January Mastectomy
Comments
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Good Morning January Sisters! You are all in my thoughts and prayers every single minuet of the day.
Kim Hang i the and god luck withe the date for the exchange.
Becky- I am so sorry about your Grandmother... You know she is in a better p;ace and watching over you.
Laura- feel well., Take it easy and let your heart get stronger.... We are all routing for you....
To all my other Sisters.. Congrats on the exchange and the finishings...B e brave .. We can do this.
I had my exchange with only soreness. Saw PS and I don't have to see him for 1 month. Then we will discuss nipples and tattoo. I am very happy with the way I look. I do have a divot in my left breast... He says it is my muscle and only shows when I flex..... Not that I flex often. (HA HA)On the 4th I see on oncologist gynecologist... I am scared, but need to be brave. Just don't want to do anymore chemo... My hair is growing back VERY SLOWLY. Leave the wig at home now for work... I did get over that fear.. So wig-less in New City.
I just crack myself up... At least I can laugh.
Kat- You need to tell me what to expect for the nipple and why you need to wear the shield so long?
Sally-((( HUGS)))
Love you all,
Donna
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Robin-so good to hear from you! Sorry about the ankle-I had the same problem with my wrist years ago, and when they finally did an MRI, they found a hairline fracture. Not good. I hope the damage is minimal.
Debbie-thanks for another beautiful picture! Sand castles are amazing.
Good to hear from you too, Donna-it's been a while! Glad to hear your hair is coming in and you feel comfortable enough without your wig. I'll get there eventually-probably in a few months. My hair is growing in extremely slow...
Happy Sunday everyone!
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Donna: Great you can have a sense of humor. I think we all need to keep one!
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Just checking in
Kat I hope the unveiling gives you a big smile
Congratulations on exchange dates, and new squishies
Life is getting back into a "normal" rhythm... I've been teaching nature journaling when the weather allows. The last workshop was glorious...we had the most beautiful weather...80 degrees, light breeze and bright blue blue skies. Here's a link to my blog where you can see the farm where we went. http://jizogarden.blogspot.com/ This is a new blog so it doesn't have lots of my older entries on it but there is a link to my other blog on that page. More photos on http://www.flickr.com/photos/jizogarden/with/4846965777/
Here's my favorite shot of the workshop. This organic farm belongs to a friend of mine and is only 20 minutes down the road. It is a magical place.....like another world
Almost finished with my apple blossom painting....I'll share it when it's finished...it's fun to get back to watercolors....it's been a while.
Donna glad to hear your hair is coming back....hairless in NY...it's a perfect city for that
Glad you've had your exchange with little pain..I was lucky that way too Debbie fantastic sandcastle!!!!
Engagements, exchange dates, full lives......
Strength and healing ♥
Laura
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ps: I've joined a yoga group on this site...it is a small group but seems like a nice one
One of the ladies has produced a yoga video toward breast cancer, inspired by her mothers 22 year battle. I think I'll order it. I'll let you know how it looks. Here's her website http://www.yogaforcancer.com/Kat, Debbie and any of you wanting to add yoga into your recovery may enjoy the group..we share tips and encouragement...very low key
http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/58/topic/753869?page=2#idx_44xox
Laura
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Great picture, Laura-thanks for sharing!
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Laura, today being Tues was my personal-yoga session. LOVE it. We have decided that she think I am 'up' to attending the group class on Friday. This is a big hurdle for me, but I am willing to see if I can adapt the movements -- based on this individual sessions.
I looked at the video link...... I'll be eager to hear what you think of it.
My big concern with yoga is due to my LE issues & so I have to adapt things. Now, I have to create the space in my day to 'practise' what I have learned. [That has nothing to do with BC what so ever...... taking action on what I learn, always the challenge: where the rubber meets the road.]
Ever onward, team. Ever onward.
So glad that everyone is making effort to reclaim your lives -- one step at a time.
xx00xx00xx00xx
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Morning Ladies.
Yoga...humph! My daughter got a video and we thought we'd try it here first before we took it public with a group. Downward facing dog indeed! Thanks for the link Laura....I'm not sure if we're ready to go next door to the community center or not but at least we know what we're getting ourselves into. No easy feat...I commend all you Yoga buffs!
