Calling all TNs

Lookingforward66

Very welcome. Figure we need all the boosts we can get. Especially knowing down days. Just have to grab boot straps & plunge forward.

TifJ

Just logged on after a fun weekend out of town and now have heard about Michelle. I am just numb. May she be comfortable and pain free as she is surrounded by her family's love and adoration. I am so....hurt, sad, angry. I hate you cancer.

Titan

sorry to hear about Luv...but you know she certainly enjoyed every minute..and loved us all to pieces..

and we were all newbies once...it takes alot to come on here and read about our friends dying of this crap....but what can you do...this forum offers alot of support and love...I have seen so many friends die of this but I have also seen many friends survive and thrive...

reading about Michelle...I think her treatment may have something to do with what is going on right now...chemo drugs are so hard on your body...but what do we do..go without? that's a decision we all have to make and live with...I honestly do not know if I would go through chemo again if I had too...it would be a rough decision

jcolford

You make a good point Titan and I have often said the very same thing about chemo. This scares my husband because we do have to face the reality we may have to make that decision again in the future. I watched my mother in law suffer with kidney cancer and I often said that I wouldn't take any kind of treatment but when I was actually diagnosed I was the first one to tell them to give me the works - I guess our natural instinct is to survive but knowing what to expect the second time around and that (for me anyway) the treatment seemed worse than the disease. So sorry to hear about Luv and I think that at some point our bodies just says "enough".

Cocker_Spaniel

Titan and Jcolford the first thing I said to my surgeon was I am not having my breast off, not having radiation and no chemo. He said ok we will see and I thought yea we will cause I'm not having them. Then I got home and told my eldest girl and said he mentioned chemo and radiation and she said of course you will have it and I thought yes of course I will because of you and your sister and the old feller. I don't actually think it becomes your decision. I think it's your families decision and you have it for them. Not that I regret it now, I have gone through it with the help of these ladies here and have come out the other side. I don't know what the future holds I guess we will just have to wait and see but I feel I have given it all that I have. I am left with a weeping left eye, no taste, hardly any smell (can't smell the flowers in my garden much anymore unless they have a strong perfume) and a swollen arm from lymphoedema but I am still here and grateful for every day. I still think I prefer this cancer than motor neurone disease because that to me is cruel and a terrible thing to get and suffer with. My family and my wonderful sisters on here brought me though this as we all will with our newbies. Sure we lose some and that is heart breaking but it happens and we have to get on and live with what we are given. Hope I don't offend anyone, this was not intended to.

InspiredbyDolce

Hi Everyone,

I'm just signing on to respond to a couple of posts - I know everyone is sad, shocked and worried with what happened to Julie, and now learning of Michelle. And I wanted to respond to what someone asked a few pages back, were there extenuating circumstances or other contributors?

It is truly two very sad and heartbreaking situations to read about on here, and let's all please keep Michelle in our thoughts and very fond memories of Julie as well.

If you are scared and reading about these recent updates you will likely feel some anxiety. Fear is hard to conquer but can be done. First off, I do recommend taking a break from the boards when you feel overly anxious. Second, do small things during the day that boost your immunity and decrease your risk of recurrence. Start small and just focus on each little accomplishment. Third, do something you absolutely love today Get yourself back on track to where you were before the recent turn of events. Even if it takes your mind off this for only a little while you will be doing something good for your body. Remember that stress and anxiety are not good for our immune systems, so find a way to release the anxiety. Music and laughter are good.

I wish all of you comfort and peace - and hope that soon you will start to see the beautiful day and future that is ahead of you!

xoxo

ALHusband

Ladies my wife has a t-shirt that says, "You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have!". I can tell you that having already been through the worst chemo there is 16 years ago, if my wife said it once, she said it a thousand times, "If I ever get cancer again, I am NOT going through chemo again." It would always make me scared to hear her say that. Then this past April the unthinkable happened and she was diagnosed with her TNBC. Let me tell you, she never once even considered not having chemo. And she went through it like a champ and came out on the other side. I guess my point is maybe none of us should think about what we will or won't do when and if something happens in the future. Let's try and think about, and enjoy, TODAY, because it's the only sure thing ANY OF US has! I don't have cancer today. My wife has no signs of cancer today. I may get cancer tomorrow! She may get hit by a bus! NONE OF US KNOWS! But if something undesired happens, ""You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have!" and we'll all be strong, and we'll all get through it.

JAN69

Thank you ALH, You said it perfectly.

Debra, thanks for your message and the insight from Michelle. I'm holding her close.

Yes, today I can be strong. J

adagio

inspired - thanks so much for those encouraging words. I can only speak for myself in saying that I have been quite discouraged about my own progress and future from reading about naan and Luv - it all seemed to happen so suddenly and it has kind of left me in a spin not knowing what lies ahead. But you put things in perspective for me - living each day as it comes and to the full - not putting off anything, but grasping opportunities as they arise. Good point about stress and anxiety lowering our immune system. Thanks for taking the time to write the post! Hugs!!!

