Starting Chemo July 2013

TwoHobbies

Angela, so sorry about the rads and your skin.  I had blistering but no bleeding and mine was mostly at the very end and continued to get worse after I was done.  I would think they'd have to take a break if you are bleeding.  Can you send in a picture to your doctor?

soriya123

Angela, im so sorry.  That sounds very painful.    big hugs to you!

2bluestars

Oh Angela, that sounds awful.  You've really had a hard time.  I hope things get better for you real quick!  Hopefully this entire nightmare will be a distant memory soon.  2014 will be your/our year! 

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas.   This is the first Christmas in a long time I've had all three of my boys home, that made it a great Christmas for sure.  The two oldest are in the Army, youngest is 13.   

Love and Peace to all!

soriya123

Ladies, I have something to tell you, even this is kinda personal, i hope it is not inappropriate for me to post this. Since I started chemo i had no desire for sex.  i always turn my husband down n i told him i am not in th mood cus of chemo n cancer craps always in my head.  He understand, my health is more important.  Ladies,it has been 5 months no sex.  I finally agreed to have sex with my husband on Xmas day.  OH boy let me tell you, it hurts so bad.  I feel so dry inside.  It hurts than my first time, if u kno what i mean.  So we have to stop.....too painful for me.LOLzzz  Any of you ladies have this painful sex issue?  Any suggestions or advise what I should use?  Thanks ladies!!!

2bluestars

Soriya, I'm the same way.  I've had ZERO interest in sex.  At least you tried, I haven't even done that, so I don't know if it's painful or not.  My poor hubby.  He's been very patient, I know it's not fair to him.    The thought of that much "exercise" just freaks me out.   I don't have the stamina I had before chemo.  Now I also have the ugly duckling feeling, no hair (it's growing) no boobs, ugly scars, weight gain from the chemo...on and on...

Before this cancer business, I was taking testosterone cream to help in the libido department.  I just got my prescription refilled so that should help.  It was ok'd by all three of my doctors.  

For the dryness, you can try something like astroglide or ky jelly.  That should help.

Girlstrong

Hi soriya123....don't ever feel bad about asking anything, that is what we are alll here for.  I think that the pain you have experienced is most likely due to the dryness that chemo has caused.  We are void of moisture!!  It might help if you use lubricant; there are lots of different brands available at drugstores.  For extra lubrication, your hubby may also want to try a condom with lubrication along with the use of KY jelly etc. 

2bluestars: I am so with you on the "ugly duckling" feeling.  I sometimes don't even recognize myself in the mirror (no hair, sparse eyelashes, faint eyebrows.....).  I am trying to get stronger so that I can also handle what the masectomy scars will look like in addition to all this other stuff. 

P.S. My hair is growing!!!  Not pretty and not in uniform fashion but at least it is growing!!!!  Oh the things that I am now thankful for.....

soriya123

Thank you 2bluestars n Girlstrong.  i will ask my husband to look for those items.   Honestly , eve now i an n the mood either but I feel bad.  I told him to be patient until i'm done with chemo.  so i feel like i have to keep my words.  yes he has been good, very patient.  Never give me a hard time about it.  I too feel ugly duckling when i see myself in the mirror.  i still have eyebrows n eyelashes(loose some), but my hair is everything to me.  I dont feel ugly when i put my wig on, but I cant wear wig all day n night...especially here in California can be hot n make my head sweat.

TwoHobbies

Yes Soriya, I had the same problem with the scary pain.  My ob/gyn recommended astroglide as she said it had a good PH.  I still had some pain with it, so now I'm also using replens two or three times a week which is to replace moisture in general.  The ingredients are mostly glycerin I noticed.  As for libido mine has come back some as I feel better and more normal, but it still kind of comes and goes. Spontaneity is pretty much out as it takes so much preparation so I feel like I'm defective and that doesn't help your mood or desire any either.  Maybe that will get better or maybe we'll get used to the "new normal". 

soriya123

TwoHobbies, do you need prescription for astroglide or replens?  why chemo why???  i am afraid to have sex again now. LOLzz. thanks twohobbies!

