Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

MCBaker

Here is me with my little boy. https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1021655663...

If you are not a Facebooker, you might not see it.

IllinoisLady

Religion asks us to believe in someone else's experience of the Divine,
while spirituality invites us to have our own.
- Timber Hawkeye

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
- Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

IllinoisLady

MCBaker your little boy is as cute as a button. I just read ( should have saved it ) that animals tend to give us the opportunity to be 'heart' healthy. I have to admit deep prejudice about this since I have been an animal lover all my life. If it moves there is a good chance I'll love whatever it is. There are some though, I would not welcome in my home or maybe even yard -- at least while I am outside -- like snakes for instance. They have their place, but I do find raccoons, possums, and other wildlife interesting. Love owls and eagles, and fish as well. Anyway, your little guy is adorable and seems to enjoy being with you as much as you enjoy him. Happy for you.

Dals I second Betrayal's words. Also, I do sometimes feel that we need to have some time to listen to our 'inner' guide. I do know my instinct was to have my lumpectomy asap. The biopsy showed a very non-aggressive tumor so my surgeon thought I had a lot of time. I didn't have the same view. Turned out while the operation was going on a second quite aggressive tumor was found. So, we need time to research as well as discover how we feel. There is no preparation for some diagnoses. So we each have to do what indicates -- so we need time to discover all the facts we need, but also to hear/understand what our true interior discovery of feeling is.

Wren44

LoveDals, Having to wait a few weeks will give you an idea of how you feel wearing prostheses (foobs). It may be more or less trouble than you think. At least you know now what is possible. The right decision will come to you.

pingpong1953

ChiSandy,

Did I just see you on Quora?

carolehalston

LoveDals, sorry you have so few options for reconstruction. Some women are happy with no reconstruction which makes for a simple recovery, so I'm told. I had immediate reconstruction and had some issues with healing but once I was "out of the woods," I was glad for my choices. I could have had some revision procedures to improve my results but I wasn't young enough to be concerned about having more attractive breasts. Good luck to you and keep us updated.

We're having a gloomy morning with probable showers and maybe even thunder storms. I'm off to the gym. If the weather isn't too rainy, I'll go to Walmart's afterwards for supplies needed for our Labor Day celebration. The management provides meat for the meal and is charge of the organization of the event. We've hired a karaoke entertainer. I'm already "angsting" about all that needs to be accomplished. After Labor Day things will be really quiet here at the resort.

Happy Monday to all.

ChiSandy

pingpong, you did indeed see me on Quora--sometimes I spend so much time there it seems like I'm "cheating" on BCO!

LoveDals, bummer about your narrowed options for recon. While you heal, a trial run of foobs might not be a bad idea--or you might find you're ok with going flat.

Mild and intermittent rain today. Went to the podiatrist to find out why the underside of my L lateral toes and the top of my foot hurt so much: a combo of flat feet (duh), pronation, osteoarthritis (as if I didn't already know) and the Bunion From Hell (which I've had since I was 21). The bunion caused the side of my foot to bear too much weight so my poor little piggies are taking the brunt. I also had a callus on #3 that made it 1/4" longer than it really is (causing me to stub it often). The doc trimmed it, which should ease some of the pain...but he also found a wart between it and the malformed thick toenail (which he's sure is fungus--I've had it lying dormant for decades until it took over that toe that I'd broken more than a few times. The wart began to bleed, so he had to cut short the "cutting short." He told me those cute little toenail fungus-treatment cartoon ads are bull: topicals don't work, and oral antifungals cause more side effects than they're worth. Same for treating the wart. But he did say it's fine to cover it up with nail polish, and that my pedicurist is doing a fine job on my ingrown big toenails. And no bunion surgery, thank heaven.

But meanwhile, that trimmed toe is hurting like hell (can't take off the bandage till tom'w night, and I have a mani-pedi Wed.). The doc prescribed "soft full-contact" orthotics in "extra-depth" shoes, but didn't cast me: he prefers dynamic fitting instead (standing in molding material after inking the feet and walking a couple yards) so I'm off to Waxberg's Walk Shop to see the pedorthist tomorrow evening. I will bring the sneakers, oxfords and Mary Janes I wear when not in sandals (all of which shoes I bought there) to see if they'll be deep enough to fit such deeply padded orthotics.

And now that the stitches are out of my "avocado hand," time to start woodshedding on guitar & dulcimer so I can kick butt at the Fox Valley Folk Festival on Sunday. My singing partner & I are putting together a music & comedy program for library concerts: "Growing Old Disgracefully" (that young whippersnapper just made Medicare).

pingpong1953

I spend a lot of time on Quora, too! It was so funny - I was reading your comment and when I hit the word "dulcimer" I scrolled up to look at the poster's picture. Lo and behold, it was you!

