Any February 2012 radiation gals out there?

dancetrancer

Nancy, I thought I had FIVE left to go...and was told, nope, you have TEN!  Someone forgot to update my schedule with the 5 boosts at the end.  Yep, it SUCKS! 

misha99

Hey everyone-- reading this just makes me realize how we are all different!!  I just finished number 23 and yesterday was the first day i was really red.  However, it is not painful.  I have not taken even one aleve for rads discomfort!  I hope my luck continues as i have 5 more whole breast treatments and 5 boosts----if I understand my schedule.......and i *think* i do.  I think my paperwork is only counting the whole breast treatments too so i was confused early on.  Overall it is good because at the start my RO said i would have 33 to 38 total treatments and it looks like i will be ending at 33.  I sent a photo of my chest to all my friends and relatives and they were *shocked*.  Got lots of good sympathy notes and encouragement notes!!  Dance-- we can have cyber margaritas on Wednesday, March 28!!

mlm445

El Jay- I feel just like you. I was doing really well until this week (treatment 21 today). My collarbone area is really red, crispy and today started to peel. I just want to cry... I know I'm almost done with my treatment journey, but these last weeks are something for me to handle. I ordered a cream online called radiaderm and the RO has also just prescribed silver sulfadiazine. I can only use the Silver stuff over the weekend. I wonder if the tears are just a cumulation of the entire journey? Chicago, i'm going to try the wash cloth idea for pain... thank you.I'm so sorry to hear about the pain you are experiencing... Geegster... Like you I feel like I have a professional moisture bar next to my bed... I'm to the point I don't know what to put on Thinking of you all...Prayers for all.      

dancetrancer

Misha - oh h*ll yeah, bring on the cyber margaritas!  I told my techs I was gonna bring a pitcher of margaritas for after my last treatment Friday afternoon b/c that will be some d*mn HAPPY HOUR for sure!  LOL!  They said they'd join me but only outside the clinic - no RUI allowed.  el oh el

SuperFoob

Howdy!



One thing I do that helps a bit....I lather on my Aloe then my Calendula and then stand in front of my portable room air conditioner. The cold feels super good, if only for a bit.

My saw my regular ONC yesterday and he gave me Vicodin for the shooting type pain. It helps but I had an extreme bad nightmare last night. I hate that! Like it isn't hard enough to sleep! Grrrrr....



4 boosts left!!!

Chicago1958

NancyJill and Dancetrancer, I would definitely be upset to learn that I had more than expected. They had problems with the cooling system and two of my treatment days were canceled, and I don't even like the end date being pushed into the Monday of another week because of that. (Although now that I think of it, based on what I've learned in this forum, maybe I could get them to double up a day! I'm going to ask!)

And Sherry, I echo everyone else's horror at the morphine, although I'm glad you have it. I know how much I would look forward to a trip to see a college-age kid... here's hoping that you heal up quickly now that you have better rest and a break.

Misha, I think sending photos is awesome.

And hang in there to everyone else. We're all getting close... Someone told me about a treatment center where you ring a big bell when you're done...

pepe001

Yes, I used Radiaderm throughout the treatment. I got 2 more regular and 5 boosters to go and my doctor was amazed on how well my skin has tolerated. No blisters, peeling or anything, just the color is red and tanned.  I use the gel right after the treatment then use the cream 3 times a day and before bed. 

mlm445

pepeoo1 - glad to hear it... I just ordered a box and it's due to come today. I'm crispy...

How many of you are working through treatment. This is my last treatment phase and my company has been supportive. i'm in a sales function, so my travel has been decresed, but I have been limping along. Today my boss started saying things like "this has to be in end of 1st quarter" I'm afraid if I don't produce in the next two weeks that I will be let go... I'm thinking positively and plugging along, but wouldn't it be crazy to get all the way through this.. finish treatment at the end of the month and then be let go.... I'm trying not to worry... Any advice? Hoping you all have a pain free day...     

pupmom

Last treatment today!! Going out with DH to celebrate tonight! 

dancetrancer

Yay Yorkie!!!!!!!!!!!!  

mlm445

double Yay!!! Yorkie

NancyJill

congrats, yorkiemom!

t_leigh

Wow I wish I had found this site sooner - what a great community of support! Today I finished 18 of 34, so I'm just more than halfway done. I am really surprised by the fatigue! The doctor seems to downplay it and tell me to exercise more, so I feel like I must be a wimp! This morning before doing anything, my legs felt like I had been doing squats and were like jelly.



