Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

petite1

Good morning, ladies. After my walk I will finish cleaning the house. It is best for me to take 2 days to do it. I still miss my cleaning lady. After that maybe do some ebay.

IllinoisLady, Deep thought for the day, I found it to be a little depressing.

IllinoisLady

The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.

M. Scott Peck

IllinoisLady

Interesting how one perceives things. I found the quote your speaking about petite late last night. I found it truthful ( for me anyway ) which also gave me a feeling of being liberated. The truth almost always sets you free and you can in fact, make far better choices once you are totally willing to SEE what is going on. As in the above quote, it goes along the same lines of accepting what is real, even when highly uncomfortable so it can be changed. Not trying to change your mind -- each person should feel what they feel, but wishing to explain why the quote felt important to me. I'm happy to be able to get your honest feeling.

Today we get sun. I am sure ready. Yesterday was rainy and dreary. We could maybe get an errant little shower. I hope not but think it could hold off till nighttime. The last few yrs. we seem to get nighttime moisture a lot more. Later on, in a couple of days our temps will go back up to fairly warm ( 70 or so ) which will be nice to try and dry out a little.

Dh will take a piece of wood and a jack out back and we will start taking up the fence posts from the dog yard we are doing away with. I'll be glad when it is all open again. We are going to leave the two big dog houses out there. Maybe at some point in time we can find someone to take the biggest one. I got some Deep Woods spray the other day so hopefully can get back out in the yard w/o fearing every live tick there will find me. Funny -- I check the animals that so out and nothing. The ticks seem to prefer people.

I hope you all have a really good day.

ChiSandy

I've been thinking the same thing, Jackie--all these people clamoring to reopen the economy so we can go back to normal don't realize that "normal" as we knew it in 2019 is gone forever. No amount of wishing, reopening businesses or allowing large gatherings will bring it back. (On the contrary: it'll likely accelerate our near-extinction; Nature will say "hold my beer" and we won't know what hit us). Sometimes the universe gets to call the shots, and this is shaping up to be one of those times.

kathindc, Friday night Bill Maher made many of the same points--when we invade animal habitats for our own convenience & enjoyment, we pay a terrible price down the road.

carolehalston

There is a deep skepticism in those who haven't experienced the dangers of the virus, just learned about it on tv and from governors and mayors. I'm afraid the only way to convince those people is for them to "experience" the threat themselves by getting ill or having family and friends get ill and possibly die.

I listened to three or four medical epidemiologists yesterday on various talk shows and they expect this virus to be a factor in our lives until it can be stopped by a vaccine or medicine. So I guess we will have to go about our lives wearing masks, using disinfectant (not drinking or inhaling it!) and being as careful as we can be.

I was awake at 6 am this morning so I went to the Winn Dixie supermarket nearby with a grocery list about 7:30. The senior shopping time is 7 to 8. I had sandwich deli meat on my list and, lo and behold, the Deli doesn't open until 8. I guess seniors aren't meant to buy at the Deli counter. And the fish counter was empty. So much for shopping between 7 and 8. The e were very few shoppers and most of them were wearing masks.

I haven't been wiping all my bought items with an alcohol wipe but today I did. I feel sorry for unemployed people with families because I notice that almost everything in the supermarket is higher priced.

It's a beautiful day today, in the low 60's this morning and warming up to about 80. Humidity is low. These are the days that we wish we could capture and release at a later date.

Betrayal

The invasion of animal habitats has lead to situations like this and my concern is that people will try to eliminate these animals and their habitats to prevent future occurrences as a people first knee jerk reaction. If Covid 19 did indeed originate from bats, it was due to people invading their environs and then transporting them to wet markets as food. Will they now plan to eliminate bats which play such an important role in the balance of our ecosystem? Bats eliminate insects that are known disease carriers (vectors) so they in essence protect us from other insect borne diseases. I did not see the Bill Maher program but would be curious as to what he suggested as protecting animal rights.

I have traveled to several African countries and while they are promoting tourism through animal treks, they realize that they must protect their most important asset: the animals in their natural habitat. In the countries I visited, they do not eat these animals, respect distancing from the animals and work hard to prevent extinction of rhinos, elephants, giraffes and others. I have always loved zoos and have access to the US's oldest zoo, but now realize we exploit these animals. True, we are helping to preserve some species but we also need to promote them in a more natural habitat. I have seen elephant habitats in other zoos (we no longer have them) that were so confining the elephants were exhibiting anxiety reactions. Normally they are grazing 16-18 hours per day over vast areas which is hard to do in a small moat like enclosure. Yes, zoos do allow people to see animals they might never see in their natural habitat, but to see them in their natural habitat makes one realize the cruelty of zoos. I will never be able to go to a zoo again.

