Class of 2010

mari-12

You ladies are so inspiring to me!!!!  Do you think that an Oncotype score of 24 with 16% recurrence will require chemo?  I am 55 years young. This is my info so far : 3/26/2010, IDC, 1.3cm, Stage I, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-    The Mammoprint put me at High Risk. I wonder if I can get your input. I realize that it's ultimately my decision but perhaps there are questions that I need to be asking myself that I just can't seem to because I'm in a state of panic and confusion! I have to remind myself to breath sometimes.  

I will be meeting with the oncologist again after the re-excision lumpectomy at the end of the month and I hope she will have solid advice. I do know that Arimidex and Rads are in the picture. When I originally met with her the Mammoprint, Fish and Oncotype were not back.  

Some of you have only a few zaps left or are in the midst of chemo, others are done with chemo....how did you make your decision??? 

nancy2721

Hi everyone, Class of 2010 I guess is where I belong. Hope you'll have me. Im 48 yrs old, mother of two boys, and have been waiting for "the other show to drop" since I had my first biospy/aspiration at the age of 15. Year after year got the all clear till I had two cysts- as usual, back in November. The PA thought it was time for an MRI. Thank God I had it. Had a biopsy and found out it was DCIS on January 7th. By the time I got in with a good surgeon I wasnt scheduled till Feb 25th. Then I graduated to the IDC forum. Reexcision and sentinel node on April lst. Started my radiation this past Wednesday- 3 down 28 to go - woohoo!!! Then am planning n tamoxifen- but since I'm on that pre/post menopause curve we have to keep an eye all that. Enough about me. Thank all of you for your love, support, guidance and advice on these forums. This site has been a godsend. Love and hugs to all of you. Nancy

arubajan05

Hi Nancy! 

HAPPY to have you, but sorry you have to join our club!  This is a WONDERFUL forum, full of incredibly brave women who are facing breast cancer.... you are NOT alone!   Glad to hear you are already moving through radiation, I am sure I will need advice from you when I get to those treatments after my chemo!  Hope you have a wonderful weekend! 

HUGS TO ALL!

arubajan05

Oh, and Mari-12 I left you a response on the OncoTypeDX thread!    Hugs!

etk02038

Hi Mari-12 and Nancy...welcome.  Mari-12 that is a tough call. I had that part easy since my oncotype came back at 12. I was prepared to do chemo if it went into the midrange. I am only 49 and have a young son so wanted to do everything posible. It helps some people to try to think a year ahead  and how will you feel about your choice. Will you regret chemo or regret not doing it...still a tough thing to do. If you have a good oncologist that you trust that helps.

I met with my new breast oncologist today and she is so much better than my last. The other one should work at the drive thru Mcdonald's because that is the care she gives her patients. In and out and don't ask a lot of questions.

Well, so  we spent a lot of time with the new onc. and got all of our questions answered. She looked at the pelvic ultrasound and referred me to a gyn/onc for follow up. She still wants me to start tamoxifen in the mean time since I was dx in Jan. and I have to get the ball rolling. She said yes, tamoxifen can make fibroids worse and that will be addressed at the gyn/onc office. I will need another pelvic ultrasound to see what is happening with the cysts and maybe a MRI. If the cysts are still there it looks like they need to come out and in that case the suggestion would be to take both ovaries out. Maybe even the uterus if the fibroids are still causing problems. 

And then when she examined me she felt a lump near my lymph nodes on my "good side". She  asked weather my other onc. felt this. My answer was yes but she wasn't concerned since nothing showed on the mammograms. So I go for an ultrasound tomorrow morning because she is a little concerned. I guess, I will be busy with appointments for awhile!!

retrievermom

Good point, Ellen.  Personally, I looked ahead and felt I would not regret having chemo.  If I chose not to have it, and had a recurrence, I would always wonder if chemo would have gotten it.

Sorry you're having to have another ultrasound.

LINDAGARSIDE

Hi everyone...I want to echo the comments of our own dear JP!  It's so true.  Once your treatments are behind you, things really change and almost get back to normal!  It's wonderful.  It seems like yesterday I was waiting for this and waiting for that...and worrying about this and worried about that.  Now, I'm on the other side and can't believe it finally happened..."This too will pass"...and IT DID.

Please do not give up or give in to depression or frustration if possible... but see if you can  project yourself ahead to when your treatments are completed. Before you know it...you too will be writing a note like JP and I.