ChiSandy

Went to the pedorthist today--found out that not all of my sneakers, Finn Comfort oxfords and orthopedic Mary Janes may be deep enough to accommodate the custom orthotics. The Hokas I bought in Jerusalem (Mach One) are a size too small anyway. I did walk out with a pair of Hoka Bondi 6--they're described as "neutral-to-underpronating" and I overpronate; but as I will be getting a posted custom orthotic and have a pair of posted off-the-shelf ones, they'll be stable enough. I have a pair of the ones that have been great for me--Hoka Conquest--but they are loud turquoise-and-neon-green and after 4 yrs. I've begun breaking down the midsole just from walking. Meanwhile, my newly-trimmed calluses are stinging a bit--will have to tell the pedicurist not to work on them tomorrow.

I had to do this--my toes and top of the foot were hurting me too much to go back into the gym and walk very far. And without aerobic and weightbearing exercise, the diet won't work as well and my bones might weaken further.

carolehalston

I've been wearing Hokas for 5 or 6 years. They were recommended by my podiatrist. At first they were sold by only one small sports store but they are becoming more well known. In my opinion they are worth the price.

The sun is out this morning but I can see from the movement of leaves that there is a wind. Or breeze. I plan to do some shopping at Walmart for supplies for Saturday's big Labor Day celebration at the resort. I had my list yesterday but didn't feel like doing the shopping after the golf league meeting and lunch afterwards. Yesterday was a "hunker in" day, wet and cold and windy.

The forecast is good for Saturday when we'll have the Labor Day pot luck dinner and karaoke afterwards. I personally do not like karaoke but many people do, especially after they've drunk a lot of alcoholic beverages.

Happy Wednesday to all.

IllinoisLady

"The more generous we are, the more joyous we become. The more cooperative we are, the more valuable we become. The more enthusiastic we are, the more productive we become. The more serving we are, the more prosperous we become."

-- William Arthur Ward

Wren44

I wonder when shoe manufacturers are going to realize that they have 2 markets. Young lean runners love the neon brights, but the older crowd would really like the same comfort shoe in a more subdued color range. I don't mind people knowing I wear sneakers with everything, but I'd rather have a soft blue or wine for the color. I'm in the market for a new pair. I'm hoping for grey or wine. My black sneakers are men's because they are the only ones that weren't neon somewhere. I wear a 9 which is a man's 7, so they fit just fine and have the extra width I need. I've been wearing my old grey New Balance but they're becoming uncomfortable even with superfeet inside.

IllinoisLady

Sorry I have been AWOL for a bit. I finally did it. Trying to go too fast because I had so much to do Sunday I got tangled up with the same decorative fence that aided and abetted my previous fall three wks. ago. BTW -- fence is now removed. I now have to my credit a badly broken arm. It broke right under the ball, but farther down it sort of splintered. I'm awaiting an appt. yo a hosp. in St. Louis, Mo that specializes.

I likely will have a metal plate to stabilize the whole thing. I have to be off blood thinners for awhile yet, so going to have to grin and bear it till I can get screwed back together. I will do my best to keep up with the quotes for all of you, but likely won't write much or leave articles to enjoy. I'm feeling my way for the present and hunt and pecking. Not the most fun thing for a fast typist.

Thinking of all of you and wishing you well.

Jackie

'

MCBaker

Sorry to see this news, Illinois lady, but this, too shall pass.

keywestfan

So sorry, Illinois Lady. This is the tiniest of bumps in the road, but still horrible when it happens to you, as you know too well. Disruption of ones ordinary life can be very difficult. Thankfully it will be short term.

Wren44

Jackie, So sorry to hear this. Having only one useful arm is immensely difficult. The simplest things loom large. Hugs.

Beaverntx

Jackie, yuck! May your appointment and repair be soonest. Post the quotes if you can but if all you can do is check in to let us know how you are doing we will hang in until you are back! Hugs for good healing.

MinusTwo

Jackie - so sorry to hear about your broken arm. Hope it's not the dominant arm so you can at least eat comfortably.

ChiSandy

Jackie, I really feel for you--a year ago, my cast was just coming off. Can your DH feed you hand-peeled grapes while you recline in your chaise?

