Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
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Carole....so glad your foot is doing well! Count me among those that love your pretty toe nails. I had not had a pedicure until last year. I never liked anyone touching my feet but my friends talked me into going as a group and having one done. Then I was hooked. However, I got a nail fungus from there....and it was a pretty nice pedicure place and I've just recently lost the nail on my big toe. This could only happen to me. Now I'm attempting to get rid of the fungus and it appears that is not an easy task. Continue to rest that foot and before you know it, you'll be swinging that golf club again! :-)
Thinking of you mommarch and hoping you're doing o.k.
Hi termite...so good to see a post from you. I've missed you. So what crochetting project are you doing?
Sandra...Hugs to you! Thanks for explaining Mike's situation. This would test the patience and emotional fortitude of anyone. Be sure to take some time for yourself because you need to stay healthy and strong.
Jackie....we had sunshine today!!!!! YAY! I did get my flowers planted but still have one big area that needs to be weeded. The rain has kept me out of there but if I don't get in there this week and get out those weeds, the weeds will be taller than the plants!!!
I hope everyone is having a good week!
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Morning gals! Minus, I went to that link, and saw a lot of good information.... My Doc seems to be stuck on the idea, that Lymphedema only affect your arms... and that my leg/ankle swelling is Edema...
Sandra, yes... the picture of the arm, looked like my foot, and ankle... It had just gotten worse, and no matter how much I walked, or elevated it, the compression was the only thing that worked.
But bottom line is, the treatment is the same... Just the compression sleeves for arms, and stockings for legs... And Jackie, yes, I never paid attention to maybe some were stretched out.... I wash them by hand, but still, maybe they did stretch....
They DO make different degrees of compression.... But the one I have on now, is still holding things in place... My foot looked like it just went into my leg... no ankle... just a swollen blob of puff! But I couldn't believe how putting on that one stocking just squeezed it all back into place! I'm afraid to take it off now!
Someone said they can't get them on? I KNOW!!! But I bought a "Donner".... that is the only way I can do them myself!
This is like the one I have... And once you get the hang of it, .... It is very easy! I think there even instructions on YouTube.
Sometimes we just gotta figure out things for ourselves.... Doctors only know so much... that's why they send us to specialists.... I guess.
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Oh my goodness, Sandra, that photo scares me. I hope I don't develop that. When we made the long flight to Australia in 2014, dh and I bought compression socks online. And during the flight, I was up and down to the toilet and exercised my ankles and feet. Still I got some swelling in the ankles. But on the return flight, when we (four of us) reached Los Angeles, we elected to walk quite a long distance to a connecting airline in the airport instead of catching a ride. The walking must have helped because I didn't get the swelling. But wearing those compression socks was tiring! It felt so good to strip them off! I haven't worn them since but dh wears them when playing golf in the cold weather. He has more problems at this point with ankle and foot swelling than I do.
It's so humorous to have my tiny little toenails complimented! My first pedicure was 7 or 8 years ago when dh gave me a gift certificate to a salon for Christmas. This was a pricey place. I go to the economy salons that are staffed by Vietnamese employees. But Rita's toe fungus story has me concerned. I always apologize for my teensy toenails and joke that the salon worker needs a magnifying glass. When I do attempt to paint my own toe nails, I paint the whole end of the toe. I inherited my skinny feet from my dad. My mother has short wide feet. Needless to say, in this world of medium width shoes, I had a lot of trouble finding shoes that were narrow enough back in the days when I wore panty hose.
I pick a pretty coral color polish because it's bright and cheerful. For my fingernails, I go with a natural polish. It never lasts long but the polish on the toe nails lasts a couple of months before getting chipped. It's fun to have colorful toe nails and we have to grab fun wherever we can find it.
No complaints but here I sit while dh is off at the gym. The breast surgery in 2009 was much more of a challenge and I got through that.
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Oh? So now you not only have cute little toes and nails, you also have SKINNY feet? While the rest of us have goose feet? Hah? I mean I have wide feet! Short toes, but they hold me up.... more or sometimes less...
