Starting Chemo May 2008
Comments
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Your posts are not too long! They are not too short! They are juuuuuuuuuuust right.
Good holidays to you, Eddie!
xoxox jeanne
PS Mom's visit -- how is/did it go?!
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Hey now, I think your posts are juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right! If you got something to say dang it then say it! If I don't feel like reading all of it then, I will come back and read later. :OP
We went out for a drive today after the book sale. I took off my scarf and let the breeze blow thru. It felt so weird and so good at the same time ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
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Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.....shame on you. You should know us all better than that. It is so hard to read "tone" on a message board. I LOVE your verbosity (is that a word?). I think we all do. I need it, personally, as I'm an introvert and actually more shy than any of you could possibly know. YOU have been such a joy to read.
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Today DH and I attended a Hope and Healing breast cancer "seminar" put on by a major medical group here. My surgeon and Oncologist were speakers, as well as the radiologist that I met with and the doctor that evaluated my mammo and ultrasound.
I got a renewed feeling of purpose, in a way. I guess I'm trying to find WHY we were handed this challenge. I feel that I somehow am supposed to fit in to helping other women in this situation.
I was surprised to find my Oncologist refer to me, without naming me, on finding support in this discussion board. How connecting with others in your situation (support groups), he used connecting with others starting chemo in October 2008, is important. I didn't realize how much her really did listen when I talked to him. I was humbled.
Me and one other woman were pretty much the only "patients" in attendance. Others were people who either wanted to get in the field (student nurses) or those who wanted education. This was their first seminar on subject. I think they did well.
They held the seminar at a local casino resort. Needless to say....my $25 in the slots...eh...they let me play for a while. Came home with $0 but a good feeling of purpose.
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Jen - You hair looks FABULOUS!! How far out are you? These were taken this week...8 weeks post chemo. I'm super happy with it. I didn't mention in my previous post but my Onc....had to touch my hair. LOL! It didn't insult me at all. I thought it was thoughful and funny.
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Eddie! We are too-much-is-never-enough posters! MORE! MORE! MORE!
Sable,and Adrienne! that hair is gorgeous and REAL!! None of that fluffy baby-blonde. How do you post pics here? Step by step, now! I want to post a pic of my (mangy-dog) head.(Which goes with my dog-tired-ass). I added mild sunburn to it today! My stepD (Alice) and I did a two hour walk through the bush. It was so brilliant. (She is getting her schizophrenia under control..kind of puts things in perspective) but the dome is a bit pink. I'll just pretend it's rads-sympathy for all you gals being zapped. XX
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Here's a good one for you: yesterday afternoon, I was out knocking on doors for Obama in a nearby neighborhood. I came to a house with an Obama lawn sign out front, and almost skipped it - they were obviously supporters - but I decided to knock anyway (who knows, maybe they'd be interested in volunteering as well, right?). So, anyway, a very familiar-looking woman answers the door. We exchange a few sentences, and then she says, "oh my God, we're running into each other everywhere."
I look at her more closely, trying desperately to place her, and it suddenly dawns on me that she was one of the nurses in the operating room when I had my mastectomy last March. (We had a chat then, too, after I was wheeled in. She used to go out with a former coworker of mine, and recognized my name on my chart. She's also friends with my neighbor, as it turns out.)
So, anyhow, her face was the last thing I saw before I went under. And there it was again. In a way that's hard to explain, I found the whole thing comforting. It was comforting to see her in normal clothes in her (very cool) little bungalow, comforting to be wearing normal clothes myself, comforting to be able to say, "oh yes, I'm done with chemo" and realize that for all the physical changes and emotional turmoil, life is going on.
Linda (loving the hair pictures, and hoping to post some myself as soon as I get it together)
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First of all, I am loving looking at all your beautiful heads!!! MORE, MORE!!
And Miss Eddie - Don't even think about it. I was just thinking yesterday about missing you and your posts. And I think Tina Fey is rivaling Gilda Radner for SNL fame (okay, as a side note it took me a good 30 seconds to remember Gilda's name - Feck off chemo brain!!). You post, girl.
Randie - I think I was so focused on your good news, that I ignored your bad (seriously, when I read Rock's post, I was like "Fifteen? Fifteen what?"). So I agree with Kerry, Feck off fifteen!! Now I'm on another page and I can't remember when you said you were starting, but I will be going through at least Thanksgiving. We are hanging in there.
