MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

Kay_G

Wow is this ever an active thread! I got my power back mid afternoon on Sunday. Duchess, I had surgery ( uni mx, diep and nodes removed) on 8/17. I finished chemo 3 weeks before surgery so I was told it would take longer for me to heal. I was doing a lot better each day, but seem to be stuck where I am now for a while. We can be recovery buddies!

It is funny about the organic stuff. I used to think it was all garbage, but have become a believer. Read the Anti Cancer book and it made sense to me. It's hard to say why I got cancer, but I do think stress and environmental factors played at least a part. I agree that moderation and good eating habits are important. Just quitting diet coke and fast food burgers and fries are a big step for me. Also eating more veggies. The organic is on top of that, but I only do it for the most polluted products. I feel like I am becoming a tree hugger which is so opposite of what I used to be, but some of the things I read in Anti cancer book really made sense to me, so I am doing what I can. I will even change the way I vote I think. We'll see. I like the changes I've made though. I hope I will keep it up when cancer isn't as much on my mind as now. Just my opinion. Everyone has to do what is right for them. I think if my cancer weren't at a later stage and as aggressive as it is, I probably wouldn't have read the Anti Cancer book.

Foxlairfrm

I can't catch up on everything here but Paula I would be SO pissed! I can't believe someone would lie about their stage of cancer. I think I would call her out on it. I just wouldn't be able to help myself and you are a better person than I for not doing it! Unbelievable what people will do, it still ceases to amaze me and it shouldn't as old as I am now. Lol since this group is SO old.

Power restored last night about 8. Thank goodness DH was getting ripe.

Have a good day ladies

Foxy

Paula66

Its good to see your safe and sound.  You have been on my mind, foxy. 

Scuba_duchess

Thanks Kay, will look for the book, my sister (IDC in 2008 with chemo and MX may have it, but sometimes I feel like I am forcing her to relive her entire process, not fair!



Feeling good today, back to BS this am and all okay. See PS on Wednesday along with PT. Dou t last 2 drains will be out. One day at a time, am happy for the good things.

Cheers

Paula66

I know the feeling duchess.  One drain got to come out after a week but the other one had to stay in almost 2 weeks.  Showering with them both was a choir but I managed.  I was always worried that I was gonna pull them out until I saw how long they really were.  Good Luck. 

SAB

Mostlymom, I had a similar experience with biopsy.  Not enough lidocaine, marker inserted in the wrong spot, lots and lots of bruising.  When it came for my wire loc they tried to schedule me with the same Doc!  I had to call my nurse navigator and she changed my practitioner.  He did a perfect wire, and had the original doc stand there and watch (and also catch a glimpse of my still bruised boob and scalpel "nick" scar.)  A bad memory for sure, but it's over and maybe the doc learned something that will help the next patient.

Meece

I am having such a difficult time keeping up with this thread. I am off for 9 days and I have 23 pages that I have missed!  By the time I catch up, another 23 pages will have been posted.  I can't be on line as much as I used to. 

Soooo I just stopped by before plunging into catching up on my reading, to say hello and to welcome any newbies.

Sherryc

Hautie you are so lucky to have a prior relationship with your BS.  I respect my BS and do believe that she is great surgeon.  I was just upset that she did not lay my options out for me and took it upon herself to make the decisions.  I would much rather her have laid it out and then tell me what she believed I really needed to do.  That was the way my MO handled it.  He told me what he felt I needed but if I wanted the other he would respect my decision but did  not believe I needed it.  I guess I have some control issues myself.  Of course sometimes there are no choices, but in my case there were.

Kay I also read the Anti Cancer book and it made me start thinking differently as well. 

Hauntie

Sherry - I completely understand. Had my BS not already been someone I knew and trusted., I would have wanted her to lay out all the possiblities and let me make my own decision, Actually, she did mention lumpectomy - she had treated my mother with lumpectomies during both of her bouts with BC, but she knew that for me lumpectomy was not an option. She also took the lead in making sure I got the most agressive treatment with both chemo and radiation. Looking back, I'm so greatful I had someone I trusted completly to make these tough decisions for me. However, there were times, during the treatment when I was angry and felt powerless and without choices. Even now, sometimes, in dealing with the side effects of all the treatment, I wonder if the treatment was too aggressive. I did finally learn, with the help of my therapist, that I always had/have choices. I can always ask questions, seek a second opinion and say no to whatever is being recommended. I wish I had learned this lesson earlier in life, never mind earlier in BC.