AND, if that's not bad enough, I have a hammer-toe on my left foot! ALONG with everything else that is going on down there!
I was going to post a picture of what THAT looks like, but never mind..... Now I'll go sulk.... and ponder all of my um..... foibles....
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That's OK, Chevy. You and I can have ugly feet together! :-) Can you believe that I was told to put Vick's Vapor Rub on my toe fungus and on all the skin around it? I have been doing that faithfully twice a day but haven't seen much change in it. Today I went to the vein specialist for a consultation on my vericose veins. My left leg is much worse than my right. The main valve on the vein is not working properly and I got to see that in the ultrasound. I know that I'll feel so much better if I just go ahead and have the surgery, but the laser procedure sounds pretty ugly. I have to make my decision and then get right back in for a measuring session so that it can be submitted to insurance. Then I am suppose to wait 12 weeks and try the stockings during that time before insurance will cover the procedure. I can understand where they try to go the less invasive route first but I did try the stockings several year ago and they didn't do too much for me. Anyway, the actual procedure wouldn't happen until September. Decisions.....anyone had the laser procedure where they thread the wire and laser up the outer vein in the leg?
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I just know years ago, my Aunt had terrible veins.... She finally had surgery, but they came back....! I don't know much about that.... I don't have any veins showing, or problems, or even pain in my legs.... just the one ankle/foot/leg swell up beyond recognition.... Ha!
But when I broke my hip/femur over a year ago, and they had all that "stuff" in there.... The titanium utensils, screws, etc, and the drains and needles that were attached, it's no wonder that my leg didn't fall off.... Ha! I finally just quit telling them to please not use that side for the blood-pressure, IV's and what-ever else I don't remember..... But that's when I started really having a LOT of trouble.... Same side as my BC.... but it was only a Lumpectomy....
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DH and I signed a contract for installation of solar panels on our roof. He was more in favor of it than I was but I went along since the out-of-pocket expense is greatly reduced by a state rebate and federal tax writeoffs. When you're our age and it takes 4 or 5 years to start seeing any benefit, you have to wonder whether it's a good gamble. I always figure money in my pocket is best left there! DH used to tell people that my version of banking was deposits only.
Otherwise, not much happening around here. That's a good thing. I'm icing my foot and putting in time in my reclining chair.
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Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them; but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight. When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another. -Helen Keller
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Carole - I like the "deposits only" mentality. My ex-DH believed if there was any money left at the end of the month, WHEE it was "free" and he could spend it. I believed it was a miracle that we could save for a new fridge or maybe carpet or a new roof. Needless to say it made for in-harmonius month end discussions until I learned to keep $1000 in the bank that was not listed in the check register. Of course there was no such thing as banking on line so it worked like a charm.
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Minus, I had a tricky thing with the check book register that made it look like we had less money than what was actually in the bank. Worked pretty well, but now there's online.
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Hmmm, so many people ( of course I thought I was pretty much the only one ) who has a better half that "flunked" money for the most part. There was a time when he was passable, but in these latter yrs. I finally had to take back over bill paying. He has never been truly good at it --- but since we moved back home 17 yrs. ago, he got especially difficult. If we/he needed anything he would just go and get it -- period. Not good to not consider how much to set aside for the bills that come in monthly. Often their was not enough money left -- so next month two paymts. were owed instead of one. You can only do things like this for so long --- until something hits the fan for some reason. Maybe a bounced checked or two. Talk about pandemonium.
Eventually, I just took back over -- it is difficult yet, but there is always hope that one day he will find a way to get back to his passable. Until then I stay on guard.
I'm running quite late today. It is all fine, but a lot took place. Had a lost dog for awhile but managed to get him before he got hauled off to doggie jail. Then I had to work an extra hour. Then with all the "dog" issues I didn't get to go to my friends ( she is gone to FLA. ) cats this morning -- so two hours at her house after work to set everything to rights. Then back home late ( Dh and fam members in the drive-way just as I pulled in as they arrived very shortly before me ). Glad he is back --- this will help a lot with staying on track a bit better after this. Also, knowing someone is here will help me have a little more of a relaxed morning when I do get up.