TwoHobbies

No these are both over the counter.  I got them at Walgreens.  If these don't help enough ask your doctor.  Believe me it won't be the first time they've heard it, and  I think there's additional things you can do.   

Here's a thread that I had found a while back.  Thankfully she put a funny title or I wouldn't have remembered.  http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/67/topic/759583?page=3#idx_82

m1970

soriya, 

I'm sorry you are experiencing the cruelest side effect of cancer thst no one likes to talk about.  One thing I heard from many survivors is that doing it more makes it hurt less.  Use it or loose it.  I wouldn't know personally, I got a divorce instead. After the divorce I got an Rx for estring, which really makes a big difference with general discomfort post oopherectomy.  I was literally uncomfortable all. the. time. with constant yeast infections.  I also tried vitamin e suppositories which were messy and not something I want to deal with every day.  For lubrication I recommend coconut oil.  Its natural, moisturizing (gets absorbed into the tissues), anti fungal, tasty, smells good, not sticky and can be used as a massage oil. 

Best of luck to you.

Marsha

soriya123

thank you ladies, i kno it is suck on top of cancer, we have to deal with this dryness V......

JeriGrace

Hi Firecrackers,

I have a question too, but not about sex. (No one on my radar for that!)  This is a hair question. My hair is growing (my DIL says I look like Jamie Lee Curtis in an Activia commercial) and it's still pretty soft and downy. Also my eyebrows are sprouting all over the place. My problem is that I seem to have that fuzzy hair all over my cheeks and face too. I thought it was just short and white but when I look closer I see dark hairs too. It really looks like I need to shave!  Has anyone else dealt with this? What did you do? 

I have to share that I just returned from my Celebration Vacation in San Francisco. I was there for 8 days and my 2 sons treated me like a queen, from a fancy restaurant (my dessert plate had Congratulations written in chocolate!), to a trip to Sonoma, to champagne in a pink bottle.  I even did some hiking in Yosemite on Christmas Day - and I am so NOT a hiker! I had finished radiation 10 days before I left and am still healing but I still had enough energy to keep up with my boys. It felt so good to be positive and to look forward to the new year, which I am calling my Year of Health. I couldn't even imagine this 4 months ago. For those of you still in treatment or still recovering, believe me, you'll be here too.  So much credit goes to the Firecrackers for supporting me through the rough stuff. Now let's kick 2013 to the curb and get on with our lives! 

Hannariggs

Hi Sisters,

Cut, Poisoned, Cooked, and now done!  I even presented my Oncologist a turkey pop out thermometer for a gift. LOL.  Had a wonderful bell ringing party and passed out gas/grocery card to a lot of the patients in need.  It was a wonderful day!  For all of you racing to that finishline, it is a wonderful moment. Even though it was an agonizing year, I look back and I am so blessed.  I never thought it would make it. Thanks for all of you being here. 

I am now dealing with the aftermath of the war.  I look like a bald turkey even though my hair is growing back.  The weight gain for me was horrible and I have 3rd degree burns.  But I am proud as hell.  I am ALIVE and Cancer free!

I too have Waginal dryness(as my doctor calls it).  Just be careful  for those of us estrogen positive we do not use premarin crème or anything with estrogen in it.  How about a bottle of cooking oil?  LOL, a bit drastic I know. 

I am headed to Vegas tomorrow for a mini vacation to see the fireworks and ring in the new year.  It seemed only fitting since we came in with fireworks and now leaving with them.   Happy New Year to everyone........all my love

Hannariggs

Angela,

    I had 28 rads and have also bled and have blisters.  Its is excruciating.  Just keep using your crème several times a day.  Let your doctor know, but you can do this!  Only a few more days to go.....