Linda - Lovely story - wish I had energy to campaign for Obama, too, so good for you!!
Rock - Shopping was not too bad. We found warmer clothes and a Halloween costume for the 5 y.o. (a "sparkly" witch). And you don't need to be brilliant to say something to me - "Hey!" is good, too.
WARNING...POLITICAL VIEWS ABOUT TO COME OUT...
Okay, I love this - my 9 y.o. found face masks of McCain and Hillary Clinton and being undecided for Halloween, decided she wanted to be Sarah Pallin (she couldn't see out of the McCain mask - hmmmm). She made me snort when she said it, (hope I'm not offending anyone...), because this is not a tribute. But that also shows me that she's been paying attention to our familial political discussions - I love it!
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Eddie,
Your posts are NOT too long, they are perfect. I love them! Please don't stop! PLEASE,,,,
Kerry,
Ahem. My hair is coming in fluffy-baby-blonde.
Rock,
Miss you, miss you, miss you.
Karin,
Glamorous you. Using the picture is fine with me. You go, girl!
I am feeling well, weather is finally cooler here, beautiful day here today, 70s and windy. Gotta love Texas.
Hope everyone has a great day!
Sue
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I look at your hair or is it your hairs when I refer to many of your heads of hair and I get excited thinking what mine might look like sometime soon. I am just a few weeks post chemo (like Jenn) but a little behind in hair. Mine started coming in sooner but it i not growing that quickly or maybe it is and I just have a hard time noticing because it is coming in white. Rock, my mom's visit was fascinating to say the least. She is a complex and wonderful person but probably the highest need person I have ever met. Her mother had four kids before her and had my mom at 44 thinking, of course, she was going through the change of life. She never really recovered from that in terms of self esteem. I will try to post a picture of my hair as I do whatever Jenn tells me. I will try. Thanks for the weigh in about the length of my posts. I am a wordy girl and I think I drive many of you nuts. Okay...I'll try take a photo to show my meager hair. Hey, I did find two eyelashes trying to come in.... Be back in a few I hope.
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Eddie,
Hear me, daulink:
YOU DO NOT DRIVE ME NUTS!
I'll bet everyone here agrees with me!
Love you AND your posts,
Sue aka fluffy-baby-blonde
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Hard to get the shot I am looking for...hmmm. Thanks Sue.
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Okay, so you can't really see it, but it's there. No...really.
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Hair........(still wearing my fedoras)
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OK, first I will add to the hair growth update.
Don't have time right now to go into detail about my TV appearance. Will fill you in later. All I will say now is I met Dr. Marisa Weiss, founder of this site. I almost teared up when she walked into the room. I thanked her for this site and told her that her site and the great bunch of women I met here is what got me through chemo. I showed her our pics and she loved the IV Pole Dancing thing.
Here is a picture of me after the make over and a picture of Dr. Weiss and myself.
P.S. - Dr. Weiss if you see this I'm sorry I used the photo with your eyes closed but the other one was a terrible picture of me. Even though your eyes are closed you still look great.
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Wow, Karin: you look absolutely GREAT. Can't wait to hear the full story of your TV appearance. In the meantime, I just think it's so cool that you had a chance to meet Dr. Weiss and thank her personally. I kind of feel as though I was there, via our group picture.
Way. To. Go.
Linda
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Your post was the perfect end this really beautiful good-feeling gorgeous October day.(Can't wait for the clip!)
P.S. You have a million dollar smile.
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Karin, what an amazing day you must have had and to top it all off, meet Dr. Weiss. Thanks for making me a part of it.
All you hair shots look great. Mine's slowly growing in and I'll shoot one soon (if I can remember how to use photobucket, fricking chemo brain).
Randie-Frick the fifteen! Rads aren't that bad, you can do this...
Eddie, I enjoy reading your posts and everyone's on here. Please keep up the good work.