Take care everyone.  I will pop in from time to time to see how my pink peeps are doing...I love you all.  Thank you for all your support.

I am off to Alaska (cruise) ...  leaving this Thursday.  Yahoo.

ttechred

Linda - cruise sounds like fun!  Can't wait to get on the backside of this - my reward trip is St. John US Virgin Islands.  Have a great, relaxing time.

Twirlmom1 - I live about an hour south of Houston.  Where are you going for you treatment?  I feel fortunate that I was sent to MD Anderson by my local surgeon.  They are moving things quickly, which feels good.  I wanted to start treatment the day I was diagnosed!  I had my first chemo Saturday.  I have 12 Taxol infusions followed by 4 FECs for a total of 24 weeks of chemo, followed by surgery.  What a journey!  Definitely not how I wanted to spend the summer.  I'm trying to plan some quick fun things for the week after school is out to make some memories with my daughters before I start to feel bad and possibly lose my hair. 

This board is a great place to lift your spirits.  There are so many courageous women who are getting through this and helping everyone else do the same. 

 Time for bed - chemo port insertion surgery at 8:30 a.m. tomorrow.   

Teka

ttechred,

I hope your chemo port surgery went OK.

arubajan05

Linda~ I am just so thankful for your positive posts!  I appreciate that you keep coming back here to encourage those of us who are just getting going in our treatments.!  I had Round 2 TC yesterday, rads coming up in the fall, and then tamoxifen for years.. LOL ... You make it seem like there is hope and an end in sight and I wanted you to know today how much you are appreciated.  ENJOY ALASKA!!!!!

Hugs!

jakhope

Hi Peeps-

Yes, Linda, have a great trip and thank you for your great posts, wonderful sense of humor, and all your words of encouragement. Keep in touch as I will too.

Hugs to all you brave women out there. This will be behind you too, some day soon too.

Love from GP Jeannie

KatieMom

Done, done, I'm done.  So zapped, so red, so done.

Katie 

jakhope

Yeah Katie!!!!! Congratulations. Enjoy! You will find all this free time.

KatieMom

Is anyone still here?  I need advice from you, my friends who understand.  I am a teacher and have made no secret of my bc to my colleagues and the parents of my students.  I teach second grade, so I feel it is totally inappropriate to tell the kids.  I did not have chemo so there was no change in my appearance and I got through treatment outwardly unscathed.  I was very clear with the teachers that I was not telling my students.  They all understood.  All the teachers wore pink on my last day of rads in support and celebration.  I was very touched.  The fifth grade teacher took it upon herself to tell her students why she was wearing pink.  Later that day I had many condolences and congratulations from the fifth graders.  I was shocked and angry that she let out my secret.  She heard that I was angry and didn't apologize, but said that one of her students had shouted it out and so she took the opportunity to tell them the truth.  I am still angry and almost embarrassed to have these kids coming up to me... I can't really describe the feeling.  I am shocked at her insensitivity to my wishes.  She will not actually apologize, just keeps telling me why she did that and saying that "she would never betray another teacher"  which she clearly did.  I have been smiling and telling the kids that my cancer is all gone and they don't need to worry.  They seem okay with it, but I can barely look her in the eye.  We are a staff of only 16 so I can't avoid her... an suggestions?  Am I just being pissy?  Am I being overly sensitive?  Will this stupid disease just go away and leave me alone?????

Katie 

dutchgirl6

I'm afraid that I can't give you any advice, Katie, but I will say that I am sorry that this happened to you,  You are not being overly sensitive or pissy.  Your colleague clearly crossed the line, particularly because you made it clear to the other teachers that you were not telling your students.  For her to tell her students, even though they are a bit older than yours and presumably more aware of these issues than the grade 2 kids, was a violation of your confidentiality, and I am sure that she could have handled it better when her student shouted it out.  I realize that you do have to take advantage of teachable moments when they present themselves, but surely there could have been another way.  I believe that she does owe you an apology, I hope that you get one.

In the meantime, the cat is now out of the bag, and won't go back in.  Just keep smiling and reassuring your students that you are ok.  One day this will all be a distant memory, and hopefully you and your insensitive colleague can enjoy a glass of wine together. 