Anyway, just got supper done and will be relaxing/falling asleep likely in my recliner soon enough. I'm a little bushed.
Hope you all had a really nice day.
Blessings,
Jackie
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It is my calling to treat every human being with grace and dignity, to treat every person, whether encountered in a palace or a gas station, as a life made in the image of God. -Sheila Walsh
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Despite the fact that we are awaiting rain ( dh ran out and is on the mower as I type ) its a pretty good day already for me. Gym at 2 p.m. I had to miss yesterday and sort of hated that but it all worked out in the end. Life has a habit of going on no matter what so once you GET that good enough you can just put on your 'keeping up' clothes and try to do that. I'm keeping up today so far. It is also going to be cool enough to wear one of my lighter sweatshirts. Just as I was thinking of putting them away so sure glad that I didn't already. Almost hate that the screen is in the door --- but we really needed it. We have the inside door closed and our I-heater cranking away to take off the chill.
Took Dh out for his birthday dinner last night. Corner Café -- it is a sort of down home type restaurant -- not fantastic, but they have a nice variety and it is affordable. Dh turned 76 on May 16th. Was in S. Dakota then, but he had a nice party there with his adult children and grandchildren and at least one great-grand four yr. old. So, now it is back to reality here. I think I detect a little age on him. He told m this morning how good it was to be home. A lot more quiet and much more relaxed schedule -- also I know that a 14 hr. or so drive ---- even with someone else doing the driving can be wearing on much younger people. I do love that he seems to want to get up and going much earlier than he usually does. I'd love to see a little of that last.
Hope you are all going to have a really good day. I'll be checking in from time to time as I always do. See you all then.
Blessings,
Jackie
P.S. Thinking of all who are recovering ( Carole ) from procedures and all who are having issues ( Sandra & Mike ) and all who are just having issues and maybe too busy in some other way to post.
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I think some men are just not used to handling money.... unless they grew up always wanting or needing something. And then when like us, we slowly begin to dig ourselves out of paying rent, raising children, paying bills, and always behind on something, and paying a "little".....we learn to never get, or use credit cards. And yes, money should just go into the bank.... Ha!
If you have money in the bank, with a debit card, you are a lot more careful than if you carry around a credit card, and can just charge anything you want. I had a Penney's card once.... but if you don't pay everything off, the interest will just eat you up alive, and you think you can BUY it, and just use your card.
Plus, we signed for furniture for my in-laws one time, because THEIR credit was bad... Well of course they didn't think they had to pay those monthly bills, because WE had it in our name! FINALLY got them to realize we didn't also want them to take us down WITH them, and we never did it again....
They struggled with money their whole lives, mostly because FIL was a drunk, no-good, thief, who even took money his wife gave him to pay a bill, and he spent it on drinking.... It's funny how some people can go their whole lives, living as if the world owes them a living.
Our older neighbor lost everything she had.... because she racked up so many charges on her credit card... Had to go to court.... Then she lost her house, and had to move into a State run housing, where her SS would pay most of it.... She even tried to rent her house out, when she left, but was told NO.... because her house was in foreclosure, so she could not rent it, and take that money, that she couldn't pay to the bank! Always an angle.... Ha!
So bad habits will just run you into the ground....
Jackie, sometimes you have to celebrate, even if it is not in an expensive place! Those are more fun anyway..... glad he is home, and things are back to normal.... Trips are just hard anyway....
