Starting chemo January 2009?

jrgolomb

Hi.  Guess what??  DD finally got her license!!!!   (Alleluja sung by a chorus of angels!)

BerkeleyKim

Hi Jewels! So glad to hear everyone is doing ok, and that the reconstructions went well and all the doctors visits.

 Renel--hope your dad heals quickly!

Jess-great news for your daughter. Mine is going to take the learner permit test. I'm in NO rush, as she's just 15. But I do think she might be a better driver than her older sister.

Phylis--Hope your colonoscopy is uneventful! My husband just had his first yesterday. He did just fine, although the dr. said he didn't quite clean himself out enough before hand. He ate too late in the afternoon before his 7 am procedure. We are waiting for the results of a couple polyps they found. I need to do this as well, but I think I'll wait til summer vacation.

I'm back at work after spring break, which I spent waiting to see if I got jury duty (no!!) and studying for the RICA test, which I need to finish my credential. I'm taking 12 units at night, and just didn't have time to study and I just hope I passed--four hours of writing, and my Arimidex hand really cramped up. I've got SO MUCH homework, but I'll have my level 1 after this semester and have just a couple more classes for my masters.

 It's good for me to keep busy, because I FREAKED out over break obsessing about recurrence. I got so low I wondered if I should have some anti-depressant, but now I'm back at work and no time to obsess. So, I need to make some plans for summer, which I'd like to enjoy.

My mother-in-law died a couple weeks ago and we are having her service this Sat. I miss her. Just finished a book I know she'd love to read (Shanghai Girls--she was Chinese ancestry), but she's not here to pass it on to. She fell in her house on a Thurs. night and no one found her til Sun. She broke her shoulder and cracked her pelvis, and she seemed to be getting better in the hospital but then just couldn't improve. She was 88 and lived her life as she wanted--in her house on her own, with no "life alert" and wouldn't use the walker. She had a good life, and I'm happy we all got a chance to visit with her before she passed.

 Well, homework calls...HUGS to all

ktym

Jess, yeah!

Plutz, good luck, and renrel cracked me up thinking of 25 yo thinking of colonscopies in 25 yrs

Berkley Kim, good luck with the studying. So sorry to hear about MIL.  I was touched to hear your say it, when you said she lived life on her own terms.  I've had a couple of elderly very dear relatives who didn't do that.  Wish they had. 

I'm with you on the staying busy helping with the constant worry about recurrence.  So mad at myself sometimes for perseverating over it. Hit that point we all talk about several months back when you're screaming I stil can't tie my shoes or get out of bed from the chemo and you want it to be over all ready but its not over!  They all move on quickly and we're left with the after effects.  Then life moved on.  Found myself saying to a family member recently quit worrying about me for cripes sake, just schedule things like you always did, this breast cancer stuff needs to be over.  So, I'm now ticked if people think or ask about, then sit back and worry because its so not over for me.  How crazy is that? 

PLUTZ

Hi ladies. Well I made it through my colonoscopy. Everything went well. The dr. removed two polyps but was not that concerned but is stilll having them biobsied. I'm just really tired and I have some cramping. The prep was the worst. Was up half the night and had to get up at 4am to finish the drink. Good thing I have 2 bathrooms in the house. My husband really made me mad this morning. He's always been there for me on most of my dr. visits and of all days, we were having a tree delivered today and he just HAD to be at home to make sure it was put in the right spot. He left after the iv was inserted and I asked him if he was coming to pick me up and he said I can't , the tree service might be there. I guess a tree is more important than a wife today. My daughter picked me up and she took me to Panera for lunch before she headed for class.

My younger daughter just finished up her driving school classes but has to wait on her driving till she gets her temps. She will be 151/2 next week and then she'll go for her temps in the next couple of weeks. We went to the cemetary before Easter and I let her drive around a bit because it wasn't crowded., except for a work truck that kept following us and my daughter ran into a dirt pile. I remember those days with my first daughter. Its kind of funny but also nervewracking.

All of you have a great week.

jrgolomb

Phyllis---Oh, do I have stories about my dd and driving!!!   It took a village to get her through it all: I helped, my bbf helped her, her husband helped dd,another good friend  helped her and then her step dad helped her.  They all walked through my door ( me included) shaking and wild eyed- as if their lives had experienced a near death.    LOL!  I am so glad she is driving on her own because at least now I don't have to rest my hand on the emergency brake.  I do send out a silent prayer whenever she drives away to work or to school.  She is doing okay now, and we have just now started to chuckle about our escapades.

 I had an interesting visit with the bs.  I was getting my six month check up and she came into my room and asked if I would come to her office to chat.  So I did, sort of fearing some hidden news about BC.  Well, yes, it was about BC, but she wants me to go and talk to oncologists, nurses and some newly dx patients.  I was surprised. It will be interesting to see out it all plays out. 