Has anyone else experienced this?

Chicago1958

Hurray, Yorkie!!!

Chicago1958

Also, your photo is really nice, NancyJill.

And mim45, what a jerky boss.

And t_leigh, welcome. Yes, I have scaled way back on exercise because it seemed like too much, and switched from Pilates to yoga. The yoga focus on relaxation and restoration has been a much better fit for me. I figure there will be plenty of time to get back into more vigorous exercise, for now, reserving my energy works better.

Oh, and it occured to me a couple of days ago that I wasn't taking my vitamins (just a multi-vitamin, calcium w/magnesium, and fish oil) and started back on them. Today I feel much less fatigued. Placebo effect, maybe, but it seems to have helped anyway!

macatacmv

Whoo Whoo Yokiemom!!! 

mim45 that would be crazy to get all the way through this and then ....... I hope that is not the case. I would hope your boss would see your commitment and determination to perserve no matter what.I would love to have an employee like you.

I am my own boss and I let myself go, I have lots of travel time and a phsyical job, so I gave myself permission to  rest and take care of my health. The work will always be there.

t_leigh, we are all in this together and react to tx in different ways. The best thing we can do is be kind to ourselves.  

I am struggling with arm issues and lots of fatigue. I am also having breathing issues but my RO says it doesn't have to do with the rads. She was so concerned for me yesterday that she called my PCP. So we all have issues and we get through as best we can.

Had #20 today. so counting down now. 

misha99

25 down and 8 boosts to go.  For the last few days i have a heavy feeling in my hip and lower back that i find hard to describe.  I guess this might be fatigue but it doesnt compare to chemo fatigue---anyone have this going on.  I really feel fine--it is like my energy level is ok but it takes a lot of work once i start moving.....weird. 

dancetrancer

Although most of us are near the end or finished, I thought you might find this article interesting and educational:

Skin Toxicity During Breast Irradiation: Pathophysiology and Management 

I think you have to register, but it's free.  

GrandmaV

I had my last whole breast radiation today.  I will have 5 boosts next week.   My skin is red, but I have no pain, or wounds, or peeling, yet.   Maybe the curcumin works.   It would be interesting to see how the other ladies in the trial are doing.  I haven't noticed any fatigue.  I've been taking my daily walks and am up to 2 miles now.  

dancetrancer

Put a fork in me, cause I'm DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I did a little dance for the rads techs and even jumped up and clicked my feet together.  Then on my way out I threw some change over my shoulder into the water fountain.  I am OUTTA there!!!!!  

Off for some margaritas and dinner.  YES, I AM HAVING A D*MN DRINK!  LOL 

Allagashmaggie

All of you sound much further along than me but I am not sure if there is a March forum or not.  I began radiation treatments on this past Monday the 12th.  I made it through my first 5 and I am home for the weekend.  We have had to move out to be closer to where I receive radiation.  I am happy I have completed the first week and even happier to be home tonight in my own bed.  The first 5 have been uneventful and my radiation therapists are quite non-committal on lotions to use.  They basically told me to be sure to use lotion every night and use anything that does not have alcohol in it.  They said Lubriderm but that has alcohol.  So I found a Jergens Natural lotion that does not.  I am not sure if this will be enough after reading all these posts here.  They said it will take about two weeks to feel any kind of discomfort and the thing they stressed the most was to stay hydrated.  I kind of back offed on that after I finished chemo but now it is back to trying to get those damned 8 to 9 8 oz. servicings of liquid in each day. 

I am finding that this is more emotionally taxing on me than chemo.  Going in there every day is a stark reminder of what I am fighting and this morning while I sat in the waiting room I started crying out of the blue.  I was the only one in the waiting room and I could not hold back the tears.  That doesn't happen often with me these days so it kind of surprised me.  I pulled myself together before they came out to get me. 

My schedule is for 33 treatments.  They told me these include the boosts unless the doctor orders more for some reason but they didn't think that would happen.  I meet with the doctor every Tuesday so next time I plan to ask if some patients get higher doses of radiation than others and if so, what dose am I getting. 

