Starting Chemo February 2009?

MicheleS

{{{HUGS}} for you Living4today.  You have been soooo helpful to me of late.  Thanks for that!!! I hope you perk up soon!  FWIW, my last taxol was 6/18... almost a month ago.  I still can't do any strenuous activity.  But, it is getting better.  And, I *can* walk for 3 miles... slooooowly.

webwriter

Just a photo from the party last night...I'm so jealous of Ana's HAIR! It's coming. Slowly, like Michelle's walks, but it's coming!

Jaimieh

But Webbie you look stunning  

We are home and it looks like the clouds and rain followed us.  It was a tough ride home because we left so early and the kids where awake for so much of the trip but we did it.  I am glad to be home but overwhelmed by what needs to get done here.  I would get so much more done if I had some energy. 

Michele~ I am with you on I can do it but SLOW.  I used to start my training runs at 3 miles

Bethie1

Apple-- That video of you was awesome!!! You looked happy and that's important !!!! Ramble away too, we love listening!!!

Webbie-- YOU ROCK!!! Sounds like I need to bounce in here more often and spread my positiveness around!!!

Living4today-- You don't need that CRAP!! And that's exactly what it is-CRAP!!! Cancer is apart of our lives whether we like it or not--but WE ARE ALIVE!!!!! Thank God my family is so supportive--I wish you had the same, but you do --from us furies, right girls!!?? Let's take care of business and kick this Big C to the curb with the trash!!!

Need to fill my furies in on something that happened to me though.  This past Thursday and all day yesterday I had a shivery/jittery/tingly feeling in my left arm ALONG with a muscle ache that felt like it was being wrung out. I had the feeling of nausea, gurgling in my stomach as if I had too much carbonation in my stomach for half a day Thursday and all day Friday.  I mentioned this to my doctor on Friday (yesterday), and he asked several questions about symptoms he was looking for-which I didn't have and he was glad.  He would've been more concerned if it was on my right side, but told me to keep tabs on it, and take a Zantac.  I took the Zantac with my other pills with a 1 liter bottle of water--I tend to drink more soda than water.  I felt fine afterward, so maybe I got slightly dehydrated?.

Denali

Michelle, I was THRILLED to be able to walk 1 mile at the Cancer Walk a few wks ago.  3 miles is great!  You rock!  I joined the Summit Program which is 6 mos of exercise for cancer pts.  I went in for my flexibility, endurance and strength tests.  I thought sure the results were in the range of a slug, but she said I did well.  I think she was just being nice.

Webbie, I love the photo and it sounds like you had a great party.  I have a feeling that it's a party wherever you go!  You're a ray of sunshine to us!

Living4today, what a CREEP you have for a SIL!!  Do you want the Furies to go kick her bu**???  She deserves it.  You know you can't do anything about who your relatives are, but you can make choices about how often you're around toxic people like that!  Please try to avoid her--you don't need to stay around positive folks!

Bethie, what scary SEs you've had.  Isn't it crazy how we feel every sensation in our bodies and freak?  Maybe it was just a long after-effect from surgery combined with a touch of stomach flu??  Please know our thoughts are with you!  Keep drinking that water!  Or try a glass of wine??

xpectmiracles

Webbie, you are beautiful! It looks like you had a great time last night. We need to make a point to enjoy life, I think. That means avoiding people who bring us down, Living4today. I would rather be around a person that looks at the bright side of things and is positive.

Bethie, I hope you don't get that feeling in your arm again! I am at a loss as to the cause (lack of circulation? compression of a nerve?) Have you tried stretching the shoulder? I am glad you got the zantac for your stomach.

Bethie1

I'm doing OK girls--had that 1 liter of water, then another 20 oz later on when I was out gambling!!! I think my brother was right when he thought dehydraton because since I had all that water my muscles, arms and everything in between has been fine, especially my bladder.  LOL,

Didn't win any money, but had a good time with my ex as FRIENDS!!! Just to let you know that's all we'll be! 

gcpommom

Kerry:  Congrats on finishing rads!!!  The sale went ok, didn't make a whole lot of money, but it's over, and everything that was left went to goodwill today. 

