Yes, I am Breast Cancer Girl!!!

Anonymous

I was looking through the fliers for groceries and saw the ad... spend $35 on these groceries and get a $10 visa card. How much actually goes to find the cure for breast cancer? How about last year... pink Cambell's soup cans for chicken noodle soup? I was wondering if the noodles or broth would be pink too. I hate shopping this time of the year... pink, pink, pink, PINK everywhere!!!!! Why can't they advertise the same for prostate cancer? Imagine what the balloons would look like?!  

juli0212

       OMG...good one on that DREADFUL TREE!!!    ~juli

Suzybelle

That tree is an "abortion of good taste", as Ignatius Reilly would say.

I guess I could buy it and just buy some little boobies to hang on it....

otter

Hi again.

Well, I took care of that nausea problem.  I also thought of two other things I wanted to mention.

One is the thread "rock" started 2 years ago over on the "Moving Beyond Cancer" forum. Her thread is called, "Pink: Not just for Pepto Bismol anymore." It's a place where many of us have been posting our funnier "pink" finds. Our goal is not to belittle the legitimate fund-raising efforts.  We just wanted a place where we could poke fun at the goofier products ("What were they thinking???"), and wag our fingers at the way companies are exploiting breast cancer and the people it affects. It's called "cause-based marketing," and it's really profitable.

The other thing I wanted to mention was that I received an invitation last week to participate in a BC awareness "lighting ceremony" at the local university campus where I used to work. (I'm retired.)  I was thinking about attending until I got to the part of the invitation I've highlighted below with bold print.

+++++quote begins+++++

"Well, it's that time again. October is breast cancer awareness month and [our university] will be doing its part again this year. The 4th annual lighting of [a famous university building] will take place this Thursday evening at 7:30pm …. There will be a short program with breast cancer statistics and comments from a few survivors. All breast cancer survivors are urged to attend, dressed in pink (of course!!) and sit on the steps of [the famous university building] for the program. [The sports mascot] will be there as well as many students, faculty and staff from the university as well as the community."

+++++quote ends+++++

I was tempted to show up in my "business casual" khaki slacks and navy blue jacket, to see if they would turn me away for violating the survivors' dress code.  But I stayed home and watched a football game instead.

otter

EnglishMajor

Kathy Rich passed along info about this new book:

Pink Ribbon Blues
Pink ribbon paraphernalia saturate shopping malls, billboards, magazines, television, and other venues, all in the name of breast cancer awareness. In this compelling and provocative work, Gayle Sulik shows that though this "pink ribbon culture" has brought breast cancer advocacy much attention, it has not had the desired effect of improving women's health. It may, in fact, have done the opposite. Based on eight years of research, analysis of advertisements and breast cancer awareness campaigns, and hundreds of interviews with those affected by the disease, Pink Ribbon Blues highlights the hidden costs of the pink ribbon as an industry, one in which breast cancer has become merely a brand name with a pink logo. Indeed, while survivors and supporters walk, run, and purchase ribbons for a cure, cancer rates rise, the cancer industry thrives, corporations claim responsible citizenship while profiting from the disease, and breast cancer is stigmatized anew for those who reject the pink ribbon model. But Sulik also outlines alternative organizations that make a real difference, highlights what they do differently, and presents a new agenda for the future.

http://www.amazon.com/Pink-Ribbon-Blues-Culture-Undermines/dp/0199740453 

Suzybelle

Otter - your post is funny, but also kind of sad.  The thing that gets me is that all of this 'pink' stuff is (and this is only my opinion) almost like a celebration of "yay, survivors!  Get up here in your pink crap so that we can objectify you!!!! You got your boobs cut off, lost your hair and you should be so happy!!!!"  It's almost like they forget about the women who die from this stuff.  Nevermind the rest of us that just have to endure years of dealing with the aftermath...whether it's issues with losing our breasts, lymphedema...whatever.

I know I have a skewed attitude about this because of my own personal experiences with cancer and LE but all of this pink crap makes me want to throw up.  I just want to remind all of them about people like my aunt who died of IBC.  Yeah, we are very aware now, thank you. 