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Mornin all
Guess I was on the opposite side of the money issue. My husband took care of all the finances, always. And saving always came before spending. Every month there was a lecture about us using too much electricity, and there were daily not-so-gentle reminders if we opened the too often or left a light or fan on. With 7 of us, those reminders were constant, then came the grandkids. He always had me believing we were one step from bankruptcy. As I got older, and smarter, I realized we were far from bankruptcy. But I also became aware that Bob's mentality (probably from his parents living thru the depression- although so did mine and they didn't think this way) was always to save, save, save. And those savings were never to be touched- they were for retirement. I came to wonder if he would ever be comfortable spending what he had saved for retirement. I was right- when he retired, he could not make himself touch the savings. Luckily, I was still working, and he got a part-time job at a cruise line. Great cruise benefits. Thank God, someone suggested he go to the VA about his diabetes, and long story short he was eventually declared 100% disabled! and between that and his SS, we lived quite nicely. I now get about 1/4 of what he got from the VA, and with my own SS get by month to month I still feel incredibly guilty when I have to take out of the retirement funds for a major purchase.
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I am the bill payer in our partnership. Our agreement is that we discuss any major expenditure. DH will come to me and ask, "Can we afford for me to spend this amt. on this purchase?" My instinctive answer is no! It's funny because dh's father was a tightwad and his mother a spendthrift who never had much to spend until she began to receive her own social security check. She was in heaven with her own $$ to spend.
I have loosened up because we're getting so old that it's time to spend whatever money we can afford to spend while we can enjoy the benefits of saving all those years. Once I wouldn't buy a piece of clothing at full price. I would wait until it went on sale. By then my size might not be available. Now if I REALLY like something, I will buy it. There were so many times I bought clothing that was on sale and ended up not getting much use out of it because I didn't REALLY like it.
DH and I have both worked our entire marriage and we took advantage of putting away retirement funds tax free. We could have lived "higher on the hog" and not saved for retirement. Also, we didn't have children, mostly because we just never reached the state of mind where we wanted to have a family. That lifestyle worked for us. Now we think sometime it might be kind of fun to have grandchildren, but you don't have grandchildren if you don't put in your time being a parent!
Jackie, I'm glad your dh enjoyed his visit and is now happy to be back home. It sounds like the two of you have a good life together. I enjoy eating out at a restaurant that isn't pricey. We're lucky to have quite a few good ordinary places to eat. Mostly I cook and we eat at home. I happen to like cooking and eating at home is generally more healthy.
Just call me blabbermouth today! Wishing everyone a good day.
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I have always been the bill payer in our house. My husband was in grad school when we got married and traveled so much during his career as a Civil Engineer that he never had the time or, frankly, the interest in taking care of the bills. He does take care of all of our retirement funds, investments and taxes because I don't understand any of that stuff!
We've had an interesting week since returning from vacation! My Mike got up the next day and mentioned he had a slight pain on the front of his upper thigh and over the next few days grew steadily worse until last Friday when the pain was completely radiating down his left leg and he couldn't walk at all!! So off to the emergency room we went. I was afraid he had a blood clot or hernia in his groin but it turned out to be a pinched nerve. The dr. put him on steroids and pain pills and he's gradually improved. We had promised 3 of our little grandchildren a sleepover on Friday night so I was on my own entertaining them and taking care of my patient. If he doesn't feel totally healed by next week he'll need an MRI to see if this is coming from his lower back which he's had 3 surgeries on already. I have a feeling that him acting like a 25 yr. old and body surfing every day on Maui didn't help.
Happy to see that you, Carole, are on the mend from foot surgery, and Sandra it was good to see your post. It must be so difficult for Mike to be living in limbo and it's a scary limbo! I can see where you may be scared and a bit frustrated too........worried and trying to be as understanding as possible through all of this but not appreciating being used as a punching bag either! Mommarch, hopefully your chemo treatment is killing those nasty cells and you will be back in good health soon.
Our weather today is very cloudy but in the 70s and muggy. Tomorrow I plan to get the flowers for the planters on the deck and get all of that done over the long weekend. Thinking of all of you and hoping you're having a good week!
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Luvmaui, hope your Mike gets back to normal rapidly.
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Noisey day around here, as they are putting a new roof on our cabin. Got away from it for a while , our senior players group put on our skits for a neighboring senior apt. complex. We have a lot of fun doing this, and don't have to memorize. Thank Heavens!