I did have one customer....a man with his little girl....pay me a compliment by being 'shocked' that I have a 23 yr old!  I used to get that alot, but certainly not since I became bald!  As stupid as it sounds, it was the first time I've felt even slightly attractive since this whole ordeal began.

Web:  Congrats to you, too, on finishing rads!!!  You do look lovely and happy in that pic!

Michele:  You can walk 3 miles???  That is really good, slow or not!  I can hardly walk around the block!  In my own defense, my asthma has been terrible for the last few weeks, and that tends to slow me down more than usual.

Kim:  I'm sorry your relatives are giving you added grief...you don't need that right now.   I certainly think that we will feel better soon....I agree that those who are further out than us are giving us hope!

Jaimie:  glad you made it home safely....it is always hard when you get home from a vacation and then have to deal with all the laundry, unpacking, etc....take your time, don't overdo it...

Bethie:  glad that you are feeling better!   It's good that you are staying friends with your ex, you are a strong woman, I know how hard it is to do that, good for you!

Linda:  a slug, lol...that's a good description of how I feel, too!  An exercise program sounds like a good idea.  You are so lucky to have something like that available to you....is it through your hospital/doctors?  Maybe I can find something like that here.

Hugs to you all, and good night

Judy

Denali

I think it's just a local thing.  Here's their website:

 http://www.summitcancersolutions.org/

For $150 you get a pass into the Rec Center, nutrition classes, a fitness assessment and personal exercise prescription based on your health.  Best of all you get together with others who have had cancer.

I've lost 30 lbs with chemo and I need to keep it OFF.  So I have to start exercising and making it a part of my new lifestyle.

gcpommom

wow, Linda, 30 pounds, that a lot of weight to lose.  The fitness center sounds really nice.  I couldn't afford it, though, but maybe i can find some free classes for cancer patients somewhere.

Well, I spent the day on my wet saw, and finished the center piece for my daughters table.  The table is 36" round, and this piece is about 22 x 16".  It is a fleur de lis, which I'm sure you all know, lol.  It is still dusty/wet, but you get the idea. I was about to throw the whole thing in the trash this morning, but I plugged away until I got it right!  I love my wet saw!

KerryMac

Oh, Judy, that is just wonderful. You have a real talent.

Linda - well done on the weight loss! And good for you for starting excercising - it is the best thing you can do for yourself, post-treatment. I know some of the larger cancer centres here have free gyms, not where I am being treated though. My FIL goes to one where they live. (he had prostate cancer a few years ago)

I spent the day in the garden, and am sore but satisfied! 

Bethie1

Kerry & Webbie!! Awesome you're all done!!!

Lind---- 30lbs YOU ROCK GIRL; I apparently roll cause I have alot of rolls in the middle!! I can't even lose 1 stinken pound!!!

Judy-- YOU ARE TALENTED!!!! Nice work

Jaimieh-- --Glad you got home OK.  Safe homecomings are always best!!!

Well,. I'm off to zzz land!

Jaimieh

Awesome on the weight loss Linda. 

Judy~ I love the design. 

Today was a lazy day for me.  My little one had a birthday party that was tons of fun to see some of my Mom friends.  I only wore a hat which is a big step for me.  I normally would have worn Ronald the hair piece with my hat but I decided that I am going to just wear my hat for now on.  Now I just need to get some more coverage going so I can ditch the hat. 

Gramof3

Linda  YOU lost, I found

Will catch up tomorrow--am wiped out from attending/then driving back from my HS class reunion. Fun time, glad I went.  Have chemo tomorrow morning.  Later.  Helen

KerryMac

Jaimie - I started out my wigless adventures with just going out in a hat too, then I kind of got used to that, and got brave enough to go out topless. It just takes time to get used to it.

Speaking of going out, I am now getting out and about and running into acquaintances I haven't seen since Dx - many who don't know about the BC. So, I am having "that" conversation which is no fun! What do you normally say to people, especially when they say "well, are you OK now".  Any advice on handling it would be appreciated.....