Sorry.  I am going to have to take a vow of silence for the rest of the month so that I don't make everyone on this board sick from my constant b#tching about PINK.

juli0212

SuzyBelle:  Please don't stop writing, it's VERY refreshing to read what you write.  Yes, this is a 'serious' topic, but I'm totally in agreement about the PINK stuff.  People who've NOT gone thru bc really have no clue.

Just another note here, I received a 'mass email' from the dealer where I bought my car and have it serviced...asking for:    (drum roll please)   donations for one of the owner's daughters who is 'walking for the cure'.   I immediately wrote back that I DO NOT ACCEPT these types of mass emails asking for money, and was very disappointed that they would use us customers that way.  (I didn't mention that I was a *cough* survivor).  

Yes, there ARE good things being done.  There I said it (rolleyes)  I now recuse myself    ~juli

EnglishMajor

 Everyone knows that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. But not everone knows that Oct. 13 is metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day. 

We are all well too aware of breast cancer which to paraphrase the late Molly Ivins, is massive amounts of no fun. ("First they mutilate you; then they poison you; then they burn you. I have been on blind dates better than that.")

Metastatic breast cancer patients are often overlooked during October. Treatment is for life and many stories don't fit the Triumping Over the Odds template beloved of many journalists writing feature stories on cancer patients.. 

As someone with MBC, I'd like people to know that:

>Metastasis refers to the spread of cancer to different parts of the body, typically the bones, liver and lungs.
>Treatment is lifelong and focuses on control and quality of life vs. curative intent.
>About 6% to 10% of women like me are Stage IV from their initial diagnosis.
>Early detection is not a cure. Metastatic breast cancer can occur ANY time after a woman's original diagnosis, EVEN if she was initially Stage I, II or III.
>Only women with Stage 0 (noninvasive breast cancer) aren't considered to be at risk for metastatic breast cancer.
>Between 20% to 30% of women initially diagnosed with regional stage disease WILL develop metastatic breast cancer.
>Young women DO get metastatic breast cancer.
> There are many different kinds of metastatic breast cancer.
>Treatment choices for MBC are guided by hormone (ER/PR) and HER2 receptor status, location and extent of metastasis (visceral vs. nonvisceral), previous treatment and other factors.
>Any breast lump, thickness or skin abnormality should be checked out. With inflammatory breast cancer, there's no lump-the breast can be red and/or itchy and the skin may have an orange-peel like appearance.
>Women shouldn't use the recent mammogram controversy to postpone their  first mammogram or delay a regularly scheduled exam, especially if they have a family history.
>Mammograms can't detect all cancers. Trust your instinct. If something feels "off" insist on further diagnostic testing.
>Metastatic breast cancer isn't an automatic death sentence-although most women will ultimately die of their disease, some can live long and productive lives.
>There are no hard and fast prognostic statistics for metastatic breast cancer. Every woman's situation is unique.

One last thing courtesy of my Stage IV friend Juniper. Knowing what to say to someone with ANY kind of breast cancer can be difficult.

It's fine to say: "I'm so sorry that you have to face this disease. I will be thinking/praying for you. Please let me know if I can help."

Try to avoid back-handed compliments such as: "You are so strong, if this had to happen, you were the right person to get it because you are brave and strong," or "If I had breast cancer, I would be falling apart or scared to death. You seem just fine with it."

Those statements are akin to "You don't sweat much for a fat person," and we hate them.

There are many excellent online metastatic breast cancer resources. Examples include www.breastcancer.org; www.mbcnetwork.org; and www.metavivor.org.

Suzybelle

EnglishMajor, thank you for your post - so much good info.  I had no idea there was a day devoted to Metastatic Breast Cancer.  Thank you. 

I also personally hated the, "You're so brave.  I admire you so much."  My least fave - "You're such an inspiration."  WTH????

I know they meant well, but I was always tempted to ask, "Why?  Because I got my boobs cut off?  I didn't volunteer to get my boobs cut off, you know.  I was drafted." 

Instead, I just say thanks and go on my way. 