So to me this is like a chicken and egg situation, since we pay a terrible price, but then so do the animals.

CindyNY

We've had 2 days of much needed rain. I focused on inside work and read a lot. When I tried to finally hang a mirror I purchased months ago, I've forgotten where I put the hardware to hang it. I'm using interlocking hooks, 2 on wall face up, 2 on mirror face down; they slide into one another. I have no idea where I put the 2 for the wall, as well as 4 screws & anchors. We were getting guests, I moved them out of the guest room back in March and put them some where safe. HA!

I did clean out multiple drawers, found a little bottle of hand sanitizer in one. So it wasn't a total waste of time looking for the hooks.

COVID - being in FL I'm surrounded by people, say, of an older generation than me. (I'll be 61 in June) 85 yr old - he believes they were all going to die anyway; anyone who lost their job and can't pay rent or eat - that's how they want to live. 74 yr old- she's out every single day to various stores, not following much of any restrictions, nor wearing a face mask. I could go on. All very nice people that I would hate to see become ill.

Some people don't see the forrest for the trees. 85 yr old says he doesn't know anyone who has died. He sees this as BS, and will quote numbers for the annual flu (Rush L quotes I assume). I know a sweet, kind, courageous, brave and smart past colleague who lost her life alone at 53.

I'm assuming life has changed, and we'll be protecting ourselves for years to come. As with the flu, this will mutate and we'll do the yearly immunization to find it didn't cover X mutation. An on going life change. I read what I typed and think GLUM. But we are resilient, it's just going to take some time. ❤

On that happy note, lol, it's 74 out w low humidity, and I'm going to work out with girlfriends on Zoom this afternoon! Have a good one ladies.

petite1

Hi, Ladies. It is a beautiful day out. So pleasant to walk and enjoy the good stuff.

IllinoisLady

To a happy person, the formula for happiness is quite simple: Regardless of what happened early this morning, last week, or last year—or what may happen later this evening, tomorrow, or three years from now—now is where happiness lies. Happy people understand that life is really nothing more than a series of present moments to experience, one after another. They understand and appreciate the past for what it taught them about living more in the now, and they see the future as more present moments to experience. Mostly, they understand that right now, this very moment, is where life is truly lived. -Richard Carlson

carolehalston

I don't want to offend anyone, but the people who amaze me are those who think they can do whatever they want to do, and God will protect them. It doesn't seem to occur to them that God may have given them a brain and human intelligence for them to use as they navigate their way through life. If you stand on a railroad track when a train is coming, you're not displaying faith in God to protect you, you're displaying stupidity. My humble opinion.

Even those who are knowledgeable about disease and transmission are in a learning cycle with Covid-19. I choose not to be a mouse in the laboratory, if I can avoid it. With that said, I realize that life holds a lot of chance. I could get hit by a car when I'm getting the mail out of our mailbox beside the street.

So philosophical this morning!

On the mundane side, I am choosing yard work over golf this morning. I will need to be careful as I climb a stepladder to prune the sweet olive tree outside the front door. DH won't be around to help me off the ground if I fall. He just left to go and play golf. We're supposed to have another nice day.

Back on the Coronavirus topic, our Democratic governor in this red state surprised me and earned my continuing approval when he extended the Stay at Home mandate another two weeks because Louisiana does not yet meet the criteria for opening up business. I had expected him to bow to pressure, but he didn't. One question I would like to ask. If our economy was so wonderful prior to this health crisis, why can't people miss a paycheck or two without being destitute?

petite1

Good morning, Ladies. It is another beautiful morning and great for my walk. IllinoisLady, I like the happy person quote. I consider myself to be a happy person for the most part and enjoy the little pleasures like the first cup of coffee, this beautiful morning, my little cats and my husband (most of the time) Still talk about slowly opening up.

IllinoisLady

You have to leave the city of your comfort

and go into the wilderness of your intuition.

What you'll discover will be wonderful.

What you'll discover is yourself.