Just got back from my walk and think I have pulled a muscle in my calf. Pooh. It is really sore. Hope it  just works itself out.

Sunny and lovely here this morning but chilly. What a funny summer it has been so far - more like a really long spring. I am not a big fan of hot weather, but it could warm up a little!! Anyhow, have a great day everyone!

gcpommom

Kerry:  I think we are getting the same weather patterns, my poor bald head was freezing under my open window this morning!  I've been having the opposite situation when I run into acquaintances I haven't seen in a while--they talk to me and say nothing about it at all!  I'm standing there with a bald head, and they don't notice???  It's wierd. I guess they feel awkward bringing it up.

Thanks to all, I'm glad you like the fleur de lis.  It feels wonderful to be doing something "normal" again.....when I'm working on the wet saw, I can not think of anything else, I have to concentrate on what I'm doing.  I'm glad I started doing mosaics again, it seems to be rather therapuetic for me.

Well, I'm off to get my blood work done.  I can't wait to be off the blood thinners, they cause SE's too, and I'm curious to see how I'll feel when everything is out of my system.

Hugs

Judy

Bethie1

Hey furies!! Just popping in real quick here. No nasty SE's like I had with arm and face anymore!!! Drank lots of water, and took a zantac.  that helped

Jaimieh

Kerry~ Repeat after me "Yes, I am okay now " Remember to smile when you are saying it and believe it.  You have done everything you can to beat the beast. 

BTW, All flurries you are supposed to remind me to say the same thing . 

I called my PCP today for my pre-op stuff and the only thing that I have to repeat according to the coordinator is blood work and an appt.  whooooo for small things.  Tomorrow I am off to my PS follow up and I am hoping I will get the go ahead to pick up more weight.  My back is getting worse so I am glad the surgery is scheduled.  I kept blaming it on the nerve pain (shoting pain) that I was having but it isn't from that now that the nerve pain is decreasing. 

I am officially back to work as of tomorrow.  I have a 1yr. old birthday session coming and while I am thrilled I am nervous also.  It's been 6 months since I have seriously picked up a camera (well I have started back but just shoting my kids) so I am hoping for a happy baby.  It's amazing 6 months ago I would have been fine (no nerves) but I am a bundle of nerves.  I have a senior session also coming up and a couple additional sessions so time to get cracking and get the cob webs out of my brain.

xpectmiracles

Wow, Judy, that design is really cool looking!

Linda, that is great that you are continuing to lose weight! You go, girl!

Kerry, I say, "so far, so good!" and give them a great big smile!

Jaimieh, good for you taking care of that phone call! I know you've been reluctant to get things rolling on the ooph.That is a big accomplishment! I see my PS on Wednesday for a follow-up. I have already started back at kickboxing class and lifting at work today. I'm not waiting for his go-ahead!

Gramof3

Judy,  I love the design.  This is a really dumb question, but what is a "wet" saw?  I've used a miter saw, but that's about it.

Expectmiracles, Jaimieh, Kerry  I admire you for taking back your "normal" lives!  Makes me want to break out in song:  "...I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman!"  O.k. so I'm old plus am having a steroid rush from T #9 this a.m.Seriously, you help me look ahead to when I'll be able to put this journey in perspective. 

My wig is hot and my duck fuzz itches, so I've been wearing a painter hat a lot, but sometimes, just go bald.  I was taking my g-daughters for pizza Friday evening and as we were getting unbuckled and out of the car, the little one told me not to forget to put on my hat.  I asked her why she said that and she said, "I don't want people staring at my little bald-headed grammy!"  This was about 20 minutes after she came in the bathroom where I was, stared at me and said, "You have a big butt."  Oh well........Take care.  Helen

KerryMac

Helen - I don't envy you wearing a wig over summer - that was part of the reason I decided to ditch mine - it just got too hot. I have to say though, your granddaughters comments made me laugh! Out of the mouths of babes!!