And your info. about mammograms is so dead on.  I had a mammogram in Sept. and they found my cancer the following January.  Nothing had changed on my mammogram...but I asked that they check me out because I was having pain/heat/itchiness.  I had no idea those things were signs of cancer.

p.s.  Edited to add - my all time fave comment made to me after I found out I had LE - "I don't know how you get up in the morning.  I couldn't do it."     uh, yeah.  I was speechless, and that doesn't happen very often.

juli0212

Very good info, EnglishMajor!  Yes, it's difficult to know what to say (what can WE even say to YOU here??  I am speechless), and yes we know y'all mean well (meaning the people who say stuff to us)...so we just kinda take what you say and in-and-outta-the-ears type of thing. 

I can't stress it enough though, my tumor WAS found ONLY by yearly mammogram.  It was against the chest wall, and could not be felt.  I was strongly told that if I'd NOT had that mammogram, the cancer was fast-growing and would've gone straight thru to the lungs, hence it would've metastasized at that point as lymph was already diseased.  My breast surgeon orders the yearly mammogram with ultrasound and a yearly bilateral breast MRI/6 months apart.

We all have our stories, and they are NOT THE SAME, hence I hate bc being treated as there could be a 'cure', how COULD there be?  (And, not to knock this site at all)  We all respond differently, have different bodily systems, respond to meds/chemo/treatments differently.  Just insist on being treated as the individual that you are.

I honestly don't know what to say to the women who are going thru mets.  I am so sorry, because I truly am.    ~juli

1Athena1

You folks are too funny!!

 My hatred of the pink kitsch is such that I chose a general onc rather than someone specializing in breast partly because the first breast and ovarian specialist I saw had nothing by pink paraphenalia in the waiting room. I kid you nor. And my onc is nice, knowledgeable and caring, whereas the previous specialist was hysterical and condescending. 

Suzybelle, that's incredible that people should ask such an ignorant question. I am so glad I have told almost no one. I am also glad I live in a big city. I think the pink kitsch tends to loom less large in urban areas because it has to compete with so much other advertisement. However, I do know which supermarkets to avoid for the month.

EnglishMajor

We all seen some extremes of  Pink Lunacy... I'd like to see less Awareness and more Education/Practical Advice

What if we each took one postive, educational step to counteract Pink October? Just one thing, a personal email or a Facebook posting along the lines of what you just shared.

I don't diminish the worthiness of fund raising activities at all.

But what if a friend had sent me an email reminding me why it's important to have a  mammogram? I had my first (and last) mammogram at 44. Who in your life can you make a difference with?

To paraphrase Peter Gabriel, you can blow out a candle but you can't blow out a fire...I'm only one person. But what if every woman impacted by breast cancer took the time to do one Educational thing during October?  

juli0212

Oh joy.  Our newspaper this Sunday is going to print the comics in PINK background.  The ones participating will also have a PINK ribbon next to the comic's title:  To Raise Awareness.  Are you not aware yet??    hmmmmmmm...juli

Anonymous

Just wonerding in my sarcastic way...

Is breat cancer supposed to be comical? Is that why your newspaper is manking the comic section pink? I don't get their line of thinking.

juli0212

veggy:  Here is the article from our today's Albany Times Union:  "Comic strips turn pink for breast cancer awareness"  The Sunday funnies will be in shades of pink ink Oct. 10 in support of breast cancer awareness month.  King Features Syndicate Inc. said Sunday that more than 50 cartoonists will participate.  Each comic strip will also feature a pink ribbon for breast cancer awareness with the tag line "Cartoonists Care".  The pink strips will run in newspapers nationwide and online.  Participating strips include Blondie, Zits, Dennis the Menace, Family Circus, Hagar the Horrible, Mother Goose & Grimm, Mallard Fillmore, Beetle Bailey, Dustin and The Pajama Diaries.  A gallery of the pink strips will be displayed on a ComicsGoPink website, where donations to seven breast cancer organizations will be accepted."  [unquote]

I don't get it either...raise awareness?  Raise donations by funnies?   Just thought that was a bit over-the-top.  ~juli

Anonymous

It is over-the-top. I wonder what the comics will be based on...let me guess...breast cancer. Blondie gets her first mammo? Family Circus - the mother talks to her daughter about self breast exams? Never mind. Bad sarcasm moment. I apologize.

juli0212

I don't think you need to apologize, veggy...I think we all in this thread especially feel the same way..."enough is ENOUGH!".    That said, I AM grateful for this website and freedom of speech/expression.   Seeing as we went thru what we went thru, I think we're entitled to our opinions.  I DO notice I have a much LOWER tolerance-level, I can dismiss things/people much easier now, it's like I don't need to put up with non-essential-nonsense anymore, and I don't.