My new Bondi 6s are navy blue with pink laces and white soles in front gradating to pink at the heel. I looked online and noticed that they do make that model in solid black (both mesh & leather versions). Might get it if the new orthotics don't fit in my favorite Finn Comfort oxfords (Ikebukuro "Finnamic" rocker profile. black quilted patent leather). My podiatrist likes Hokas for the very light weight (as the hiking instructors say, "a pound on your feet is like five pounds in your backpack") and insane amount of cushioning. There's a similarly-styled model with stability/motion control (and a wider last) callled "Gaviota," but it has less cushioning. I tried both the Bondi & Gaviota (which was the same color scheme); I might have gone for the latter had I not tried the Bondi first--which feels like walking on marshmallows (as cushy as my "neon" Conquests). Because I'll be wearing them with custom orthotics (in the meantime, I'm using the Powerstep Pulse ones from the Conquests), the fact that it's a neutral rather than stability shoe is irrelevant. I have a pair of black leather "motion control" New Balance I bought 6 yrs. ago, but they're clunky, stiff & heavy (and not very comfy even with foam OTC sports orthotics). The last is so wide that if you view them from the bottom, you can't even tell left from right!

pingpong1953

I promised both of my sisters (both regular gym-goers) that I would start going to the gym today. I have to make a run to the next town (45 minutes away) for some sewing supplies, so I'll se how I feel after that. It doesn't take much to wipe me out, like 90 minutes of driving, so I'll try to fit a bit of a workout in maybe in the evening. Unlike most people, exercise doesn't energize me, so it won't keep me awake tonight. Anyway, I've sort of made a promise to you guys, too! We shall see.

carolehalston

Jackie, what awful news! I'm so sorry about your broken arm. I hope all the people you have helped will rise to the occasion and help you now.

Pingpong, I wish you success with your exercise program.

MCBaker

Pingpong, they told me at the gym that if it makes you tired, it is too much. What you need to do is find the right routine that does not make you tired, then work up from there.

HikingLady

Re: tired and exercise and "it doesn't take much to wipe me out," that pingpong1953 mentions....

I'm 62. For the past 5 years or so, even before bc, I found that evening exercise no longer worked, although it had for many years been my Usual plan. My stamina pooped out after a day of work (high school teacher). I'm retired now, but I find that mid afternoon, no matter how active or inactive I've been, I'm sluggish, sometimes have to actually sleep a tiny bit, or shut my eyes and rest for 10 minutes, and I don't have brain power for complicated stuff at the end of a day. Same goes for exercise. I happen to be a Morning Person anyway, so maybe that's part of it!

I exercise at 6 or 7 a.m. for one hour every weekday. After I'd recovered from chemo and surgery, etc. and could exercise again, I decided to commit to exercise first thing each day, as my #1 priority. Early morning is the only way exercise happens for me. If I put it off until afternoon or evening, I don't have the energy to get much out of the workout. Also, every other thing I need to do, like appointments or errands, can be scheduled for after 8 or 9 a.m., so nothing interrupts exercise. I plan my entire life around my daily one hour in the pool. Because of various arthritis and foot challenges, my Usual is 1 hour of Deep Water Exercise at my nearby indoor pool, using foam ankle cuffs and foam barbells, for resistance/muscle work + aerobic. Vertical in the deep end, head out of water. Or lap swimming. Some weights (free weights at home) or mat work (Pilates) when I have time and inclination (I should do more of that!).

How do I stick to this? My gym bag is packed and ready to go the night before, and my clothes are laid out. This is just a non-negotiable for me, and I'm committed to prioritizing it. It's like lots of things, I've found, in that once I'm there and in the water and moving, I'm glad to be there. There's a certain amount of self-talk required to get out the door every morning, for sure! My improved strength and muscle tone are better than 6 months ago when I started back to exercise, and that's also very strong motivation.

A certain amount of bravery is required to do this. My nearby public city pool has a common shower area and same for changing area; no little stalls with privacy curtains. So, there I am. Huge, horizontal BMX scars across my chest (NNS) and I walk past people with intact torsos, with my health history on public display. This has become "easier" (!!! not really, but maybe a little bit...) for me as time goes on, but I know it's probably startling for others to see for the first time.

Once or twice a week, I do an exercise outing with a friend, like a 2-4 mile hike/walk/bike ride, and we always start at 9 or 10 a.m., so it's finished by early afternoon, even with driving to our starting point. On weekends, DH and I do small hikes or walks, also in the morning.

Why am I so pooped in the afternoon? It's probably mostly age, of course, since I remember having a lot more energy until I was about 56 or so, before breast cancer and its challenges. I had chemo last year, and maybe I'm still recovering (cell repair, etc.). And, maybe my AI affects my energy. It's perhaps a perfect storm of all three. In fact, friends my age confide that waning stamina is also true for them, even without the bc treatment stuff!

