The dumbest things people have said to you/about you

camillegal

Scottie---hahaha--That's how I figure it--it really helps the less stress on me--so I say what I want anytime. LOL

Scottiee1

I do the same thing now because of BC and the fact that I am 65 now.....say what I like, do what I like and good luck to anybody who gets in my way......lol

camillegal

Scottie I'm older so I've started this right around te time I was DX'd LOL

Scottiee1

Love it.....it's so "freeing"

blackcat2012

Merry Christmas!!!

Jubby

Ok, I have a good one........ At Christmas lunch yesterday, a distant relative told me that HRT would help me battle the effects of menopause from chemo & tamoxifen. Der, I am 40 years old and the whole reason I will be entering menopause is to shut down the hormone production. People try to be kind and reassure you the only way they know how but I did have a little chuckle to myself over this - imagine taking tamoxifen and HRT!!

Racy

Jubby, that person should think about getting off HRT if she's on it. You could have said 'actually, it is well known that HRT is a cause of bc'. She may have choked on her turkey!

Racy

Hey Jubby, just saw you are in Melbourne. Hi from Brisbane!

Jubby

Hi Racy,

Hope you've enjoyed a nice Christmas in Sunny Brissie. My mum and brother actually spent Christmas in Brisbane this year. We are defying the odds here in Melbourne and enjoying beautiful weather. Even with newly diagnised BC, good weather puts you in a better mood. And yes, I know HRT is actually pretty lethal for BC but I let it slide...... some people think they know everything

trailertrash

I have a well-meaning friend, who is very into natural treatments, food, herbs, organic, etc. She posted (or facabook posted for her) a site that says how chemo causes cancer to recur. I was so sorry to see that posted, b/c 1)it's BS and 2) might scare people away from something that would save their lives.

camillegal

Trailer----Just a few people would really think like that--most people will run to a Dr. and find out how to get rid of it and listen to te Drs. I'm sure she's coming from a place where she believes, but at this point no alot believe that--not that nutrition and things migt elp but with a combination od medical devices.

trailertrash

Oh. Em. GEEEE!!

Shrek4

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Anonymous

Trailertrash:  What you said sounds familiar i.e., I have a relative who thinks all ailments can be helped or even cured with a miracle drink she mixes up each day.  I'm sure it probably does help her with some issues, but I hate it when people think they are the last word on everything.  She also is constantly sending me links to website articles that tell me how worthless cancer treatments are.  I do agree with some of it, especially considering how many people recur.  But we just have to hope there will be reliable, effective treatments more than just the status quo.  Happy New Year and MANY MORE MY FRIENDS!

Ikari

I am so sick of people asking me my "prognosis"  - especially when my daughter is standing next to me!!!  I have been itching to find an appropriate response to this question and it has remained elusive until today.

Today when asked, I asked back "what do you mean?"  

She stumbled and said "um, ah.... did they get it all?"

I could have been really nasty and said back "thats not what prognosis means"

but I didnt...   this time

"

NativeMainer

Good one!

trailertrash

A well-meaning (but uninformed) visitor yesterday asked me if I thought the mammograms (I've had, maybe, 4) caused the cancer.

Shayne

I had my sister call and tell my mother about my dx-she lives in another state.  She asked my sister if i got BC because i breastfed my daughter for three years.  Not the dumbest thing I heard so far.

Annie62

Wow, this thread has really quieted down. Time to revive it I think!

I haven't had a really stupid thing said to me in a while but here goes. I was in the hospital for over a week and spent a couple of months recoveirng from fluid around the heart and lungs. I'm now on disability but went in for the office holiday party in December. I lost quite a bit of weight during my hospital stay. ONe of my male coworkers loudly told me how great I looked with the weight loss in front of the whole office. I just smiled even though I wanted to say "Oh yeah, a hospital stay caused by cancer is great for my figure." Sigh.

shawntez

Hi all! Sorry to see that stupid is universal.

My ex-BF told me it's just BC then proceeds with, "You're a strong woman, you'll be fine, but I have COPD and a bubble on my lungs....blah, blah blah.  I called to tell this man that I have breast cancer and to make certain that he is extra supportive and sensitive to our son, and I get this capital BS bull! I wanted to slap his ass through the phone. Insensitive neanderthal! He's talking about a condition he has had for the last 4 years and keeps smoking, stupid ass!!!! Mine is worse than yours  dumbass!!!! (talking about his thougt process, not my having BC as worse)

Wow that felt great!

barbe1958

GREAT rant shawntez!!!!!!! 

gemini4

Shayne, I breastfed my daughter for three years -- thought it would be my ticket to cancer-free breasts! Unfortunately not the case. But who knows, maybe kept it from being worse?



My recent chuckle came from a gal I know in my community. We are acquaintances more than friends, but still friendly if that makes sense. She was so flustered when she heard what I'm going through -- she neatly tied up the conversation with, " well, you're a survivor now, so that's great." (3 months after dx -- lol!)

Anonymous

When a friend heard that I was going to have a hysterectomy and then go on a medicine (AI) to hopefully supress any other estrogen in the body, she said "so will you be like a man now?"  WHAT?!?  No, I'll be like every other woman who goes through menopause.   What was she thinking? 

Anonymous

nbnotes .... huh, a friend? Some comments you overlook as honest mistakes but thats NOT one of them ...

Rowan47

Similar comment made to me by BS nurse when she was draining fluid from BMX wound, "You're just like a man now". Rather insensitive, I thought. I did tell her that that wasn't a nice thing to say, and she....laughed!!!!!

Anonymous

Laughed? WOW, Guilty or nervous or mocking (joking)? Whatever the case she should have been rapped over the knuckles for that. What a dumb thing to do.

kaza

Some friend   ,,,,,,

Leah_S

Rowan, I wouldn't put that comment under "dumb things people said". I'd put it under "extremely nasty and insensitive things people said".

Leah

Edited for typos. Again.

gemini4

Wow, Rowan, that's appalling a *nurse* would say that! Unbelievable. :-(

Anonymous

I'd put it under "extremely nasty and insensitive things people said".

Wonder if we need a title change, cuz lets face it some if not most of these things are just plain out cruel, and Rowan, youre not alone in the SLACK NZ system and the way some of the staff with their appalling bed side manner addresses you. Some give raving reports but some of us know different. I'd encourage anyone to complain. She needs to apologize. Even if its not genuine, I reckon just to get them to hear it come out of their own mouths does them good.