Jianchi

Alhusband,

Thank you for your encouraging words.

lizlori

So I am now two months past chemo and am preparing for reconstructive surgery which is scheduled for Oct. 30th. However my labs: platelets and neutrophils are low....in fact lower than when I was recieving chemo. I will be having labs again the day before surgery to make sure I am no lower than 103 for platelets....my wbc's were low too, but I did recieve a immune booster shot last week with my vaccination( I am in a study, that is trying a vaccination to prevent reoocurance)....I called my Dr. spoke with the nurse and she said generally lab levels bounce back within a month after chemo, but she said she woul try get a hold of my Dr. and see what he had to say.....so here I sit, worried sick. Has anyone experienced a delay ofnormal lab levels after chemo??? Blah....it is so hard not to worry.......Deb, I loved loved loved your post, I need to really take your suggestions and work on being more at peace. I seem to be more worried in general....Take Care Everyone...

Worrywart9390

Inspired, thank you for your encouraging words, you have such a positive way about you and you do so  much to help us all through.  So sad to hear about Michelle and Julie!!  Our only real choice is to live in the moment and make the best choices we can for ourselves. 

candi07

Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum. I was diagnosed withTN BC in June. Had a lumpectomy, made it through A/C now Taxol DD 4 tx. It is the hardest thing I ever have to deal with in life. Seems like the only person who really understands what I'm going through is my husband. All I get is a bunch of text messages and phone calls asking how I'm doing. Also, keep hearing if you need something let me know....why do I have to let you know. Why can't people just do things for you without you telling them? When I say I'm not able to cook I get the response "oh you don't have little kids, your kids are grown". So what about me don't I need to eat? Very disappointed in my best friend mostly, she cried like a baby when I told her my news and she said she would be here for me and hasn't. I'm sorry to vent here, but I figured some of you may have experienced the same. I feel like I get more support from this website than my own family and friends.

Hope everyone is doing ok....prayers and thoughts are with you all. Please keep me in your prayers.

Thanks

scouser47

Inspired, thank you so much for that, like Adagio I was losing hope, I had decided not to viisit this thread again and then whilst looking for something else saw your post. How awful for Michelle but your explanation of her circumstances has helped.She is in my thoughts.Also Naan was a shock but who knows for sure what happened.

al husband, thanks to you too. We must all just soldier as none of us know what will happen tomorrow.

Edi.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InspiredbyDolce

Oh you all have inspired me back just as much, to know I could help, thank you for your nice comments about the post. In case you all have wondered, I do get concerns sometimes and anxiety does get the best of me as well at times. But when I'm struggling, my best defense is often helping others. Or going out somewhere and causing a lot of trouble. LOL

ALH sure is right. When I first got this, and was in shock, I asked a friend of mine how was I going to handle this, and he said "with grace and class like you do everything else." It made me realize that a) he doesn't really know me .. what grace and class? LOL and b) the only option I do have, is as ALH put it, "you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."

By the way, I've always been very independent, but now that I'm feeling so good with my body recovering from chemo (did take 18 months or longer) I'm back to being my feisty self and everyone in a mile of here has probably heard that I'm back in action!

But it reminds me of a signature line I saw on someone's profile here at the bc forums a while ago, and I totally loved it. It said something like 'they didn't want to arrive at at the end all neat and proper, but rather sliding in sideways yelling with a "Oh yeah, what a trip that was!" Well, I didn't do the bc member justice here, lol, but you get the drift. It made me laugh and smile, and sometimes I think of that when I decide to have my way and do what I want.

Hope it can also inspire all of you to make it a fun trip!

Hugs ladies and 1 ALH!

InspiredbyDolce

Candi - That's funny and I agree ... why do we have to let them know? Why can't people really be more insightful and take a guess at what we might need. How about a phone call just because, not one to check our pulse. I know everyone means well, but after a bc diagnosis, I've noticed I've taken issue with things. The latest for me now is when someone calls and says "how are you?" emphasizing the word you, with the connection to it meaning in reference to the bc. I'm back to normal, just call and start talking now, we don't have to start off with the how are youuuuuuu question anymore.

Regarding the post about blood counts, I have researched that it can take a body 18 months to 24 months to fully recover from chemo, and that you could even have new norms for you that weren't the norm before. Search with some identifying key words in the search section and see if you can find any discussions about it. I had implant exchange 7 weeks later.

Everyone have a nice evening. I'm off to eat some broccoli, red pepper, artichoke hearts and green beans.

Angstapp

OMG!!!!! What terrible news about our lovely Naan, shit shitty shit!!