JeriGrace

Hannariggs, as usual you put it so beautifully.  So happy that you reached the finish line with such positivity. Have a wonderful time in Vegas!

Girlstrong

congrats hannariggs, I am so happy you finished on top. 2014 will be a new and wonderful year for us all. Continued blessings and safe travels.......

KTLe

I think about you ladies often. I just haven't gotten around to posting anything. After suffering through chemo, I felt like radiation was a piece of cake. My skin is very fair, and surprisingly, I haven't had any blistering. The wide area of peeling is so gross, but as I keep saying during this journey,"It is what it is." My hair is growing back on my head and the hair on my legs is like a forest, but I don't want to cut it because IT'S HAIR!! It's hair that I now have control of It's been over two months since my last chemo and I am having water faucet diarrhea. I have to take Imodium every few days. Could this actually be another side effect of chemo, even though it's been a few months? Have any or your docs said how long these effects will continue? Thanks for your input. I'm sorry for you ladies who have the opportunity for sex, but can't enjoy it right now. It's been years for me, so I can't even imagine, but with time, I'm hoping it will be a pleasure again. Life will be good again ladies. 2014 is a fresh beginning for all of us!

angelanature

Hi All,thanks for the supportive posts,I have to go today after 3 days off and I'm terrified!Who knew it would be this bad?Soriya,I too have lost interest in sex the last week due to my horrible burns,zaps all desire when half your chest is burned and oozing.I put a red lightbulb in the bedroom light when the redness started and I've never had sex without my wig on.If I put something sexy on I feel almost myself again(pre-burn that is).Being bald,scarred,having estrogen levels dropped,weight gain for some,burned for some,no energy,nausious,hemorroids and constipation,the list goes on.How are we supposed to feel?If my hubby had all these issues he wouldn't feel like it either.Give yourself time,things will get better,be good to yourself,and let your doctor know so he/she can help.What a year we've all had!!WE CAN ONLY GO UP FROM HERE!!!!Happy New Year all,hugs Angela

angelanature

Yah Hannariggs!!I'm sooo happy for you,way to go!!!Jerigrace I've grown a white beard too,the no no is the to go,xo Angela

TwoHobbies

What a year, huh, firecrackers?  Congrats Hanna and JG on finishing and you vacation to celebrate.  Congrats to all those finished and approaching the finish line.  Those who will continue treatment into the New Year, hang in there and we'll just celebrate again when you are done.  

I am so glad to have spent this year with all of you but only wish to repeat the friendship!  I read that you wear green underwear on New Year's to have good health, so I'll be wearing my mint green undies just in case, and hoping mint green is green enough.  I also plan on opening the back door to let the old year out and the front to let the new year in.  Probably more importantly I'll be dedicating next year to all-around good health.  Tweaking diet and more exercise, yes, but some other things that maybe I never paid much attention to such as less stress, more friendships, more play, more hugs, more fun, and maybe even more sex! 

JeriGrace

Happy New Year, Firecrackers! It has been a joy to get to know all of you. Now let's kick unlucky 2013 to the curb and celebrate a healthy new year. TwoHobbies, I have my green undies ready!

2bluestars

I'll toast to that Jeri!  Unlucky '13...buh bye!  Happy New Year everyone!  It's gonna be a whole lot better then this past one for sure.  :-)

m1970

no one told me I need to wear green underwear on New Years.  I'm screwed.

Rambo50

Congrats Hannariggs and JeriGrace!!!  And Happy belated New Year to each of you!

I'm with you, Soriya, in the sex department.  Hubby and I weren't having a lot PRE-cancer, and I have to admit we've not even tried since I finished chemo (of course I've had 2 more surgeries since then). We did talk about it, and he'll follow my lead.  Told him I felt SO unattractive (boobless with concave scars across my chest - yes, my own decision not to reconstruct due to possible complications/rejection from my autoimmunity - and scars from my oophorectomy down low, not to mention the hair thing!!!).  Now I know to be prepared with some lubricants - thanks, Marsha, for suggesting coconut oil.