- Alan Alda

CindyNY

Carolehalston - paycheck loss, only my theory. High end earners spend at a higher rate keeping up w the Jones. Low end earners, some working 3 part time jobs to make rent & put food on the table, live paycheck to paycheck.

I think I fell middle of that road back before I retired. I was told, or I had read, to have 6 months of living expenses in the bank. High end earners should have it; low end earners, near impossible. I was brought up to believe there is no crime being poor.

Big Q would be why large corporations fail to do the same and have 6 months of expenses banked. I have no problem aiding the poor. I have a large issue supporting large corporations that depend on our tax money to bail them out. Poor planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on my part. That to me is a crime.

Low humidity again today, 74 now. I'm hoping to get a nice hike in today. Enjoy your day & stay safe!

MCBaker

A lot of businesses are opening up, curbside services only. Dog groomers included!! I cannot see Tippy's eyes. But first I have to get a bordetella shot for him, and have to wait until the eighth for vet appt. Frustration!

I am waking up earlier every morning. This morning I woke up at 3-something. Waited until 4:00 and got up. About ready to go down for a nap, I think. I don't know, maybe this new normal, difficulty sleeping long enough to get all the sleep I need for the day, is due to the chemo and stuff, or maybe just age. I was expecting my new AC to arrive today, but now it seems like there is a delay.

Making masks, but waiting until a package of 3D printed gadgets arrives. I have close to 100 stacked up, ready to go.

IllinoisLady

With you on all you said Carole. We need to be for each other, and help each other. That does mean to me that we leave it all to some' being'. We were suppose to be made in an image -- and if the 'being' is all powerful then he or she is powerful enough to give us brains backed up with all the most up to date ( that we have ) or can learn, if need be, along the way, to take care of ourselves.

I don't want to fail to use gifts given for my benefit. Life, even under quite harsh conditions always strains much more to continue than to give up. The will to survive is the strongest part of all of us.

A few things to do early this morning. We could get rain, but are having nice ( not full on bright ) sunshine right now. So, we will see what we can get done. I need to run over to the next town ( will have to check with Gas Buddy first ) and fill my half empty tank. Newer Chevy's have a gas tank sensor and if you constantly let your gas get too low ( under 1/4th. tank ) it tends to knock the sensor out. So, ( as was the case in a car I had to use to drive my patient around a few yrs. ago ) even when you fill up the tank you never know what is there save watching mileage. This tank would register any thing it felt like but never the condition it was really in. I did not want that to happen to my car so decided half empty would be the right time for me to fill up.

Upside is that it never seems to cost near as much as it used too. That said, I don't go near as much as I used too so it feels even better to me. The one thing we still do is pay all the bills ( local ) that we can and save stamps. All of our local destinations for this are within a couple miles of each other so it does not make sense to me to use the mail.

I think it is hard for people to miss paychecks because in many cases people just aren't good money managers. I myself, live paycheck ( that would be social security only now ) to paycheck and I know a lot of other people do it too. Medical expenses from a few yrs. after we came home ate up all our savings and retirement money. Even both of us going back to work was not enough ( much higher pay scale in California ) to get us back on track. It is how it is and I'm okay with it though I'd definitely prefer the financial state we had upon arriving home. Still, I am grateful for the fact that so far ( I admit I hated having to use a credit card for groceries a couple of times ) we are keeping up all right. Our blessings far outweigh any troubles and grievances. Seems when we need something we find it somehow. Just got that dead tree down and only $100.00 to do it.

I think the Governors ( many of them not including De Santis'es of the world ) are ignoring Washington where and if at all possible and hoping to be able to slowly incorporate wise choices for any changes made in the work environments of their state. We have only them to rely on so this is a good thing. Glad LA is being sensible and I hope most other states ( and I think they will ) follow.

Hope you all have a great day.

Wren44

Our governor is opening up golf, fishing, and state parks May 4. The big demonstrations on the news were about fishing, by the way. I told DH I would be ashamed to demonstrate for the right to go fishing and could never hold my head high afterward. They weren't saying they needed the fish to eat, just to enjoy fishing for the fun of it. And other demonstrations have people wanting a haircut. And people think millennials are entitled! Sheesh! I hope we never need to count on these people to make a real sacrifice over anything.