Jaimie - good for you for getting back into work. Sounds like you have some good jobs lined up - do you advertise? Try and relax, I know you will do great. The first step is always the most daunting one! Hope it is a happy baby too - whats that they say about working with kids and animals...??

Judy - hope you get off the blood thinners soon. I was on them for only a couple of days and I hated it. Glad you are enjoying your mosiacing again, it does feel good to get back into our old lives a bit.  

Thanks guys for the advice on what to say to people.  I find some people just say nothing (which is odd too) or else ask and then get so shocked and worried looking. I think I will practice a nice cherry "So far so good." 

Anyhow, I think I pulled a muscle or something in my calf yesterday, I was having to hobble around all day. It is feeling a bit better today. It felt like it cramped up when I was running - maybe a side effect of the Tamoxifen (anyone..?) I know I get stiff in the lower extremities in the mornings when I first get up, or when I stand up if I have been sitting on the ground (when gardening, etc) Sometimes I feel like a little old lady! It isn't too bad, just a bit annoying!

Speaking of gardening, I started making a border/wall yesterday around a flower bed with some old bricks a neighbour gave me - it is coming together quite nicely!

Have a great day everyone. 

apple

HELLO!!

You all are like my sisters.  It's nice to be back... nice to read what happened over the weekend.  So glad you are all here.

I have been vaguely disassociated from normalcy while drove the big blue truck to Minnesota and back.  the truck is huge.. it's like flying. We visited mr. apple's wonderful family. Minnesota is different.  You would not believe the number of people who were washing their cars, apparently for entertainment, because they looked clean to me.  the cars of course, were next to their boats in the driveway.

I left my hat in Kansas City.. At first I thought it was a disaster but no one seemed to notice, even the cowboys who wore hats in the country gas stations.. one who came out of the woman's restroom... cuz apparently he couldn't wait.. (had a bit of moisture up front).  ha

 I ate a ton of salmon caught from one of the little lakes that everyone fishes on... A cousin smoked 8 of them.  One of Kim's cousins own the family farmstead, a pig farm and we also had super fresh cooked pig which tasted pretty normal to me... just pork.

I did alot of thinking on the trip.  It will be an active struggle to return to what we think is normal.  

Dx 5/10/2008, IDC, 5cm, Stage IIIc, Grade 3, 4/9 nodes, ER+

KerryMac

Glad you had a great time, and happy to have you back!

apple

Kerry.. I've noticed the occasional muscle cramping.

living4today - i would so be accidentally spilling a plate of food on that woman if she were my sisinlaw

linda - wow - losing 30 pounds is monumental.   My onc. said it was good to be somewhat slim if you are a cancer patient.. so they can find things more readily.

Jamieh - "yes, I am ok now".. that is really hard to grasp.. for a week I've been trying to understand what it might mean.  we should say that every day.

Michele - always thinking of you.  don't know why (and no, I am not a stalker).

gcpommom

Morning, all!

Bethie:  I'm glad you're feeling better, keep drinking that water!!! 

Jaimie:  Good luck today with your photography session...hope the baby is in good spirits!!!  I'm sure you'll do great, and you will get some wonderful pictures.

Cheryl:  You sound great, doing kickboxing and all....how's the hair growin' going?

Helen:  a wet saw uses a diamond blade (no teeth on it) and water so that it can cut through the hard tile without chipping it.    Oh, your granddaughter sounds so cute!  The things kids will say!

Kerry:  I had a total stranger pull me aside in the grocery store yesterday....she talked to me for 10 minutes!  She was 2 years out from her dx.  I think the hardest thing is that my 'best friend' of 25+  years doesn't call, doesn't come over, and I get angry just thinking about it, so I'm gonna stop now.   The wall for your garden sounds lovely....no wonder you pulled a muscle, though!  I'm not sure about the Tamox, but I know my legs still ache every single day, so it could still be the chemo.

Apple:  Glad you are back safely from your road trip.  Yeah, I don't like those car-washing people, they make me look bad (since I hardly ever wash my van)!!!  It sounds like you had a nice time.  I think that my way of returning to some sort of normal has been to keep so busy that I have no time to think too much. 