I have a dear friend, who is a 20 year stage 4 Hodgkin's survivor. We used to talk about having a non profit business, where we could be/have a staff of expert patient advocates who would accompany the patient through her cancer journey - asking all the right quesions, gathering all the information and making recommendations based on a patient's personal needs, wants, etc and not necessarily what the medical establishment said was standard protocol or what studies have shown etc.

jo1955

Hauntie - I too felt angry at times during treatment.  My BS & MO are both great,  They laid out my options for me and let me make decisions on my own.  I did allow my BS to coordinate my rads and my MO is now my "one stop doc".  He sets up all my follow up appts with the exception of my family doctor - I take care of that one.  I had no clue whatsoever as to what questions to ask and things moved very quickly for me.  For example, from dx to surgery was 10 days.  Not much time to think about anything and that may have been just as well.  I do not regret any decisions I have made and sure know so much more about breast cancer.  In fact, tomorrow is my one year cancerversary. When I thought about it yesterday, I did not know what to make of all this, but today, I am okay with it. 

Paula66

Hi all! I was very luckey that I had a BS I could trust.  He too stayed on top of things.  He made for sure I understood my options.  I'm so glad I listened to him and I did what he suggested as far as the BRCA testing went.  When I found out I had cancer again I was just going to have a lumpectomy.  Since this was the 2nd time for BC I followed his advice on the testing due to my family history. End the end I deceided to have both of them removed.  Im so glad I did.  Not only did I have the IDC, there was a spot that was DCIS and I had Pagets disease of the Nipple.  I showed no symptoms of that so we were both shocked.  My Onc is a good one too.  She will take the time you need with her and will lay it out for you on paper.  Plus she understands what its like to have BC and that was a plus.  She started her journey just before I started mine.  There was no way I wanted to see my sissys Onc because of a few issues I had with him.  I dont care for how he handled my sissy the 2nd time she had BC, but she loves him and thats her choice not mine.

(((JO)))) Im glad your doing better!  

jo1955

Paula - I see the same MO and my DH.  Not only is he really good he is also real good to look at.

Decided I needed to put my "big girl panties" on and get off the pity pot.  I am look at this like birthdays - I don't celebrate them anymore.

Thanks Paula 

Paula66

Jo I know we are so full of emotions as we go thru this, I do know that sometimes Ive pulled my big girls panties up so much, that I get a wedgie sometimes.  You go girl!

Its good you get some eye candy when you go to the Mo Jo.  Luckey duck.  The only hottie I get to see is the cup of joe that I have while Im waiting.

jo1955

Paula - Both my BS and MO are hotties - don't know how I got so lucky.  Even though my DH and I have the same MO, I have made sure we don't get seen at the same time - can you guess why??? LOL!  I will second that on the wedgie - boy, it doesn't feel good some days does it?

barbe1958

Janis, having no node involvement has nothing to do with a mastectomy!! I had three lumpectomies previously and they were very concerned about my right breast. The cancer was found in my LEFT breast at 6 o'clock on the chest wall right over my heart. I certainly couldn't risk radiation!!! So, I elected for a bliateral mastectomy. Sure enough my right breast had ADHP and was moving right along to cancer formations. My surgeon said I made the right call BEFORE I had my surgery - easy to say afterwards..

If you're unsure, ask your surgeon what he'd recommend for his wife or mother.

Cancer travels through the intermammary lymph nodes and your bloodstream. NOT just the underarm lymph nodes. So many women get excited with no nodal involvement, but it just doesn't mean much except an adjustment of treatment.

tinkertude

Barbe1958... thats exactly what i asked my radilogist that called me back and read the mammo. I said if it was your wife what would you tell her to do", he said I would say get this biopsied right away!.. I love that approach and have used it several times with my doctors.

justmejanis

barbe...basically I think I knew that, but still get confused easily apparently.  I have read so much about BC, my head is still spinning.  I did however ask my docs that very question.  Guess that is why I am on the course I am on.

 I have such a headache tonight and not feeling the best.  Going to lie down and ice the back of my neck.  Hope everyone is having a good evening.

jo1955

Janis - Sending gentle hugs - hope you get to feeling better soon.

