September 2013 Chemo Group

simplelife4real

Hi All,

Lighthouse....thank you for saying what you did about the nodes.  I haven't had a chance to see my oncologist yet to ask her about the significance of having cancer in two nodes after chemo.  It's just really scary for me since I'm triple negative.   I'm hoping she will say something similar to what your oncologist told you.

 Even though I got two drains out yesterday, I'm still feeling a lot of discomfort.  The trip to Nashville yesterday to get the drains out was exhausting and we had very loud storms last night with a tornado watch on top of them.  I think I'm just really tired this morning and as a result, I've been crying a lot.  Most of the time, I'm okay, but I'm not today.  I think an Ativan, a pain pill and a nap are in order....

Cougarlicious

Simplelife - lots of hugs, I know having any residual cancer after all this chemo is scary (and even more so when you don't have any hormone therapy to rely on) but it sounds like if it was strong enough to take out your tumor it probably stopped whatever was found in the nodes before it caused too much damage.

Betterlife - congrats on no more rads and chemo!  Same to Mercedes for ringing that bell!  I missed out on that "final chemo" experience my docs cut me off after Taxol 10 unexpectedly.  So no bell, no sign, no confetti.  It doesn't even feel right to do a belated celebration.  

Vintage gal - my doc explained that I will most likely be given a rads recommendation, but my PS is still going to put in TE at time of surgery.  From what I understand they will leave a little extra skin, expecting it to contract after rads?   I'm sure every surgeon's comfort level is different with doing it with rads, if you really want it done you can always get another opinion from a PS that is more skilled at doing it.  There are lots of women who get implants before rads, the complication rate is just higher and maybe that's what your PS doesn't like.

When we are done with the hair tracking selfies, are we moving onto reconstructed booby selfies?  Lol.

Feeling better...at my pre-op appointment on Tuesday, they did a needle aspiration on a node that popped up on exam.  I could've waited since surgery is next week but I kinda wanted to know if my stupid growing tumor has finally spread to my nodes.  Luckily results came back negative - whew!  That's not to say something won't be found during surgery but this makes me feel a little better that there's a good chance the cancer is still contained in the breast.  My tumor is now larger than when I started, going over 3.5cm.  I'm only 2 weeks PFC.  It's growing super fast, my MRI three weeks ago showed 1.8cm mass.  Ugh.  At least it will be out soon!

knightzoo

My PS is constantly talking about the flap as her backup and says 40% of implants fail on rad side. I will not to a flap as I already have chronic back pain issues so hope I'm in the 60%. Otherwise I need to gain some tummy fat! I'm saddened by the TE to implant info. I'm only filled to 350 and am physically the size I want to be, hopefully we can translate that same size in surgery because we can't fill more now. My rad plan was done early so I had my final sim yesterday and start today instead of Monday. I'm nervous. 

Congrats on the path reports simplelife and betterday, significant shrinkage means you got any microscopic growth elsewhere in your body, that is the goal of chemo! 

Merecedes, yay on no more chemo! 

I'm having a lot of tightness in my chest still from the fills but it's not pain. And 5 weeks PFC today, I see no significant hair and am extremely frustrated by that! What I have is towhead blonde, so it's not visible unless you're super close. Ugh. I'm so ready to be normal. To feel normal. To look normal. 

knightzoo

kj- boosts are to the breast area and don't apply to you (or me) since you had bmx. I am getting conventional rad, no IMRT to play with. 

Miss_Mama_Bear

Hello ladies! I am so very behind and can't catch up. Surgery was Monday and I am still in a lot of pain. Everyday does get a little bit better, though. I was thinking about going to my PS because my right side is really sore but it seems a bit better today. It looks a bit weird, but I think it is just swelling maybe? Of course both sides look a bit weird. My sister thinks I am just over-doing it but I'm not doing much at all. I was so completely exhausted this morning again (yesterday was the first day that I didn't sleep the majority of the day) and went back to bed for a couple hours. I only had a couple doses of the "good stuff" in the hospital (Dilaudid) because it was giving me a migraine, so all I have taken for pain is Lortab (which I am probably pretty tolerant of because I had been taking it all through chemo) it has been hell! My pain has stayed at a minimum of a 3-4 throughout but it is down to maybe a 2-3 today- except my right side. How do you know if the pain is something to worry about or if it is just the TE stretching? I am not sure how much saline he put in during surgery, but if I had to guess I would say 100-120cc. It feels like a pinching sensation around the edges of the TE and it hurts to take a deep breath. 