I like Apple's comment....Sisters...that's nice, I agree with that...it is nice to know that a 'sister' is always here, ready, willing and able to listen and talk to us, even in the middle of the night.  Can't imagine not having all of you here. 

Well, DD's nurse will be here any minute, gotta clear the coffee table off for her. 

Hugs

Judy

Jaimieh

Whoo I did it my first photography session since Dx and it went great.  Gotta love it when baby is cute, in a decent mood and I had a blast.  I am a little sore now but I have about 90 pictures (not kidding) that are great and Mom loves.  Next up senior boy....

I also went to my PS this morning who thinks I am healing wonderfully.  She said the lump that is still there is scar tissue and that I had a good bit of it.  My back is still bugging the crap out of me it's just uncomfortable as hell. 

Gotta go fix dinner. 

gcpommom

Yea, Jaimie!!!  Like riding a bike, right?  Glad it went so well..and that you had a good time!

I got my issue of Cure magazine today...haven't looked through it yet, but I suddenly remembered why it is I get that magazine in the first place.  I was actually interviewed in one of their 2006 issues, when they were doing a piece on DCIS.  They sent out a photographer who took about 50 pics of me, and then used (in my opinion) one of the worst ones, and blew it up so I took up an entire page with my face! Ugh, it was really weird to see myself, so large, in a magazine, in my doc's waiting room!!!  They sent me like 10 free copies of that issue, like I was going to hand them out to my friends.  They're all still in my basement!

Cure magazine is free to cancer patients, by the way.  Well, back to my wet saw

Judy

Bethie1

Hey Jaimieh Glad you're getting back to "normal".  I've been wearing my hat from when I was half way through chemo all the way up til now I go hatless/wigless in house mostly.  When my hair started coming in--need to update you with a photo (it's even more peach fuzzy), my wig was itchy.

Kerry- Good for you about taking back your life. When people ask you about your cancer, and they will, it's OK to say you have it--it might hurt, be uncomfortable, etc., but if you let this disease get the upper hand it will win.  WE ARE THE ONES WHO ARE GOING TO WIN, RIGHT GIRLS???!! Also, (and feel free to correct me here), if these people that you ran into since your diagnosis, were your friends beforehand, but couldn't be bothered to contact you while you were "down" they're not your friends! You have us furies, we're sisters, a team, right girls??? I need to pop in here more often and cheer my sisters up; I guess I've got some work to do.

Apple--Glad you're back sis!!!

Love to all my furies!!

MicheleS

Hi everyone!  I've been reading and keeping up with all of you.  I'm so happy that everyone is doing so well!!! Ya'll are AMAZING!

I need your advice... I have a BIG meeting tomorrow with the Dean of the College of Medicine and a colleague who is accusing me of over-stepping my bounds.  Long-story-short... the guy is being an asshole.  The Dean knows it, my Chair knows it, I know it... However, he has a right to voice his opinion.   Anyway, this meeting will be nasty, no question.  So what am I worried about??? Well, my hair, of course.  Here's the deal:  Ialways wear scarves to work unless I have a meeting with people OUTSIDE the College of Medicine who don't know about my diagnosis.  Everyone present tomorrow knows.  But, this is a big deal. So, do I wear my wig?? A scarf?? Or, do I go topless??  I'm *almost* confident enough to go topless in public but not quite.  The wig will feel TERRIBLE (it is ~100 degrees outside) and the scarf makes me look weak.  Here's my topless head... ignore the jammies.

So, my sisters (thx Apple!!!), what would you do?  Seriously? In a room where 1 guy wants you demoted and the other guy is a hard-ass (but on my side)?

 xxoo 

living4today

Michele--Go topless!!!  What gorgeous hair!  After all you have been through, you shouldn't have to deal with axx holes....but will be praying all goes well for you tomorrow. 

ps.  whats the secret with growing so much hair all ready...I am still so very bald.

 I am sorry I am too tired to address all the individual posts...just want to say you all rock and it is so fun and encouraging to read what is going on with everyone's lives. 

Have a great night everyone!