So - I am on my way and can understand why dancetrance jumped up and clicked her feet together when she finished hers.  I think being displaced and not in my own space has a lot to do with my weepiness today.  But I am very fortunate to have a very nice place to stay with the love of my life so I am blessed and need to focus on that fact.

 I am going to savior my time home for the next two days and then onto #6.  Best to all,

Allagashmaggie

dancetrancer

Allagash, I had a break down at rads one day, too.  I too found going in EVERY day to be a major drag - like you said - just throwing the fact that you have cancer in your face every day SUCKS.  Well, some days certainly were easier than others.  You'll push through it and then you'll be clicking YOUR feet together, too!!! 

t_leigh

Thanks for the feedback, Chicago and macatacmv. And congratulations to dancetrancer! I really admire your upbeat attitudes. I finished #19 today, have had skin redness, itching and burning since #7, but have managed it with a concoction of Medline Remedy lotion with olivamine (?), lidocaine and hydrocortisone. Its uncomfortable but not as discouraging as the full on fatigue.



I know I'm lucky - small and early stage, no chemo after lumpectomy. My RO is minutes away and I'm the first appt each day. Best of all, my husband is so very supportive and sensitive. Sharing that with you helps me focus on the positive...it is way too easy to get stuck in your own head and feel bleak!

macatacmv

I had a mini meltdown yesterday at rads. As you know I am having lung issues. I have developed a cough that just won't go away. I have been coughing for the whole time I have been going to the cancer center to have rads. So yesterday after walking to another part of the hospital to drop off an order for a pulmonary function test I came back into the waiting area to wait for my ride. I was coughing because of the exertion, as I was walking over to the jigsaw puzzle table, the receptionist calls out "if you have a cold you shouldn't be touching the puzzle" I said I don't know if it is a cold, no one knows if it is a cold and burst into tears. Man, don't they know how hard it is for us to go in there every day? I am so glad it is the weekend!

sherrybaby

Yay Yorkiemom and dancetrancer!! I am so excited for both of you. I should be done this coming Friday. 

Macatacmv--I am so sorry to hear about your breakdown. I haven't had one in the center yet, but in the car and at home, yes.

I hate how this makes us all feel. I was talking to someone on Thursday and realized I had been dealing with this crap non-stop for exactly 7 months. It just sucks!! On a better note, the pain medication has been a godsend and I am glad I overcame my issue about taking something that is so strong. I also seem to be healing slowly but surely. My center was struck by lightening yesterday and the machine went down, but they are opening up today and will do my last full treatment and do the set up for my boosts.  5 more to go!!

My heartfelt thanks to all of you. You may never know the support you provide but, trust me, it is VERY much appreciated.

Sherry 

dancetrancer

macatacmv...I understand!!!!!!!!!  I remember days driving to rads where I'd be talking to myself the whole way in the car about how I just needed to hold it together for the time I was there, and not lose it.  Our feelings are so at the edge (at least mine are), it is no wonder we have unexpected meltdowns.  Be easy on yourself.  And yes, staff understands, but they really can't fully relate.  No one really can until they are put in this position of your life being out of your control so much and fearing for what is going to happen.  A very intuitive friend of mine told me the other day that he thinks after watching me go through this that you need two very important skills - (1) the strength to fight for control over your life and to kill the beast (2) the ability to give up control over so many things that you will face along the treatment path.  He nailed it for me.  It's really hard for me to balance those two traits - fighting, yet giving in to what we can't control.  It's hard to be a fighter yet be forced to give up control so often.  Tough stuff! 

All you wanted was to just enjoy yourself with that puzzle and not think about cancer for a moment.  And that staff person (unknowingly), took that moment away from you and reminded you of the cancer and what you have lost.  It sounds silly, but it's not.  It's the simple things, sometimes, that hit us hard and remind us of the h*ll trip this is.  

Hugs to you!  You WILL get through this!  

bak94

maca-that was very insensitive of her! I hope you have a very relaxing weekend.

Sherry-glad the medicine is helping you. Wow, lightening?! Hope there wasn't anybody in the machine when it happened! Although, I know they have extreme safety measures in place on the machines:)

Dance-yes, the contol is a big thing! I want to know and control what is going on, of course, I can't.