Had my Anointing of the sick mass yesterday. Didn't know exactly what to expect. My in-laws were there as well as my oldest sister and my daughters and hubby. I started to tear up when the priest placed his hands and my head and anointed my forehead with oil. My youngest saw my tears and started crying. My sister had to escort her out, she almost started hyperventilating. I wanted to comfort her myself but had to stay through the mass. She has kept this in for so long. The women in front of us gave us a kleenex and took her hand. She told her that she had been touched by the holy spirit. After mass, another women stopped by us and said the same thing. I've always believed in God and tried my best to raise my kids the same way. I tried really hard not to cry. It did my soul good to attend the mass. I always thought about how hard this is on my kids but didn't expect it. I just I knew I would cry, I'm just that way. She's always been the tough one, never letting anyone see her emotions. I just kept reassuring her that I'm not going anywhere. Not for a very long time. The more people I have praying for me, the better I said. Thanks ladies for being here for me...
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oh lookie at my fellow fuzzies!!!!!!!!!! Yay for new hair growth!!!!!
Adrienne~ I'm about 6 weeks out(ish) I can't wait for a full cover on my head. Like rock said in another post today... bald heads get cold!
Sue said daulink <giggle>
Eddie~ if you do everything I say..... "get on a plane and come have lunch with me!" LOL
Karin~ your makeover looks fabulous! Did you take your own wig or did they supply one (and let you keep goodies)?
Kerry~ hopefully one of us can dig up the directions to post the pic on here.... best I can say is have it loaded into photobucket. Copy the direct img link. start a new post here and click on the tree.... add the link in there. Sometimes I have to do that part twice to make it work.
Linda~ how neat you got to see her again.
Cris~ how you feeling this week? things getting better after your last chemo yet???
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Roxi~ snuck in and posted when I wasn't looking LOL. Your story made me tear up. It was good for my soul as well sweetie <squish>
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Sueper, I can throw around the line 'fluffy baby-blonde' because that's what I have!! In fact I am afraid of it growing into an 'Eraser-Head' of baby blonde, like that boxing manager..what's his name...
All your hair looks magnificent! O-h-h-h but there's a lot of hope going on on this thread now!! Karin, well done girl! You look brilliant! Roxi I got a bit teary when you said you got a bit teary! How old is your daughter? It's good that she participated and was able to 'let go'. She must be a very brave girl. Powerful emotions are good..especially in that setting where it's all ok and you are all so loved. Fantastic.
Is anybody going to tell me how to post pics? OR are you all scared of seeing my sunburnt semi-chrome-mainly-fluffy-baby-blonde-dome? XX
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Kerry - I'm not very good at it (mostly 'cause I can't remember feck!), but once I did it through Photobucket, it was pretty easy. You have to create an account there and load the picture from your computer onto the website. Then, after it's loaded there, do what Jen said two posts above.
Mary - Your story made me tear up, too. I think that's the main reason I have (ironically) avoided church throughout most of this. It is the fear of crying in front of (mostly) strangers. And the fear that once it starts, I won't be able to stop without hyperventiliating. I'm so with you.
Karin - Awesome!! You look terrific and it sounds like you had a great time!!
Sue - Hey! Still fighting fatigue 10 days out. I've usually "bounced" back by now, but last night I fell asleep with little dd at 8:30. Yep. Still fighting fatigue. Which makes me a bit nervous about starting rads tomorrow. Oh well.
And I think,.like Rock, I have become a bit jaded about treatment. Before surgery and chemo, I was an information hound. Reading, researching, looking things up on two or three websites. Now I could almost care less. I haven't read much, except what you all have posted about it. I may be sorry. Oh well. I think the dog. ass. tired may have something to do with it, too. Speaking of which, time for bed, girls.
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Karin - What an incredible day meeting Dr. Weiss. Thanks for showing our photo, we are all thankful for this site. I cannot wait to hear more.
Eddie - Some folks have the gift of writing and you are one of them. Your posts are NOT too long, they are enjoyable and I miss reading them.
Randie - Kerry stated it best, Feck off 15!! We are thinking of you sweetie!!
Linda - Cool story. Those brief moments of feeling normal are absolutely priceless.
Mary - What a beautiful story about the mass, your family there and your brave daughter. It all brought tears to my eyes. Know that I am praying for you too.
Have a happy Monday!
Jean
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Karin-great pics! You look awesome! It is great that you got to meet Dr.Weiss.
Randie-hope that you are still recovering so well. Lymph nodes suck.
Love seeing everyone's new hair growth. Mine is mostly growing on the top, still sparse on the sides and in theback. Patience.
Eddie-I love your posts-keep 'em coming!
Everyone have a great Monday!