~juli

Suzybelle

Did you guys see Sunday Night Football last night?  They had Kelly Rowland of Destiny's Child dressed in pink singing the National Anthem with tons of bc survivors and a huge pink ribbon on the field.

My husband called me in to see it, because he thought it was great.  I wanted to throw up, and then felt really bad about my reaction.  On the one hand, I'm thrilled that everyone is so aware of bc, but on the other hand, I want to say, "Enough already with the freaking awareness.  How about a #$^% cure???" 

I went to Best Buy at lunch and the girl asked me about my compression sleeve and I gave her a very succinct answer about it being from surgery for bc and LE being a side effect of surgery for BC.  Her response was, "Cool." 

Really?  IT's cool??????  I am so freaking over PINKTOBER and everything else about this disease.

1Athena1

How is this for over the top, courtesy of Smith and Wesson. Not as funny as the Christmas tree, but still great. I would have more fun making fun of these people if it weren't so outrageous:

Pinkwashing Turns on Itself with Breast Cancer Awareness Gun

http://www.prwatch.org/node/8671

juli0212

I bet that girl at Best Buy had NO idea what the LE or even bc really means...but that response is tacky:  cool???   If we could light into everyone who really just HAS NO CLUE!  But, of course, we're civilized (why, I wonder, WHY ARE WE????).   Yep, over with PINK, never liked it, never will.   I still say thank you for starting this thread (as always NOT knocking bc awareness either).

But really, 'funnies' in PINK???   WTH????   or WTF????    :O

~juli

Anonymous

Sorry about saying sorry (there I go again). I'm having a lousy day. I'm going off of one antidepressant and switching to another. Brain isn't functioning right. Been crying almost nonstop all day. I've called my counselor and doctor. Maybe I should take a nap for the rest of the day.

juli0212

Ah, veggy...so sorry (oh SNAP!).   That can be difficult indeed.  If you need to 'veg' (pun intended), do what's best for YOU.  We are here for you...pm me if you want...just vent away!   You are SO entitled!   ~juli

juli0212

Oh joy, pink guns now, why not????   All proceeds go to BC research, huh?  OR to the NRA?

GEEEEESH

Suzybelle

Veggy, I'm so sorry you're having a bad time of it...please take care of yourself -

Sending good thoughts and prayers your way!

Suzanne

Anonymous

Thanks. I am now in another crying binge. I should take my Ativan (for anxiety) and just calm down. I hate being like this. (I am not going to say "sorry").

Suzybelle

Veggy, don't feel bad...I had a crying jag this morning.  I have no idea if it's tamox, LE, PTSD, the fact that I'm totally wacked before I ever got BC...there are so many choices. 

One thing's for sure - I'm never boring!

lovemyfamilysomuch

Veg--hang in there sister--thinking of you and sending good wishes

xo

Anonymous

Thanks everyone. Just knowing you're out there somewhere and care - touches my heart. Thanks

juli0212

Isn't it nice to have threads like this and such supportive sisters?!  

Veg:  You had thyroid surgery as well...that also affects your mental mood.  I am hypothyroid and had a parathyroidectomy, so have parathyroid issues as well.  We are ALL entitled to WHATever it is we are feeling at the time, it's something beyond our control sometimes.  Glad you can 'talk' here and hopefully feel better. 

To be honest, I had a HORRIBLE week last week until SuzyBelle started this thread, I won't get into it, I was just SO grateful for everyone's posts.  ~juli

Anonymous

I know about thyroid and depression. The endo wants me to wait aother 4-5 months before having my thyroid levels checked. He said that the medication is slowly improving my level but I am still low. I stopped crying for now. I have a headache and feel shaky.