Nipples are great! They have already shrunk down to be flush with the skin which is fine with me. When I wear a cami you can't even see headlights which is also fine with me. My mom was asking me about them and I said the weird thing is they don't grow when I touch them! lol The incisions are healing well and I get my tattoos on the 20th....maybe I'll be done for a while? I hope so. I see the BS this Friday, the Oncologist the following Friday and then the PS on the 20th. I haven't had this many MD appts since this whole fiasco started. Hopefully I'll get clearance from all of them for 6 months.
Oh, and the fat grafting? So not worth it. The divots are back and so are the ripples. I would post a picture but I had to change computers and I lost my password. I hate to ask that gal for a new password since she's overwhelmed to begin with. Maybe after I get my tats I will.
Well, it's pouring down rain and I have to be in a golf outing in about 2 hours. It's the Rally for the Cure....I'm pretty excited about it. We have a team with group shirts and everything! One of the other gals is a 5 year survivior. I think the rain will probably stop...I think you always have a good rain when it's 100 degrees in the shade!
Have a great day girls~
Kat
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Morning glories or should I say Evening daisies
I have been gone for several weeks and see a lot has been going on with everyone. Summer seems to really busy time for me as well with the kids. I am happy to see many of us doing well, being done with chemo (woo hoo), getting exchange dates, nipples, etc... I too am sorry to hear about Becky's grandma {{hugs}} I think of you all daily and even though I have not met any of you face to face, I think of you as friends.
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Kat: Thanks for the fat grafting input. I sure appreciate it. As a uni, all those ripples and dimples are so obvious to me since I have a constant visual of what I should look like.
Lynbob: Good to hear from you. Glad you are busy with your kids. It's exciting that you can be active again!
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It's 4: 50 in the morning... So morning Ladies!.. Haven't been able to sleep.. Too much on the ind.. Went to the new Onco Gyno. I liked him very much. I will probably have the surgery at the end of next month. I heading for a complete hysterectomy, I figure I'n on Tamoxifen now so they just change me to Femara. Friday see the BS I will talk to her to see what she think, also my regular ONCO. To many appointment... Trying to get ready for the 2 oldest to get back to college... Where does all this money come from... When you are running out of it....????
My MIL is back in the hospital, and DH is not handling it well... She has MERSA from a blasting of kidney stones... My DU who is like a father to me is in the hospital for a anuism in the stomach and is 82. My DA who had ovarian cancer was doing well for a whole year. and now it is back in her node in esophagus. She is starting the chemo again tomorrow. Does it ever get better.... It makes you feel down all these elderly people you care about are struggling just to live....I feel good. Just mentally tired from all the pressure of all of them..
I am glad we are doing great as a bunch... Yes we have our bumps but we get up and fight again....Thanks for listening at this hour of the morning... What would I do with out you January Sisters.
Bless you.
Donna
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Gosh Donna, I think we have all had enough bad luck to last a lifetime! I hope your family will be ok.
My husband is having a hard time passing a kidney stone. They usually only take about 10 days but this one is lingering on that I encouraged him to get some pictures taken and see where it's at. They found a growth (cyst I"m hoping) on the opposite kidney 2.8cm the same size as my tumor! OMG! Anyway, I think it probably is a cyst and he has more follow up to rule out the dreaded C word. (not even speaking it)
So, here I am in denial, posting some pictures!
These are from the Rally for the Cure Golf Outing yesterday. Great great time! The photo with the carts...there were balloons on the carts of the survivors. The guy with the pink shirt carrying the clubs is a male breast cancer survivor...he's BRCA+ and is going through chemo now. He's wearing a LE sleeve too.
The next one is our foursome...the Pink Tigers! Left to right is Brenda, Kat (7month survivor),Lynn (13 year survivor) and Sherry. Lynn had a Left Mastectomy and had the LatDor flap and she looks awesome! She had her right side augmented so she has symmetry.
They raised a boat load of money for Susan G Koman and a great time was had by all! We only got rained on the first few holes!
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Donna and Kat, Sorry to hear about your husbands. I've heard that kidney stones are very painful! I hope they feel better soon.
The photos are great! How great you are up to doing this and getting active!
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Great pictures!! So sorry to hear all that's going on with some of you....life just keeps going and going, doesn't it? Doesn't take a break for any of us....
Now, it's my turn to post a picture....sporting my latest "add-on" .....
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I love seeing the pictures. I am excited that I finally got the day off for our local Komen walk in September. I agree that we and our families have certainly been through the ringer the last year.