My boyfriend has been a rock. He text my SIL the whole time she was at the hospital during my surgery and then came to see me. He didn't stay long because I kept saying that I didn't want to sleep when he was there lol. Then he text my SIL again and asked if he could come back lol. He tried to sleep in the chair beside me but I kicked him out. He flew out to Atlanta this morning until Monday so that kind of sucks. My SIL was amazing in the hospital, and my sister has been great at home. So many people have pitched in and brought food, too. It has been wonderful! 

I kind of had a bit of meltdown last night thinking about everything. I was backpedaling on the idea of a BMX again, but realized that is a bit late for that lol. I kind of got myself overwhelmed with the idea of being in a relationship right now and seeing myself in the mirror... I just keep repeating what my BS said "this isn't the final product" and both she and my PS said that I looked wonderful so far (no idea what they are talking about though lol) I was shocked at how much sensation I DO have though. I was prepared to feel like I had been injected with Novocain in pretty much the entirety of my upper torso, but that wasn't the case, and I know that nerve function may even improve in time so that made me happy. 

Anyone have vision changes after surgery? I absolutely can NOT see up close with my glasses on now. That is brand new post-op. Is that something that I should report?

Hope everyone is doing well!!

VintageGal1111

Thanks Cougar

 Actually now I am glad I had to make a decision because I wasn't feeling 100% before about the TEs & not at all about the Flap. So all that really got me to really think.

 I have a surgery date March 13 for BMX NO recon at this time. I will give this old body a chance to rest & heal this Spring, get a good summer in (motorcycle riding) & revisit the whole recon thing in the Fall. maybe a different PS, who knows, maybe I'll be ok being flat. (ok flatter than I already am now LOL)

simplelife4real

Well I took Ativan and had a long nap this mornin.  The crying has stopped.  Knightzoo, we finished Ac at the same time if I remember correctly (my  last AC was Jan. 14th).  I have no hair growth at all either.  I inspect my head every morning in the magnifing makeup mirror with a bright light...nada!

lighthouselady

Cougar - I'm glad the node was negative!!! I'll say prayers that your path report from surgery (next week,right?) will be all clear in the nodes!!!!

knightzoo - There are lots of places they can take tissue from. I don't want to do the latismus dorsi flap either (I play golf and think that would seriously hinder that). I don't have enough stomach fat to make 2 breasts (unless they're teeny...LOL), so my PS is either going to do tummy/thigh or just use my thighs. My hair was pure white when it first started coming in, too. Slowly it started showing darker, and now I have a mixture of dark hair and gray. I can't wait until it's long enough to color it!

mamabear - I had a lot of discomfort from the TEs for weeks after surgery. Especially on the left (cancer) side where they took so many nodes out. It gets better, but now that I've gotten some fills, I have that same tightness/discomfort, especially on that side. I'm so thankful that your sister, SIL and your boyfriend have been such a great support system for you. That's great you have some sensation. I have practically none. I can touch just about anywhere on the front of my chest and can't feel a thing. TAKE IT EASY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

simplelife - Yay for a good nap and no more tears! Hang in there... one day at a time.

I feel like Pamela Anderson with my foobs. How do you get used to these things? I'm only at 275 out of 500ml and I feel like I look like I have a coconut bra on. LOL I'm going to be like this (only bigger) until November?????

VintageGal1111

LightHouse

 LOL coconut bra, now I am thinking grass skirt...Hula on Girl!

kjsimpson

9 down, 21 to go.  Starting to see a legit tan line now. It is also starting to itch a little. 

Intense Moments of Radical Thinking 

lighthouselady

Getting there KJ!  

This is what I think TEs feel like.  LOL

I'm so tired.  Driving 7 hours and having two appointments (one was my biggest fill so far and one was therapy) yesterday really wore me out.  Usually my hubby drives because he gets car sick, but he was having dizzy spells so I drove the whole way there and back.  And being tired now is nothing like tired before.   I just thought I was tired before!  I have no idea how Cougar is handling this with a newborn.

I Miss Regular Tiredness

kjsimpson

I Miss Regular Thinking. ;-)

Sorry you are so tired, LHL. Have they checked your blood count lately?

lighthouselady

Not since I saw my MO a few weeks ago.  I think I go back March 4th and they'll do more labs.  

I think I've just been doing too much.  The long trips to Dallas and back wear me out anyway, but when I'm the one doing all the driving it was just that much worse.  