Angela - hate the trouble you're having with rads  praying things get better and that this step will be over for you soon

I have face fuzz too  Of course I had this before chemo - just hoping it doesn't turn dark!  My eyebrows came back in seemingly overnight - bushier than ever, but I guess it's more in style now, and gives me the chance to reshape them  Oddly my pits are still hairless - lol.

It's back to work full time for me today - hoping for stamina, energy, and lack of chemo brain

Going on the 10th to check about neuropathy, then to visit my mo on the 21st. Trying to think of these as "wellness" visits

Here's to a healthier, happier 2014!!!

2bluestars

Hi!  I hope everyone is doing great!  

I saw my RO on Tuesday.  He drew on me and measured everything so I'm all set to start on Monday.  It seems pretty straight forward.  The first two weeks treatments will be about 5 min, then they'll crank it up.  Other then the no shaving, no deodorant, perfume, lotions and when I shower not to wipe that area, it sounds like it should be easier then the chemo and surgery.  Keeping fingers crossed.

I have the dreaded face fuzz too!  I'm trying not to complain about it because I have hair growing, just wish I could pick and choose when and where!  LOL  My eyebrows are coming in but they are so light it's really hard to tell, eyelashes are darker but shorter then they were before, I hope they'll grow a little longer.  Still don't need to shave my legs...a plus.  But my pits are scary.  The radiation will take care of the right side, so I'll shave the left side soon.  The hairs are so white and its so cold here, there's no hurry.  All in all, I see progress, a return to normal.  :-)

Girlstrong

hi BC sisters: I saw my RO today for a first time consult. She reviewed current literature etc. And ultimately said that the results of studies for radiation post mastectomy are still pending; 10 year data is not yet available but will be in the next 2 years. At this point some patients get rads and some don't but she recommended it since my cancer was grade 3. In the end I agreed to 6 weeks of rads. I have to do what I have to do to get through this; we all do. 

Good news; the breast navigator is working on a surgery date for me. I should know soon, but I was told to expect the surgery in about 3 weeks. 

2 blue stars: I love your hair stories, I am right there with you. I starter using a product called CityLash. It is supposed to encourage eyelash and brow growth....well see. The hair on my head is growing but not uniformly; some areas are growing in faster than others. Anyone else having this issue? 

soriya123

helllo ladies,  it seems many of you ladies got rad or going to do rad.  i feel like im not doing enough.  i asked my mo again, he said no i dont need it, even though based on my age n my agressive tumor.....!!!  

candi07

Girlstrong, I can feel hair fuzz everywhere except the top of my head and near my temples. Praying its just due to slow hair growth and not a sign of permanent hair loss. No hair on legs, armpits..hope this is not TMI but in the private area I never lost all my hair, there is just one spot that is bald...LOL. I started taking Biotin Sunday, hoping that will help speed things up a little. I'm sooo tired of the wig, tugging an pulling making sure its on right and trying to make it look natural. My eyebrows and lashes are almost gone...I started using Brian Josephs brow and lash gel, hopefully it will help salvage what I have left. I been drawing in my brows, everyday they come out differently...UGH.

angelanature

Hi All,Yah I finally got the Silvadene cream!!They switched me to boosts which only fry a small part on my underboob and sideboob,then I'll go back to the whole breast at the end.Hopefully,I'll heal enough by then.I seriously regret doing proton radiation since it has a higher incidence of radiation burns,but now I just to push through it only 2 more weeks,Thank God!!2bluestars start creaming up your breast now x3 a day with vitamin e or lubriderm extra moisture.A woman said she did that weeks prior to rads and she's not anywhere as burnt as me.My hair is growing in enough that my daughter dyed it for me,it came out a beautiful red,how my hair was before chemo.This has really cheered me up there is a light at the end of the tunnel and we will all be back to ourselves eventually.Scarred physically and mentally but back to our lives!!Hugs Angela