I feel better, in general, if I do my daily hour of movement, which works all muscles. My arthritis whines a bunch more when I can't exercise for a day or two, so I try never to miss more than one day a week.

ChiSandy

HikingLady, I admire your resolve. I am a night owl--I get up early only if I must (medical & dental appts., physical therapy, flights, organized tours & seminars on trips, etc.). I'm playing at 11 am and again at 1pm at the Fox Valley Folk Festival on Sunday--a 2-hr+ drive from here. And if don't get there by 9:30am, the performer parking lot is full. So I'm staying over Sat. night at the festival's hotel. On Monday, I'm not sure if the Chi. Songwriters Collective needs me to emcee--if so, I'll stay over Sun. night too and head home about 1pm (we have Steely Dan tix at Ravinia, with a 6pm buffet dinner res. on-site; and in order to get there by 6 we need to take a 5pm train, leaving the house before 4:30). If I'm not needed Monday, I'll cancel my Sun. night room res (normally I'd have to forfeit the cost, but rooms are always hard to get by festival time).

I get tired around 9 or 10 pm, so 3pm is prime gym time for me--should I resume going to the gym. Most weekdays I rarely get up before 11 am, because my housekeeper feeds the cats. On weekends (and the occasional weekdays she needs to take off for her DH's medical treatments), I'm up about 10 am. If I try to walk to the farmers' mkt on Sat. mornings, it takes everything out of me. Amazing that before breast cancer I used to play my neighborhood farmers' market (back when it was just around the corner from me, all I had to do was cut through my alley to walk there, dragging my amp in a wheeled bag with one hand, guitar on my back, and accessories & dulcimer in a folding wheeled crate with my other hand--now they moved it to where I have to drive to haul my stuff--and there's nowhere free to park).

I am surprised how my feet don't hurt in my new Hokas--maybe it's the padded orthotic insoles I put in them (I get my custom ones in 2 wks), but when I went shopping today it felt like I was walking on marshmallows! If the weather is decent, I can see myself getting a daily walk in.

carolehalston

I'm not an early morning person but I prefer to go to the gym between the hours of 8 and 10 am. I don't enjoy every minute in the gym but I always feel good when my workout is over. I perspire a lot so that people look at my sweat-soaked tee shirt and remark, "You had a good workout." I like the cardio better than the weight exercise but I know my muscles need the weight exertion.

Jackie, thinking about you and sending healing vibes.

ChiSandy

Jackie, hope your arm heals fast! Does the V.A .down in Mt. Vernon partner with a university medical center (SIU Carbondale?) the way the Hines VA partners with Loyola and Jesse Brown with UIC? Anyway, I have no doubt you'll get primo care. There's a new kind of removable cast for arm surgery--I had it last year, called EXOS. It gets heated in a countertop turbo-oven (sorta like making Shrinky Dinks) and then molded to your arm. Mine was black, but you can order it in colors. And once your sutures are out, you can remove it to shower. (Unlike plaster, which you have to wrap in a plastic bag even when it rains). As to clothing, caftans are your friend--nothing to fasten, easy to don & doff, and they hide everything. I bought a few, as well as some loose caftan-style tops, last year; as well as some front-close/step-in bras. But when they re-molded my EXOS to give me an opposable thumb, I found that I could manage to rear-hook a bra. As to footwear, slides, flip-flops, mules, clogs & loafers/espadrilles can be donned with one hand (or no hands).

LoveDals

Good evening everyone.

Hurricane Dorian's approach prompted a quick trip out of town. Got to visit my brother and his is gal. It was great for my head, even if less than optimal for may wallet! Looks like the storm will skirt our area - dropping lots of rain and a bit of wind. We had to delay our return due to airport closures, so we head back from DC on Thursday evening. Tomorrow is a day at the Smithsonian museums and botanical garden :-)

Surgery is set for Sept 17....

carolehalston

Thinking about Jackie and hoping the healing is as comfortable as possible.

Hugs to Jackie and everyone else.

carolehalston

Hi to Jackie and everyone else. We are playing couples golf today at 11:30 and afterwards going out to dinner at a restaurant with the group. The forecast is for a sunny day with the temperature rising to low or mid 70's. Sounds ideal for being outdoors.

Let's all pop in and say hello so Jackie will know our forum is still alive during her convalescence.

Happy Friday.

Beaverntx

Popping in for Jackie and hoping all is going better than expected!