                  

Hauntie

Jo - Evidently you haven't read about DISH (Damn  I'm Still Here!) Status. It's a way of marking your years since diagnosis. I "borrowed" it from a breast cancer list serve I belong to. There are multiple levels of membership. Being 10+ (almost 18) years out from diagnosis I have proudly attained the DISH Platinum Level. Every level has its own rewards and privileges.

Since you've reached your 1 year cancerversary you are eligible for DISH-LITE status, MITT level. An explanation of your new status and its rewards and privileges follows:

"** For those who have celebrated one year since diagnosis, the MITT
Level ("Made it through treatment!") New MITT's will receive new
fingernails, 10 free psychotherapy sessions, a selection of travel
brochures from our very own Don't Wait Another Day Travel Associates,
and a complete set of new friends. " - Musa Mayer

Congratulations on your hard earned DISH-LITE Status, MITT Level

Janis - get some R&R and feel better soon.

jo1955

Hauntie - I accept my DISH-LITE Status, MITT Level with honor.  It has been on heck of a year and the best part of it was I did make a lot of new and wonderful friends.  Thanks for this award. 

KittyGirl2011

Hi Everyone,  I've been busy with work again.  Back two days now and it seems to be going okay.  I expected to be more tired than I am and almost feel guilty that I'm not.  I do feel your pains in my heart for those of you who are not feeling up to your best lately.  Maybe I've been lucky or just not gotten to the wall yet, either way I'm here to give my support and love to those in need.  Hugs all around and I'm in this with you!  Kitty

Hauntie

I've slept off and on for most of the past 2 days. I felt good enough to go to my regular Monday Girls' Night for the first time since surgery. I'm tired and will probably head to my recliner shortly. I have an 8 a.m. appointment with my PCP to discuss why seem to be retaining so much fluid since my sugery. After that I am seeing my BS. Please, keep your fingers crossed that the other drain comes out and that the dreaded binder be forever banned. 

My biggest discomfort, right now, is an intense burning sensation, in my skin, on the upper part of my chest. It feels exactly like a very bad sunburn. The area isn't hot or pink. Without regular doses of pain meds, the skin is so sensitive, I can't stand to have anything touching it. I'm sitting here, topless, right now. (Nobody peek.) Also, my underarm, on the side of the surgery, feels like I have severe razor burn. I don't remember if I had these sensations/pains after my first MX. Initially, both of these areas were very itchy. I'm thinking it's probably nerves that were disturbed during surgery. Benedryl cream helps, on my other mastectomy side, when I feel the itch I can't scratch. Anyone else ever felt that? I'm going to try it and see if that calms this down.

tinkertude

Hauntie.. es the unscratchable itch! i had a bilat and sometimes the itch drives me nuts. I always wonder how can something that is numb itch so darn much!

I will be hoping and praying you drains come out. That was a huge turning point for me after surgeries made a huge difference. Hope you feel better and I didnt even peak!!!! 

cmbear

Jo-- an award winner! Can I have your autograph? Janis-- sounds like you need a massage-- that always helps my headaches. : ) Hauntie that does sound like nerve issues. I wish I had the answer for you. You might want to reach out to your doc. You are lucky to have a doctor you trust and respects you. Wish I had that with mine.

Internet still on the fritz-- and I am not so good typing on my I phone. Fat fingers!!!

Ladies do have a good night! Let's hope this week doesn't bring us any more earthquakes or hurricanes or floods or fires or any other disaster !!'

tinkertude

ILL second that Claire!

reesie

Praying for removal of the drain Hauntie so you can recover for Monday!

KittyGirl2011

Hauntie - Really hoping that itch goes with the drain.  Sending you some soothing cooling hugs.

Hauntie

I tried the benedryl trick. It doesn't seem to be helping. The only thing that seems to help is pain killers. If I don't find a way to calm this down, before I leave for NY/NJ, I'll be driving topless (and I don't mean the roof of the car). Seeing both my PCP and BS fomorrow, maybe one of them will have a solution.

reesie

Haha E sometimes I think it would be nice to bite some people's fingers off.

SAB

Happy cancerversary to Jo, who celebrates by making the journey better for others!  Thank you Jo.