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Hi Everyone,
We had a great weekend in Arkansas- my daughters band was wonderful in their half time show. Hubby and the boys came up the second night with the camper and we camped out at DeGray State Park which is beautiful - nothing like S'mores to aid in chemo and rads recovery! I even let the kids eat them for breakfast on Sunday lol. I am taking today off to recuperate and celebrate my birthday and Columbus day!
RanD- you can do rads and we will help you through. I have finished 18 of 33- have a slight amount of pink and am using aquaphor and Vitamin E cream. I started using the Vitamin E cream the day before I started rads. I may have to get something stronger if I start having more reaction but these have gotten me through the first 3 1/2 weeks.
Rads also make me completely wiped out- well that started last week. I slept everyday after getting home. I work from 8-2:30 and then go to rads and then home to bed LOL. I have been a church pianist for years and I finally told them last week I needed to go on leave for the rest of the year- I jsst dont have the energy to handle the Wednesday night rehearsals and practice time (since they picked out a 100 page Christmas contata) - I do have to say I enjoyed having the weekend to my own this past weekend so I may like not having the extra job lol.
Karin- LOVE the hair- love everyone else's too. Mine is coming in pretty thick but still really short- I have about 40% gray and the 60% dark brown/black- it is still changing so I dont know what I will end up with- cant tell if it is curly or straight yet. It was salt and pepper before chemo but noone knew thanks to my hairdresser Pam!
How exciting on the TV show- I wasnt here to reply but you definitely have my permission.
Hope everyone has a great week- this is my Herceptin week (on Friday)- it sure seems like those 3 weeks in between flies by these days!
Kristy
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Kristy,
Have a great today.
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Posting Pictures
You can not upload a photo from your computer to post in the thread. It must be online somewhere to post. This is why many will use photobucket. I upload mine to my MySpace page. Once the picture is online somewhere all you have to do is Right-click on it and then click copy. Once in post a reply box when you get to where you want to add photo right click again and then click on paste. If a small Internet Explorer Box pops up asking Do you want to allow this webpage to access your Clipboard?, click on Allow Access. Some times you will have to click 2 or 3 times before it will paste. Hope this helps.
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Randie - I hope you are continuing to recover well today. I'm with everyone else...FECK th 15!!
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For those needing to go braless- Im in that club too with rads- New York and Company has something called Body Shapers- like a tank top with built in shelf bra- they are really soft and I have been using those some where totally braless would not work. I layer them under other things or wear a jacket over them.
Kristy
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Beating the Odds Against Breast Cancer update
I still haven't seen the broadcast myself. As of yet there is no link on ABC for a video. I am still waiting to hear if there will be. My family told me that on the first shot I looked very nervous. I knew this before they told me. Because it was a live show we did a quick run through before hand. During the run through the camera was only on me for a little bit. During the live show the camera stayed on me longer while they introduced me. Rock called my smile a Million Dollar smile. My husband calls one of my smiles a dumb grin. I know which one he is referring to because it is a dumb grin. So when the camera didn't move off of me I was thinking am I doing the dumb grin or am I OK?
Thank God the only time I had to talk was when the host asked me "So Karin how do you feel? I wanted to be creative and respond with "Thanks to the American Cancer Society and Mary Ann I now Look Good and Feel better". After all that was the reason for me being on the show, to promote the Look Good...Feel better program. Instead my nervousness took over and I gave a quick either Fine, thank you or Good, thank you reply. I don't even remember which one it was I said.
To sum it all up I am a little embarrassed of myself on air. My family told me I also did my nervous twitch thing. I wear dentures and sometimes when I am nervous I suck my dentures back up tight. They told me I did that but I still looked fine and not to worry about it. Oh well I wasn't on to look glamorous anyway. I was on to give hope to those getting ready to go through hair loss and show you can look normal and not like a cancer victim. I did manage to accomplish that.
The highlight of my day was meeting Dr. Weiss. I still can't believe I got to talk with her. You never know how much things you do can touch the lives of others. I let her know and see (through our pictures) how she is responsible for bringing us all together. I gave her a big teary eyed thank you from all of us.
Dr. Weiss was wearing the Breast Cancer logo necklace available for purchase on this website. If you don't know about it you can find it by going to the Breast Cancer .org homepage. Go to the bottom and click on Visit our gift shop. I would proudly wear this necklace because it is a reminder of all of you and what got me through my ordeal. I wish they made it in silver so I could afford to purchase one.
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