Congrats on being done, done, done!

etk02038

Katie, I agree with dutchgirl. She does owe you an apology and you are not being over sensitive. Sometimes we have to take the high road and forgive and forget. Since this women is too dense to understand your feelings your anger will only hurt you not her.

perky

Katie,

I swear, some people can't stand not being the center of the universe for even a second. So if it isn't about her, she made it about her being the one to deliver someone else's story. What a jerk!

You sound like a class act in how you are dealing with this..

KatieMom

I knew I could count on you ladies, thanks a million.

Katie 

retrievermom

Katie:  I'm with you in feeling it inappropriate to bring up with small children and have been faced with a couple of awkward spots.  The neighbor family-- 4 kids ages toddler to 3rd grade--came over with parents, and the dad asked outright why I lost my hair and what kind of cancer did I have.  I guess the parents are better at deciding what their kids can handle than I am, but I was a bit taken aback.  Another friend's son (age 6) asked me sweetly, "what happened to your hair?" and I told him I'd been sick and the strong medicine had made my hair fall out, but it would grow back.  Didn't say cancer.  That seemed sufficient for him.

Since all the teachers wore pink, it was inevitable that kids, especially the older ones, would ask the teachers why.  Someone needed to have thought that one through.  

It seems it's gotten to be that when we want to be private about medical stuff, we are blamed and considered pissy, when others are being less than thoughtful.

LINDAGARSIDE

Hi Katie.  I'm sorry you've had to experience more frustration on top of all the other emotions you are facing each day.  That's a lot of you know what on your plate.  Bigtime bummer.

Perhaps we can turn this around to a teaching moment?  Usually we think of these opportunities to teach children but in this particular case, it's an adult and a colleauge.  It's ture that it's never too late to learn. 

I'm not an expert on this sort of thing, however I wonder what would happen if you called a staff meeting and thanked everyone for their support and then turn to the person who betrayed your trust and tell her that you appreciate that she was trying in her own way to show support and for that, you are thankful.  But you are surprised and concerned that she cannot see past her own ideas to accept the true feelings of her colleagues...in this case, you.  As a member of the team, you feel let down but because you are a teacher (and a darned good one at that) you are going to take this opportunity to demonstrate a lesson in humility.  Tell her that you forgive her.  Ask her to search her heart and to be careful as she will face many other times in her life where she will be faced with upholding someone's wishes or indlulging in her own theories.  The next time she is faced with this type of dilema, you hope she remembers the pain she put you through and that you hope she can use that as a source of strength to not give in to her own desires.  Wish her luck.  And then my dear, I believe you should forgive her and move forward and stand tall.  The others in the room will have learned as well...so a very important teaching moment for the teachers. 

My next step would be to tell your students (and yes, they know by now and some of them are to scared to say anything) that you are excited to use this opportunity to tell them that cancer doesn't have to be as scary as it sounds and there are many ways to beat the disease.  Use your fight as a demonstration of not giving up and showing courage.  Who knows how important this message might be for one of your students?

However you decide to handle it my friend...I wish you luck.  This isn't easy at all.  Here is a big cyber hug coming your way (((((((((((((((( KAITIE )))))))))))))))))

Ezscriiibe

Linda, I know you mean well, but I do not think it would be in  Katie's best interests to call the woman out in front of others, especially team members, peers, fellow teachers, etc, and especially if you are directing that, in front of these others that she say such things as "search your heart," or that she's concerned that the offender cannot "see past her own ideas."

That will immediately put the individual on the defensive and, well, it could get pretty ugly.

I feel extreme empathy for Katie because something like this (our diagnosis and our treatment journey) is so very personal. It's very easy for us to feel as though our personal territory has been invaded when someone speaks out of turn about our situation.

I do feel, however, that as soon as all team members showed up that day wearing pink, the trigger for the unauthorized release of information was depressed and the idea of keeping the information close to the chest was already doomed.

I do agree, Katie, that it will take some time to feel any level of trust for the co-worker again, especially given that she has yet to actually apologize, and has only made excuses as to why she did what she did.

Given a little time and space from the event, it may be possible for you to approach her down the road, person to person, when it's not still so raw for you, and let her know that it's the lack of apology that is upsetting to you. 

Hugs to you and I hope it is resolved sooner than later, but know that we all support you here!

Teka

Katie Mom,

Principal should have told the teachers not to wear pink.   Remember she went with you to one of your radiation treatments.