Next week I have mri number two and I hope it comes back clear.

have a great weekend jjs!

Renrel

Had to cancel my PS appointment due to DS being sick.  I was supposed to see her in February, but the timing didn't work due to a vacation week for DS.  Dr was away for March, so we set it for April.  Now it is the first week in May, which is also when I have a lung scan and a 6th check up. It will be the aniversary of my last chemo infusion that week as well as my Mother's 70th, followed by Mothers day.  We are all going to a resort to celebrate.  Of course I am worrying that I might get bad news and have to hold it in all weekend.  Trying not to go there. 

DS is still home sick, longest he has every been sick.  Tends to feel good during the day and crash around 7pm.  But he is so energic at the moment I think we are at the last day.  I plan to take him out shortly for a walk to watch the runners in the Boston Marthon, which goes past our neighborhood.  

DS is hardly ever sick, but this year two of my holidays have been spent home with him.  I guess the timeing is good since I use up less sick leave which is a bit low after so many months off from work. 

ktym

Doing the happy dance tonight with a bunch of negative scans

jrgolomb

Wehawww!  Happy happy dance.  Hope to do the same with you kmmd.  I have my mri tomorrow. and mercury is in retrograde!

mnmom

Hi, I looked in on this topic & it looks like you all not only started chemo Jan 2009 but went through it together. I just found this sight a couple weeks ago but I  did 4 rounds starting 1/15/09 Taxotere & cytoxan. If I am intruding please let me know if not I appreciate it, I have seen some familiar relative things. Thanks

jrgolomb

Please join our group!

ktym

Welcome mnmom

PLUTZ

 Hi ladies.  Well my results came back from my colonoscopy and the 2 polyps were benign but the dr. said they were precancerous. All I need is another type of cancer.I'm so glad I made that appt. I also have another CT scan next month. There's still a pin size  something on my lung but  my Dr. isn't too worried. She thinks its from the radiation. Other than that, I feel fine. I'm glad everyone is doing well. Have a great week.

jillyG

Phyllis, good to hear the polyps are benign!

Kmmd - WOOHOO!

Renrel - Hope your son is feeling better soon, the poor little guy.

mnmom - Welcome  

Well Jewels, I go for an endovaginal ultrasound next Tuesday, it's just to check my ovaries, uterus etc since I've been on Tamox for 1 year.  He sends his patients for a routine scan every year I believe.  Nice to have those, I didn't survive breast cancer to be killed by my uterus!  I see my plastic surgeon on the 29th for my pre-op appt for my tissue expander placement.  I am getting the other mastectomy plus tissue expanders on both sides in June, so this is my pre-op visit to discuss the details.  Getting excited for my surgery even though it's still 2 months away. 

Bye for now, hope everyone is having a lovely day I know the weather up here is fabulous, it's like summer out, everyone has shorts on.  But, it is Alberta Canada afterall, it could go from shorts weather back to snow, you never know.  knock on wood......

jrgolomb

I made it through the mri.....now I wait.  Yikes

mnmom

jrgolomb,  kmmd, &  jillyG ....Thanks alot  Wish I had known of bc.org earlier but I appreciate the welcome. As I mentioned before I have seen alot already that I can relate to & I think those in my own treatment time frame helps. Have you all only had chemo or rad too cause I had 33 rads.

BerkeleyKim

Kmmd and Phyllis--Doing the happy dance right beside you! Great news on the benigns and the neg scans. What scans do you have to do Kmmd? Wow--quick results on the polyp biopsy. My dh is still waiting on his.

Jess--I'm sure your MRI will be fine. I think my surgeon has agreed to order me one for this summer. I think it's an insurance thing, but the mammograms didn't pick up my 3 tumors, so I really want one even though they are so unpleasant.

mnmom--glad you found us. I did the full monty--mastec., chemo, rads, 2 trials and ongoing Arimidex, which I hope is what's causing my aches and pains.

Jilly-glad your dr. is watching out for you. That recon is right around the corner!

renrel-sorry about your sick boy. There are still some nasty bugs going around our school (including lice--ICK!!), and those kinders are still building their immune systems (and knocking out mine).

 Got a letter from my onc saying he's going part-time and will phase out seeing patients. I really liked him, and now I need to find someone else I trust. Right now I go in every 3 months. Some women in my cancer support group gave me some names, none of whom are in his group although they are in other groups at the same hospital. I think I'll cry when I see him next--never have in front of him, but I'm feeling sentimental.

mnmom

BerkeleyKim... sorry your are in pain! 

Thanks was'nt sure if this was chemo only.