I've read that the majority of Americans would have trouble covering a $400 doctor bill, so it's no surprise that they don't have savings. People who have never been poor just don't get it. I have needed to get commodities (food before food stamps) once and had a year my daughter describes as 'the year we had soup every day and on the good days we had bread with it'. It may have taken us extra time to pay, but we have eventually paid every debt we owed which is more than a number of wealthy people can say.

My father taught me his belief that all work is equal. The garbage man works as hard as the doctor and deserves the same respect for a job well done. I think it was a wonderful thing to learn.

MCBaker

I guess I needed that nap. Even periodic episodes of my dog trying to scare off anyone who might want to hurt me did not motivate me to end my nap. Sciatica did.

I have been in need of financial help during multiple times in my life. A marriage to a man for whom drag racing was more important than marriage figured into the recipe. Then, a disastrous job situation, from which I did not recover until too late. Nowadays, there are enough benefits which supplement minimal SS (I took time off when my kids were little) that life in poverty isn't too onerous.

Yes, shame at poverty has been a serious problem for me. The most serious problem was shame at the option of taking full advantage of benefits for which I qualify.

CindyNY

MCBaker - my mom lost her parents within months of each other. At 16, 1936, she was the new "mom" to her younger siblings. All able to work, quit school and got jobs, to keep the "babies" in school. If not for the goodness of others, they'd have starved, been thrown out in the street, or put into orphanages.

My moms been gone now 18 years on 4/26. She instilled in me that there is no crime, and should be no shame, in being poor. If you're entitled to a benefit, accept that at this time you need it. Don't let pride stop you. HUGS

IllinoisLady

Glad I mentioned ( I had some reservations about owning up ) living paycheck to paycheck. I grew up poor except I was almost an adult before I knew it. I learned ( late in life ) after we lost our Ins. to take what was available. I felt something was really wrong -- recalled I had VA benefits, and enrolled in the VA system for health care. Sometimes it bothers me that I get so much when I didn't retire from the military -- just served my enlistment. Anyway, they saved my life....that was in 2007 when my breast cancer was discovered by the VA.

As Cindy said so gently and nice MC -- there is no shame in being poor. We don't always get to choose our outcomes. We didn't have a huge retirement, but I certainly didn't foresee using almost every penny up on later life medical issues. I'm sure my early life ( though at the time my parents did not take handouts of any kind ) helped me when we had the change of fortune happen to us. Even with the change my friends are still my friends and my family loves me just as much. If I really need something it seems to find its way to my door.

I bet you have helped lots of people in your life MC and never thought a thing about it because it was the right thing to do. Someone else saw that sometimes people need different forms of help or benefits of some kind. It is mutually rewarding. We help someone else when we can because there is a need and we are happy to fill it. Our needs are filled about the same way. I think it is just a special kind of karma.

MCBaker

Thank you. It is nice to not have to hide it.

carolehalston

Good discussion of reasons for living paycheck to paycheck. I grew up very poor and learned resourcefulness and thrift. DH grew up in a family that was a little more prosperous but blue collar. His family took one week vacations and my family never took a road trip vacation. Throughout our marriage we have always had some savings, even when we were poor. I invested in an IRA the first year it was available. During years when we both were earning income, we lived on one income and invested the other income. There was never any effort to keep up with the Jones. But we did not have children so we had only ourselves and our future retirement to consider.

We had stormy weather last night but the worst of it passed north of us. We needed rain and we got quite a bit. It is looking like a rainy day much of the day today.

A friend of mine has accomplished the technology challenge of getting the Silver Sneakers workout routines on their website to play on her tv. I would like to do the same. I benefited a great deal from the SS workouts at the gym. A lot of stretching and some cardio as well. I have been walking for exercise, doing some yard work, and playing some rounds of golf, but adding the SS routines would be good.

petite1

Good morning, ladies. I too, have been down on my luck and lived paycheck to paycheck. In my 40's I worked to payoff everything and have no debt by the year 2000. Then all money would be saved and invested for retirement. It worked out pretty well. My husband did the same thing. We both have funny stories from our poor young adulthood.