IsThisForReal

Hi everyone,

It took me long enough to find you!  lol

My story - 46 y/o, married with 2 non custodial step-kids.  Found my lump in Oct 2009 and it's been a roller coaster ever since.  Had a lumpectomy on 30/12/09 - so I'm hoping I will be considered as one of the Class of 2010.   

From there, the report came back 100% ER+, 50% PR+ and HER2+++, with extensive DCIS. Started TCH in March and have 2 more rounds to go, and will continue herceptin for the rest of the year.  

I'll be going for a BLM and hopefully a diep afterward since my rate of recurrance is very high - will need to consider rads - then - last but not least, I need to have my gallbladder removed - yikes!

Anyway - just wanted to say a big hello to everyone and offer encouragement.  This life is never boring is it?

IsThisForReal

.

KatieMom

I really appreciate all your help and time in writing it in.  Linda, as much as I would LOVE to call her out, I can't.  With such a small staff, it would be extremely uncomfortable.  Perky - you had it very correct in saying that she needs to be the center of the universe.  This was exactly her motivation.  It was evidenced today once again as her class put on a play and SHE was the star.  She wasn't on stage, but she certainly made it very clear what a good teacher she is by putting it on.  I think one of the reasons I am so taken aback by her secret telling is that I see a lot of myself in her.  I tend to want to be the center of attention.  I strive to be the best teacher and enjoy accolades.  This is kinda hard to admit, but bc does something to you in terms of coming clean with life  So my offense with her comes with a bit of self realization.  I would never betray a colleague, but I see easily why she did (for her own benefit and to look like the big wig).  When the incident gets along down the road I will talk to her and let her know exactly how it felt to be stared at by the 10 year olds while whispers of cancer can be heard.  I will be the strong one and smile and accept it.  Maybe others will learn from it.  I can be gracious.  Thank you, thank you.

Katie 

KatieMom

Oh jeez, sorry... IsThisForReal - welcome to the greatest bunch of friends ever.  

Andagain

Hi All,

I guess this is where I belong. I've been reading these boards a lot over the last 6 weeks and have been so touched by the shared strength and mutual support.

I'm 55, first diagnosis at 35  (it should have been 33 but they wouldn't believe me - mammogram/ultrasound negative) DCIS 1cm, resulted in left mastectomy and axillary strip. This time round, something "funny" with the nipple, Dr referred me, mammogram negative, found on ultrasound, biopsy, sentinel lymph node and right mastectomy. I'm waiting for the oncologist's appointment now.

 It sounds if knowledge and treatments have come a long way since 1990, but the basics remain. If something doesn't feel right get it checked, even if they don't believe you!

jakhope

Hi all-

Welcome newcomers and keep coming back.This is the greatest place for support, friendship and understanding.

Katie- I agree that all your fellow teachers wearing pink in your support, was the beginning of letting the cat out of the bag! It was a statement in itself. BUT!!!!  Privacy laws I feel are most important and NO should be telling anyone about our cancer to anyone, unless we ourselves are the ones doing the telling.

Linda- I hope you had a great cruise. Welcome back.

Hugs to all from GP Jeannie

perky

Greetings! Got a call yesterday and only have one thing to say about it..... SEVEN!!!!!

So relieved! I have read everything each of you has said and would have done the chemo if the onco score was in the grey area (but that doesn't mean I have to like it).

So back to business as usual, clean living and fills every Friday. I'm up to 360cc and the fills are starting to really hurt. I am hoping I don't have too far to go though.

Welcome to all newcomers. It doesn't matter what type, grade or, stage of cancer you have. It's cancer, it's scary and it stinks. Glad you are here, there are people that have experience and empathy who will get you through each step. They sure helped me and I will always be grateful!

mari-12

Hi All!!! Checking in to say hello. There always seems to be a lot happening!! 

Katie - I agree with Jakhope. I too work in a school and since I am a private person, I decided not to share my diagnosis until I knew what the course of treatment was going to be. Now I know and I will choose to speak to those with only positive thoughts and ideas. I will hold up my hand to those that do not get it! 

Thank you Jan, Ellen, Retrievermom and Linda for your excellent advice! Decisions do indeed come to you when you are well informed with trusted medical people, medical journals, family and the wonderful people on this site!

I'm 1 week post re-excision got clear margins!! Yea!!  I'm scheduled to begin chemo June 7th. Do you all feel like this is a roller-coaster ride??

A hugh THANK YOU to you all for being here. HUGS too!!!!