 I am having pain right down the center of my chest. They are overlapping rads from when I had it in 2003 because of where a positive im/mediastinal node was, just a bit past center. RO said he can shut that field off it my skin gets too bad, skin is not breaking down, it is very red and painful, but no sores yet. I don't really want him to turn off that field becasue I want to make sure that cancer is gone! Scans show it to be gone but I want it zapped good! I can't take any pain medicine because I am having my port reinstalled on Wednesday, my last one was taken out because of infection, and they want it in for my zometa treatment and blood draws. I have had nodes out on both sides, so they don't want to use my arm veins.

I had number 20, 8 more to go.

SorrowInHand

Hi, I'm new to this website but sure glad I found it.  I just started radiation in February and I'm scared to death by the diagnosis, treatment, and final sucess of beating this thing.  I just lost my husband to thoart cancer.  I had a lumpectomy the day before he died, and then received the positive diagnosis a couple of days after he had passed away.  What scares me the most is that he was receiving radiation for his thoart cancer.  He had completed the treatments, and was told he was cancer free, but what happened was that the radiation had severly comprimised his immune system which resulted in him contracting one severe infection after another until it took its toll on his body and he could no longer fight off the infections and passed away.  So now after watching him decline and pass away, I'm faced with having to go through this whole thing all alone, without him and his loving support.  I have no family at all so this is all pretty frightening for me.

I'm about half way through the radiation treatment, and have started to feel the side effects and don't really know what to expect.  Heck, now that I've seen some of the information provided by this website, I've realized I really don't know much about the kind of cancer I have.  This is all so new to me so I'm not famailar with how it all works or goes, and what information I and my doctors should be exchanging.  I see from the information and questions asked on this website now that my doctors haven't really told me much about my breast cancer other than not to worry, I'll be fine.  Heck, breast cancer doesn't even run in my family so I was very shocked never anticipating it, when I received my diagnosis.  They told me that after my lumpectomy that it showed I was positive for breast cancer and that they would start with radiation, not chemo yet because my doctors are concerned with my health going into this thing (have had several other health issues I'm dealing with before the cancer), and the stress and depression I'm dealing with after just losing my husband.  Honestly, at first, I told all the doctors that I didn't want to address my cancer, but my husband made me promise I would take care of it before he passed away, so I'm staying true to my promise to him.

I'm beginning to feel the chronic fatique.  I'm so very, very tired now all of the time, am extremely aching all over (sometimes finding it is hard to move and get comfortable) and have completely lost my appetitie.  I have the taste of metal in my mouth all of the time now and can't seem to ease it with mouthwash or anything. I've lost a lot of weight which to begin with I can't really afford to lose as I've been on the thin side all of my life.  My skin is starting to burn.  I feel so multilated by the lumpectomy and now by what the radiation is doing to me.  I can hardly stand to look at myself in the mirror, and when I do, its very tramatic for me, and I end up just crying hysterically.  It's so sad, scarey, and lonely for me to be going through this alone and missing my husband so very much.

But I'm wondering what to expect with the radiation side effects and I'm trying to learn more about my breast cancer so I can be better informed, advocate for myself and my treatment and make healthy decisions for myself.

So any input, information and support sure would be appreciated.

doxie

Sorrowinhand,

Your post brought tears to my eyes.  You have been through so much lately with the passing of your husband and the discovery and beginning treatment of cancer.  I am so sorry for the loss of your husband.  It's good you've found your way to these boards, the people here can help you in so many ways.  

While some of the symptoms you describe are clearly related to SEs with radiation, I'm concerned that you are also describing symptoms of a depression beyond what might be normal for mourning or reacting to a b c diagnosis and treatment.  You are dealing with both simultaneously, seemingly without support of anyone but your medical team.  Even though your post indicates you are a strong person, no one should have to deal with both these burdens by themselves.  Your drs can refer you to a therapist who can help you with your grief and cancer treatment.  If they only offer pills, please push for the therapist too.  Having someone to talk to will help so much more.  

You can do this.  We are here for you, but please insist that your doctors give you what you need. My thoughts are with you. 

misha99

Sorrow u r in the right place for support. Please considerjoining us in live chat. We gatherin there nightly starting at about 8 central time. There are even aa few ladies in there who have recently lost spouses. Same goes for the rest of u. It is such a nice group ...tell them misha sent u. I think i am the only regular who is currently doing rads but it is great to talk to those who have been there.