IllinoisLady

Are you balanced? Do you share your time, your energy, your life, as much with yourself as you do with those around you?. . . . Know your limits. You are one of the most important people you need to look after and love. Balance your time, your energy, your life with those around you. You'll be able to give more freely and joyfully as a result, and you'll be more open to the gifts of the universe. It's not wrong to give to others. But it's okay to say yes to ourselves, too. -Melody Beattie

IllinoisLady

Rained overnight here too -- a lot. All the ditches were full and puddles in the roads. The sun keeps coming out ( pretty good now and then ) but in between are a lot of black clouds hanging in the sky. It would not surprise me at all to have a pour-down or two through the day. It is okay with me since it is far too wet to do much outside anyhow. The night time rains seem to bring much more water lately than what we get in the day rains. Wonder if that is some global warming effect. We use to have very little rain at night.

I hope you are all going to have a really nice day.

CindyNY

We got out to Six Mile Slough to take in a walk. I think it's a mile and a quarter, on a nice level boardwalk. We've never seen it so dry. Rain supposed to hit tomorrow, and boy, we really need it.

Reader425

Today was nice but tomorrow here aims to give us buckets of rain for those spring flowers.

I too enjoyed the discussion about living paycheck to paycheck. I worked initially for 5 years teaching in a private school for a pittance. Lived below the poverty line really, communally, in a houseful of other young teachers. After being hired by a tech company I had to do the kind of work Petite describes of saving and trying to recover $$ from that period, as good as other parts of the experience were, retiring from there. My husband and I, also no children, live pretty simply, thankful for what we do have and share when we can.

IllinoisLady

Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness,

and the word happy would lose its meaning

if it were not balanced by sadness.

It is far better take things as they come along

with patience and equanimity.

- Carl Jung

IllinoisLady

Cooler than I like but after a lot of rain we do have sun today. Don't know if we will keep it, but warmer tomorrow. I hope no rain for a bit. The leaves on the trees which are dressing for Spring are just so pretty and vivid. I love the look of richness when the foliage returns after the winter rest. Grass is growing well although we need to put some fresh grass seed down. Should have been done already, but that's okay.

Still working on the last few support poles around the former dog pen. Had hoped to have them all gone but that chore has gone in fits and spurts. I had Dh take another 'baby' tick off of me. I think I have had already about five of them -- most so tiny that a strong light and magnifying glass along with needle nose tweezers had to be used. I'm starting to wonder if being out in the yard is a good thing. I got some Deep Woods Off and will be a bit more generous with it next time I go out.

Nothing special planned but plenty to do. Time to catch up on laundry, so that will start my day and now that the rain is done I can steam-mop my floors again. No carpet here so mopping is a big chore at our house. Not much for curtains either -- just swags at some of the windows. Sure has helped with the allergy reactions in Spring and Fall. My allergy response takes place somewhat all yr., but Spring and Fall are the worst of it. So thank goodness we live where we do not need full window coverings. I really loved giving up carpet. I do know people who kept their shoes in the mudroom -- so their carpets were always clean but we were never set up to so as to do that. With our multiple dogs and cats it was far easier to have small area rugs to dump in the washer often and no wall to wall. Now though I'm keeping area rugs put away and will take my comforter ( a bit later ) to the laundry in town to do. My machines ( Sears Kenmore ) are roughly 11 or maybe 12 yrs. old and I'm getting nervous about the stress of sometimes daily use and more so about putting in the big items like comforters.

I hope you all have a wonderful day, good weather and stay well.

petite1

Good morning, Ladies. Miss Felix (the cat) and I had an adventure to the Vet's office. They did curbside service. I waited in the parking lot while she got her nails done. LOL Lot's of rain this morning.

carolehalston

DH and I live simply, too. We both had an interest in travelling and have traveled quite a lot, but not on the Ritz level. We are members of a country club but we do not own a home in the subdivision where the two courses are located. And we're probably the least wealthy members. One thing we've learned about wealthy people from getting to know some is that they can be the biggest cheapskates.

We got two prices yesterday on removing the large dying oak tree that is close to our house. One was $1800 and the other was $2700. Yikes. A real budget breaker, for sure. We have another person coming on Monday. It will be interesting to see how their price compares. The tree has to come down because one large branch extends over our roof.

I just heard on a tv business channel that Costco is reporting good earnings. It is requiring all their employees to wear masks. I have heard good things about the Costco management and treatment of employees. I wish we had a store nearby instead of Sam's Club. The Walmart corporation does not have a good reputation for their treatment of employees. All it cares about is profit.

A pretty day here. I will go for a walk and, hopefully, lift my spirits. The outlook for the rest of the year is sobering, if we listen to the medical scientists.