Thanks again for the welcome

jrgolomb

mnmom--Oh my goodness, but BC is the PITS!!!  And that is putting it mildly. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that, especially the part with the mistakes done during surgery.  I am also sorry about dh.  I go around and around in my relationship with dh.  He deals with bc by acting as if nothing even happened.  That has been probably the toughest part for me to get around.  Thank goodness for bc.org and this thread.  Could NOT have dealt with it all, can NOT deal with it all without this venue.  I can laugh, cry, wonder, question, rage and vent on this site and everyone understands. 

ktym

DH and I have spent a lot of time the last few days discussing BC and how hard it has been for me to move on, disppointment we both have in how much weight I gained starting Tamox, he gets angry when I let work stress me etc.  So much to deal with.BC really does stress things. I've had people tell me they were positive their marriage would make it through BC.  I'm thinking, how does anyone know that?  You don't really know what you're going to go through yet.  How he reacts to the mastectomy and flat chest and/or baldness is the tip of the iceburg. 

mnmom

jrlomb & kmmd, Thanks

Yes, I have to be careful how I post as to not terrify newbies, BC is the pits & terrifying enough without the extra's.  I think that through here I can find the support I am looking for.

jrgolomb

Oh yeah, I hear ya... chemo fog.  It happens at the worst times!

ktym

mnmom,  hear you on not scaring newbies.  Although, I do get frustrated hearing so many of them encouraged to do chemo.  It almost killed me (my Onc's words) and left me with SE's that effect my daily life and my career.  In the time frame I/we did it in one other has severe heart failure from the Adria.  I have to keep reminding DH, recurrence or mets are very disabling too, you know, because he is quite angry still at the whole thing and wishes "we" hadn't done the chemo.  So, I get frustrated when I see women asking should I do chemo for a small benefit, my first Onc says no, and they are encouraged to "do all they can" and find another Onc.  The stuff is poison, some of us have to take it, but, cripes sure wish I hadn't had to have done it.

Speaking of which, just had to check and count pills in the pill box I use because chemo brain left me thinking, shoot, did I take that this morning?  Just emptied another Tamox bottle--yahoo.  I get them in a 3 months supply, so 4 down, 16 to go.

mnmom

congrats on the meds every step counts. The chemo sure does seem to kill alot of stuff even stuff you do not want to have gone. It is a shame.

ktym

This year I'm determined to put in some flowers.  I haven't done it before, but love them, and its going to mark the beginning of some life changes I'm determined to make.  Way too wet out there today, however

mnmom

Yes, I know what you mean life changes....I am working on that too. Good grief my spelling last time sorry. I forgot to spell check. What kind do you like? I planted morning glories for the first time.

BerkeleyKim, My onc left after 1 rechck following chemo He was very caring. It stunk, I was so upset/mad. I did not even want to go meet the new one Glad I did she is wonderful! More informative, BC info in exam rooms etc. I thought he was it until I met her. Hope you have the same luck.

jrgolomb

Oh my goodness, kmmd so true.  I have been horrible lately.  I am going to get the day by day pill box, cause I can't even remember when I take the pills during the day.  It is awful.  I have also been elected to be on a board and lately the issues I have had to deal with I can barely keep track with, let alone make decisions and write recommendations.  The doctor I saw two weeks ago said the chemo fog would last about a year and I have to say, I am WAY past that.  Sigh.

jillyG

Hello Jewels!  I am going for my endovaginal ultrasound today.  Now that I've been on Tamoxifen for 1 year my doc wants a check.  I am kind of nervous and I certainly hate the whole full bladder thing.  It's funny, after everything I (we) have been through, an ultrasound should be a piece of cake eh?   It's endo-vaginal so they insert a wand and it gives them a much better look than regular U/S.  Never had one before, kind of nervous.  I have pelvic pressure a lot almost like a bowling ball is on my bladder and I have bloating every day. From what I've been reading that is very common to have a thickened uterine lining on Tamoxifen which causes the bloating.  Has anyone had an endo-vag U/S?  I hope the Tamox isn't wreaking havoc on my uterus because I am not willing to stop the medication, I really feel it's my lifeline.  All docs told me that it's more important than the chemo for me.  Wish me luck ladies! 

ktym

I had one a few years back jillyG.  My memory of it is that it wasn't that bad.  Better than a mammogram.  Probably fairly technician dependent, though.  I'm with you on the Tamox, so happy the SE's have settled down and we're getting along ok now.  When I was just mentioning to DH yesterday a year down and 4 to go on the Tamox, he said, what then?  It was obvious he feels it as a lifeline too.  Told him, who knows, by then I'm sure what we're doing after 5 years of Tamox will be totally different then what we're doing now. 

mnmom

jillyG, Hope you survived today. I have had several but imagine since I have had a hysterectomy in Feb that I will not need any more. I had to stop the last exam to go to the bathroom. Never had that problem before. Hope everything went well for you. Today it looked like it was snowing...cottonwood fluff. Glad I do not suffer from allergies.

jrgolomb

Hello.  MRI  ALL CLEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Yeeehaw!!!!!!!