I have always paid the household and travel bills. Don't know what DH will do , if I shuffle off first.
Have a frost warning out for tonight. Been cool and breezy, in the 50s, for which the roofers are thankful.
Hope all the hubbies are feeling better, and of course all those for whom we have been praying.
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Morning gals.... Maui, it DOES sound like he overworked/played that leg and back! Hopefully it will straighten itself out, without any more surgeries... maybe some physical therapy?
I had back surgery YEARS ago, to help that PAIN going from my left butt down my leg into my foot... 2 herniated disks pushing on the Sciatic nerve... It worked! But traction after, and more physical therapy got it up and running ...
I had Sciatica, but don't know what it could be in the FRONT of the leg... probably all that fun surfing, etc. he did?
Bonnets! It's been COOL here also.... for the past 5 or 6 days.... Still have my tomatoes covered...Snow in the mountains, but just rainy, damp weather here lately...
Carole, How's your foot? I'll bet it's getting a little better every day... We went to see my child-hood friend in the Care-Center again today..... Did I talk about this with you guys??? She had a stroke over a month ago, and can barely get a word out... and her right arm can move a little, but not her leg or foot! It is still in that boot like thing, to keep it from curling under... She scoots around in her wheel-chair, and uses her left hand to change the TV channel on the remote, but that's about IT !!!
She had been laying there outdoors, when it happened for maybe 5-6 hours, before her Son was called to check on her.... I think that is why she has such a hard time with "Aphasia".... She can say yes, or no, but gets so FRUSTRATED when she can't get the words out... I change the subject fast... She was maybe going home like next Wednesday? But man, I don't see how that can happen without 24 hour care...
When we leave there, after seeing her, I just want to cry... Even my Husband says "that is just awful......" We all have so much to be thankful for, even if we have things going on... but looking at her, this gal I grew up with, who has had the fullest, life.... Traveling all over the world, has a new Beau, who loves her dearly, volunteers for 3 different places... gone every minute of the day..... And now ...... It's just hard to see her..... I honestly don't see her ever coming out of this.... not at our age....
BUT, my DH walked out in the hall, and saw a gal, pushing a much younger girl in a wheel-chair... The girl in the wheel-chair couldn't speak... so her Sister??? was pushing her and talking to her... Live is so precious.... We just never know .........
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You are so right, Chevy. Life with any good quality is precious and none of us appreciates just how precious until the quality is threatened or lost.
Thank you for inquiring about my recovery. I am walking around quite a bit and doing more of my usual household chores. I make up our bed but don't bother with comforter and decorative pillows. Just straighten the sheet and light blanket and plump up the pillows we use for sleeping. Yesterday I put together a main dish for dinner and cooked it in a slow cooker. I make myself a cup of coffee during the day and can carry it safely to my comfortable chair in the living room.
The funny thing is that prior to my surgery, I got out crochet materials and even bought a new pattern book and some yarn, thinking that would be a good recovery project. I also got out a huge stack of cooking magazines to thumb through and cut out recipes of interest. This was another project. I haven't done any of the projects!
Once I don't have to worry about keeping the foot elevated, I have other projects In mind. One is finishing the sewing of a stack of placemats. Another is straightening up the office by filing stacks of papers that cover the desk.
DH was up early and went to the gym for his Thurs. morning exercise. When he returns, we'll have breakfast. After that, my busy day of sitting in my chair and operating the tv remote will commence!
Wishing everyone a peaceful pain-free day.
Oh, I get to take a shower today! My first since Tues. of last week.
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Carole, Congrats on the shower. I'll bet there's nothing you would like more.
We stayed in a campground in Bend, OR. Rented a yurt, which was pretty nice. Big seller was solar powered showers. The whole place could take a long shower and not run out of hot water. Heaven!
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Wren, that's really cool! Or warm, as the case may be!