I have still been having issues with lymphadema and finally got referred to a lymphadema therapist. I have never had the 'healing touch' massage but it really helped. I was surprised. She wants to see me twice a week to work out my kinks. This could take a while. lol. But after she worked on me my rock hard right implant felt softer and my arm not as ''full' feeling. I was thrilled. Hope for me yet!
I have been having some other issues lately. Not sure how it started but I have been have a lot of fluid retention. 22lbs to be exact. Doctor has me on lasix but I don't seem to going to the bathroom like they expect me to. So yesterday I was at the hospital for check on my kidney function. Doctor also did an ekg and said there was a change there that needed to be checked. So Tuesday I am scheduled for a dobutamine stress echo. My excitement never stops, lol. The lymphadema therapist says she can't do anything about a compression sleeve until the congestive heart issues are resolved. OY!
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Now for the explanation....My daughter had to put the picture on there for me
anyway, found out that the ankle I hurt on June 7th (at the amusement park, running to get on a ride with my kids) wasn't *just* sprained....after two doctor's appointments AND xrays AND an MRI on Wednesday, it was found there were *three* fractures....so, after a visit to an orthopedic doc this morning, I now sport a pink cast. I smiled for the pic, but am not really smiling now
It's *only* for a month...but I have crutches and a knee scooter. With lymphedema, I wanted to avoid crutches as much as possible. I will be crawling up and down the stairs, I think
- at least at my house, where we have two flights of them...sigh.But, my pink cast in honor of US!!!!!
Just so you know...blessings...robin
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Lynbob...bless your heart...it sure doesn't end, does it....will be keeping you in my prayers, sweetie
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Girls, Girls, Girls.
I go to work for a couple of days and the challenges just keep piling higher & deeper around here.
Heart ache galore.
Concerns and new tests and crutches and more new tests and finances and pets and children and family members and more tests.
Well we gotta just keep having the occasional rant or sob and then keep picking up ourselves and moving forward. Ya already know, the big girl panties and all that.
For those on our team interested in either yoga or yoga adapted for LE concerns, I have posted on my blog today, from my 30 year yoga teacher, who is 63 and a 5 year BC survivor. I've also put the pics under the LE thread specific to yoga.
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Back to thank Kat for the great photos of an event to support our 'entire' team. Thanks for the effort to support the entire BC community. It's so great to see such an enthusiastic turn-out.
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Thanks Debbie!
Robin, you look great even though you don't feel great. Love the pink cast!
Lynbob and Laura. I have been trying to do some research on the correlation between breast cancer and congestive heart failure. The only thing that consistently comes up is women who do get CHF as a side effect had rounds of herceptin. I will continue to research this because it is puzzling that mastectomies with implants have given two of our girls this complication. I see my Onc next Friday and I will ask her if I don't find the answer a head of time.
Saw my BS yesterday and I am cleared for a year! Whoohoo! She did a thorough node palpation and close up incision inspection and I am clear of any recurrence! Happy dancing in the streets!
Off to the clinic this morning with my DH and his flat plate CT of the abd/kidney's. Say a pray for him! I hope we get answers soon.
xoxo Team January!
Kat
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So my husband and I got in an argument last night, the kind where you say stuff that's been bothering you for a while, and he tells me how negative I am at this point even though I'm cured. WTH? I sure don't feel "cured". I feel like I had a bilateral mastectomy, 6 months of chemo, 4 more surgeries to go through, Tamoxifen for 5 years...and the big C still lingers over me. Maybe when I'm done with all my surgeries I'll feel more positive, but I'm not there yet. And I think I did surprisingly well with all the chemo-got a little down each time before I had to go in, but that's about it.
Also, I've got a PET scan scheduled for tomorrow which I'm happy about. I'm looking forward to an "all clear" from my oncologist.
I'm taking all my happy pills, but being naturally depressed, they seem to be just keeping me sane and not necessarily happy. My doctor told me that's normal for going through chemo and such-that the chemo messes me up chemically so sometimes they're not as effective.
Hmmm...I don't know how he wants me to act at this point, but I'm doing the best I can. Frustrating. He hasn't talked to me yet today and it's 1:30pm...oh well. Kinda funny actually.
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Robin: I hope your leg heals up quickly and you can get off crutches. I remember when DH broke his ankle and he did our stairs sitting down. It was a challenge, that's for sure.
Lynbob: I hope your issues resolve and you can get that fluid off. I know that can make a person feel miserable all by itself.