Viji

Take it easy LHL and make sure you take all the necessary vitamins. Have a good weekend everybody.

KJ, I was told that we are still "cooking" (doctor's words) after radiation ends so take care not to be in the sun too long or take too hot showers. A boost is when radiation is targetted toward the tumour bed or where the tumour was. I had that. It is for the last week and takes a shorter time.

Cougar, I agree with LHL, don't know how you do it!

knightzoo

simplelife, yes my last AC was 1/17. Here's to hoping our hair returns THIS week! 

LHL: I'm pretty sure no PS here does thigh or butt tissue... I guess if I have to research that, I will cross that bridge later. 

Survived my first rad. Kinda glad it was a Friday... Two days off. It's still uncomfortable putting my arms up, thankfully PS gave me a muscle relaxer to take an hour before. 

Have a good weekend all!

kjsimpson

Thanks, Viji.  I'm being careful in the shower with the really hot water.  And, I can feel it 'cooking' for about an hour after each treatment.  It is quite warm.  And no worries about the sun here.  Baby, it's cold outside.  ;-)  But, it will be a concern when I go to AZ at the end of March.

Off to buy more vitamins this morning! I think that is part of the reason my energy was down.  I'd run out a several days ago and didn't make the connection.

knightzoo,
Welcome to rads.  How many?

Art123

great news better day.

Cougar - hang in there and good luck.

Knightzoo - I hear you in the rads, implants are Nat's only option so we hope to avoid it.

Her hair us growing back slowly, more a fuzz but light.

I was in the phone with the surgeons all day yesterday and the 26th is still tentative. Won't know until Monday: I'm beyond frustrated.

I saw post earlier about pain pills and constipation. When should she start taking miralax and/or senna tea if surgery is Wednesday.

On Tuesday she would have to go to nuclear medicine to inject radioactive dye. Any pointers in that

Cougarlicious

Luckily my newborn (? he is almost four months now...time sure does fly!) is an angel baby.  Great temperament, wakes up once at night to feed.  Many people told me the transition from 1 to 2 kids is huge...I think since my first was (is) so crazy, this new guy feels like a piece of cake!  I'm sure I will be eating my words soon, but for now I'm enjoying it/him.  I think he knew Mama needed a break, and for that I'm grateful. 

Art - I will be doing the sentinel node injection on Tuesday too.  Docs said I can apply Emla cream around the nipple (yup, they inject it right around the aerola - eek!) but warned me that most people say it doesn't change the pain level. Some people say it's the worst pain they felt, others say it's no big deal.  My nurse told me it will be like a bee sting, and no more painful than the Lovenox shots I have to do daily to prevent blood clotting.  We will see I guess!

Knightzoo - congrats on surviving first rads!

Hope everyone is getting lots of rest and enjoying their coconut boobs!

SpecialK

Art - I would not pre-medicate with anything that contains a laxative.  It is impossible to know if Nat will experience constipation until, and if, it happens.  I never have - throughout the many surgeries and chemo I have had - I am the opposite, so anything with a laxative would be disastrous for me, lol!  Unfortunately, this is one of those things that you either know from previous experience, or have to wait to treat.  The surgery and anesthetic itself usually does not cause the problem, it is the narcotic pain meds that follow.  My BIL is a gastroenterologist and recommends Miralax, to start with regular oral pain med use, if needed.  Good luck, and hope the 26th holds for the date.

Viji

For me, the sentinel node injection was no more painful than the different kinds of biopsies I have had to endure. It is all a pain and in my opinion, if you accept in your mind that it is going to be painful for a short while, it is doable. Good luck to all going through this.

knightzoo

kj- I have 25 rads and have a vacation starting April 1!

lighthouselady

knightzoo - My PS and his colleague are one of only two teams in the US who do a tandom stomach/thigh surgery for recon, but I'm sure there are more who only do the thigh flap.  I have way more "extra" in my legs than my stomach, so I'm glad that's an option for me.  LOL   I'd actually be perfectly happy with implants, but I trust my PS and what he does best with is what I want to do!  Congrats on getting your first radiation under your belt. I'm amazed you can lift your arms enough... I'm still having issues and I had surgery way before you! LOL

KJ - what vitamins are you taking? A multi or several different? Multivitamins make me nauseous, so I just take individual calcium, magnesium, and vitamin D. I should probably add a B in there, too. I didn't know about the "cooking" after radiation.... you have to avoid hot showers?