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There is no such thing as can’t, only won’t. If you’re qualified, all it takes is a burning desire to accomplish, to make a change. Go forward, go backward. Whatever it takes! But you can’t blame other people or society in general. It all comes from your mind. When we do the impossible we realize that we are special people. -Jan Ashford
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What's a yurt ???? We have all the time hot water here, but we have a tankless water heater. It is attached to the wall in the little cupboard room that housed the old water heater. It was the first thing we did when we bought this house -- go to Lowes and get the tankless variety. We didn't pay that much for it -- or rather I guess I should say they are a lot more expensive now then when we purchased ours. I think the convenience ( hot water when you want, for as long as you want ) is well worth it and I'd be hating if something happened to ours -- and everything kicks the bucket sooner or later. I'm sure you all realized I was really whispering VERY quietly when I said that.
Anyway -- another pretty long day for me. I think those will calm down now. I will go back to my friend's in the morning and check out everything, but I think that will be it for the day -- then back to my regular scheduled program. Actually --- I will have a four day stint at the end of the month where I live over at Dr. B's house for four days while they are gone -- but that is a few days away yet. Tomorrow will still end up a bit busy --- I'm working tomorrow night --- so a nice week-end so to speak to relax. That would be Sat, Sun, and Monday --- the days where it will likely storm and rain again. Sigh !!!!!
I will enjoy it thought. I didn't realize breaking in the new ( although she is actually old ) kitty-cat here in addition to stopping at my friends' daily and doing her cats, picking up the mail, cleaning the floors, and doing the outdoor cats would take up most of my day. I have my own to do here too --- so I'm ready for a bit of a breather.
I'm with Chevy and Carole --- we really do get stuck in ruts so to speak and forget that we don't know what is in store for us so being thankful and grateful for life, any or all of it daily is not a wasted thing, ever. There are lots of ups and downs and I tend to be grateful for all of it. I am growing my soul through the negative and the positive so I am grateful for all of it. Still, of course, some of it is difficult --- so I'm trying to keep myself in half way reasonable shape so that I can keep a straight back and stiff upper lip for the challenges and breathe deep sighs of relief for the positive times.
We usually never know why WE need these soul-magnifying lessons and I quit worrying about that a long time ago. The why doesn't matter all that much right now -- the doing does.
I hope you all had a really pretty day. We finally had an afternoon of sun and true to form --- it made me start to sparkle again. Still cooler than I'd like but all in good time. Before you know it more than likely I'll be wishing this coolness had lasted a bit longer.
See you all later.
Blessings
Jackie
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Glad that you are doing well, Carole!
Yes, Chevy, you are right about life being precious. We don't often appreciate what we have until we are threatened. I guess that is why we should try to enjoy every good day and be more realistic about our later years. Sometimes that is very hard to do. I often catch myself dwelling on what I don't have or what I am missing instead of looking at all the good things I do have in my life.
I'm with Jackie. What is a yurt?
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Hello folks!!! I may be 59 but I refuse to be old ... lol! I just got dx'd with IDC yesterday. I am from Alberta, Canada. I saw a poster from Ontario, above. Not much to say except hello and I'm starting to learn about this ugly thing called cancer.
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NorthernCanuck - Hi again!
There is a thread for 40-60 year olds but the ladies here are SOOOO much nicer. The 40-60 thread has 'odd' rules, like you can't talk about the weather.
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Not talking about the weather rules out about 30 per cent of conversation!!! I don't like rules unless they make you healthier or happier or have some really good reason for being.
Surprise! It's cool enough here this morning to open the kitchen door. See what I mean? Weather conversation! And this is exciting conversation for those of us who have been running the a/c constantly for some weeks now.
DH is off to play golf today and I have a leisurely stretch of hours with some things to do in addition to sitting and propping up my feet. No complaints. I'm thankful not to be in pain and to be in a state of healing.
DH went outside with my cell phone today and took some pictures of the daylilies, which have been in full bloom. I'll post a picture with the phone.
Happy Friday to all.
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Forgot to say Welcome to NorthernCanuck. 59 seems young to me now. Hope you'll get acquainted with us and let us lend support as you do whatever is necessary to regain good health. Best of luck to you.
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