{{{burley}}}: I think our emotions pile up inside of us and unless you've had a serious illness yourself, you can't understand them. It's ok to cry and you need that release. I don't know if you've seen the thread on PTSD here. You aren't the only one who feels like you do, I can assure you.
I started my physcal therapy on Friday. My onco, DH and I, all thought it was my shoulder. We were wrong! It is my pec muscles. The therapist is someone who specializes with BC patients. She did some massage and I have several "exercizes" to do twice a day. I must say I was in tears during the session. I don't know if it was because of stress or emotion from the inability to do the simple things she asked me to do. She swears by mid-September I'll be able to raise my arm again and shave by myself though. If it works, I'll be compliant. It is the least awful thing I've had to do so far in this journey.
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Hi Team January!
I've been away on a camping trip and am just catching up.
There are so many challenges for Team January right now. I will add an extra prayer for all of you.
I am very concerned about Cathy. Has anyone seen her on any other thread or FB?
Paula....hello, are you out there?....you went away to your son's wedding and disappeared....
NeverSurrender !
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Kim, You have been through so much.....SO much more than I have, and we hope and pray you're out of the woods, but the roller coaster ride is far from over. Some people just don't "get" it, and it sounds as if your hubby is one of them, or he, himself, is in denial. That is truly the way my brother was when our daddy died. I know it's a different set of circumstances, but both guys are handling their "grief" in the same way.....telling us to "get over it, already".....sigh. No empathy bones in their bodies. (and my brother is a DOCTOR!!!!) I hope you have someone in your life close by who *does* get it and allows you to be you...if you don't, maybe you can have your onc refer you to a behavioral oncologist....just to have someone you can *really* talk to - more than just your online buddies here. We're great and all, we know
, but nothing can beat having a real, live person with you.....I'll be praying extra for you...You know, I think life just is going on and on for all of us....and is taking us all in different directions now. Our paths converged and met in January with our common bond of BC....and we are still holding tight to the bonds that are tight! But stuff keeps happening, and will continue to happen. And just as with our in-person friendships, we will share the happiness and joys with each others, and also share the sorrows, cares, and concerns with each other. It almost seems too bad that life just couldn't be good and great for all of us from here on out, you know??? But we were never promised that, I guess....
So to all of Team January....just know that you ALL continue to be in my thoughts and prayers...
School is starting up for me....today was the teacher's first day. I meet my students for the first time next Monday, as I'm only teaching on MOndays and Tuesdays. I homeschool kids #2 and #3. It will be a memorable experience handling 40 minute music classes with a cast....ha!
Blessings to all....robin
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bcincolorado
PTs are miracle workers. Keep stretching
Mine actually wants PS to send patients to them two weeks after surgery. She still has to convince some that it's okay. -
Dear Team January,
So glad you are still there...like a safe port in a storm. I postponed my nipple recon to visit DH in Syracuse. Spent 4 weeks there. Came back to TN and realize that I am miserable in both places. BC left me with an urgency to enjoy life....and that's not happenin'.
I am fighting as hard as I can to remain active and get involved in things, but finances are a struggle now with DH's job only being part-time and temporary. I also realize that he so doesn't get it. The big question, better to be alone or try and live with someone who brings you down? Think I instictively know that answer. So tired of having to take care of everyone else.
Turned 63 two days ago and celebrated the fact that I was alive!! but the day was truly awful....DH sent a b'day card and I had to pay 17 cents postage due! My oldest son and daughter-in-law sent flowers, but I didn't hear from my other two children until later the next day and my mother didn't call either! I am tired of making excuses for all of them. I am trying to get on with my life.
The real estate market is bad here and I finally took the house off the market. Am going to try to make the best of it here in TN even though there is absolutely no family here. I have some great neighbors and I am going to make a real effort to find some exciting things to do. I need to get a job and a purpose back in my life.
Yesterday I played golf with my best friend here. We ran into 4 of the girls that I used to play with before BC. Two of them had sent cards and actually brought me dinner and visited after the surgery....the other two never even acknowledged that I had cancer and I hadn't seen them since before my dx. One of them came in after golf and was checking scorecards (or something). She looked at me and said, "your boobs look good.....are they bigger now?" I was absolutely stunned!!!! Talk about ignorant and insensitive. I swear I am going to write a book!!! I don't understand how people can say the things they do. It's bad enough when people say nothing....I think I understand that they just don't know what to say. But saying something so ridiculous as that is just inexcusable. My friend who was sitting there looked at me later and just shook her head and said, well, that was way off base!
