that got about half of mine.  My spider vein area was from a bruise, not from the varicose vein.  If varicose veins are the underlying cause of the spider veins, they usually return if you do not treat the varicose veins as well.

My knowledge is limited, and old.  I think there are laser procedures for both now.

exbrnxgrl

Oh, Melissa, now you've started me on another tangent. I once heard that some people are Walmart people and others are Target people. I fall squarely into the Target camp. Walmart is my idea of hell on earth. If anyone is a Walmart shopper, I mean no offense. It's just not my cup of tea. I go there for only two reasons. 1) they carry Bunn coffee filters, which are taller than other basket filters and the only ones I can use in my Bunn coffee maker 2) in August, they have great prices on all of the items I put in the "school tools" boxes for my students. Since I'm buying for an entire class the savings are hard to beat.

My younger dd and SIL like Walmart and I still love them dearly

MelissaDallas

I hardly ever go in one because they are all out of my way. Sometimes they are the only place I can find certain things though. I do stop in Target every once in a while because it is on my way home. I find that they don't tend to have houseware/hardware things I'm looking for though.

I was so excited to go to that cheese class because it got me in the new very nice Ace Hardware it was held in. So nice to have one close because I just despise spending an hour on a trip to Home Depot to find one $2 item.

Ariom

kb, I hadn't thought of that. I do exercises to increase my muscle tone across my chest, but hadn't considered that you can't compress reconstruction.

We have an exercise program at the gym in town that is called "Prepare to Paddle" which was designed for the ladies who are part of the Dragon Boat team. We have 3 quite large Breast Cancer Groups with a membership of almost 90 women from the region and about 30 of them are on the Dragon Boat team, which travels all over the world to compete. I tried that out and quite liked it, but getting myself to drive into the Gym in the next town, a few times a week, doesn't appeal much right now. We are in the middle of the hottest Summer on record. Hopefully, I might get the impetus to do it in the cooler weather.

wyo

Hi all

woo hoo we go from evening gowns to the walmart culture without batting and eye.  I have to say I think the Walmarts in Dallas must be something "special" reason I say this is when my son was living in Dallas he could not bear to go there and he grew up in Wyoming where Walmart is frequently all there is and we fondly hope we might get a "Tar jey"- said with fake french accent in some distant future. Not sure what it was but it was disturbing enough he could not return LOL

Capris- I once read on the UK Daily Mail (peer-reviewed journal quality don't you know hehe) that some star said people who wore capris were indecisive and could not make up their minds between pants and shorts. I wear shorts in hawaii, miami and palm springs because its just sooo hot-- long shorts though.  

islandmom

Ariom too bad you cannot do Bodypump.  The important thing is that you keep active. The Dragon Boat Team sounds like a lot of fun. 

I asked my PS about doing weights and he said as long as I build slowly he saw no problem with it.  Before BC I was a couch potato I only started exercising right at the time I started chemo, which was three years ago.   All I would do then was walk on the treadmill wearing my wig of course.  I have been doing Bodypump for two years and I have never felt stronger.   

I use to not like Walmart but I find myself shopping there a lot more frequently, probably because the prices are lower.  

Anonymous

kayb - when I had implants, I had the same problem you do.  Only thing that really worked for me, was an "against the wall" push up.  Standing a few feet away, hands shoulder width apart, lean straight into wall - not as much pressure on pecs, but still gets the arms.

barbe1958

In 113 degree weather, the last thing I would want is two extra layers of fabric between my legs! That's where a nice skirt comes into play.... Long walking shorts are smart and the same idea as capris. Capris are great if you have nasty veins. I think we were talking about "daisy dukes" when we said "shorts" 3 or 4 pages ago.....

You make your body look shorter by the colour contrast you wear, not necessarily the product. If you wear black capris and a white top, yes you do chop your body in half. But a nicely coordinated outfit can make you look slimmer if it fits well. I started wearing more form-fitting clothes even with being flat and people I haven't seen in a while think I've lost a TON of weight. 6 pounds only - 3 from each breast!! But instead of being buried in voluminous fabric, you can now get an idea of form under what I wear and it comes across as more flattering in my case. I think we underestimate or over-analyze our body images in a negative way more than we realize. I used to admire how women with bigger bums had the guts to wear short tops that showed off their bums but now I get it. It's more flattering to see the shape than to just have a loose top hanging over it all making it like a tent.

SelenaWolf

I wear old, frayed, denim cutoffs to garden in that I've had since my teens and I have a pair of cycling shorts that I wear when I'm on the trail.  Otherwise, if I'm going out in public in summer, I change to jeans, chinos, a skirt or a maxi-length sundress.  I might; however, try the "walking short suit" this summer; a slim-flitting "short" that goes to the knee, but isn't as shapeless as a Bermuda and a suit jacket.  I'll have to check if my workplace dress code allows it...

In winter - at work - I'm a suit person, mostly dark colours (longer jacket and pencil skirt) or coat-dresses, 'cause conservative is needed for the death care industry.  Just a year or two prior to cancer, I "stripped down" my look from full-blown Victorian-romantic to tailored: the long hair went, the lace went and I adopted a cleaner, more tailored look that - for my stage in life (53 years) - just seemed more appropriate and timeless.  In my "down time", it's slim-leg jeans (definitely NOT low waist; I do NOT like the sensation of my ass flying out when I sit down), a crisp white shirt or tee and boots (in winter) or loafers (in summer).

And the best thing fashion ever invented for us long-bodied girls is the tankini: more coverage than a two-piece, but a hell of a lot more comfortable than a too-short one piece that gives you a permanent wedgy!

MelissaDallas

Barbe, body types come into play here. When we talk about chicken legs & pencil skirts we are NOT talking about hippy girls. Skirts are extremely uncomfortable in high heat climates when you have generous thighs that rub together & sweat. I have a little torso with a (comparatively) tiny waist & generous thighs & bottom.  The only way a pencil skirt would ever fit me would be if it were custom made. Even if I wear all one color if I am cut off mid-calf by my clothes I look shorter & wider through the butt.

exbrnxgrl

Just a few of my antique/vintage purses. Some are Whiting&Davis, some Mandalian. The silver one on the left is a chatelaine purse, complete with monogrammed chatelaine clip.

exbrnxgrl