Love and thoughts to her family and friends and the TNS network, such a kick in the guts to everyone who knew her whether in person or online

Stupidboob

OFF TOPIC

My heart is really sad and partially broken..............Our beloved Skittles got diagnosed with Lymphoma and we may have about 4 to 6 weeks with her. THIS BREAKS MY HEART but for now I am thankful I still have her today. Knowing in a way sucks and then in a way it lets me know to spend every minute with her that I can....(not that I did not do that anyway) I think now she is just like.....Mama Please get off of me. We will meet with the oncologist this week to see if they have any options but not sure of what we will do for her and for our finances.....why must everything come down to money......I only want what is best for her, but not ready to say goodbye. I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND!!!

Thanks for letting me vent

Fighter_34

In reference to vitamins, I have reduced my intake as well. No one had to tell me, but I was getting the feeling that I was approaching the overboard point. However, what is one to do?

Stupidbood- HBD as the young people would say.

Fighter_34

After posting I am now reading a Luv. Heavy heart right, I was logging in to catch and didn't want to read this, but as we know life itself is terminal.

What else can I say?? This crap never gets easier.

I often wonder how doctors deal with this, they have to be strong and remove feelings; because I would be a nervous wreck.

Tazzy

Hi everyone, dont post much these days - just trying to get on wtih life - and I know I'm lucky enough to be able to. I am so sad to hear about Naan and Michelle - FUCK U CANCER (sorry for the potty mouth).

ALHusband - my tag signature line is the same as your wife's t-shirt. So true !!

I send you all love and hugs and remember cherish every moment of this life you can.

Stupidboob

Fighter34 what does HBD stand for? I do not know how doctors do it either..............nor vets. I have cried all day today and they always stand strong. I would not be a good doctor or vet because I would be bawling along with the patients........My vet says it is hard sometimes but they stick with it because of all the good they can do. My biggest question is how they don't lose it when helping us help our babies to the Rainbow Bridge and he said it took a long time for him to get through them but they just have to keep telling themselves it is ending the pets suffering. With human doctors I am not sure how they do it because they don't end our suffering in the same way

adagio

stupidboob - is skittles a dog? I have lost 2 dogs to cancer and it just tears one apart. It is so, so difficult. Hugs to you during this difficult time.

Jianchi

stupidboob: I figured out that skittle must be your pet. Just want you to know that I feel sorry for what's happening to skittle. Life is really hard, and we all have to strong as there is no other choice. Hugs to you.

J

Stupidboob

adagio yes she is my fur baby...............100% Mama's Cancer has stolen so much from me. My mama, my aunt and various fur babies with different types of cancer.... I am sorry you lost your babies to this too. Thank you for sharing and for the hugs

J thank you

InspiredbyDolce

Hi Stupidboob - same here, I sent you a PM yesterday, not sure if you saw it. Thinking of you both. Hugs.

tumornamedclyde

I am terrified of my DX. I am a 21 year veteran of emergency nursing, and have never feared much in my life, but the DX of TNBC has thrown me into a total tailspin. Is is normal to think of your death? Is it normal to plan? Is it normal to figure out "around the time I'll prolly die"? I am driving myself and my family insane. I am 46, my mother had BC in 1989, alive and well today, however we so not know her pathology and HER testing was not available then. Chemo or surgery first is my dilemma....

christina1961

Any thoughts you have during this whirlwind are normal. I was absolutely convinced I was going to die for a very long time. It got better for me, although I still have worries of course. I had chemo first. What I liked about it was they could see how effective the chemo was. In my case, it was not that effective, so I had additional chemo in a clinical trial after my surgery. I also chose to do radiation (I was in a grey area, with 2 positive nodes.) BTW, my initial diagnosis was triple negative and they retested the remaining tumor and found 5-10% ER receptors after surgery. My oncologist believes the tumor mutated in response to the Adriamycin - so I ended up getting to take tamoxifen afterward. The tamoxifen may or may not help, but if I had had surgery first, I would not have this additional option.

I wish you all the best! These boards helped me so much as a tremendous amount of support!

JAN69

tumor -- Oh I was so sure I was going to die! Almost 3 years ago. Been NED for at least 2 years. I was so ignorant about protocols for treating CA that I just did what the doctors suggested. Mod Rad Mast first, then chemo, then rads. On my 1 year dx anniversary I was basking in the sun in Hawaii. I was still a bit weak, but I was so happy to be alive. I was 69 at dx. Best wishes to you. J

Titan

Hey Clyde..hell yes you think you are going to die right away when you first are dx'd....and then...you find out that no..you aren't going to die right away..or possibly for a very long time...takes awhile to get your mind around the whole cancer dx.....you are perfectly normal with your freaking out......been there done that..and awaiting my 5 years out in March...