Art - I've been taking colace (stool softener) every day since I started chemo since I had a lot of issues with that. It won't hurt her to start taking them a few days before surgery. Like SpecialK said, I wouldn't have her take a laxative.  But a stool softener just makes it easier.  I'm sorry you're so frustrated. Why are implants Nat's only option?

Cougar - So happy your baby is an angel. I love that. I didn't have the injection for SNB but I heard the same things.... some people say it stings horribly and others say it's no big deal. I'm hoping the second one for you & Nat!

So I bit the bullet and bought a new wig.  I hated to spend the money (even though I got it pretty cheap on Ebay), but my hair isn't coming in fast enough for me to be comfortable going topless and the two wigs I have are looking pretty ratty.  Here I am with my new curls:

kjsimpson

LHL,    I just take an inexpensive multi-vitamin that has lots of the alphabet it it and iron and dissolves well (not coated). Centrum makes me queezy so I avoid that brand.  As for showers, I normally take pretty hot showers but have toned it down a notch during rads and am avoiding a direct hit to my left chest.  I am also using two bars of special soap, one oatmeal and one aloe. Got them at Super Supplements.  Highly recommend.  

Knightzoo,   I have 21 left and get on a plane for my vacation the next day.  (March 22nd)  I am headed to Arizona. You?

Cougar,    That sounds painful. Good luck. I don't see a huge difference when I use emla cream and when I forget for infusions. 

Anonymous

The new do looks great, LHL. I wish my wig looked as good, I wouldn't be so self-conscious about wearing it.

I am out of the hospital and just wanted to add my 2 cents to the dye injection conversation. I have built up a healthy fear of pain and needles over the last 3 years and I have to say, the dye injection ended up being nothing for me! I mean nothing, painless. A happy surprise. They used a topical spray anesthetic or it could've been the self-medication.

On the bad news side, I have some positive lymph nodes. At least 2, we'll see what the axillary dissection shows. Balls.

Anonymous

SimpleLife, my last chemo was 1/21 and I have no new hair growth, either. Every day, I'm looking in the magnification mirror, only to find nothing. I have 2 new eyebrow hairs and zero new eyelashes.

Depressing!

lighthouselady

Clickchick - {{hugs}}  I'm glad the SNB injection wasn't painful for you, but I'm sorry about the positive nodes.  My path report from surgery showed NINE, so that was pretty depressing.  Hopefully the two they found is all you'll have!  How are you feeling?

Miss_Mama_Bear

I am tired of being a T-Rex. Like, seriously tired of it. UGH

That is all for now.

Anonymous

Thanks, LHL. I can't wrap my mind around the positive nodes. In my mind, I think they found 2 and the third was negative, so the rest should be negative, too. That's naive, I guess. I'm sorry you had nine positive, that is a lot to deal with. I see you've had radiation and the SO is saying that is what's up next for me.

I'm feeling better than I thought I would be from the surgery (but I did have Dilaudid up until about 10am this morning I'm taking Oxycodone, 1 every 6 hours or so and it is keeping the pain under control. My SO released me today and she was keeping the other 2 patients she had from yesterday for a second night, due to nausea. Thank goodness for my cast iron stomach!

lighthouselady

Mamabear - I'm sorry... I know it's not funny, but your post made me laugh.  I was a T-Rex for about six weeks pretty much.  Things just now are getting better for me, but I think I'm a slow-goer in that area.

Clickchick - I will have rads, but haven't started yet.  My PS wanted me fully expanded first, so I won't start for another month or so.  I knew I was going to have rads pretty much since before chemo even started, due to my tumor size & location and a positive node biopsy.  Since I'm BRCA+, I'm happy with doing everything I can to make sure this doesn't come back!!  I'm glad you got to go home!  Take it easy.

Anonymous

Hi friends,  My kids didn't have school this week, so my son and  I went on a mini-vacation DOWNHILL SKIING for a few days at an old fashioned resort a couple of hours from here with no cell coverage or wireless... so I am way behind on all your posts!  It was fun though and I got to rest a lot as we were with a big group of friends and my son skiied and ran around with a pack of boys.   I went slowly on the easiest runs, and the hot tub felt good on my "bad" arm!   I finally start PT next week, so hope to get some pain relief!

I've been thinking of those recovering from surgery, going through RADS, dealing with test results, waiting for their hair to grow, and getting stronger every day!

 I love the curly wig and the coconut boobs, LHL.

I'm 15 weeks PFC and this is my new look! I Maintain Regular Toplessness! 

Patty