Going to try and find a pcp who I can talk to about hormone levels and Arimidex. I still can't believe that everyone just gets the same dosage. I may try and experiment on my own. I still think that nasty little pill is causing some of the depression....going to talk one every other day and see what happens.
Anyway, I am so glad you are all there and I can rant to ears that listen and minds that understand! Kat, the pic's were great and the shirts were awesome!!! The golf course seems to be my only refuge, and funny thing when I went to Syracuse I played with some of my former golf buddies up there and had a blast. Nothing like a round with the girls and a cold beverage after....but playing with DH was horrible----he can't just have fun, has to be a "teacher" on the course.....I wish I had married Joe the plumber!!!
I do pray for all of us and think of Team January all the time. Yes life does go on. I guess we thought we might be entitled to a free pass on all the other crap after dealing with BC.....NOT! They say that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger....maybe we had to endure the BC to get stronger to deal with all the other crap? Life ain't fair....I know it....we all know it. Just some days are a little tougher to deal with than others.
I will keep on keepin on and find the way. Love you all.
Marianne
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Marianne! Big hugs coming your way from AZ. Sorry you are dealing with depression-I deal with it too, and my happy pills just don't seem to be working right now-the chemo has messed me up chemically. I think you had said you didn't want to take any medicine? It honestly can help-maybe you can revisit the idea. Sorry your hubby is being a drain on you emotionally-that can't be easy with everything else you're going through. Again, big hugs from AZ and I'm saying a prayer for you right now.
My most recent insensitive comments would be from my work buddies who think I should have gotten bigger boobs. "Are they still injecting them?" "I thought they would be bigger." "Are you even any bigger than before?" Really? Gimme a break. Shut up about my boobs already. It's not like I talk about your boobs! I should start thinking of some witty comeback everytime someone asks about my boobs...I'll have to work on that.
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How about - at least these aren't trying to kill me
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We interrupt these concerns, frustrations, agonies, challenges and upsets.........
Must share my twinseez. They cut his curls off, shortly after I reported that you dearies thought that they were both girls. LOL
Now he's all boy & she's all girl.
Here's their big brother, Wonder Boy, now all boy at four, after riding lessons:
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Kudos Claire! I always did like that line.
So good to 'see' you Marianne! Do you have any ideas of what you want to do with your career? You're so fabulous at research you might find your Onc or BS are good places to start!
I guess I'm a little different than most women...I don't care who makes comments or what they say. I had one women tell me "You got new ta ta's? I want new ta ta's" and my reply was 'not like this you don't!" I even had to tell my sister "Don't put that out in the universe! You do not want them like this!" I think people aren't sure what to say and they are uncomfortable and that makes them lose their filter. I'm fine with it and I'll show women (in private) anyone who wants to see them. When I was first diagnosed, the gal doing my mamo told me she had a BMX with reconstruction and she showed me that day. I was so relieved. I knew I could get through this. I promised myself if it will help other women than I will do that too!
I'm sorry our team is having depression...and there are so many of us that aren't around anymore and that saddens me a little bit. I can understand though...I think we think that if we don't visit the site that BC will just go away. (And, it some ways, it has! I had to hold my new boobs when I ran across the living room the other night just like I used to so the jiggling would be kept to a minimum! WoW!) Visiting or re-visiting either conjurs up the memories that we would just as soon forget...but our lives have been touched by each other and that will never change! I have cut waaaay back on my bco usage. For example, I don't visit any of the other forums...I'm just too wiped at the end of the day and I can't keep up with the threads and that causes me a lot of stress. So, for the past few months I only come to Team January. You're like my safe haven in the storm!
One storm we've been riding out is this problem with my DH and his kidneys. After 2 CAT scans and one ultrasound the verdict is in. The good news is the 2.8 cm 'growth' is a cyst! Praise the Lord! The bad news is, he's full of cysts on both kidneys...and renal calculi! Stones in both sides but only one 'obstructing' and decsending down the left ureter...pretty good size too but just not moving. So, we head to the urologist on Friday and get the low-down on our next steps. Of course he's refusing any type of surgery (hehehe) but that's what he's saying now so we'll see what they say on Friday.
Well, I hope you all have a wonderful peacful evening with sweet dreams to all of you!
Kat
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